"Yu I-"
"Yu, it's time to board your train!"
Dojima's voice cut through the air causing the young man to stumble over his words. With a quick smile and a wave of his hand, Yosuke Hanamura tried to keep his composure as he was standing face-to-face with his friend for the last time.
"Don't worry about it dude. It's nothing I can't just text or call you about."
"You can definitely text me it while I'm on the train. I've got a long way to sit and do nothing." Yu replied, a genuine smile etching onto his features just as they turned to head back to the rest of the group.
A few hugs were exchanged before the leader of the group moved onto the platform and then onto the train itself. Taking his seat, he stood by the window, waving all the while at the friends and family who still stood outside waiting for the train to take off out of sight.
And within seconds it did.
Standing at that platform, the one left behind felt like it had all gone by too fast.
The gust of wind that passed from the train leaving the station caused that intense reality to set in.
He'd lost his chance to say what he had wanted to, the words had slipped away so fast in the unease of what type of reaction might've spurned from his confession.
Only mere seconds had passed before Yosuke came to the realization that this was probably going to be the hardest thing he ever had to do in his life thus far- he had to find a way to live without him.
Your Call
. . .
Walking home alone had been a new and very odd venture to overcome.
The sun was setting, the clouds slowly shifting from blue to orange and then to a darker blue once again. Everyone had dispersed after the tearful farewell of their leader. Most of them had paired up to walk back home, but before Yosuke would've walked back home with the very person who had just departed that afternoon.
So, that left him wondering back home with nothing but his thoughts to plague him.
Every step he took, he beat himself even more over how he hadn't gotten everything out in the open. It was gradually becoming one of the biggest regrets he had.
His hands shoved in his pockets, even the music that was radiating through his orange headphones was hardly proving to be an escape as it usually would've been. The notes played, but every song seemed to match to his mood which was rather somber.
It was quite unlike him. Normally he was so lively, but in that moment he was just having one of those rare instances of lowering all his walls. The carefree side washing away, it was the one side of himself that only one person had ever seen.
But he was no longer here. He wasn't there walking by his side. Suddenly the road felt so long and the sky so big. Loneliness was his only companion now, and he hated every second of it.
"So how are things back in the city for you?"
"It's a busy atmosphere. But otherwise it's quiet."
"Sounds boring man. When I lived in the city it was always crazy."
"I was pretty much a loner there. It'll be interesting to see how different things will be now."
It worried him that he would never find friends like the ones he had made in Inaba.
Staring out the window, the scenery glided by in shades of green and darkness as a few hours had passed since he had boarded the train. There was only a mere hour or so left of his journey, and he had more than enough thoughts processing to keep himself occupied.
Yu leaned back in the large chair, letting himself close his eyes as he remembered some of the last few days he had spent back with the friends that had become like family.
There had been many things that he treasured about each individual that he had formed a bond with in the past year. But out of all of them, he had grown the closest to the one dubbed the Junes Prince.
Smiling to himself, he could already visualize how he had first met Yosuke properly as he was rolling around in a trashcan.
There was never a day that wasn't eventful in his presence. Every conversation was memorable, and it made him wish that they could've still been able to see each other somehow despite the distance.
Recalling conversations, the most recent one stirred into his mind.
"Yu I-"
"Yu, it's time to board your train!"
Dojima's voice cut through the air causing the young man to stumble over his words. With a quick smile and a wave of his hand, Yosuke Hanamura tried to keep his composure as he was standing face-to-face with his friend for the last time.
"Don't worry about it dude. It's nothing I can't just text or call you about."
Grey irises slid open slowly just as the figure leaned to rest his arms on the table in front of him. Staring down at the surface, he could remember every piece of his best friend so clearly. All the features of his face, the way his eyes would stare at him with every emotion possible. The fact that they had grown so comfortable with one another to reveal every part of themselves, it was something he knew was rare to come by.
Would he ever be able to find someone like Yosuke?
Feeling disturbed, he couldn't shake the feeling of how his friend's gaze had made him feel uneasy before he left to board the train. Remember it more clearly; there was an inflection in his voice, a nervousness that normally was never present.
No new text messages had been received in the past hours he had been gone. Sensing it was something important just from his friend's composition then, he found it strange that a text hadn't been sent immediately after he boarded. They had always texted pretty much non-stop in class and whenever they were away from one another.
It was definitely making Yu worry even more than before now.
Maybe the other was taking it harder than he initially thought he would. The way he went on about how he had such a busy schedule ahead with school and work, he didn't think he would be dwelling too much on his absence.
Of course, he couldn't just assume he would be completely fine so easily. It was evident now that he had wanted to say something to him, and now he just wanted to know what it was. The blunt side of him wanted to just send a text asking, but he had an underlying sense that it was something important.
