Robin's Avatar

(Disclaimer: This is a fanfiction set in a crossover between White Wolf's Mage the Ascension setting and Robert Jordan's Wheel of Time. I have no rights to either setting and this fanfiction is only written for my own amusement and not meant to step on any copyright toes. All honor and glory go to those who have actually created these two wonderful settings, they can not be praised enough.)

Chapter 1 What in the world happened to Robin St'Martin's Avatar

Part 1

«I will never leave you.»
Robin St. Martin's brown eyes shot open as the strange whisper brushed against his mind like a feather kissing the surface of a pond. The young mage sigh his shirt and boxers where soaked with sweat and even now a lingering feeling of panic made his heart race. Robin sat up and reached out a slender hand for the glass of water that sat on his nightstand, he had dreamed again. The young initiate sigh as the taste of the cool liquid slowly brought him back to reality, always the same dream, a dream he could not fully grasp, a town that looked like it might belong three centuries back in time, but with no church and with a landscape that felt so oddly familiar, and then just fear, pain and despair, the dream descending into a mess of colors and disjointed faces like looking at a reflection in a broken mirror. Robin swung his legs out of bed, there would be no more sleeping tonight, at least not before he had managed to calm down, if the managed to calm down.
«Are these your memories?»
Robin whispered to his Avatar, but as usual there where no answer.

Chantry Mercury's Blood lay in darkness, for the most part. A Chantry of this size never slept, not completely, there where always someone on guard duty, after all one would not want to wake up just to look down the barrel of a Technocrat's enforcer, and here and there light under a door or whispering voices around a corner indicated that someone was awake, but for the most part Mercury's 35 Awakened members slept and the Chantry's hallways where only illuminated by the moonlight streaming in through the large, angular windows. Robin walked down the corridor that housed Mercury's sleeping quarters, he briefly stopped by the door leading to his mentor Tiernan's room, but considering that the large grandfather clock at the end of the hallway showed five minutes past three the young mage thought better of it and decided to let the older Verbena sleep, and what could Tiernan have done anyway, he could not make any more sense of Robin's nightmares than the young man himself could, there where no need to ruin the night's sleep for another as well.

Robin made his way to the Chantry's kitchen, a large, untidy area that had just the amount of chaos you would expect from a place where food for 35 magi and their various allies and servants where prepared every day. The young Verbena fetched a soda from the fridge and sank down on one of the uneven, wooden kitchen chairs that surrounded the large old oak table where the various mages who called Mercury's Blood their home took their meals. Robin sipped his drink and sat staring into the green tiles that decorated the wall behind the old industrial oven towards the far end of the wall.
«There are always some issues with walk ins, but your apprentice's Avatar is healthy and strong, the boy will become a powerful mage one day, there is no need to worry my friend.»
That is what Tiernan's associate the Virtual Adept Master of the Spirit Sphere known as Cita had told the old Verbena when the man had expressed concern over the nightmares his apprentice where having and the voice that seamed to come from his Avatar which again and again swore it would never again leave it's host. The young mage pushed his bottle of apple soda back and forth on the table with his fingers as his mind wandered. Yes his Avatar was a walk in, the being had not been born into him as he took his first breath, rather it had found Robin at some later point, probably when he had been deadly sick as a babe only few months old and had nearly died, when the bonds between the baby and it's sleeping Avatar was weakened as the new born host grew closer to death the walk in had attached itself and probably saved Robin's life in the process and now it completely dominated the much weaker Avatar the young Verbena had been born with, an Avatar probably to frail to ever Awaken.

Robin finished his drink and rested his head on a thin hand, in many ways he was grateful the walk in had found him, as this new Avatar was now as much a part of him as the silent being who had joined him at birth, and this one was Awakened, it provided the link between flesh and spirit needed for magick and troublesome as it was Robin could not imagine going through his life as a sleeper, never knowing what lay behind the finely constructed lines of reality that most of humanity was bound by, but as grateful as the young man was for his strong Avatar, it made him wonder at times, a walk in, that meant it had not followed the normal process of rebirth, it had not been guided to Robin by the unseen influences of the Well of Souls, or fate or whatever those who cared about the philosophy of it all said played matchmaker between Avatar and host, instead it had found Robin on it's own and decided to claim him.
«What happened to you in your last incarnation?»
Robin spoke into the dark kitchen, but none answered him, his Avatar had never been very talkative and seamed to be rather content to just function as a Fount, as the mages of the Old Faith back in the dark ages called their Avatars before they learned to see them as more than just a conduit for magickal energy, no the only time Robin's Avatar spoke was those desperate, whispered promises to never leave the boy's side. Tiernan said that Robin should not worry about his Avatar's apparent silence, that as long as the boy was on the right path towards enlightenment his soul shard did not need to speak to guide him, perhaps all that was true, but Robin wished the spirit he shared such a close symbiotic relationship with would be a bit more communicative and at least explain the strange nightmares and desperate pleas it presented to it's young host.
«You should not keep me awake like this you know, I have a championship next week and I need to be able to concentrate at practice.»
Robin said knowing that even if it would not answer his Avatar could hear him, it was always there, a presence deep inside him, to deep to really explain, only another mage would understand, but it was there, watching, guiding, both a part of him, and a creature in it's own right, it was both friend and a mentor, though in this case, a rather silent one.
«It is not that easy to be both studying to be a mage and trying to compete as a figure skater, I need my sleep.»
Robin continued but he knew it was pointless, his Avatar could hear him, the young mage was sure of that, but whatever or not the spirit could understand such mundane concepts and concerns as needing sleep to study was rather doubtful. Robin sigh and tosses his now empty soda bottle into the recycle bin. He would at least have to try to get some more rest, but from the panic he felt when his mind wandered back to the unintelligible dream he had woken up from half an hour earlier he knew that sleep would not come easy this night, if at all.

