A/n This is for Specialshipping19's songfic contest! *yay* Okey-dokey, the song I've chosen is Lie to Me (Denial) by Red (the band, not the super cool trainer), which is one of my favoritest songs in the universe ever. The ship I've chosen is *what else* Choosenshipping, which is my favoritest couple in the universe ever. So, without further ado- oh, wait. Blue is twenty-one and Silver is eighteen in this fic, m'kay? All right. Please r&r, people! ^_~ And this is my first songfic, so if it's *awful*, please tell me and explain why. Thank you.
I don't own Pokemon or 'Lie to Me (Denial)', but they both rock. It helps if you listen to that song while reading this too, just so you know.
Tell yourself it's over now.
It was over now. He couldn't face himself, couldn't face her. Not after what he'd done. It was too late for feelings and heartache to get in the way; it was too late for affection and tears to stop him from leaving; and nothing would ever be the same.
Try to kill a broken vow.
He was breaking his promise, walking away like this. He bit back the pain as he remembered his own words . . . "I swear, I will never leave you." But he had to, now. Staying with her meant ruining her life. 'I can't do it! I can't!'
If only you could find the strength to kill the memories.
They replayed in his head; everything he had done, all she had done for him, his whole life was on tape, rolling before him as he walked swiftly through the pouring rain. He was soaking wet, but that didn't matter. He couldn't see it, couldn't feel it through the anger he felt towards himself; the resentment of his own hands.
Those empty pages never turn.
He had been living peacefully on the Sevii Islands, so he could be close to her and her family. They had approved of him, only because she did, he was sure. Her life was coming back together. His life, on the other hand . . . He couldn't move past all his shortcomings. Those, though, were only the beginning.
You lit the flame and let them burn.
He wasn't quite sure what had come over him- never mind. He knew, now. Something about the rain pattering on the streets reminded him. It was when someone had gotten a bit . . . reckless. He'd been walking her home, just earlier that night, when a man who Silver was already quite sick of thought it would be funny to tease her a bit. It was when he touched her, though, that things got messy.
He threw himself into the guy, but found him much larger and tougher than he'd thought. He yelled for her to go home through the punches being thrown at him. When he was finally finished, and the streetlights broke through the liquid haze, he'd seen what he'd done.
The man was still alive. Barely.
He had the decency to call the hospital before taking off; this would ruin everything. The guy had been horrible, to be sure, but there would be some people who wouldn't see the crime as bad as the punishment.
They wouldn't let someone do that to the mayor's son.
You tried to bury me so deep, but what lies beneath?
He wouldn't be able to see her eyes, full of tears, wondering how he could do that to someone. In the light, he was sure it looked a lot worse. What would her parents think of him? Worse, what would she think of him?
Will your hope die alone?
He had to leave the Sevii Islands. He had to find some other purpose, somewhere. He could be a traveling trainer, a gym assistant; he'd even be a waiter if it meant sparing her from himself.
Will you fade on your own?
She deserved better than him. She was always better than him. He finally came to port, and forced himself to step aboard a ship. He didn't even look back; he only thought about how grateful he was that the ships ran even at this hour.
Can you just turn away and let me go?
Everything burned inside of him; regret, anger, pain, misery . . . everything he'd been struggling to hide bubbled up and refused to go away.
What if . . . what if she was heartbroken that he left?
'No. She has other friends. She'll be fine.'
He tried convincing himself it was the truth; it didn't work so well.
Lie to me if you can feel that this love was never real.
She'd never noticed him, anyways. At least, not how he wanted. He was stuck being little brother, protecter, confidant, and best friend. If that's what she wanted, then he'd be happy. He'd make himself be happy. He'd tell himself it was all he ever wanted anyways.
In all his days, he'd never been worse at lying than now.
Walk away if you can learn to love again.
He'd dreamed of telling her; lately, the urge had gotten stronger, but just as he would open his mouth to tell her, he could see their bond ripping apart. It scared him. He would hold his tongue, and swear never to threaten that relationship.
It was what held him together.
'But it's what breaks me apart.'
Lie to me, watch me bleed.
He remembered her going on and on about the young man who had most recently caught her fancy; the mayor's son himself. He felt his hands clench into fists. As if by instinct, he tossed a quick glance around his cabin, just to make sure no one was witnessing the look of fury in his eyes.
I'll still be here when you see, you're not alone, you don't have to run again.
As he looked at his hands; still stained with blood, and some his own, his mind drifted back again. The young man was good looking, charismatic, charming, knew all the right things to say, and all the right times to say them. He was the object of many a girl's affections, and somehow, he found himself adding Blue to that list.
She was a fickle mind, though, and as soon as he was sure he had her, she decided that she didn't like him after all. Silver had learned by then not to take any of her crushes seriously; most of them didn't remain crushes for too long. This young man, however, decided he was not to be taken lightly.
He set his mind to a cruel thought; if he couldn't have her, then no one could. And so, he spread rumors and lies all around the islands, and all of them targeted Blue.
She was quickly shunned by the quiet people of the islands. Her friends, and Silver, of course, remained by her side, as did her parents.
Silver swore that he would make him pay for what he'd done to her.
She made him swear he wouldn't hurt him.
"Blue," he'd argued, "what about all he's done to you?"
"Eh, let him be," she'd chimed lightly. "If that's the best he's got, he doesn't deserve our time," she finished with a wink.
And leave me in denial.
As time went by, things got worse. Phone calls in the middle of the night, him following her around, writing cryptic, cruel letters, among other things.
She told the police, but they wouldn't dare arrest the mayor's son.
"Silver, you don't have to worry. I can take care of myself," she'd laughed, shrugging off the last letter like it didn't matter.