And I'm tired, of being all alone.
Feet trailed along the side of the riverbank, stopped at the very spot where a rather important event had occurred.
The wind passed, the sky now darkening slowly as stars began to pattern in the sky. Staring straight ahead, Yosuke was visualizing the person that had once stood there. He had embraced him, holding him as he cried. That warmth had been such a perfect feeling, he never realized it until later on after he had calmed down.
It was now not only lonely but cold, standing there in that place.
The music blared through his headphones, and with his arms pulling away from his pockets, his head tilted back as he screamed into the night sky.
The cry held so many strings of emotion. He'd never felt so unsure of himself, so empty, and so unwilling to do anything in all of his life. It had only been a few hours, and it was like the most perfect method of torture for only him.
Clenching his teeth, he refused to let any tears fall. It wasn't fair for him to cry over something that he knew had been coming since the start. It wasn't fair for him to want to keep the other here, to never leave his side.
But most of all, it wasn't fair that he had all these feelings welling up inside, and now he couldn't say them to the one person who was gone.
And this solitary moment makes me want to come back home.
The train pulled into the station. Glancing at the cell phone, no texts had been received yet.
Begrudgingly, Yu grabbed his luggage and began to exit the train. He already knew his parents wouldn't be arriving back until an hour or so after him so he went in search of a cab.
He was already missing just being able to walk to where he needed to in less than ten minutes.
The streets were busy, the night lights brightening every block as the area was very populated. Couples were taking to the sidewalks, and walking alone with his bag rolling on the ground made him realize how alone he truly was.
Before, he had grown used to the loner-aspect of life. But, he had a taste of what it was like to not be alone. The companionship of his best friend, the way their dynamic was so effortless and perfect, he was really starting to grow concerned that he'd never find that ever again in his life.
Every step taken, his grey eyes would glance at the phone that was being clutched in his hand.
More than anything he just wanted to see that name appear on the screen.
Yu stopped. The crosswalk sign blinked to signal that he was able to cross the street, but he didn't move an inch. Staring down at the screen of his cell phone, he closed his eyes for a moment. Upon opening them, he had turned away from the crosswalk and headed back in the direction he had originally come from.
And I am torn to do what I have to.
The scream had been a good release for only a moment. Yosuke was trying to remain as calm as possible, breathing in and out slowly as he felt like he had to get away from that spot before he completely lost himself.
Taking off in a run, he turned to start down the street to the shopping district. No destination in mind, he just needed to find a distraction while his music tried to soothe the emotions that were becoming far too raw.
Down the streets, every glance made at anything he saw had some sort of attachment to the one he was trying so desperately not to think of. Every remembrance was like another stab in his chest. He should've just gone home, but he didn't think he could handle just staying in his room and staring at the nothingness around him. It would surely drive him insane.
The shrine appeared. Slowing a bit, he walked up the steps before moving to sit at a nearby bench.
He sat there for what felt like hours. Brown eyes remained unmoving from the starry sky above, but a nudge at his knee got his attention sometime during his sitting.
A familiar-looking fox was sitting in front of him. Feeling strangely connected to the animal, his hand moved to pet the top of fox's head gently.
"Hey there. Wanna keep me company?"
The fox slowly knelt down into a laying position, its eyes remaining fixated on the human.
"It must be so easy being you." Yosuke tugged a bit at the string of his headphones as he looked away while speaking still. "I bet you could handle this better than I can."
Tilting its head almost curiously, the man took this as a cue to explain further.
"I lost my best friend today. Well not really lost, but, he's pretty much gone from my life now." Laughing lightly mostly out of embarrassment and regret, he clutched a little at his upper thighs. "And I didn't tell him something really important."
The fox got back on its feet slowly.
"He might not have ever understood it, but I should have at least said it since I don't know when I'll ever see him again. Hell it probably doesn't even matter."
He had clouded his judgment with thoughts that his best friend was going back to the city and that he would probably just end up forgetting about all of them soon enough. It pained him the most to think he would be replaced, it's not like he was something special anyway.
Brown eyes looked up to see the fox scurrying away down the stone steps to exit the shrine.
Waiting for your call, I'm sick
Call I'm angry
Call, I'm desperate for your voice.
So many thoughts were building up in the traveling man's mind and then completely falling apart again. His phone was on low battery, barely staying on as he had just used a majority of the battery life on a phone call. It was been nerve-wracking and argumentative, but in the end he had won.
It had been the harshest realization of his life so far. The fact that it was so dire, so necessary to take action immediately, he had to gather his thoughts properly in the meantime.
They were all there, pieces of a puzzle just waiting to be put together. All the time they spent together, surely it wasn't just another close bond like the rest of the group. That was the one piece that didn't fit.
It was only a matter of time. Just a matter of time before-everything slowly came to a halt.