Part 2

Robin gave an elegant bow to the audience as applause and cheers bathed the station in an ear numbing roar, on top of it all the announcer shouted.
«This is about as close to flawless as one can get, don't you agree Steve?»
A second announcer took over as Robin picked up a flower a woman had tossed out on the ice and waved his tanks before he left the arena, scathing towards where his trainer and manager waited for the young athlete with a big grin on his chubby features.
«You are right Dave, he is only fifteen years old this boy, but I think we will be seeing allot from him in the future, I have never seen such balance, in fact I have never seen this kid fall, not once, it is as if he defies gravity itself I can not see how the judges can give anything but sixes all around for that performance...»
Robin's attention drifted from the announcer to the scoreboard as his coach helped him get his skates off. The young boy allowed himself a slight grin, Tiernan would not be pleased that he had used magick while on the ice and he would surly get another lecture about the law of shade and the dangers of the Technocracy not to mention Paradox, but really it was not like Robin had gone vulgar out there, he had only nudged reality a bit, it could hardly be called cheating either, after all everyone else used whatever edge they had to get ahead in the competition, so why should not he? And besides learning magick did cut into the time had had available for training so he might as well put his abilities to good use. It might be a little risky but the scores that showed up as each judge evaluated his performance made it all worth it.
«You have this Robin.»
Gustav Heller his skating coach said as he slapped the young boy on the back.
«Though how you pulled that last jump off I will never know, it is almost enough to make an old cat like me believe in magick kid, silly eh?»
Robin just smiled, he wished he could tell Gustav about the Traditions, about what lay just beyond the illusions of reality he so clung to, but it would not be right, if the old man knew about the Ascension war he would be a target and Robin could not do that to him, drag him into a centuries old conflict he knew nothing about, and had no way to defend himself in.
«I was just lucky Gustav.»
Robin said eventually and shrugged it off, then he added.
«Lucky to have a coach like you, if there is magic in my performance old man it is all you.»

Later that evening Robin walked home from the stadium, a new gold medal in his dark green gym bag.
«Keep this up kid and we will be looking at the Olympics next year.»
Gustav had said which had filled Robin with pride and joy, he loved to figure skate, when gliding over the ice he felt free, his mentor Tiernan used lengths of yearn as a focus for his rotes, the old Spellweaver forming models of what he imposed on the patterns of reality with his magick, it helped him focus, but for Robin however his foci had always been dance, and above all ice dance when the world melted away and it was only him and motion, like flying over the ice.
«Hey you Verbena, what the fuck was that back there?»
An angry voice behind him woke Robin out of the warm, fuzzy feeling of victory and brought him back to the cold, dark street he was currently walking down. The apprentice Spellweaver turned and looked right into the blue eyes of a tall, slender boy perhaps three years older then himself.
«Eh, what do you mean?»
Robin said as he tried to remember who the other boy was, he was referring to him as Verbena so obviously he knew about mages and probably was one himself. Slowly it dawned on Robin he had met the other kid before, last year in fact, when his mentor had taken him to a Tribunal to get more experience with other mages than those who made their home at Mercury's Blood.
«You are Luke Harris are you not? Of the Virtual Adepts, I think we met last year.»
Robin asked and the fair haired young man nodded, though he looked no less furious than he had been ten seconds ago.
«That is right, now I am asking you again, what the hell was that on the ice back there, you where working magick in full view of the public, there is a wonder the Top Hats and Mirror Shades are not here already, are you an idiot?»
Luke glared at Robin, who glared back, how dared this kid hardly older than himself lecture him like this as if he where his superior? Robin sat and took that kind of crap from Tiernan and the other Masters, but he would not do so from a student hardly older or more experienced than himself.
«Yeah I used magick, not that it is any of your concern, it is not like I went vulgar or anything, so what is your problem?»
Robin answered as calmly as he could, despite being more that a little ticked off at the other mage butting into his affairs, but this only seamed to infuriate Luke more.
«Idiot! Sure you might not be hit over the head by Dox, but you can be damned sure the Technocracy saw that, your little saw was broadcasted on national TV after all, and if we are unlucky they will come to check it out and they do not care which mage they take down, they want us all dead remember. I have my Cabal in the area and now my friends are all in danger because of some little athletic twat felt like showing off. The reason why we have the law of shade is not just to protect the individual mage, I mean if you want to court being caught by the top hats and mirror shades go ahead and see how much anyone cares, but when you put the rest of us in danger, then we have a problem.»
Luke was pointing angrily at Robin as he spoke and the young Verbena found that he had taken just about all he was going to from this rude Virtual Adept.
«Now listen here, you have no right to say what I should or should not do, and if you are so concerned about your Cabal why are you not with them instead of wandering the streets acting like a jackass, perhaps you want the Technocracy to come, after all it is not that long ago that you test tube babies where with part of them! For all I know you are just waiting for a chance to go back.»
Robin regretted his words as soon as he had spoken them, anger had gotten the best of him and he was just about to apologize when Luke's fist impacted with his jaw and sent him to the ground in a heap, exactly how Luke had managed to move so quickly and close the distance between in the blink of an eye Robin did not know, Correspondence magick perhaps, but in either case Luke now stood over the much smaller Verbena mage practically fuming with rage.
«You will never know how my Tradition have suffered at the hands of the Technocracy you ignorant witch!»
Luke shouted, his normally brown eyes where so filled with hurt and rage that they looked almost black as they scowled down at the younger man. Robin lifted one hand to his lip which had split open and was bleeding, he then looked up at Luke and lifted both his hands in an apologetic gesture.
«I know, I know man I should not have said that, I am sorry, I was angry and I did not think before I spoke, listen if you are worried about your Cabal, the Chantry I live in is not far, I am sure the Deacon would not mind letting you guys spend the night, you would be completely safe there.»
Robin hoped his apology would be enough to calm the boiling mood of the other young mystic, but no such luck.
«So you now you try to take it back, hell witch you do not just call me a Technocrat and expect to get away with it do you? I demand retribution, let us settle this as mages, I challenge you to a Core War, I will make you eat your words!»
Luke Harris' challenge was pointless, the young Verbena Spellweaver had no way to use or even understand the technomagick involved in a Core War, and the Adept off course knew this, he most likely expected Robin to make a counter challenge of the Duel Arcane or some other form of dueling both mages could accomplish, and Robin knew this, or at least his conscious mind did, but even so an uncontrollable anger welled up in him, the feeling was jumbled, chaotic and it clearly did not come from his own mind but from his Avatar.
«I will not allow anyone to take you from me!»
The strange voice belonging to Robin's walk in Avatar sounded again, it was like a melody played in the innermost core of his being, and yet so faint that he could barely hear the words, only feel them and as those words sounded and the emotions behind them filled him the young mage just lost it.

