Well, this concept has probably been done millions of times before, but I
saw the Butterfly Effect recently and a scene in it sparked me to write it.
Good movie by the way, it's gotten some hardcore bad reviews but I thought
it was great! 3 Ashton 3
Anyway, I hope you like it and will give me feedback
Sirius, James and Peter looked up as the portrait hole shut with a slam, causing the fat lady to emit a scream heard from inside. They then caught sight of a very upset Remus Lupin storming past them and racing up the stairs. Once he was out of sight they all looked at each other, confusion evident on their faces.
"What was that all about?" James asked, almost amusedly.
"Not a clue," Peter squeaked.
"Remus never acts like that. Something must have happened. What do you bet it has to do with Brie?" Sirius replied, looking slightly worried. Remus was head over heals in love with Brianna Jones and the marauders all knew that she was beginning to get suspicious of where he disappeared to every month.
"Yah, it must be her."
"I think we should go check on him," Sirius decided. The other two looked apprehensive about the idea. "What?" he added.
"You know how Remus is when he gets mad....I don't think it's a good idea to talk to him until he cools off a bit." James replied cautiously.
"James have we ever seen Remus that upset?!"
James and Peter shook their heads.
"So this is obviously different..."
"Sorry Sirius, you go right ahead, but I think we should wait a bit."
Sirius threw up his arms and stood up, making his way over to the stairs leading to the boys dormitory. He opened the door and peered in but didn't see Remus anywhere. He walked all the way into the room but still saw no sign of Remus. He then looked to the bathroom and walked in. There was a puddle forming from one of the bathtubs and he could hear that the water was still running.
Knowing exactly what must have happened Sirius rushed forward and threw back the shower curtain where he saw Remus, fully clothed and fully submerged in the water. He wasn't moving.
"Oh my God!" Sirius muttered and quickly turned the knobs off and unplugged the drain. He then pulled Remus up so that his head was out of the water. At first it seemed that Remus was already dead and Sirius was really beginning to panic. However, Remus's eyes shot open, followed by a sharp intake of breath. Remus then began to cough up all the water from his lungs and tears began to fall down his face.
"Oh thank God!" Sirius muttered, wrapping his arms around Remus's neck and burying his face in his wet hair. "What the fuck were you doing there Remus. Why are you doing this?!"
Remus's face crumpled and he began to sob. "Brie-broke-up-with me..." The water was now down around his waste and he slumped back down into the bathtub.
"Why? What happened?"
"She-thinks that I-that I've been cheating-on her."
"Why would she think that?"
"Full moon," Remus moaned.
"Maybe you should tell her?"
Remus sat up straight and shook his head vigorously. "No! She can't ever know. I'd rather she think I'm cheating on her than have her know...she- she's said things about werewolves-after that lesson in defense. She thinks they should all be-all be killed." Remus leaned his head back against the tub and cried some more.
Sirius sighed. "Why do you want to be with someone who thinks that of people like you?"
"Because I love her," Remus moaned in a most heartbreaking tone. The water was now completely drained from the tub.
"I know you do mate, but there are millions of other girls out there...some of them probably won't mind werewolves either! Cheer up Rem. I know it hurts now but...it'll get better. You don't want to end your life now!"
"Yes I do Sirius," he sobbed. "Please go away and let me refill this fucking tub!"
"Remus...I can't believe you're doing this to yourself...and to everyone else around you! You've come such a long way here at Hogwarts and you're going to let it end here? Over some girl?! I didn't think you could be this selfish," Sirius nearly yelled.
"Selfish?! How the hell am I being selfish Sirius? I suffer more than any other person in this school. I have to hide a deadly secret from everyone! I'm a constant risk to every person here! If anything I'm doing everyone a favor by ending my life before I can do any of the damage that I have the potential to create."
"What about me? What about the marauders. There isn't a Prongs, a Wormtail, or a Padfoot without a Moony. We'd all be completely lost without you Rem. How can you even think of just leaving us like that?" Sirius asked, tears welling in his own eyes.
"I just don't want to hurt anymore," Remus moaned and buried his face in his knees, clothes squishing as he moved.
Sirius knelt close to the tubs edge and rubbed Remus's soaking wet back. "Before this whole thing with Brie your pain was tolerable, right Rem?"
Remus nodded.
"Because we helped you get through it, right?"
Again Remus nodded.
"What makes you think we can't help you get through this?"
Remus lifted his head and stared at Sirius with his bloodshot eyes.
"At least let us give it a shot," Sirius said lightly giving Remus his trademark smile. "Now get out of that fucking tub!"
With redness tinting his cheeks Remus slowly stood. He was shaking slightly so Sirius grabbed his hands to keep him upright. Once the two were several feet from the bathtub Sirius muttered a drying spell.
"There," he said. "Good as new."
Remus looked down and said sadly, "Not yet."
"I know, Rem, I know. But you'll get over her and you'll find someone else. You're a good catch."
"Nah...I think I'm done with girls for a while. I seem to get a little too attached."
