AN: Another one-shot, kind of all occ. I based it more on how I feel and how I could relate to someone losing the one they love. This is Rory missing Jess and realizing that she must have really loved him. Please Review!!

Rory Gilmore stumbled through her closet, looking for her black heels. She saw one and reached to grab it, clumsily knocked over a box. The contents fell out and Rory cursed under her breath and she turned around to see what she had knocked over. Immediately, he frustrated look turned soft. She scooped up the contents back into the box and carried it to her bed. She sat down and stared at the box before she carefully opened it.

It was her Jess Box. It held all the memories she had from her relationship with Jess Mariano. The memories used to pain her so much. Everytime his face had appeared in her mind, tears threatened to fall. It had been a couple months since he left, but the memories had not since faded.

Lying gracefully on top was the concert ticket. She and Jess had gone to a Distillers concert so long ago, back in January of this year. She remembered the loud music of the band they had both loved, being surrounded by others who shared their passion for such music. Jess had slipped his sweaty hand into hers as she was singing the lyrics aloud. A smile played on his face as they stood, watching the band on stage, taking in the entire experience. On the ride home, both were pretty silent, still high from the sweet music. She remembered stopping at Paco's Tacos and them getting tacos for a midnight snack. She remembered laughing along with him when they hit a bump and she spilt her drink in his car. "Don't worry about it. It's a piece of crap already, now it's just a bit sticky." Jess had said as he laughed. That had been a great night for them…She set the concert ticket aside.

Underneath the ticket was a red shirt. It was his shirt. She remembered being down at Larson's Dock, reading when it started pouring rain. They had both ran towards Rory's house. Luckily, Lorelai was at work as the two teenagers stumbled, soaking wet, into the house. Jess had taken off his shirt so that it would dry faster. She had given him a big shirt that her mom had in her room. Jess smiled and thanked her with a kiss before he left, leaving his shirt behind, and her in awe. Rory smiled at the memory as she held the shirt close to her. It no longer smelled like him, but it was his, and that's what mattered most…

Next she found the rope bracelets. Jess had bought them and they almost matched. Hers was the broken one with the orange strand. She had loved it and wore in most everyday, but when it broke she put it away. Jess had asked why she wasn't wearing it anymore and when she told him, he slid his off his wrist and handed it to her. "You can have mine." He said simply. Rory had grinned at him and his kindness and his lovingness. He really had cared for her, sometimes she felt like she never really appreciated it like she should have.

She found notes that they had exchanged. Reading them made her sad…In one he had said that his dream had been that they would always be together. If he meant that, why did he give up on them so easily? The words made her really miss him. She wanted a second chance to put things back together…to fix everything that happened between them, but now she feared she'd never be granted that second chance. She really did love him and now she wished she had told him that.

Next she found his old hoodie. He had given it to him a long time ago, and even though it had been washed numerous times, she swore it still faintly smelled of him. The sweet smell that made her dizzy every time he had pulled her into him for a hug, or to kiss her lovingly. His hoodie was old and worn, it had been his favorite, but she had taken it from him with a smile. It was huge on her and she rarely wore it outside the comfort of her own home, but she loved it. She set it aside when something caught her eye…

An old pair of black converses lay rebelliously inside the box. She pulled them out and smiled. Jess had brought her to New York for the day while they were dating and he had convinced her to buy some converses. The memory came freshly to her as if it were just yesterday…

Jess had his arm draped lazily around her shoulders as they walked down the streets of New York. He saw an old store that he had always loved and steered her in the general direction. It was called 'Hot Topic'. It was a pretty dark store, but it was somewhere Rory ended up loving. Band T-shirts lined the walls. There were cds, studded belts, shoes and wristbands up to galore. She half wondered if Jess's entire wardrobe was purchased here as she spotted the great, but gross Metallica shirt that Jess had worn from time to time. She walked over to the bright shoes and looked at them questioningly. Jess came up behind her, wrapping his arms around her waist.

"You should get a pair of converses." He said with a smirk. Rory laughed and shook her head.

"Uh no, I'll pass." She said nervously. Jess smiled and pointed to his own shoes, completely black, unlike the shoes he was showing her.

"I'm wearing converses. Besides, I think you'll like them way more than your saddle shoes." He said sarcastically, speaking of the shoes she had to wear to school everyday. Rory scoffed.

"Fine, I'll get a pair, but only because you leave me no choice." She said accusingly.

"Fine by me. Get these ones." Jess said smartly as he pointed to some lime green converses. Rory laughed.

"No way, I'm getting the plain old black ones." She said, picking up the pair in her size. Jess smiled at her.

"Nice, going with the old school originals, huh?" He said smartly. He leaned in and planted a kiss on her cheek. "You won't be sorry."

Rory laughed. "Shut up." She said, punching him playfully.

Rory smiled at the memory. Jess had been right. The old black converses had gotten her through a lot. The white part had been drawn on with a sharpie. She, Jess and Lane had all drawn on their converses together one day after school in the town square. She half wondered if Jess still had his pure black converses with the silver sharpie drawings on it. She shook the thoughts out of her mind as she found the last object of importance in the box.

A black ipod, vandalized by punk stickers lay in the box with its charger and an old pair of skull candy headphones. Jess had given his old ipod to her when he had gotten a newer one. He had it loaded with music and told Rory that if she ever needed him, listen to the music and remember everything. Of course he meant this to come in handy when she went off to college, when they wouldn't see each other everyday. However, it didn't happen like that. Rory put the headphones in her ears and switched it on. The music was soft and loving, nothing like Jess' taste in music. The song was called Then She Appeared by: XTC. She knew the song well; she and Lane had gone through a phase where they sat around listening to XTC all day. This particular song reminded her of Jess. Apparently, Jess had thought so too.

She slipped his bracelet onto her wrist, pulled his old shirt over her own and slid on her old converses. She brought her knees up to her chest and cried. It was something she hadn't really done since he had left. The music filled her ears and her mind was remembering Jess for the first time in a long while. Every memory flooded back as her tears fell. She felt as though she had lost him forever, and all she had left were the memories and the stuff in her box. Maybe that would be enough one day. Maybe having known that she had loved and lost would be enough to get her through the hard times, but for today, losing him only brought tears. He was her everything and now he was her nothing. She knew she'd move on one day, but until then, she'd have his stuff to remember him by. He would have wanted her to remember the good times and smile about them. He would always have a spot in her heart; he'd always be the man who can't be moved.