The first thing that happened was that every single street light which where illuminating the narrow alleyway exploded, the Spellweaver then turned his attention to Luke himself and the patterns of reality where rewoven around him, just enough to impose Robin's will on gravity itself. Luke grabbed for his phone, obviously intending to use the small computer as a focus to unleash his own magick, but the technomancer could not match the Spellweaver's speed, and while the Virtual Adept where a full Disciple and a far more capable mage than his young Verbena assailant he was caught completely by surprise as Robin made gravity itself into a weapon. Luke screamed as several of his bones snapped under the other mage's effect, and the phone that would have been his focus fell from his hand and hit the cold, hard pavement with a clank.

As a member of the Verbena sub sect the Speelweavers Robin's main sphere was Prime instead of his tradition's usual one which where Life, and his secondary was Forces. Currently both Spheres where used to the full of the young mage's ability to try to kill Luke, Robin did not know where his rage came from, his Avatar saw the older mage as a threat, a danger to their union. The spoken challenge of a Core War had set the soul shard off like never before. All of the Traditions had their individual duel forms, some magickal others not. The Verbena went at one another with daggers, the Sons of Ether competed at making the best technomagickal effect, the list went on and on. The Virtual Adepts however had a particularly nasty form of dueling that most other magi detested, or at least though the Adepts where crazy for using, Core Wars. Once Awakened no mage could fathom life without magick, without their Avatar at their side as a a constant companion, and yet in a Core War the Adepts tied their very soul shards to computer programs and set them against one another like a bloody spiritual cockfight. Now granted permanent damage to any of the duelists where exceedingly rare, but the loser's Avatar was always wounded in the process. Off course a Core War had to be entered into willingly and both contestants had to be able to work the complex technomagick involved and Robin was neither, but even if his conscious mind knew that Luke's challenge had just been empty talk, his Avatar was in panic. Before Robin's eyes the young Virtual Adept on the ground changed, his face became feminine, plumper and his scared face took on an air of authority which it had not earlier possessed. The illusion only lasted for a heartbeat and Robin knew it was a throwback, a memory form his Avatar's earlier incarnation and a very traumatic one at that. Robin gasped and suddenly, as quickly as it come his Avatar's rage and fear was gone and the spirit retreated within him until it was just once more a presence deep down in the core of his being. Robin snapped back to consciousness, with horror and shock he realized that he had gotten this close to snapping the other mage's neck. Luke lay on the ground whimpering and nursing a broken arm, he could just as easily been dead, only luck had seen to it that the young Verbena's assault had not crushed more bones. Robin dropped his rotes and rushed to Luke's side.
«I...am...so...sorry man, I...I...do not know what came over me.»
Robin whispered, to much in shock to really know what to say. Luke only glared at the Verbena and tried to pull away from him.
«You are fucking crazy man! What kind of stunt was that, I challenged you to a duel you imbecile and you attack me like that...what the hell is wrong with you?»
Robin sigh, yes what was wrong with him? Somehow Luke's challenge had caused the Verbena's Avatar to see him as a threat, as someone who might separate them, the thought made Robin cold inside even the thought of loosing his Avatar probably scared him more than anything else in the world, perhaps with the exception of the Nephandi. What had happened to his former incarnation? Had someone hurt him, or her for that matter, it could be a her even if that was more unlikely, and who was that woman who's image the violent throwback had manifested over Luke's face? Robin shake his head, there was no time for these questions now, he had nearly killed another mage and he had to attend to Luke, if he was not arrested and thrown in some Quesitor's dungeon for this then there would be ample time for figuring out his Avatar's secrets later. Robin bent down to try to help the other mage to his feet, with several grunts of pain Luke managed to stand, still holding his broken arm protectively towards his chest.
«I do not know what is wrong with me Luke, all I can say is that I am sorry, I did not mean to hurt you, I think my Avatar freaked out for a moment and I just could not handle that.»
Luke sent the other mage a long, angry gaze before he spoke again.
«You need to have that Avatar checked out then before you kill someone you little freak!»
Robin sigh and offered his arm to support Luke's weight when the other mage appeared so unsteady on his feet that the Verbena was afraid he would fall to the ground again.
«You may be right, but listen we need to get you back to a Chantry. Mercury's Blood, the place I live is the closest, we have several good healers of my Tradition there they will take care of that arm as if it was nothing, and besides you can not wander the streets in this condition, if the mirror shades where to find you right now you would be in no condition to fight back or even run away, you need to come with me to where it is safe."
Luke grunted his displeasure but he nodded and limped along Robin as the young Verbena lead him towards his home Chantry.
«No I am not in a condition to fight right now, and who's fault is that? Now grab my phone and let us go, but do not for a second think that by helping me now I will not press charges for this at the next Tribunal!»

