Title: The Practical Princess and the Playboy
Disclosure:
Warner Brothers Television Distribution and Shoot The Moon Productions owns
these characters, as well as to the writers, and actors who created and
portrayed them.
Timing and
assumptions: This covers the entire
storyline… in which case, it's to canon.
Author: WhizGidget
Written: January 31, 2001
Rating: G
Archive: at
fanfiction.net, and I'd be honored to be elsewhere, just email me and let me
know where (astolzman@yahoo.com)
Summary: the
whole story, told fairy tale style.
Once upon a time,
a long time ago… say, the early to mid 80's, in a kingdom called Arlington,
there lived a practical princess called Amanda. She lived in a white castle with her mother, the princess called
Dotty, and her two sons, the princes: Philip and Jaime.
Princess Amanda
was a very ultra-practical princess – she knew where to find the best bargains,
and alternate uses for cola in cleaning the house. And she was a very kind princess as well. You see, Princess Amanda didn't think much
of class or difference; she did her own housecleaning, after all. And there was a gentle boring peasant who
loved the princess. He was a simple
man, who oft thought that he could predict the weather. There were others like him across the land
that thought that they could tell people what the weather would be like for the
next few days, but they had a 90% probability of being wrong. This peasant's name was Dean.
Princess Dotty
thought that her daughter should be married, and she didn't think much of class
either. She thought that this peasant
Dean was a wonderful man, one that you could confide your deepest thoughts and
feelings to. The Princess Amanda,
however, wasn't as enthusiastic about marrying the peasant; she thought that
there was something more to life, but in her life as a princess she had been
sheltered and did not know much of the world.
Well, one day,
the kind Princess Amanda found herself in her nightclothes rushing to assist
the peasant in his travels. After
sending him off, she was approached by a frantic, but devastatingly handsome
servant. Well, he was dressed as a
servant, and begging her to take a package and give it to a man in a red
hat. "Please, do this. You will never have to see me again." As I have said previously, she was a kind
princess, and she took pity on this poor, scared servant, and agreed to deliver
the package. Unfortunately, Amanda got
scared, and confused, and there were too many men wearing red hats, so she took
the package home.
That was the
beginning of the end of Princess Amanda's relationship with the peasant
Dean. And the beginning of the
education of our lovely princess as to the wondrous things that went on in the
world. She had long dreamed of
adventure and intrigue, but how would a practical princess find such
exploits? The handsome servant brought
them to her, or rather, brought her to them. You see, the servant was not what he seemed. He was part of an underground world of intrigue and adventure,
and he was quite the playboy. But he
did not have any sense of emotions, or how to care about people. And this made the princess very sad because
she could see that he was lonely in the truest sense of the word. The downside, besides the playboy's lack of
emotion, to all of the adventuring was that the princess was seeing her mother
and sons less often, and telling taller and taller tales to disguise her secret
life adventuring with the playboy.
The princess, not
knowing what to do when adventuring with the playboy, often found herself in
trouble. Sometimes she was alone, and
sometimes she was with the playboy. She
was often more comfortable with this knight in creamy leather jacket, whose
name was Lee; she felt very safe with him. But that made the playboy scared, as stated before, because he didn't
now know how to care about people, and often came off all wrong. He hurt the princess' feelings more times
than he cared to admit, but did not know how to apologize to her. He did not want to become friends with her
or care for her, as that would be an emotional investment. If he got attached, then someone or
something would just take her away; the princess was too important for
something to happen to her.
As time wore on,
the practical princess' views on solving problems became invaluable to the
playboy, and he found himself being less and less of a playboy. He found himself thinking about the Princess
Amanda more often and what it would be like to live in the kingdom of
Arlington. And he was hurting her
feelings less often, but couldn't bring himself to tell her that she was a good
adventurer too.
But alas, he
thought, she would never deem me worthy of her affections? Not after discounting her wont for
adventure, then scoffing her ideas; hurting her time and again? But she continued to join him when he went
adventuring… he did not understand the Princess, but then, it seemed, that no
one male ever understood a woman, so why should he understand a princess? Especially one that seemed to have a gift
for getting into trouble and talking non-stop.
Princess Amanda
was having similar thoughts – she was increasingly intrigued and interested by
the playboy, but he had traveled the world, and met very mysterious and exotic
women – whatever would he want with a practical suburban princess? And she figured that the answer was
'nothing' after she met the most recent of his beautiful girlfriends – she
could speak multiple languages, had many interesting travels in her life, and
looked very much like the princess. And so she found, that he wanted a princess all right, just not one so
practical as she. Or more specifically,
anyone but she.
After a rather
harrowing experience, however, the playboy realized that the practical princess
was exactly what he wanted, that he did have a heart and felt this amazing
sense of love for the princess, and became determined to win her heart. He stopped seeing all his previous
girlfriends, even moving all his belongings to someplace else to live so that
they couldn't show up on his doorstep. And he started acting more and more like a newfound knight in shining
armor – except he wore leather jackets instead, as they were much more
comfortable than plate mail. And then
tragedy struck.
The newfound
knight was being accused of being a traitor to his country. Many people wanted him dead – others thought
throwing him in the dungeons for 100 years would be sufficient. And the princess did not know what to
do. But the knight named Lee did –
since he was going to leave the kingdom to try and prove himself, he went to
the princess and told her that he loved her with all of his heart. But the princess wasn't about to stand for
it – he was not going to enter her life with a package and leave it by telling
her he loved her. She was going to go
on this adventure with him. And so she
did.
In the end, they
ended up proving that the knight was not a traitor, and they fell more and more
in love until one day they ran off and got married. And although the princess' family did not care about class or
rank, they did not tell anyone of their marriage. They were more in fear that enemies they made in their
underground adventures would want to hurt her family. And so the princess and the former playboy-now knight pretended
for a while that they weren't involved with one another, and they lived
apart. And their hearts hurt
terribly.
One day, while
trying to protect the kingdom, their secret had to be revealed. The princes were very excited because the
knight was a trendsetter, and had some very nice horses pulling a fine silver
carriage that they wanted to ride in. The Princess Dotty was a little sad that they had hidden this from her,
and scolded them about being sensitive to rank, even though she knew that her
daughter had never cared about such things. But she got over it, and threw a wonderful party for everyone she could
think of to celebrate her daughter's newfound happiness.
And so, the
former playboy who became a trustworthy knight now found himself emotionally transformed
into a prince, and moved into the white castle in the kingdom called Arlington,
and they all lived happily ever after.
The End.