I'm Sueing You!
Disclaimer: Yeah, I own LOTR. Sure, sure… Don't be silly. I'm just playing with it.
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It began with the buying of the 21st Ring. It was given, as a birthday present, to Elanowel, immortal, wisest and fairest of all beings. Within this ring was bound the strength and will to govern all others. And she was not deceived.
She knew about the land of Mordor, the fires of Mount Doom, and the Dark Lord Sauron…
She watched from afar as he forged in secret a master ring, to control all others – except her own. She looked on with scorn as into this ring he poured his cruelty, his malice, and his will to dominate all life.
She murmured the charm as it glowed on the Ring. "One Ring to rule them all, One Ring to find them. One Ring to bring them all, and in the Darkness bind them."
One by one, the free lands in Middle-Earth fell to the power of the Ring. But there were some who resisted. A last alliance of Men and Elves marched against the armies of Mordor, and on the slopes of Mount Doom, they fought for the freedom of Middle-Earth.
Victory was near. But the power of the ring could not be undone.
It was in this moment when all hope had faded, that Isildur, son of the King, took up his father's sword.
And, as Elanowel watched gleefully, Sauron, the enemy of the free-peoples of Middle-Earth was defeated. The Ring passed to Isildur, who had this one chance to destroy evil forever.
But the hearts of men are easily corrupted. And the ring of power has a will of its own. It betrayed Isildur to his death. And some things, that should not have been forgotten, were lost.
History became legend, legend became myth, and for two and a half thousand years, the ring passed out of all knowledge, excepting Elanowel's, who watched still, and hardly a moment passed for her.
Until, when chance came, the Ring ensnared a new bearer.
The Ring came to the creature Gollum, who took it deep into the tunnels of the Misty Mountains. And there, it consumed him.
The Ring brought to Gollum unnatural long life. For five hundred years, it poisoned his mind. And in the gloom of Gollum's cave, it waited. Darkness crept back into the forests of the world. Rumour grew of a shadow in the east, whispers of a nameless fear, and the Ring of Power perceived. Its time had now come.
Elanowel observed it abandon Gollum. But something happened then the Ring did not intend. It was picked up by the most unlikely creature imaginable. A Hobbit: Bilbo Baggins of the Shire. And Elanowel smiled to herself.
For the time will soon come when Hobbits will shape the fortunes of all.
Elanowel knew all of this, and more. For, you see, Elanowel had seen the film five times.