A/N
: First DN Angel FanFic, first SongFic, and first oneshot. I absolutely adore the pairing of Riku and Dark, and the song "Knock 'Em Out" by Lily Allen is HYSTERICAL. The first time I heard it, I couldn't stop laughing. I'm debating on whether or not to make an epilogue or not. Flames are not appreciated, thank you. I'm warning you all now, I don't have Spellcheck on WordPad. Geh.

Disclaimer: I do NOT own DN Angel, and I do NOT own "Knock 'Em Out" by Lily Allen. If I owned DN Angel, I never would have created a character like Risa Harada that was so obsessed about social standings and if I owned "Knock 'Em Out," I would have it played in every public place. Ha.


Knock 'Em Out

Alright, so this is a song about anyone,
It could be anyone.
You're just doing your own thing,
And someone comes out the blue,
They're like "Alright"
What you sayin'?
"Yeah, can I take your digits?"
And you're like, "No, not in a million years.
You're nasty, please leave me alone."


Riku Harada sat at a table in a local pub with her beer in hand. In all honesty, she despised drinking, but old habits die hard. She bobbed her head to a beat from the jukebox in the corner. From the sound of it, it was a jazz number. It was confirmed when she heard the saxophones blaring.

"Mr. Tsugaru, you're an amazing character." She smiled fondly at the mention of the owner of the pub, an old friend of the family, and sipped her beer. The music seemed to just float around her. These days, the bars only played the current trendy hip hop or techno music to bring in the crowds. It was rare to find a pub that played the classics. There was a girl next to her and by the looks of it, she was a bar junkie, picking up any man that would buy her a drink. The girl had attempted conversation with Riku, and through the small pieces, she found out her name was Mio. She was a petite blonde with a heavy accent, dressed in some pretty skimpy clothing.

'Reminds me of Risa's night clothes when she's trying to impress Hiwatari.' Riku giggled at the thought of her twin trying to get a rise out of the stoic male. She then noticed the girl get up and walk over to a man who kept glancing in the general direction of the two girls.

Cut to the pub on a lads night out,
Man at the bar cos' it was his shout,
Clocks this bird and she looked okay,
She caught him looking and walked his way,
"Alright, darling? You gonna' buy us a drink then?"
"Err, no, but I was thinking about buying one for your friend."

He was pretty handsome from what she could see. He was around her age and a plum color adorned not only his hair, but his eyes too, strikingly so. He was wearing a black button-up shirt with the top two buttons undone and a pair of ordinary black jeans that seemed to fit his form nicely. Riku was always very observant and gained this knowledge when she had only glanced at the man for a few seconds. Surprisingly, the pub was pretty quiet with a decent sized crowd, and she strained her ears to hear the conversation the girl was trying to have with the man.

She's got no taste, hand on his waist,
Tries to pull away, but her lips are on his face,
"If you insist, I'll have a white wine spritzer."
"Sorry love, but you ain't a pretty picture."

"Hey Doll, how are you doing tonight?" She purred and leaned on the table in front of him. He gave a heart-melting smile.

"I'm doing fine, Miss. May I ask you a question, though?" His eyes bore into hers.

"Sure." Mio grinned. "By any chance, did you catch that girl's name that you were with?" He asked her politely, tilting his head.

Her face immediately fell at his question. "Yeah, it's Riku."

You can't knock em' out,
You can't walk away,
Try desperately to think of the politest way to say
"Just get out my face! Just leave me alone!
And no, you can't have my number."
"Why?"
"Because I lost my phone."

"Oh yeah, actually umm I'm pregnant,
Umm yeah, I'm having a baby in like 6 months, so, no..."

"Thank you. That's all," He replied and smirked, leaning back in his chair. She turned and walked away in a huff.

Riku shook her head. 'A disappointmet to all females. How depressing.' That was when she noticed a presence next to her. "Something you need?" She took another swig of her beer, polishing it off.

"Is this seat taken?" The man from the other table asked, motioning to the chair next to her with what looked like a scotch on the rocks in his hand. She looked over at the chair.

"Does it look like it's taken?" Her eyes narrowed slightly, eyeing the individual.

I recognize this guy's way of thinking
As he walks over, her face starts sinking
She's like, "Oh, here we go..."
It's a routine check-up, she already knows.

She's thinking, "They're all the same."
"Yeah, you alright baby? You look alright still? Yeah, what's your name?"
She looks in her bag, takes out a fag,
Tries to get away from the guy on the blag,
Can't find a light, "Here, use mine."
"See, the thing is I just don't have the time."