"That you do, that you do."
Remus sighed so deeply it was as though the weight of the world was on his shoulders. He looked up at Sirius again, his lip quivering.
"Hey," Sirius said quietly pulling Remus into a tight embrace. "It's going to be alright mate. You'll see."
Remus nodded violently and began to cry again.
"Shhhh," Sirius murmured comfortingly, rubbing Remus's back softly. They stood like that for a long time, until Remus's tears again ran dry.
"The next couple of weeks are going to be hard Rem, but you can and WILL make it through them. Come to me whenever you need me and promise me you'll stay away from the bathtub. You are to stick to showers is that understood?"
Remus laughed into Sirius's shoulder and nodded.
"Do you promise not to attempt this again?"
Pulling back slightly Remus looked up into Sirius's face and thought for a moment. "Yeah, I promise."
"Good...because if you were gone I'd really miss you a whole lot!" Sirius said in a childish voice, trying to lighten the mood.
"Shall we go downstairs? I'm not particularly fond of standing in the bathroom."
"I think I'm just going to go lay down in my bed till dinner."
"Do you want me to stay with you?"
"You don't have to," Remus said looking down.
"I will anyway, just until you fall asleep. Sound good?"
Remus nodded and the two left the bathroom.
After removing his robes Remus crawled into his bed. Sirius dragged a chair up and sat beside him.
"Do you need anything Rem?"
"No, thanks though...for everything."
"It's my pleasure Mr. Moony."
Remus smiled at him genuinely, but the smile didn't last long.
"Sirius, you're not going to tell the others...are you?"
"Not if you don't want me to. This can be our little secret. But if you try it again I will tell James and Peter. I don't think you'll be doing it again though. Did you really want to die?"
"I don't know...I really just wanted all this—shit to go away, you know? Death seemed like the only way to make things better." His voice cracked but he didn't cry again.
"Yah but you wouldn't have been able to enjoy not having all that shit...you wouldn't be able to enjoy anything."
"You're right...it seemed like that would be better than suffering but...I suppose it wouldn't be. I wish I had talked to you before this...I feel like such a...dork."
Sirius laughed. "You are a dork...and that's why we like you."
Remus smiled and closed his eyes. "Do you promise everything will be okay Sirius?"
"Yah, Rem I do."
With his eyes still closed Remus nodded his head and then drifted off into peaceful painless sleep, while Sirius thought bitterly, "And what if I had followed James and Peter's cowardess?"
To be continued or not to be continued??? Please review and tell me what you think. I think this little ficcy can easily stand alone, but if enough people want it I can create a little more. I can also make it a slash fic or leave it as is. Just let me know what you think!
Anyway, I hope you like it and will give me feedback
Sirius, James and Peter looked up as the portrait hole shut with a slam, causing the fat lady to emit a scream heard from inside. They then caught sight of a very upset Remus Lupin storming past them and racing up the stairs. Once he was out of sight they all looked at each other, confusion evident on their faces.
"What was that all about?" James asked, almost amusedly.
"Not a clue," Peter squeaked.
"Remus never acts like that. Something must have happened. What do you bet it has to do with Brie?" Sirius replied, looking slightly worried. Remus was head over heals in love with Brianna Jones and the marauders all knew that she was beginning to get suspicious of where he disappeared to every month.
"Yah, it must be her."
"I think we should go check on him," Sirius decided. The other two looked apprehensive about the idea. "What?" he added.
"You know how Remus is when he gets mad....I don't think it's a good idea to talk to him until he cools off a bit." James replied cautiously.
"James have we ever seen Remus that upset?!"
James and Peter shook their heads.
"So this is obviously different..."
"Sorry Sirius, you go right ahead, but I think we should wait a bit."
Sirius threw up his arms and stood up, making his way over to the stairs leading to the boys dormitory. He opened the door and peered in but didn't see Remus anywhere. He walked all the way into the room but still saw no sign of Remus. He then looked to the bathroom and walked in. There was a puddle forming from one of the bathtubs and he could hear that the water was still running.
Knowing exactly what must have happened Sirius rushed forward and threw back the shower curtain where he saw Remus, fully clothed and fully submerged in the water. He wasn't moving.
"Oh my God!" Sirius muttered and quickly turned the knobs off and unplugged the drain. He then pulled Remus up so that his head was out of the water. At first it seemed that Remus was already dead and Sirius was really beginning to panic. However, Remus's eyes shot open, followed by a sharp intake of breath. Remus then began to cough up all the water from his lungs and tears began to fall down his face.
"Oh thank God!" Sirius muttered, wrapping his arms around Remus's neck and burying his face in his wet hair. "What the fuck were you doing there Remus. Why are you doing this?!"
Remus's face crumpled and he began to sob. "Brie-broke-up-with me..." The water was now down around his waste and he slumped back down into the bathtub.
"Why? What happened?"
"She-thinks that I-that I've been cheating-on her."
"Why would she think that?"
"Full moon," Remus moaned.
"Maybe you should tell her?"
