Psionic Love
Darkness. Silence. In limbo, a state of free floating weightlessness.
-Pop. Gurgle. Scworp-
Sound, light. Murky haze through flowing liquid.
"...hel..."
Voice.
"... help..."
Voice.
"Someone... HELP!"
Reply.
"Be still, little one. Your struggles will be fruitless."
"Who... who are you? Who am I?"
"You are Kerrigan. You are a member of the weak, primitive race we call 'humans'."
"My name. I... I remember it. And I'm human... but I'm not weak. We're not weak! Who are you? Answer!"
"I am the creator. Or more precisely, the re-maker. I am reinventing your form, making you more powerful then you ever thought you could be."
"You're... you're God?"
"In a sense, although that is a human word. Your God is a spiritual being; ethereal, untouchable beyond the state of your own mind. I am very much real, yet I can perform acts just as he could. In a sense; I am greater then your God."
"You lie."
"You deny. You do not yet know my power. In time, you will. In time, you will call me 'master'."
"Never! I would never give in too you! Let me free! Let me-"
Jim opened his eyes with a start. Something had woken him. A noise; the gentle 'kssh' of his quarter's automatic door sliding open and shut again. He lay still, waiting for the post-dream sluggishness to seep from his mind. He sensed something was different. Weight; his mattress had sunken lower. Something was sitting on the side of his bed.
He opened his mouth to speak, but a hand clamped itself firmly over his mouth. He struggled, inaudible mumbles spewing from behind the smothering fingers. Then she spoke.
"Shhh... Jimmy, be still. It's me, Sarah." Her voice was soft, soothing. It did not portray the firmness with which she had forced her hand upon him.
Jim Raynor stopped struggling and stared blankly into the darkness. He wondered why she had not yet removed her hand.
"Because I do not want you to speak. I have questions to ask, and things to tell you. For now, I would prefer to just read your thoughts. They are more honest then a mouth could ever be."
Jim relaxed. He no longer felt in danger, but Kerrigan's words were disturbing him. They had never been this close before. It was a new experience.
"For me too, heh." Her voice suggested she was smiling. When she spoke again, the tone was low and quavery.
"Jimmy... Arcturus just vid-commed me. The Protoss are converging on Tarsonis. They seem hell bent on wiping the Zerg from the planet like they did with Mar Sara. If we don't stop them, everything we've worked for will be destroyed. The Confederates will escape and reform on another planet. We'll never be free from their tyrannical clutches."
She paused. Jim could feel her hand trembling against his lips.
'Is that why you came here? To say goodbye?'
"In... a way. No doubt you'll take this up with Arcturus first vid-conference we have. I know you don't trust him, and I know you..." Again she paused.
'What?'
"I know you... care for me. I know, even without reading your mind. I've watched the way you act around me." She shifted on the side of his bed and gave a short laugh.
"Hah, do you remember the first thought you had when you first laid eyes on me?"
They went silent as the same line crossed their minds together. Jimmy couldn't help smiling as he thought about it, before they both shared Kerrigan's reply:
"You pig!"
Kerrigan didn't say anything for awhile. Jimmy could feel her eyes on him in the dark. Her hand began to tremble again.
"But you're right. That isn't the only reason I came here. Before Arcturus woke me, I was... I was dreaming. In it, I couldn't move. I was suspended, all my senses dulled. It felt so unbelievably real. I was grateful to be awake-"
"That... that dream. That's what this is! This isn't real!"
"Your memories are fascinating, little one. They hold many things dear to you in your life. They give you purpose, a will to succeed at any cost. But these memories will serve a different purpose upon your rebirth."
"What do you mean?"
"Revealing that to you now would be... detrimental to your growth."
"I don't believe you. I won't. This isn't real. I merely have to wake up. Jimmy will-"
"That human is inconsequential. He will not help you. Give in to your fate"
"He will. He promised. He-"
'Are you worried about the dream? Do you think it means something?'
"I don't know Jimmy. I've never fully understood my own mind. The Confederates trained me to control my emotions, harness my thoughts and focus on the tasks at hand. But they've never told me what I may be capable of. Sometimes I have... flashes."
She seemed to grow agitated; Jim could hear the fingers of her free hand toying with lace on her night clothing.
"I see things before they happen," she said softly. "Not often... but when I do, it's rarely uneventful. The Confederates said it was the side affect of performance enhancement drugs. Arcturus... never really discussed it. It seemed like he wanted to avoid the topic altogether."
