Disclaimer: I don't own any of these characters, they are owned by Shonda Rhimes and ABC. No copyright intended.
Kiss Me
It had been just over a month since the storm had changed everything, had taken everything. Richard, after crashing several times in the OR, had finally been stabilised but he was now lying in a coma in the hospital. Baby Bailey was doing really well and Meredith was on maternity leave enjoying her time with her children. Owen and Christina hardly ever talked to each other about anything other than their patients. Avery avoided April too afraid he would do or say anything that could ruin her engagement, her happiness. Callie and Arizona, they were barely surviving, broken shells of what they used to be. Callie didn't really talk to anyone other than her patients and their families, putting all of her energy into taking care of Sofia and putting on a facade of being strong and put together for them. Arizona shuffled through the halls with her head hung low in fear of being scorned by everyone for causing Callie so much pain, for breaking the most loved doctor in the entire hospital. Mostly she was afraid of looking up and seeing the broken state Callie was in. She was completely ashamed of what she had said to Callie and the pain that she had caused her but she was also still mad at Callie for cutting off her leg and breaking her promise. After their fight Arizona had moved into Mark's old apartment the next morning and they had been shuffling Sofia between the two apartments splitting time with her. Since they hadn't had a real conversation since that night their schedule for Sofia was currently based off of their work schedules, only communicating via text letting each other know when the other could pick her up.
Tonight everyone was at Joe's for a small party celebrating April and Matthew's engagement. April and Matthew had asked a few of their friends to give a small speech for them at the party. Callie had been roped into being the one to do it from their group, mostly because no one else really liked the couple enough to give a speech. Callie didn't think she would be able to get through a whole speech about love and commitment so she chose to sing a song instead.
"April and Matthew, I hope you guys don't mind but I thought I would sing a song for you guys instead of giving a speech. Cherish and hold on to this feeling of love that you have for one another right now, it's so incredibly precious."
As the notes began Callie closes her eyes and takes a deep breath trying to steady herself.
Settle down with me
Cover me up
Cuddle me in
Lie down with me
And hold me in your arms
And your heart's against my chest, your lips pressed to my neck
I'm falling for your eyes, but they don't know me yet
And with a feeling I'll forget, I'm in love now
Kiss me like you wanna be loved
You wanna be loved
You wanna be loved
This feels like falling in love
Falling in love
We're falling in love
She looked up and caught Arizona's eyes across the room. They stood there staring at each other unable to look away as Callie continued to sing.
Settle down with me
And I'll be your safety
You'll be my lady
I was made to keep your body warm
But I'm cold as the wind blows so hold me in your arms
Oh no
My heart's against your chest, your lips pressed to my neck
I'm falling for your eyes, but they don't know me yet
And with this feeling I'll forget, I'm in love now
Kiss me like you wanna be loved
You wanna be loved
You wanna be loved
This feels like falling in love
Falling in love
We're falling in love
Yeah I've been feeling everything
From hate to love
From love to lust
From lust to truth
I guess that's how I know you
So I hold you close to help you give it up
She remembered all the times they argued as well as all the time they made up. From the beginning when Arizona had found out Callie was a "new born" to when she realised that some things were worth the risk. From the debacle about having kids to the shooting. From the moment Arizona left Callie in the airport breaking both their hearts to the moment Arizona accepted Sofia as part of their future. From the car crash to finally bringing Sofia home to their apartment. From the moment Arizona left to get on that damned plan to now, to this...this mind numbing limbo they were in. No way to change the past but with no idea how move on.
They stood there staring at each other, both sets of eyes full of unshed tears, so much pain and heartbreak. What do they do now? There was no doubt that they still loved each other but was it enough anymore? Could they get past this and forgive each other so that they could move on and be happy again? Could they ever trust each other again?
So kiss me like you wanna be loved
You wanna be loved
You wanna be loved
This feels like falling in love
Falling in love
We're falling in love
Kiss me like you wanna be loved
You wanna be loved
You wanna be loved
This feels like falling in love
Falling in love
We're falling in love
As the final note faded out Callie's tears began to fall, she closed her eyes and shook her head. Finally two worlds were heard just barely above a whisper,
"I can't."
With a deep sigh she wiped her eyes, squared her shoulders and held her head high and she strode out of the bar only staring straight ahead.
As she watched Callie walk out of the bar Arizona realised that she had to do something, had to say something. So after a few seconds to collect herself she quickly followed Callie out. As she got out the door she looked around and noticed that Callie was half a block down so she quickened her steps to catch up with her.
"Calliope!"
Callie stopped and slowly turned around to look at her.
"Callie I,..."
As Arizona looked at Callie she noticed that Callie had started crying again, silent tears were streaming down her face as she stood there looking back at Arizona. Arizona could see the defeat in Callie's eyes, the utter exhausting from having had to fight Arizona for so long, from having to fight for her but more so against her. Callie deserved better, she deserved someone that would fight for her too. Despite how much she wished she could be Arizona just wasn't ready to be that person right now, she had to finally fight for herself before she could fight for someone else. She had to let herself heal.
Callie turned back around and continued walking back to her apartment. She didn't hear the two words that she had longed to hear from the one person she ever truly loved.
"I'm sorry."