Her name was Felicia. For him, it did not matter. She was the one he wanted but could not have. She didn't want him.
He obsessed over her, dreamt of her, yearned for her. But for nothing.
She was tall and leggy. Curvy in the right way. She looked a little like Kate but more like Abby minus the tattoos and the stud collar.
They sat in the car while Gibbs was in a Starbucks getting them all coffee. Normally DiNozzo would get it or make McGee do it but McGee told him he wanted to talk. So Tony feigned a cramp in his hamstring. Gibbs just huffed at him and went in himself.
"Tony, I still see her in my dreams. I don't even feel an attraction but I still want her anyway. It cannot be explained."
"You know I've had women like that too, McFreak. They hold on to you. Or rather you hold onto them," Tony said.
"How do I let it go?" McGee asked.
That was the one thing dinozzo never knew how to do. He just moved to the next person in line. What choice did he have? It would rip him something, especially whenever he thought of Jeanne. How could it not? He felt something for her and in the end it was all supposed to be a lie. But it was not it. It was something real but it was based on a lie.
"This is gonna sound sappy but you gotta give yourself the time to feel the loss..."
Gibbs was sitting in back of them. He smiled and looked at McGee.
"You never let go. You just put it behind you," Gibbs said. "Let's go."
Tony hit the pedal and McGee spilled his coffee on his tie.