Part 3

Tiernan sigh as he dumped down in a large, old leather chair, it had been one hell of a night, Robin coming home with a wounded Virtual Adept was one thing, but learning that it was Robin himself who had harmed the other mage in the first place was quite a shock. What followed where hours on end trying to calm the situation down, Tiernan had been forced to pull in about every favor he had with the Adepts, and make all kinds of promises to get Luke and his more than livid mentor to not call for Quesitors to arrest Robin on the spot. The old Verbena glanced at the nearby sofa, a matching piece to the old brown chair he was currently sitting in, Robin slept now but he had been about as hard to calm down as Olivia Stern, Luke's spitfire of a mentor. Tiernan's young apprentice was not a violent man and knowing that he had hurt someone, even if the afflicted party would be all right with a bit of healing and a good night's sleep was not easy on him, and besides he was probably afraid of what his seemingly over protective Avatar would do in the future, how it would react if it ever felt threatened again. Robin was exhausted with regret and worry and Tiernan was glad that the young willworker was finally getting some rest.
«Can you tell me what is wrong with him Cita? I am at my wits end here.»
Tiernan muttered to the room's third occupant, a small, slender woman with dark blue eyes and short dark hair striped in blue. Few would have guessed that Cita Telar was a Master of the Art, the woman only looked a few years older than Robin, but Tiernan knew for a fact that the mage was well over eighty years old, young compared to himself but still far older than the fragile girl she appeared to be.
«I can do a deep scan of his Avatar and see what I find. When I scanned his Avatar before, right after you had made him your apprentice I found nothing out of the ordinary safe that it is a walk in and an odd lack of Paradox residues, but a deeper search might reveal more.»
Cita said and stretched towards the nearby table to pick up her colorful mug of steaming hot coffee that she took a sip from.
«Are you sure that is safe Cita? That you will not accidentally hurt him or anything?»
Tiernan said, suddenly worried for his apprentice's safety, granted Cita had as she mentioned examined the boy's Avatar once before but that had only been a surface scan, or whatever she wanted to call it, Virtual Adepts had such strange names for their magick.
«Believe it or not I do know what I am doing Ti.»
Cita said with a smile to take the edge out of her words as she put her coffee mug back down on the table.
«But to answer your question, yes it is completely safe, most likely Robin will not even feel what I am doing save that I am using magick, the scan can not harm him, it might however reveal a bit more about that mysterious Avatar of his, and why it is acting like some overprotective hen mother.»
Tiernan seamed to consider for a moment then he nodded, he sipped from his own mug, this one containing herbal tea.
«Then you have my consent, we need to know more before we have another incident on our hands, do it, the sooner the better.»

Cita wasted no time once she had Tiernan's blessing to examine Robin's Avatar, she slipped her laptop, an old and beat up thing that was her favorite foci, out of it's leather bag and put it on the table before her, moving the coffee mug away first so to not to risk spilling any on her computer equipment.
«This might actually be easier now that he is sleeping, his conscious mind might otherwise try to keep me out.»
Cita muttered absentmindedly as she prepared her equipment, since she was a Virtual Adept, a technomancer she needed the trapping of science to access her considerable magickal potential. Tiernan shook his head, he would never understand her kind, the woman's technological Paradigm was so far removed from the nature based magick he himself wielded he would never be able to wrap his mind around it.
«Is it difficult to do, this scan or whatever it was you called it?»
Tiernan asked and leaned back in his chair watching the other mage work. Cita shook her head as he plugged in her laptop's power supply and turned the machine on.
«No not difficult, but it is...complicated, especially with an Avatar like Robin's, I am pretty sure it was a Font in it's last incarnation and they are never easy to detect, they just stay there, deep inside of you silent and act as a conduit between their mages and the Quintessence pool, they are just plain hard to find, no offense intended to you off course Ti, I have nothing against Fonts, they are just hard to work with, that is all.»
Cita grumbled and Tiernan had to smile, yeah he knew very well what a Font was, for he possessed one himself. Long ago the Psychopomps matched mage and Avatar so perfectly that the soul shard did not need to communicate directly with it's host, and for a long time mages did not even know that the part of their spiritual anatomy that served as a conduit between them and the magickal energies they used in their craft where actually a self conscious entity living inside them, guiding them towards enlightenment. Eventually Paradox had forced the Psychopomps to leave abandoning Avatars to find their own hosts, creating imperfect joinings and forcing the soul shard to directly communicate with their mages, something that only ever happened before if the mage completely lost her way or was driven deep into Quiet. Tiernan was one of the last mages to be born with a Font and he had always regretted that he had never heard his Avatar speak, not once, it was just there deep inside him, giving him assess to Quintessence, a blessing beyond belief to be sure, but still he would have loved to hear it's voice like younger mages could.
«Are you sure Robin's Avatar is a Font, or was in it's last incarnation? I know you have said so before but it do speak with him, that is part of the problem, it sends him nightmares and whispers fearfully in his ear.»
Tiernan said and glanced at the elder Virtual Adept who now was done fiddling with her computer and had fixed Robin's sleeping form with an intent stare while her fingers danced over her laptop's keyboard, a small delicate clicking sound following each time a key where pressed down.
«Yes, just look at how clumsy it is in it's communications, Robin is this soul shard's first incarnation not arranged by the Psychopomps I am sure of it. Also you said he have described his dreams, that he sees something that could be an early Renaissance society? That would place his last incarnation before the Psychopomps left.»
Cita spoke as she worked but her mind was clearly more focused on what she was doing on her laptop than what she was saying. Every now and again the Spirit Master shifted her gaze from Robin to her computer screen and back again, her gaze intent and focused. Tiernan smiled he could feel Quintessence moving around his friend as the other mage begun to work her magick.
«Yeah well maybe Cita, but remember I was young in the early Renaissance, and let me tell you Robin's descriptions do not sound anything like what I remember, not that I saw every town in the world off course but what I mean is that there is no churches and, well it just do not seam to be that time period to me.»
Cita glanced up at the elder Verbena as he spoke then he shrugged.
«History is your thing Ti, Avatars are mine and I can only tell you what I see inside Robin, and this was definitively a Font, and since it never went though the Well of Souls but rather found a new host on it's own and walked into your apprentice as it where, I am pretty sure it have no idea how to be an Avatar, but let me concentrate for a minute my friend and I will see what else I can find out.»

Tiernan sat in silence for several minutes, sipping his tea every now and again as Cita worked her rote on Robin, the Virtual Adept's Paradigm where completely different from his own, she saw magick as information that could be changed and manipulated at will, while Tiernan himself saw the energies of nature that could be harnessed and woven like thread in a tapestry, however underneath it all, behind Paradigms and foci and personal belief both he and Cita worked with the same thing, Quintessence, the basic building block of reality, the primal essence of the universe itself. The cursed Technocracy called it enlightened science, the Celestial Chorus sang their magick forth as blessings from their Gods, and the Dreamspeakers communicated with dreams and spirits, but beyond all that it was just magick, they where all willworkers who through their Avatars could affect, channel and manipulate Quintessence, the rest was just flavorings, or perhaps not just flavorings, Tiernan would not have been able to work Cita's technomagick to save his life, and the blue eyed women who sat bent so intently over her computer got a look of confusion and disinterest on her face whenever he spoke of his natural energies and the forces of the Earth, at it's core magick might be the same, but while both Tiernan and Cita knew this on an intellectual level, neither mage where enlightened enough to let go of the illusion of their Paradigms, not even close.