"For all I know, you could be a child with a fake ID, and your imaginary friend is sitting next to you," he said jokingly, though his eyes told her otherwise, slightly wondering if his assumptions were correct.

Riku smirked and turned her head to the gentleman. "Why, of course. Can't you see the word 'JAILBAIT' tattooed accross my forehead?" Her comment was drowning in sarcasm and it relieved him a bit.

You can't knock 'em out,
You can't walk away,
Try desperately to think of the politest way to say
"Just get out my face! Just leave me alone!
And no, you can't have my number,
Cos' I lost my phone."

The bartender came over to the table, taking her empty beer bottle and replacing it with a full one as the man sat down in the vacant chair next to her. The pub was still quite a bit hushed, everyone keeping their conversations hushed and friendly.

"My name is Dark. Dark Mousy. What happens to be yours, my dear?" He smiled, sipping at his beverage. She could feel his eyes wandering her body. Normally, she would lash out at anyone who even glanced at her, but she didn't want to make a scene, and the pub owner was a kind, old gent. He deserved better than that.

"Well, first off, I'm not your dear. Second, my name is Riku. Riku Harada." Riku's eyes pointed a fix glare and Dark held up his hands in defense.

"I didn't mean to offend you, honest. I just thought you looked quite lonely, drinking beers by yourself. I wanted to make sure you were all right."

"Well, as you can see, I'm just fine," she stated malevolently and blew into the beer bottle softly. Dark just sat there staring at her. Her auburn hair was chopped beneath her chin with two longer pieces framing her face angelically. Her bangs brushed right above her chocolate brown eyes. 'Riku Harada.' He had to make sure he wasn't dreaming. Even in a t-shirt and jeans, she still looked stunning to him.

Go away now, let me go,
Are you stupid? Or just a little slow?
Go away now, I've made myself clear...
I don't think so!
Nah, it's not gonna' happen!
Not in a million years!

"Do you have a problem?" She gritted her teeth angrily, annoyed that he wouldn't stop staring.

"I'm just admiring your beauty. You're blessed with a wonderful complexion and amazing curves." Dark winked, causing a dark red to stain her cheeks.

"Ergh. Pervert!" Riku muttered. Dark laughed heartily, placing a hand on her shoulder.

"Come on now, Riku. Surely you've been told this before?" He questioned. The innocent gesture of his hand on her shoulder seemed to somehow burn her, and she attempted to remove it, but his other hand caught hers. "Your face is flushed. How many beers have you had?"

Her eyes widened slightly and thought back. "Uhm, I think this is my fifth." For some reason, the concern in his eyes scared her. "I feel fine."

Dark sighed. 'Low alcohol tolerance. She's just begging to be a victim of Date Rape.'

"Erm... Dark, are you all right?" Riku waved a hand in front of his face, breaking him from his thoughts. His smirk appeared on his face.

"Just thinking, Love." He brushed his fingers along her cheek softly. Her face flushed and she bit her tongue.

"I am not your love!" She retorted and pushed his hand away from her face.

"Ahh, how you wound me, Riku." Dark held his hand over his heart and smiled playfully.

"Hmph. You're such a pervert!" Riku crossed her arms over her chest defiantly. This only made Dark laugh once again.

You can't knock 'em out,
You can't walk away,
Try desperately to think of the politest way to say(err...)
"Just get out my face! Just leave me alone!
And no, you can't have my number,
Cos' I lose my phone."

"How about we make a bet?" Her eyes narrowed and sent him a deadly glare.

"What kind of bet?"

"If I guess your age, I win..." Dark sat there for a few moments thinking over the possibilties. Finally settling on one, he opened his mouth again. "...a kiss from you."

Riku's eyes widened in horror. "Excuse me? That's not fair, you damn pervert! For all I know, you can have Mono!" He shushed her before she got too loud.

"I guarantee that I don't have any diseases or infections of any kind. I take very good care of my body. If I guess incorrectly, I will leave you alone right now, and you'll never see me again." This tempted Riku slightly. She pondered for a while, biting on her lip subconciously. Her actions made Dark want to kiss her right then and there.

"It's a deal." She smirked and leaned back. "All right, then," he replied.

'There's no way he'll guess that I'm...'

"...Twenty-two." Her eyes widened in complete shock and she just about fell out of her chair, if not for Dark, who grabbed her arm.

"B-but... How?" Riku stuttered. "There's no way..."