Her speech was interrupted by a short sniffle.
"Yes," she continued. "I am worried about the dream. Darkness, silence. Drifting in limbo. I just felt... so helpless."
Jim heard her turn her face away. A drop of wetness fell on his bare arm. She was crying. He sat up, and her hand fell unresisting from his face.
"Kerrigan... Sarah. What's wrong? You can tell me. I'm... I'm here for you."
Kerrigan sat motionless, sniffing in the dark. Jim reached down to touch her hand. She snapped out of it with a start, and pushed him forcefully back onto the bed. She pinned his hands above his head and hovered over him, visible only as a silhouette in the gloom. He could hear her quivering breaths.
With a sigh, she released him, and collapsed onto his chest. She moved so that her head rested underneath his chin, and relaxed. Jim wasn't sure what to do.
She was obviously disturbed. Scared. Maybe both. He'd never spent much time with women before, let alone distressed ones. Should he comfort her? Say nothing? Offer his-
She laughed softly.
"Jimmy, stop thinking. Your mind's racing faster then your heart. I just want to stay here for awhile. Safe."
Jim closed his eyes and allowed himself to relax. Concentrated on the things he could sense, since his vision was obscured in the darkness.
Her hair. So close to his face. It had an aroma of its own. Indescribable and comforting. The soft, rhythmic breaths escaping from her lips. The feel of her skin against his tanned and weather beaten arm. Her own heart, positioned somewhere over his left side, beat evenly with his. A dull pendulum, ticking back and forth. His mind was beginning to wander, slip back into the unreality of dream. It was a struggle to remain focused.
"Jimmy, I want you to promise me something."
Kerrigans words sparked new life behind his eye lids.
"Promise? Anything. I'll do anything for you."
"I have a dreadful feeling that this mission will be a last. A last for everything. Last time I'll serve under Arcturus. Last time I'll risk my life for mankind." He felt her head lift and her eyes upon his face. "Last time I'll see you."
Raynor stared back in the night, waiting for what she'd say next.
"Promise you'll come find me."
"Come find you? Why? Where will you be?"
"I don't know. I don't even know if I'll be of this world. Perhaps my encounter with the Protoss will be the end of my life. Just promise me."
Jim was silent. Thoughtless. She shifted so her face was closer to his.
"Jim? Will you?"
Again he didn't respond. He could feel her eyes scanning him. Then, ever so lightly, he felt invisible hands inside his mind. Soft fingertips clawing through his brain, parting emotions and memories, searching for the answer.
He shook his head.
"Don't. Please, don't do that. I can tell you myself." He took a breath. "I'll find you, Sarah. Wherever you might be. I'll travel across the known universe if I have to. I promise: I'll find you."
"You fool yourself, little one. Seeking sanctuary within false hope will only delay your ascension."
"He promised. It was genuine. I felt it in his mind. In his voice. He'll come find me."
"Little one..."
"What? Why do you persist in this torment?"
"... You do not know what you are, do you little one? You do not know who made you?"
"What do you mean? My parents. I am a product of love."
"You are, but you are so much more then that. You've been an experiment for more years then you can remember."
"..."
"Upon Mar Sara, my hive ambushed a human transport as it was evacuating the planet. Within it was a human very highly regarded by your race. He had knowledge of a great many things. When he was assimilated into my brood, I too gained that knowledge. I learned of your life."
"What... what do you know?"
"Your parents were murdered. Members of the Confederate Ghost Program were notified by hospital staff the night you were born. They said they had a child of unusual psionic abilities."
"They... told me I was taken from my parents because of population regulations. They already had another child, it was against the law too-"
"You have been lied to. Confederate Ghosts stormed the hospital and slaughtered everyone who bore witness to your existence. You mother was shot in her bed, still holding you in her arms. Your father followed shortly after, when he brutally attacked a Ghost with a surgical scalpel. They slit his throat from ear to ear and left him to drown in his own blood."
"How... Why? WHY? Why did they do it? My parents would have posed no threat to them."
"Knowledge is power, little one."
"... I was forced to work for the Confederacy for years. Doing their dirty work, being subjected to countless tests. Arcturus rescued me. He saved me. He was the only one that truly cared."
"And what did he do after your gallant rescue from the scientists at that Terran outpost?"
"He told me the truth. How our lives had been ruined by the actions of the Confederacy. He said how alike we were... how we fought for a common cause now."