«Okey I think I have something, Ti come here and I will show you what I got.»
Cita's voice pulled the Verbena Master out of his contemplations and the old mage stood and walked over to the younger willworker, then he lent over a bit so he could see the screen on her computer.
«Hum...what am I looking at Cita?»
Tiernan said and glanced at the image of a glowing spiral that seamed to go on forever despite being confined to a screen, comprised of what he believed to be computer code, or something to that effect.
«This is Robin's Avatar, well a representation of it I doubt it would show itself like this to him if he ever saw it, I mean with him being a Verbena Spellweaver and all, but anyway have look at this right here.»
Cita said and pointed at the screen, Tiernan just shook his head, the image flickering before him made absolutely no sense to him, and he actually studied Spirit even if he was nowhere near as proficient with that Sphere as the pretty, young looking Adept in the chair beside him.
«I am looking my friend but I have no idea what I am seeing, do you feel like explaining it, remember I do not exactly share your Paradigm.»
Cita giggled and nodded, in fact Verbena and Virtual Adepts where so far apart when it came to how they did their magick, and their general outlook on life that for the two of them to be friends where a minor miracle in itself.
«Sure Ti, now the first thing that is strange is this right here, this is Robin's Paradox buildup, I noted this the first time I scanned his Avatar as well, but I thought I would at least find something on a deeper scan, but there is no Paradox residues here, not from before he was born, it is as if his former incarnation never attracted as much as a sliver of it.»
Cita pointed at some glowing letters on the screen and Tiernan nodded as if he knew what the hell the other mage was talking about.
«Okey, why is that strange, granted I doubt many of us are Paradox free, but whoever had this Avatar before Robin could have been careful.»
The Virtual Adept Master shook her head.
«No it is not possible to be that careful, not if you are going to work magick at all, and even if he was born and lived and died like hundreds of years ago when Paradox was not so much of a threat, there would be something. Dox do not carry over from earlier lives normally, but it's residue do, and there is just nothing here, zero, zip, nada, the only Dox I find in Robin is what he have accumulated in this lifetime, his former life never experienced Paradox, not once.»
Tiernan raised an eyebrow and leaned in closer to look at Cita's screen as if doing so would somehow make the whole thing more understandable.
«So you are saying that the last time Robin's Avatar was incarnated was centuries ago when Paradox was not yet such a strong force?»
The Verbena Master finally asked as he gave up on making sense of the gibberish displayed on Cita's computer screen.
«You are not listening to me Ti, I said no Paradox, not to little of it to be from the modern era. Robin's former life did not experience Paradox at all it would have to be very far back, far longer than the Renaissance. I mean Paradox have been with us for thousands of years, even if his last life was during the dark ages, there would be some Dox residues here, not much but some, and like I said there is nothing, I can not stress that enough, nothing...however while I did not find any Paradox I did find something else puzzling, well more worrying actually.»
Tiernan glanced at the younger mage and raised an eyebrow again.
«More mysteries huh?»
Cita nodded and her fingers danced over her keyboard to bring up another section of the scan.
«Yeah and a troubling one this time, I said worrying and I meant it...you see these darker segments here, yeah that is resonance.»
Tiernan straightened, standing bent over Cita's chair like that as she explained was giving him a backache, hell he was getting to old for this, Marcus Tiernan might look to be in his mid thirties somewhere but he had been born in 1418 so he would allow himself the luxury of soothing aching joints, after all he was pretty spry for a nearly six hundred year old man.
«And so, we are mages Cita we build up resonance and if this is just residues left in Robin's Avatar from a former life then it is not like it can hurt him...can it?»
Tiernan said and glanced down at the computer screen from where he now stood behind the Virtual Adept's chair. Cita did not answer at first, she took a sip from her now cold coffee and grimaced at the taste.
«It is just residue yes, most irregularities like this get cleansed when an Avatar incarnates into a new host, however from these readings there was allot of it Ti, and not just any resonance my friend, whoever was host to this Avatar before Robin had build up a fair deal of J'hor.»

Tiernan blinked, it took him a few moments to process what Cita had just said. J'hor, the death taint, the most fared of all resonances, whole Chantries moved if their nodes became corrupted to avoid it's touch and the death mystics of the Euthanatos Tradition willingly murdered their own when their often dark magick lead to a build up of the dreaded resonance before it could drive the mystic to commit unspeakable acts. Resonance was both a boon and a bane to mages, just like the willworkers changed reality with their magick, they where affected in return. Quintessence, the source of all magick could be flavored, it could happen for many reason, the Quintessence flow in a children's hospital might be soothing and healing, while at the site of an old battle it would be violent, bubbling and eager for a fight. Mages put resonance into three categories, dynamic, static and entropic. Dynamic resonance was forever changing, it was warm and creating, but also dangerous, violent and spontaneous, static resonance was like ice, ever preserving, ever stagnant, and then there where entropic resonance, strange, old and primordial, the essence of life and death, of chance and fate. In working magick it was almost impossible not to attract resonance, and in many ways it could be helpful, a healing dynamic resonance could make a willworker more proficient with curing spells, the cold, stable effects of stasis could make an artificer more successful, and the rage filled resonance of war could make battle magick easier to cast, but useful as it was, resonance had to be balanced for even as it affected a willworker's magick, it also affected their body and minds and to much resonance could drive a mage into Quiet, the wizard's insanity, just as easily as Paradox could, and in fact what resonance an insane willworker had in their system affected how their Quiets would play out, how they would loose touch with reality. Tiernan tapped a long thin finger to the side of his nose, a habit he had when thinking, J'hor was entropic resonance, but it was concentrated from the darker aspects of entropy, it was the essence of death, decay and destruction and there could be no benefit to a mage in attracting such energies, it would only lead to insanity and death, luckily attracting J'hor was not that easy, only the darkest of magick was likely to generate such resonance, that and working with corrupted Quintessence but none in their right mind would do that.
«How, I mean why is there traces of J'hor in my apprentice's Avatar, are you saying that he was an Euthanatos once or perhaps a necromancer?»
Tiernan asked and turned his attention back to Cita, the younger mage answered by pressing a few keys on her computer bringing a new section of her scan into focus.
«I have no idea, he is not a widderslainte so you do not need to worry about that, and the residue is to weak to harm him, like I said an Avatar shed such things when they enter a new incarnation, even a walk in like this one do that, but Robin's former life, he would have been good on the way to going Marauder and in the most nasty of ways at that.»
Tiernan sat down on the armrest of Cita's chair and glanced at her computer again, he did not understand the symbols there, but the picture the Adept drew with her explanations where beginning to seriously worry him.
«Could this be why Robin's Avatar act the way it do?»
The elder technomancer got a doubtful look in her eyes.
«No I do not think so, this resonance might have given Robin's former incarnation an unpleasant death eventually but no, this Avatar is afraid of something but it is not resonance, give me a moment and I will do one more scan and see what else will show up, but for now I am stumped, I have no idea why this Avatar is so protective, granted to much resonance in an earlier incarnation could have affected it's judgment, but it just do not add up, like I said this Avatar is protective not destructive, it is all a big mystery really.»