Remus sat up straight and shook his head vigorously. "No! She can't ever know. I'd rather she think I'm cheating on her than have her know...she- she's said things about werewolves-after that lesson in defense. She thinks they should all be-all be killed." Remus leaned his head back against the tub and cried some more.
Sirius sighed. "Why do you want to be with someone who thinks that of people like you?"
"Because I love her," Remus moaned in a most heartbreaking tone. The water was now completely drained from the tub.
"I know you do mate, but there are millions of other girls out there...some of them probably won't mind werewolves either! Cheer up Rem. I know it hurts now but...it'll get better. You don't want to end your life now!"
"Yes I do Sirius," he sobbed. "Please go away and let me refill this fucking tub!"
"Remus...I can't believe you're doing this to yourself...and to everyone else around you! You've come such a long way here at Hogwarts and you're going to let it end here? Over some girl?! I didn't think you could be this selfish," Sirius nearly yelled.
"Selfish?! How the hell am I being selfish Sirius? I suffer more than any other person in this school. I have to hide a deadly secret from everyone! I'm a constant risk to every person here! If anything I'm doing everyone a favor by ending my life before I can do any of the damage that I have the potential to create."
"What about me? What about the marauders. There isn't a Prongs, a Wormtail, or a Padfoot without a Moony. We'd all be completely lost without you Rem. How can you even think of just leaving us like that?" Sirius asked, tears welling in his own eyes.
"I just don't want to hurt anymore," Remus moaned and buried his face in his knees, clothes squishing as he moved.
Sirius knelt close to the tubs edge and rubbed Remus's soaking wet back. "Before this whole thing with Brie your pain was tolerable, right Rem?"
Remus nodded.
"Because we helped you get through it, right?"
Again Remus nodded.
"What makes you think we can't help you get through this?"
Remus lifted his head and stared at Sirius with his bloodshot eyes.
"At least let us give it a shot," Sirius said lightly giving Remus his trademark smile. "Now get out of that fucking tub!"
With redness tinting his cheeks Remus slowly stood. He was shaking slightly so Sirius grabbed his hands to keep him upright. Once the two were several feet from the bathtub Sirius muttered a drying spell.
"There," he said. "Good as new."
Remus looked down and said sadly, "Not yet."
"I know, Rem, I know. But you'll get over her and you'll find someone else. You're a good catch."
"Nah...I think I'm done with girls for a while. I seem to get a little too attached."
"That you do, that you do."
Remus sighed so deeply it was as though the weight of the world was on his shoulders. He looked up at Sirius again, his lip quivering.
"Hey," Sirius said quietly pulling Remus into a tight embrace. "It's going to be alright mate. You'll see."
Remus nodded violently and began to cry again.
"Shhhh," Sirius murmured comfortingly, rubbing Remus's back softly. They stood like that for a long time, until Remus's tears again ran dry.
"The next couple of weeks are going to be hard Rem, but you can and WILL make it through them. Come to me whenever you need me and promise me you'll stay away from the bathtub. You are to stick to showers is that understood?"
Remus laughed into Sirius's shoulder and nodded.
"Do you promise not to attempt this again?"
Pulling back slightly Remus looked up into Sirius's face and thought for a moment. "Yeah, I promise."
"Good...because if you were gone I'd really miss you a whole lot!" Sirius said in a childish voice, trying to lighten the mood.
"Shall we go downstairs? I'm not particularly fond of standing in the bathroom."
"I think I'm just going to go lay down in my bed till dinner."
"Do you want me to stay with you?"
"You don't have to," Remus said looking down.
"I will anyway, just until you fall asleep. Sound good?"
Remus nodded and the two left the bathroom.
After removing his robes Remus crawled into his bed. Sirius dragged a chair up and sat beside him.
"Do you need anything Rem?"
"No, thanks though...for everything."
"It's my pleasure Mr. Moony."
Remus smiled at him genuinely, but the smile didn't last long.
"Sirius, you're not going to tell the others...are you?"
"Not if you don't want me to. This can be our little secret. But if you try it again I will tell James and Peter. I don't think you'll be doing it again though. Did you really want to die?"
"I don't know...I really just wanted all this—shit to go away, you know? Death seemed like the only way to make things better." His voice cracked but he didn't cry again.
"Yah but you wouldn't have been able to enjoy not having all that shit...you wouldn't be able to enjoy anything."
"You're right...it seemed like that would be better than suffering but...I suppose it wouldn't be. I wish I had talked to you before this...I feel like such a...dork."
Sirius laughed. "You are a dork...and that's why we like you."
Remus smiled and closed his eyes. "Do you promise everything will be okay Sirius?"
"Yah, Rem I do."
With his eyes still closed Remus nodded his head and then drifted off into peaceful painless sleep, while Sirius thought bitterly, "And what if I had followed James and Peter's cowardess?"
To be continued or not to be continued??? Please review and tell me what you think. I think this little ficcy can easily stand alone, but if enough people want it I can create a little more. I can also make it a slash fic or leave it as is. Just let me know what you think!