"And how did he fight?"
"He... he made me execute Confederates. Politicians, generals, high-ranking medical officers... anything to help bring upon their downfall. It was for the greater good-"
"He made you an Assassin. Arcturus used you for the same means as the Confederates did. Same job, different sides. Little one, you must understand the workings of a primitive mind like the one you humans share. He never cared about you, he was securing his own political gain."
"He saved me."
"He damned you. Look around you, little one. If you can. Where do you think you are? How do you think you got here?"
"I... don't know. I can't... I can't remember."
"Arcturus abandoned you. He left you on that orbital platform, left you at my mercy. Like every political tool; once it has served its purpose, it's outlived its usefulness."
"I... I..."
Time passed. They both lay unmoving. Jim drifted in and out of sleep, awoken by Kerrigan's movements beside him, or an occasional sigh. Her arm was draped across the length of his chest, hugging him close. He could feel her heart against his shoulder.
Suddenly, an alien sound filled his ears. A blinking red light lit the room in an eerie glow. Kerrigan sat up with a start and flicked a switch on her wrist band.
For the first time that night, Raynor saw her face.
In the soft blue glow of a mini-tech holo-screen, he watched, mesmerized, as her eyes scanned the message. He couldn't help but admire her perfectly smooth skin, tinted silver by the light. The delicate pout of her lips, moving slightly as she mouthed words to herself. And the way that single strand of hair drooped down in front of her eyes, causing her to brush it back with a hand, only for it to return seconds later.
Kerrigan stopped reading her message, and looked up into his eyes.
"You're pretty observant for a guy, you know."
They smiled together, locked in unblinking gaze. Finally she broke the contact.
"It's time. Arcturus has requested the immediate presence of all previously briefed soldiers. We're shipping out in two hours."
Jim knew the concern on his face was clearly visible. He found himself lifting his hand to touch her face.
"Sarah... you don't have to-"
"Yes. Yes, I do. And you know it. Arcturus doesn't accept excuses." She placed her hand over his and pressed it to her cheek.
"Be careful," he said, trying to hold back wave of emotions assailing him. Anger at Arcturus for sending her on such a foolhardy mission. Fear that she might fall victim to the Zerg. But looking at her face, all those feelings melted away. All he felt was...
She smiled and brought his hand to her lips, kissing his rough, worn knuckles.
"I will." Kerrigan moved forward so she was a mere nose length away from his face. "Remember your promise, Jimmy." She leaned in closer.
Jim felt his lips quiver with nervous anticipation.
"I will. I will find you."
He leaned in too, closing his eyes.
And suddenly she was gone. The bed bounced back as the extra weight disappeared. Jim sat upright, staring into pitch black. The soft 'kssh' of his quarter's automatic door drew his attention. A thin, shapely silhouette stood within the space.
"Goobye, Jimmy." The voice sounded faint and ghostly. He felt the words in his mind, more then heard them being said.
He blinked, and the figure had dissolved into the night.
"Goodbye, Sarah."
Darkness. Silence. In limbo, a state of free floating weightlessness.
-Pop. Gurgle. Scworp-
Sound, light. Murky haze through flowing liquid.
"...I..."
Voice.
"...I...I can't..."
Reply.
"You can. And you will. The first step towards ascension is admitting the things you know you've been denying."
"But it's so painful..."
"I know, little one. It always is. The Confederacy destroyed your family. They introduced you to death at an early age, made you cold, emotionless. You learned to obey, follow blindly and unquestionably. Then when you were saved by your would-be 'angel', he sent you right back to the same thing, just under the banner of a different cause. And the male... the one you hold emotions for even now-"
"Don't. Please."
"He has broken his promise. He will not come to find you. You are a casualty of an already forgotten battle. Your race disowns you."
Darkness. Silence. Limbo.
-Pop. Gurgle. Scworp-
"What do you offer me?"
"Freedom. Power. Revenge. The chance to rule. All these things can be yours."
"And in return?"
"Stop resisting. Embrace your fate. Abandon your foolish hopes. And call me master."
"... You say you're greater then God? Can you even comprehend what you're asking me to do? Please, just leave me alone. You've given me too many things to think about. "
"I understand, little one, I shall leave you be. Rest now; there is much in store for you."
Silence. Limbo. Seclusion.
-Pop. Gurgle. Scworp-
Voice
"..."
Voice.
"...Jimmy..."