Cita hardly heard what Tiernan might have answered her as she concentrated on the glowing numbers and letters on the screen, there had to be something here! The young sleeping Verbena had what appeared like a strong, healthy Avatar, sure there where some strange residues in it but that should not be enough to make it go haywire like that. Cita pressed enter and performed another scan, a deep one this time, Robin stirred on the sofa, a soft whimper escaped his lips but he did not wake, Cita sigh, these scans should not hurt him, the young mage should not even be able to feel her working on him, but his Avatar knew what she was doing, and it was alert, nervous and rather aggressive, she had to step lightly or she might trigger it's rage again.
«Come on my little friend, show me your secrets, do you not realize that I am only trying to help you?»
Cita muttered to no one in particular, she doubted the young Spellweaver's Avatar could hear her, very few of them paid any heed to others than their own host...or perhaps it did hear for suddenly the Avatar shifted, well perhaps shifted might not be the right word, but it moved and the readout on Cita's screen changed as well, the soul shard also seamed a bit less on edge, perhaps it had realized that the woman examining it meant no harm.
«Hum...perhaps you are trying to show me something.»
Cita cooed as she watched her screen, and suddenly there it was, the explanation for it all, clear as day and terrible in it's revelation. Cita heard herself gasp and she tore her eyes away from the computer screen to look up at Tiernan with an expression of absolute dread etched into her pretty features.
«He was put through Gilgul Tiernan, a lesser one of course or there would have been nothing to reincarnate, but Gilgul non the less, look at this scar here near where Robin's Avatar connects to his being, your apprentice's forcer incarnation had his Avatar cut out of him! There is no wonder the poor thing is protective of it's host, when Luke Harries challenged your apprentice to a Core War this soul shard must have remembered in full being removed from it's former host and it did the only thing it could, it attacked.»
Cita fumbled for her coffee cup and drank the last of the cold, bitter liquid in one gulp, she did not even care that the drink had gone stale as her throat had become completely dry, Gilgul, the deliberate destruction or removal of a mage's Avatar, nothing filled her with greater fear and from the look of horror on Tiernan's face he felt the same, off course he did, all mages feared loosing their magickal powers, their Avatars, the little piece of wonder that had seen fit to bless them. Few magi survived such a loss, and those that did lived miserable existences filed with pain and regret, the Hermetic who had once said, a mage's spells are his life, had been very right about that. Gilgul would end magick, it would end enlightened understanding leaving the world dull and gray for one who had seen past the veil of the consensus and seen the wonders of the world beyond. To go back to the perceptions and limited view of a sleeper would feel like loosing all ones senses at once, and perhaps worst of all, Gilgul would end the journey towards Ascension leaving the former mage broken and without hope or purpose, nothing could be more terrible.
«A...are you sure?»
Tiernan said, he looked at where Cita now pointed on the computer screen and even the elder Verbena with his naturalistic Paradigm saw the dark scar line among the swirling symbols that represented Robin's Avatar, the Virtual Adept nodded.
«I am quite sure, reincarnation have healed the soul shard, but this scar is so massive, it would have split the Avatar completely from it's host.»
Tiernan's eyes where wide, he was leaning over the computer again now, staring that that dark line, contemplating what horror his apprentice's former incarnation must have felt before his death.
«Could it have been an accident Cita, I mean a wound like this could be the result of a death rote or magick getting completely out of hand?»
The dark haired technomancer shook her head.
«No, you forget that I am a spirit healer Ti, I see wounded Avatars all the time and an accident do not look like this, trust me on that. Look at the scar, no this was deliberate the cut is to precise to be an accident, also not only was this done deliberate, I doubt it was done during a fight, this Avatar is very powerful, to cut it from it's host in such a precise way the victim would have to be controlled in some manner and I do not think that one mage did this alone, it was probably with a group acting in concert, which lead me to think this was done as a punishment of some sort with the victim's magick kept subdued during the process.»
Tiernan glanced down at Cita, he still had that horrified look in his eyes, and her theories did not exactly ease his mind to say the least.
«Now that is a chilling thought, do you think we did it? The Traditions I mean?»
Cita hesitated in answering the question, she busied herself with ending her rote and closing down her computer, finally she said.
«It could be, I heave heard of lesser Gilgul's being used on a few, rare occasions where the judges want to make sure the defendant never uses magick again but without going to the drastic step of completely destroying his or her Avatar, however most of the time such a thing would be considered to cruel, either the Avatar itself is a threat and it completely vanquished or it is not touched.»
Tiernan stood and paced back and forth on the carpeted floor for a while, gathering his thoughts before he spoke again.
«Hum..well do it matter? This scar, it will not affect Robin will it? It is just a throwback to his former incarnation, and now that we know why his Avatar is so aggressive can't you talk with it? Get it to understand that it is safe now?»
Cita shrugged as she put her computer back into it's old leather messenger bag and made sure it was secured properly before answering the older mage's question.
«I can try but generally it do not work like that Ti, I can not get Robin's Avatar to do anything, only he can do that, and I need more details, if we can present Robin with a detailed account of what happened to his former incarnation then he can go into a Seeking and work it out with his soul shard, but remember Tiernan, the mage host is not the only one that suffers if a Avatar is taken from it's willworker before death separates them naturally. Sure the former mage will give up on life and waste away, but the Avatar will be left completely confused and traumatized as well. Avatars incarnate in us so that they can experience the world, we live in a symbiosis with them, Avatar and host, they give us magick and allow us to see beyond what mortal eyes can witness, and we give them a vessel in which to interact with the world, if an Avatar looses that vessel they would be completely lost it would be a terrifying experience for them. Now Robin's Avatar is a walk in, most likely we now know the reason for that. With a lesser Gilgul the severed Avatar will in most cases stay within it's host's body until the former mage dies, but without the connection to a living being they might get lost on their way to the well of souls, this Avatar have probably wandered the Tellurian looking for a new host until it found Robin, it have been scared and alone for who knows how long, and now it is hellbent on not loosing another host before it's time. This soul shard needs more than a few comforting words from me to screw it's head on straight, well providing that it have a head that is. Now if it had found it's way to the Well then things would have been different, it would have shed it's former life more completely, dealt with the issues and tribulations of that life before it was reborn into a new host, but it did not, the memory of loosing it's mage is completely fresh in this walk in's psyche, and only Robin, armed with the full knowledge of what happened to his former incarnation have any hope of helping it.»

