Promises

Disclaimer: I do not own Dino Crisis or any of the characters.

Summary: She had made Dylan a promise. Gail had taught her to never promise a survivor anything.

A/N: Takes place after DC2.

000

It ate at her. Not on the outside where people could see but on the inside where she could really feel it. It was eating her from the inside out and Rick was beginning to notice. He wasn't asking questions outright quite yet but she knew he'd eventually work his way up to verbally confronting her.

She hadn't slacked off or anything, she was too professional for that. It was the little things really; her hair was getting a tad too long, she was a bit too thin, skin too pale.

It had started with little looks here and there, a concerned word or two, an inquiry after her health but recently he'd grown bold. He'd begun bringing her lunch upon noticing her tendency to skip meals, offering to cover her paperwork so she could leave early and get some sleep. Sometimes she even felt like he was following her.

Gail was starting to catch on as well. Whether he'd noticed her despair between briefings and meetings or Rick had been desperate enough to voluntarily converse with the older man about her welfare she wasn't sure. Either was a possibility, really. Rick seemed to be reaching for straws to bring her mind back from that unfortunate city stuck in the prehistoric era with its doomed inhabitants but, then again, Gail was eerily perceptive underneath his ever present mask of indifference.

She was sure that her time spent comparing Kirk's Third Energy data to the disc retrieved from Edward City hadn't gone unnoticed seeing as how that was classified information; Third Energy was dangerous and both discs had been kept under lock and key since they'd been checked in. Only S.O.R.T. agents with a certain clearance level were permitted to access it and she was sure her repeated requests for entrance were suspicious, if not frowned upon.

Then there were those visits to Edward Kirk's holding lab. Seems intelligence is the government's currency and his smarts and know-how had gotten him out of doing hard time but, in exchange, he had to do their bidding in a private, secure lab. Technically he wasn't allowed to discuss Third Energy but Regina was a respected agent and no one questioned her when she sought an audience with him alone.

Her behavior begged strange, she'd admit but she'd kept up her duties and did her job to the best of her abilities. She gave a hundred and ten percent despite her apparent preoccupation and only conducted her investigation during down time. It explained the dark circles under her eyes but they were the only outward sign of her fatigue.

"Something you want to share with the class there, Reg?" Rick's voice was kind and, though he tried to sound nonchalant, he failed miserably.

Straightening at her desk, she shifted the papers in front of her in an attempt to look busy. "Nope, just thinking over the particulars of the next mission," she began convincingly. "It'll be our first time in the field without Gail."

Rick shot her an unsure look before shrugging and plopping down at the desk in front of her. "I'm sure we'll be just fine."

Regina rolled her eyes but didn't comment. Rick's feelings for their leader were painfully obvious but that didn't mean she enjoyed hearing about their shared animosity all the time.

The silence that stretched into the far reaches of the room and covered the two like an ominous fog was anything but comfortable. It was odd. Their silences were always of the friendly, amiable sort.

"So, uh," he began unsurely. "What's been going on with you lately? You seem kind of...distracted."

"Rick." She knew her tone was just this side of 'whiny' but she couldn't help it; it was an instinctual response. "Can we not do this right now? I've got a stack of reports here due on Gail's desk by quitting time."

"I'm just worried about you," he pressed on, hands raised in what he hoped was some universal sign of peace. "I know that whole T.R.A.T. thing was hard on you, being the only survivor and all but-"

Hazel eyes narrowed at that but before she could interrupt him, someone else did.

"Rick," Gail barked from the door. "Give us a minute."

She didn't know how long he'd been there but she had to admit: he always did have great timing.

Rick didn't reply, he simply nodded and made his way for the hall. Gail's expression meant business and, though he was always testing his limits with the older man, he'd learned the hard way to never interfere when it came to his interactions with Regina. They had a special relationship that he didn't know about, nor did he care to.

Gail took Rick's abandoned seat once they were alone. Usually one to jump headlong into things, Regina was surprised when he didn't speak but sat there for a moment, gathering his thoughts.