'I know you can . . .' he'd thought. 'But still . . .'
All your secrets crawl inside.
She'd just been invited to a party. "Please come with me, Silver. It'll be fun."
He shook his head. "Blue, you know I don't go to those kind of things . . ."
Grinning cheekily, she responded, "What if I said please?" When he looked up, he saw that she was dangerously close to his face.
"Uh- um- yeah, okay." She backed away, and he breathed a sigh of relief.
If he wasn't careful, he might've just kissed her right there.
You keep them safe, you let them hide.
When he picked her up to take her to the party, he hoped he looked okay. 'It's just a suit. Not even a tie . . . hope that's all right. It's a small party, though, so it should be fine.' His dress shirt was unbuttoned a bit, and his hair was down like normal. Just then, Blue opened the door, and he nearly passed out.
Her dress was navy blue, down to mid-shin, and flowing with careful folds here and there. She wore heels, but even then she wasn't fully up to Silver's height. Her hair was down, and looked much, much softer than Silver had ever remembered it. As finishing touches, she wore a matching necklace and earrings. "Oh, you look nice!" she'd exclaimed. "Are you ready?"
"Uh- well-" She took his arm before he could finish.
"Let's go." She beamed her knock-out smile, and for a few moments, Silver forgot where he was and what he was supposed to be doing.
"O-oh, yeah."
You feel them drinking in your pain,
As soon as they arrived, Blue was whisked from his side for a dance. And another. And another. He watched from the corner, keeping an eye out for the mayor's son, who would most certainly be there. His gaze never left Blue for more than a few moments, though. Of course, he always felt even a tiny piece of his heart chip away as he saw her in the arms of someone else.
To kill the memories.
He stood and watched, silent and cold as stone, making sure nothing bad happened to her; keeping her safe from harm. She'd done that, long ago, for him. Now it was his turn to pay her back. He loved her too much to tell her how he felt, though.
So close your eyes and let it hurt, the voice inside begins to stir.
All of his emotions hit him like a wave when he saw the man she was dancing with get closer and closer to her. He was tempted to go over there and take her away from him, but it was too late for that.
Their lips met.
Are you reminded of all you used to be? Can you just turn away and let me go?
He closed his eyes and exhaled shakily. A sensation much like electricity pulsed through him, but he forced himself to stay still.
'For her. If this is what she wants, so be it. If this is what she wants . . .'
It was almost too much. But not quite.
All the pain you fed, it starts to grow inside.
The party ended, finally, and not too soon for Silver. He'd had his share of 'festivity' for one night. To both of the young adult's chagrin, however, rain was pouring down. Thunder could be heard in the distance, a rumbling echo of all Silver felt. His feelings ran wild, but still, he held on.
Until he showed up.
It lives again and you can't let it die,
He was angry. His tone was filled with mocking hurt. 'He must've seen her kiss that guy too . . .' Silver mused as he stood defensively between the two.
Blue told him to leave as the rain beat down on the three. He didn't listen. Ever bold, she took a step closer to him, from behind her protective companion, and argued once more that he had to leave her alone.
He came forward and grabbed her shoulder.
And that was enough.
so you believe you'll never find
Silver stared at the blood on his hand and let the ringing of the rain on the window envelop him. He'd done this for her. But she wouldn't have wanted him to take it that far.
He shivered involuntarily. He was still soaking wet. Something drew him back outside, though; out onto the deck of the boat. Once he reached it, he watched the rain pattering lightly down, now slowed quite a lot from the pace it had gone. The boat sloshed back and forth, but he felt as if everything was still; that he was a statue, broken-hearted and pining for something he knew would never come to be.
As the droplets of water dripped down on him, he looked down. 'How many dreams am I burning for this? Will I always have my memories?
Is keeping her safe from myself worth losing her?'
He didn't know the answer. All he knew was that it hurt.
He turned to walk back inside when he heard something behind him.
"Silver."
He didn't dare turn around. He knew that voice too well . . . inquisitions flooded his mind, but he shrugged them all off.
All his mind would register was that she was here.
"Silver, please . . ." she pleaded gently. He obliged. Standing beside her-to Silver's shock-was her next door neighbor's fearow. Her shoes were gone, her dress was torn, and her make-up was smeared.
He'd never seen her more gorgeous in his life.
"D-did you come here on Fearow?" he asked hesitantly, not fully trusting his own voice.
She smiled. "Yeah, I did." She could see the next question in his eyes, so she added, "I knew you'd try and leave after that."
Silver sighed.
"You left before letting me thank you."
His eyes widened and he looked up. No, she wasn't joking. "B-but, I thought-"
"He deserved what you gave him. You stood up for me, and I really appreciated that." As she spoke, she walked closer. "You've been doing things like that for me for as long as I can remember."
He allowed a small smile to come to his face as he recollected times when he'd been beat up by Will for standing up for Blue. It had always been worth it.
"I-I did something wrong today. I led a good man on; someone who deserves better. I need to apologize to him for that . . . and tell him that I don't love him."
Those last statements pierced his very soul. So that's why she was here. He heard his heart thumping in his ears, and he grew very hot, but he restrained himself for her.
'If this is what she wishes . . . so be it.'
"You see, I really never should have messed with him anyways."
She was now within an arm's reach of him.
"Because I'd missed something all this time."
She took one more step.
"I've always had-and hopefully always will have-you."
He had no chance to respond; she kissed him.
The rain fell lightly on the couple, and all that Silver had ever wanted, ever hoped for, was fulfilled just then.
She wanted to be with him forever.
And that was all that mattered.
a reason to love again.