Tiernan sigh, it was never easy. The old mage walked over to the sofa where his apprentice slept and looked down at the dark haired boy. Cita sat watching the pair of them, teacher and apprentice for a while before speaking.
«We need to find out more Tiernan, or the incidents with Robin's Avatar will continue and who knows what will happen the next time that soul shard have a panic attack. Now I will speak with my contacts on Horizon, I will see if I can get a list over everyone who have been put though a lesser Gilgul and who also where old enough to have had a Font and see if I can find a match, if Robin's former incarnation was punished by the Traditions Horizon should have a note of it in the records, however if it happened before the Traditions formed, or if another faction did it then we will not get anywhere with that line of inquiry.»
Tiernan nodded as he bent down to cover his sleeping apprentice with a blanket, a look of protective pride, like a parent tending to his child, glowing in his deep set, wise old eyes.
«You think another faction could have done it?»
Cita considered the old Verbena's question then she shook her head and stood to stretch her legs, even when standing at her full high the top of the small woman's head only reached Tiernan to the chest.
«No, I do not think so, but it is a possibility, the Technocracy have the means but they seldom go after Avatars preferring to just kill mages outright, or send us into slave labor, the Iteration X feed Avatars to that Computer spirit of theirs, but then the whole Avatar would be gone, so no, I doubt it was them. It could not have been the Marauders, that scar was to even and controlled to have been done by the Mad Ones, the Nephandi...well they are a possibility, they could have done such a thing just because it was fun.»
Cita shuddered, she did not like to think about the Fallen ones, mages who willingly served the Outsider things and the Majin Incarna, the things that wanted to rip the tapestry asunder and destroy creation itself the Nephandi was perhaps the most dangerous and hated faction in the entire Ascension War.
«And that leaves the Crafts and Orphan groups and as far as I know none of them even know how to do Gilgul, and even if they did they would have no motivation to do so, it is easier just to kill an offending mage.»
Tiernan shrugged, he finished doting over his apprentice and found a chair to sit down in.
«Perhaps that the J'hor you found traces of could have something to do with it, some might think that to eliminate someone who was in danger of being lost in a J'hor Quiet's magickal abilities would be the only way to stay safe, and they might be right about that, a powerful mage in Quiet, especially a destructive one like you would get with J'hor would a terrible danger to everyone in the vicinity, you have seen Marauders, you know what damage an insane mage can do.»
Cita nodded, she stretched tired joints and yawned, it was getting late and the magick she had done on Robin had been demanding. Avatars liked to stay deep down into the core of their hosts, finding them could be complicated work, and especially one as elusive as the one this young Verbena was blessed with..
«It could be, but then they have a cruel way to stop someone from going Marauder I must say. I would have preferred to take a bullet to the head rather than face Gilgul. However I do not think we will figure this out tonight, we are both tired Ti, we should get some sleep and then I will start work on getting that list tomorrow and we will see where it will leads.»
Tiernan nodded his consent, he stood to hold the door open for Cita as she left the small sitting room.
«I agree my friend and thank you for your help. Please forgive me for keeping you up so late. I think I will sit here a little while longer, perhaps have a drink then I will retire as well. I will see you in the morning.»
Cita gave her friend an encouraging smile and with her computer bag in hand she walked towards the stairs that would take her to her quarters and more importantly, to her bed.
«No problem Ti, I am glad to help in any way I can, and do not worry my friend, we will figure this out, one way or the other.»