"Just spit it out, Gail," she began, visibly startling him. "Go ahead and tell me that I look like shit or that I should go home and rest. Tell me that I'm forbidden from visiting Kirk's lab, that you're taking away my information clearance. Tell me you'll demote me until I get my head back in the game." The words came out in a rush, as if she'd been holding them in for so long that, once she'd started putting a voice to them, they tumbled out without her consent. "Tell me that's why you're here because if you don't tell me no one else will."

She was begging and it was foreign to her. She could tell Gail definitely wasn't expecting it but he'd forgive her for catching him off guard later. He always did.

Recovering quickly, he cleared his throat and placed his elbows on Rick's desk. Leaning toward her he spoke in that stern, demanding tone that was his trademark. "You've been out of it," he began slowly, still contemplating his words. "I want it to end."

She laughed and shook her head. He never disappointed her.

"Your clearance has been pulled and your visits to Kirk will end even if it means I have to kill the bastard."

And he meant it; she'd never know how much. Whatever happened during those visits Kirk was taking away the best agent he'd ever worked with. The man was erasing the woman he'd trained himself and he didn't like it.

"I don't know what happened in Edward City and I don't rightly care. You're not there anymore, you're here and that means that all of you has to be here." He paused then and looked to be considering something before continuing. "Keep it up and I'll pull you from active duty."

Silence settled over them and for a moment they just stared at each other.

Suddenly she smiled, nodding agreeably. "Thank you."

A fleeting smirk passed over his face. "Now that the bullshit's been taken care of," he began gruffly, prompting her grin to split a few more inches and a giggle to escape her. "What the hell is up with you lately?"

"It's complicated."

He rolled his eyes. "I have time." A pause. "And I'm smarter than I look."

"I promised Dylan I'd come back for he and Paula."

She could feel the disappointment radiating off him in menacing waves. She'd let him down. She'd known it was wrong even before the words had gone cold but at the time she hadn't been able to stop them.

The situation had been so tragic and Paula so helpless. She didn't blame Dylan for staying behind with her because she couldn't say she wouldn't have done the same if the tables had been turned. Promising a rescue for the hero and young woman she'd left behind had been easy at the time, even logical. Expected.

What was she supposed to say? No? That she would return to their time and forget that he had ever existed?

She couldn't do that. Her conscious wouldn't allow it.

Gail was disappointed though and she knew that making promises was out of her sphere of power. It wasn't really up to her. It was why they were taught not to make promises in the first place. Nothing was absolute, nothing was for sure. The circumstances didn't matter, the government could and would do whatever they wanted despite oaths sworn out in the field and vows written in blood.

"Regina," he growled, blue eyes narrowed and cold.

"I know but you weren't there," she accused. "You don't know what it's like to run through a portal, knowing that there's a good chance the person you went through with is never coming back." He shook his head but she continued. "That could have been me and if it had, Dylan would have promised to come back."

"And he would have been wrong too," Gail returned harshly. "The government has had enough of dinosaurs and the Third Energy. The technology isn't stable and we've lost countless agents already trying to finish what Kirk started, then again trying to undo it."

She opened her mouth to protest, to offer her status as an agent and her life in order to find a way to save the two she'd left behind but again he shook his head.

"The government has officially closed the case and plans to put the discs on emergency lock-down are already being carried out. You can't go back now even if I'd let you."

Hazel eyes widened, stunned. "So that's it then?" she wondered, voice wavering slightly. "We just leave them to die there? Forget about them? Pretend none of this ever happened?"

Blue eyes softened and their owner nodded solemnly. "It's what the government does best."

She stood up, determined. "Not me," she vowed, shaking her head. "I'll never forget and I'll never stop trying."

Gail stood, towering over her in an attempt at intimidation. "You have to. That's an order."

Hazel met blue and the stare-down seemed to last for ages before blue eyes faltered and he dropped his head.

Grinning in the victory of her bittersweet triumph, she pushed by him and left the room, the door closing resolutely behind her. He knew where she was going and he wouldn't stop her. It wouldn't do any good anyway.

000

Well that's it. Hope everyone enjoyed it.