Cause every breath that you will take
When you are sitting next to me
Will bring life into my deepest hopes.
"Man, even a fox can't stand being around me."
The lone figure at the shrine mumbled lowly and remained seated for another ten minutes or so. Shuffling back up to the standing position, he determined that it was probably time for him to head home. The hour was reaching late, and he knew his parents would be home from work soon.
Moving past the bench, his feet approached the top of the stone steps. Staring at the ground, he started to descend the first step when he glanced up.
The shock of what he saw made him halt at the top of the stairs.
Standing still with his chest heaving as an obvious pattern of uneasy breathing, Yu stared over at the figure shadowed slightly a few steps away from him.
"Yu…what-I mean-"
Yosuke was trying to understand if what he was seeing was real. His words were tripping over themselves as he tried to keep his voice steady.
"I got back to the city. After walking about a block from the station, I realized I didn't want to be walking alone."
"I don't under-"
"You also never told me what you wanted to tell me earlier."
Yosuke had barely managed to sputter out his previous reply. Now he stood still, tensing up as he tried to focus on the right words to say.
His best friend had just hopped on a train back from the city just to come here in that moment. It was obvious that he had just ran here from the station, and he had gone straight to him first.
Swallowing uneasily, Yosuke could feel his heart racing far too fast. His palms were coated with sweat as he could feel nothing but nervousness wash over him. It was now or never.
"I-wanted..I wanted to tell you that I'm really glad I met you. You helped me become a better person, and you made me feel like I could actually rely on another person." His hand fisted slightly as he tried to keep his voice from breaking. "But over time, something changed. I-I know that I acted weird about some things, but I was trying to figure out what it was, it was like the most annoying thing, you know?"
"But I figured it out a while ago. I wanted to tell you before you left, but looking back now, I don't think it would even really matter if I had said it."
"Anything you say matters to me."
Yosuke stared at those grey eyes, feeling his defenses crumbling in less than a second of hearing those words. His brown eyes shadowed a glass-like vision as he felt overwhelmed with too many emotions.
"I wanted to tell you-I wanted to tell you that I love you!"
Those words broke through the atmosphere between them.
A tear fell down that fair-skin face as Yosuke stood there, waiting for some kind of reaction. It was torture just seeing the other standing there completely still.
The figure of Narukami Yu began to move. His feet took one step up the first step, then onto the second, the third came after that, and within seconds he was standing on the same level as the other man.
Those brown eyes stared at him, as if to desperately be waiting for some kind of negative reaction.
With his face as stoic as ever, a series of words began to be heard from the taller figure.
"I just took a three hour train ride back here because I realized that I didn't want to lose you. You're everything to me, and I didn't see it until you weren't by my side anymore."
Tears openly fell from Yosuke's eyes as he tried not to start sobbing at the realness in the words being said to him.
"I don't want to be without you. Ever."
Yu took a step forward, closing more distance between them. Those tears glimmered in the moonlight, he could see it with every centimeter that he tilted his head in.
Pressing the softest of kisses to those lips, Yu traced his hands around the lithe figure. He pulled him close, holding him in an embrace that was similar to that of when their bond became very close.
That warmth radiated around him, and Yosuke was losing himself in the moment entirely. It felt so right being in his arms, and now to feel lips pressing onto his own.
To say it was perfect was too simple. It was like they had been two parts that were waiting to find each other. Two magnets that when drawn apart would only gravitate to one another again at the realization that nothing would ever be as great unless they were together.
Nothing was the same without the other there. They'd already fought so many battles, shed so much blood, and now they had every right to have the one thing they were so desperately wanting.
Yu pressed more into the kiss, feeling that sense of passion overtaking his senses as he could feel the other gripping onto the front of his shirt. Every pressing of lips had a hidden meaning, as if to say, don't ever leave me again, I won't lose you, stay with me.
Feeling suffocated, but in a good way, they pulled away while keeping their faces lingering close.
"I love you Yosuke."
A hand reached up, brushing a stray lock of auburn hair from a gaze of brown that was still slightly tearful from happiness now.
"How long are you here for?"
"I'm here forever."
"W-what?"
Half-way smiling and smirking, Yu could see the shock in those eyes he loved to stare into.
"It took a while, but I convinced my parents to let me stay."
"Seriously?"
"Let me confirm this with something besides words then since I know you're slow sometimes."
Another kiss was placed on pink lips as Yosuke felt himself smiling and gripping with all the strength he had onto the one he loved. It was surreal, yet amazing. They'd never have to part, and they could always continue living every day together, always being happy together.
The shadowy figure of the fox stood at the edge of the sidewalk that led from the train station. Howling lowly, another day's duty had been done. And all was right with the world in which they lived.
I was born to tell you I love you.
~ fin