Part 4

Two weeks later Cita sat bent over a printed out list of names, with a red marking pen she crossed out everyone who just where not candidates to be Robin St'Martin's former incarnation. Most Avatars choose a new host of the same gender as the former so every female name was crossed off the list already, that might be premature though as Cita herself was pretty sure that one of her own former incarnations had been a man, but with Robin she just got that feeling from his Avatar that it was masculine and always would be.
«What about this one. Juan Mendez, he was born in 1352, well before the last of the Psychopomps left our world. It say here he was put through a lesser Gilgul in 1806 for attacking another mage's Avatar and badly wounding it.»
Tiernan commented from where he sat on a chair beside the dark haired technomancer and peered at the papers in her hand before pointing at one name on the list of ill fated mages, Cita shook her head.
«No it can not be him, it says here that his Avatar was branded for another crime a few years before the Gilgul, there are no trace of such a mark on Robin's soul shard.»
Tiernan nodded, that was one more candidate to cross off from the list, his eyes scanned the page, most of those mentioned here where either to young, they had the wrong Essence or in other ways did not fit.
«And this one Thomas Malm, his Avatar had a questing essence the same as Robin, and he was born right after the Order of Hermes was founded so he is definitely old enough to have had a Font.»
Cita gave a grin and shook her head again.
«Yeah save that I know Thomas Malm's reincarnation, his Avatar live in a charming young Cultist of Extasy named Justin Silversmith now.»
Tiernan sigh took the pages containing the thankfully short list out of Cita's hand and studied it more closely, there where not that many possibilities left that had not been crossed out by the elder technomancer's red marker.
«And him here, he would be perfect a perfect candidate given a the lesser Gilgul was performed on him only two years before Robin's birth..»
Cita peeked at the list curiously, she had received it this morning after two weeks of struggling with Horizon's red tape and bureaucracy, finally she had to call in a favor with the Virtual Adept Primus, Roger Thackery himself, it was a good thing she had a high standing among her Tradition, to get the information she needed.
«Who? Show me.»
Tiernan pointed to a name, a mage named Connor Blackhill, and yes the man would appear to fit, he had been born before the Psychopomps left Earth, his Avatar was of the questing essence, everything fit, but again Cita shook her head.
«Connor was the first one that caught my eye so I did a bit of digging, apparently he was in the habit of doing ridiculously vulgar magick in public, not that unusual for a member of House Flambeau but apparently Connor here took it to the extreme. Mr Blackhill here got a few warnings from the Quesitors to be more careful, but apparently he did not heed them for he continued using vulgar magick until he attracted enough Paradox to end up in one nasty Quiet and then when he came to his senses again he found that he had completely destroyed his Chantry, reduced it and everyone living there to ash.»
Cita explained and Tiernan nodded in recognition.
«I remember that case, it caused quite a uproar some eighteen years ago or so, but Connor Blackhill was sentenced to death for the destruction of his own Chantry was he not, why is his name on this list?»
Cita folded her hands in her lap and leaned back in her chair before answering.
«When Connor got the death sentence he begged the Quesitors for some way to redeem himself, the man was beside himself with grief and horror over what he had done and he wanted to serve the Traditions in some way to ease his guilt, so the Quesitors made him an offer of an alternative, lesser Gilgul and then becoming an Mercere, Connor accepted.»
Tiernan shuddered and Cita felt rather queasy about it herself. House Mercere was one of the Order of Hermes Tradition's factions, but when the House's founder had lost his ability to work magick in a laboratory accident he had found meaning in serving the newly established Order in another fashion, as a courier, and his House followed in their founder's footsteps. Some Mercere where full mages, but they often took in the unfortunate ones who had lost their magickal abilities and gave those few who survived a purpose, with the Technocracy having it's fingers in about every technological market the Traditions needed reliable couriers to carry messages back and fourth between various mages and Chantries so House Mercere's services where highly requested and appreciated. Most of House Mercere was made up of those who had never been Awakened but who showed a knack for the artifacts the House employed, most members of House Mercere could not work magick themselves but they where experts with talismans, using the artifacts to at times even rival the power of their fully awakened colleagues. Connor Blackhill had made a noble sacrifice to serve as a courier to make up for his crime, Cita found she admired the man his courage, but she did not think she could have done the same, she would have rather died than go though life without magick.
«Anyway Connor Blackhill is still with House Mercere, I even spoke with him on the phone.»
Cita muttered and Tiernan looked at her with shock in his dark eyes.
«He is still alive?»
The Viritual Adept nodded.
«For some definition of the term alive, yes he is, and more importantly his Avatar is still at his side, not attatched anymore, but there so Connor can not be Robin's former incarnation.»
Tirenan sigh and throws the printed out list back onto the table.
«This is going nowhere, none of these names fit.»
Cita lent over the table and rested her head on her hand, the elder Verbena was right, this was indeed going nowhere.
«No I have come to that same conclusion as well, which means whatever happened to Robin's Avatar it is unlikely the Traditions did it, it can have been done in some Chantry somewhere without sanction from the Council off course, there would be no way to know if that where the case, though most have the good sense to leave Avatars alone, or it could have been done before the Traditions formed, but in that case we are looking for a needle in a heystack.»
Tirenan stood, he had gotten a thoughtful look in his eyes as he walked to a nearby cabinet and begun to mix himself a drink.
«Are you sure it happened here Cita, and by here I mean in this realm?»
Cita looked curiously up at Tirenan.
«Well most of the unfortunates on this list had their Avatars ripped out of them at Horizon Ti, so no I do not think it happened at Earth, what is your point?»
The elder Verbena turned towards his friend and gesticulated whith his glass now filled with fine, golden brandy.
«I was thinking a little further away than that Cita, you say there was no residual Paradox in Robin's Avatar, just what he have attracted in this incarnation, that got me thinking, well that combined with the dreams my apprentice have told me about, and the descriptions he makes of the Renaissance village without a church, are you sure Robin's Avatar belong in this Well of Souls, perhaps in it's confusion it can have come from another realm entierly, is that a possiblity?»
Cita sat up streighter in her chair and nodded.
«I had not considered that option Ti, but when I hear you say it, that would make sense and it would explain some of the mysteries surounding this Avatar, we know some other realms have Awakened mages, and not all of them are plagued with Paradox like we are, you are right Robin's Avatar could have come fom one of them.»
Tirenann grinned, perhaps they where finally getting somewhere, though in reality they had just gone from a needle in a heystack situation to looking for a drop of water in the ocean, there was an infinite nummber or worls and realms in the Tellurian across the great abyss of the deep Umbra, how would they find the right one if Robin's Avatar had indeed come fom another reality? The task of tracking down the fate of the young mage's former incarnation might just have gotten more complicated, but at least reaching the realization that they might have to look to another world for answers where a place to start.
«If Robin's Avatar is from another world, can you localize it Cita.»
Tirenan asked and the Virtual Adept looked thoughtful for a moment, raising her head form her hand and tapping a finger absentmindedly to her lower lip as she considered.
«Myabe, it would not be an easy task, but give me a few days and I will see what I can do, and if I do not have the magick to do it, perhaps someone I know will. If Robin's Avatar is from another realm, then we will find it, the question is only how dangerous that realm will be and if we will be able to get an answer to our question there, the answer to the question of what in the world happened to Robin St'Martin's Avatar.»