Dark smirked and looked straight into her chocolate eyes with his plum orbs. "I'm going out on a limb here to say I guessed correct?" Riku bit her lip and nodded, her head drooping in defeat.

You can't knock 'em out,
You can't walk away,
(Ah, actually I'm getting married next week...)
Try desperately to think of the politest way to say,
"Just get out my face! Just leave me alone!
And no, you can't have my number,
Cos' I lost my phone."

"Aw, come on, Hun." He lifted her chin up and his lips drifted closer to hers. "It'll be fun, as long as you don't kiss like a fish." She growled, but before she could fling a comeback at him, his lips connected with her own. It was as if an electric shock had been sent from her lips down her spine, and it only increased when nibbled on her bottom lip, silently asking for permision to enter her mouth. Shyly, Riku opened her mouth, and Dark's tongue darted in, tangling with her own. She had no choice but to respond, their tongues battling for dominance. After a few moments, Riku put a hand against Dark's chest and pushed him away gently, although with some force.

His eyes were still closed when he pulled away and when he slowly opened them, he smiled and noticed the growing blush on Riku's face. Her heart was pounding against her ribcage and she thought her chest would explode any moment. 'Why am I reacting like this? It's like I've never been kissed before...' In fact, Riku had only been kissed a few times in her whole life, but nothing like, well... THAT.

Truth was, for Dark it was similar. He had kissed many girls and been kissed by many girls as well, but none of those kisses were like what he just felt. It was like he felt complete. There was something about this girl... She intrigued him in so many ways.

"Well, Riku, I must say..." Riku looked up when he began talking. "You're a wonderful kisser." Dark grinned when she looked away quickly, her face becoming a dark red color.

"Damn pervert." Although, inside, she was smiling slightly. Riku dug through her bag, pulling out a pack of gum. She offered one to Dark, who politely denied, and she shrugged putting a stick of gum in her mouth, and licking the flavor off the wrapper. Dark drank down the rest of his drink and closed his eyes, smirking. This girl was something, all right.

Riku glanced up at the clock to check the time. '2:49 AM'

Nah, I've gotta' go cos' my house is on fire.
I've got herpes, err no, I've got syphilis.
AIDS! Aids, I've got Aids!
I FORGOT MY VAGASIL!


"Well, Dark, it's been lovely, but it's late." Riku neatly folded the gum wrapper into a triangle and threw it in the middle of the table.

"Why don't I give you a ride home?" Dark suggested standing up with her as she got her sweater on.

"It's okay, pervert. I plan on walking. Besides, I throw a mean right hook." She rolled her eyes and put the money for her drinks underneath her beer bottle.

"It was lovely spending time with you. I hope I see you again sometime soon." Dark smirked, gazing down into her eyes. A light blush tinted her cheeks.

"Who knows? Maybe it'll be sooner than later. Goodbye, Dark Mousy." She turned and walked to the door, waving a hand over her shoulder.

"Goodbye, Riku Harada." He smiled and watched her leave. Once the door shut behind her, he sat back down. That was when he noticed a glimmer on the table. It was the gum wrapper. Dark sighed and picked it up, folding the triangular shape's corners in and unfolding it once again. He then realized there was writing on it. Opening the wrapper completely, his face broke out into a grin.

"Well, what do you know?" He said and tugged his phone from his pocket.


Riku sighed as she walked down her street, counting the house numbers to her apartment. She jumped when she felt her phone vibrate from her bag. She flipped it open and answered. "Hello?"

"Tomorrow, at the italian restaurant on the corner by the pub. 6:30 PM. Don't be late, Riku Harada." The caller hung up before she could respond and she shook her head, laughing. Damn you, Dark Mousy. That was the last time she would ever give her number out to someone she met at a bar. 'Stupid pervert.' Riku smiled and walked up to her apartment, going inside, and locking the door behind her. What she wouldn't give to knock him out though.

Back at the pub, Dark leaned back against his chair with a satisfied smirk. Riku Harada would be his, no matter what. This was just the beginning.


A/N: Okay, my first ever. Huzzah :D It's pretty short, but there's not much to put in a one-shot, especially if it's a songfic. The song isn't exactly a long one either. Question is, should I add an Epilogue or not? Heh. Later guys and gals. :D

Note: To readers of my other stories, I'm taking them all down, destroying them, then bringing them back to life in that order. Two years is a long time, and I improved on a lot of things in the area of writing. Don't get me wrong. I'm not perfect. No one is, but I improved and still am improving.