Note: I'm baaack XD (Is anybody still here from the Death Note fandom? wave at me!)

I suppose you didn't expect me here after so long, but truth is, my fics projects were bugging me, this particular idea is from 2012 I believe, and I need to write something that's not writing for a living (I love my job but I just need to relax with a story I can fuck up if I want lol).
And to the person that thought my MattxMello fandom had died, well, it's not even close to happen, sorry!

No schedule so I can't say how many chapters (did I ever respect a number I gave anyway?) and when I'll update, though I'm aiming at weekly.
I was first thinking of updating Lithium, I know it's not over, but I cringed when reading it again lately and I need to rewrite what's already posted before I ever think of writing further.

And shameless self ad: my book is on Amazon (digital) and you can ask me for the paperback version (it's available both in French and English). PM me for details.

Sixteen.

Two more years to go.

She had made a cake. My first birthday cake ever, and I was wary. She wouldn't buy me like that. I thanked her, blew the candles, and ate in silence while they babbled about my new life here. I didn't even feel concerned, but they were so caught up in their enthusiasm that they didn't even notice that I was staying silent.

I was hungry, and they let me eat as much cake as I wanted. Still not buying it.
Then they let me free to go rest in my room.
I went upstairs, and began to put the content of my small bag into drawers. It was probably useless, I wouldn't stay long, as usual. But she had told me to, so I did it. She had even put scented little bags in the drawers.

When I was done, I sat on my new bed, which was a little too comfortable to be true, and looked by the window. Similar houses were aligned along the whole street. Neat, clean fronts, groomed gardens, nice-looking people going about their businesses, neighbours chatting over fences, dogs, modern cars...

I wouldn't get used to it, no need to, the good stuff and me weren't from the same world, and soon I'd be out of here. It was just a matter of time.
Two years to go, God only knew how many relocations, and I'd be legal and out of the system.
If only... things hadn't happened... I would be out already, sixteen was freedom for us, unless we had fucked up.

And I had. Would I do it all the same way? Probably. Not that I had had a choice anyway, so better not dwell on it and take those two more years like a man.

I waited, it was barely 3pm and I had no idea what to do with myself. So I just sat there til dinner time.
She called me and I went downstairs.

Too many smiles, and I couldn't help the sick feeling in my gut. Too chatty, too friendly, too much of everything. But I knew better than to say anything. I ate, answered politely, and excused myself as soon as I could.

Not tired. I sat there some more but grew bored. The clock ticked 9pm only, but I went to bed nonetheless, there wasn't much else I could do.

I woke up by the sound of her calling my name from the other side of the door.
I showered and got dressed as asked, and joined them for breakfast.

I didn't know how long it would last, so as long as food was provided, I would eat.
"You need to put some meat around those bones!" she said.
I stopped chewing for two seconds, but her attention was somewhere else already so I decided to ignore the comment. I glanced at him but he was simply reading the newspapers, not paying attention to me.
I resumed eating, and helped her wash the dishes afterwards.

"Why don't you take a walk and have a look around the neighbourhood?"
"Ok." And I left, sliding the key she gave to me in my rear pocket. I wasn't surprised that they tested me, but I was that they chose this - the key to their own house - to do so. But I would pass that test easily, I wasn't about to fuck up this time. I had absolutely no plan on pushing the day I'd be free to a further date.
But it meant one thing: they were starting strong, and I had to be careful.

That had been a very bad idea.
Conversations over fences stopped, faces appeared behind windows. I was blending in this neighbourhood like herpes on a face.
I couldn't blame them, I wasn't particularly pampered to begin with, my long hair was ragged, my clothes worn out, my shoes ready to fall apart, and my face... let's say I was odd to look at.
I kept on walking until I had effectively made the whole circle around the neighbourhood, and went back to the house of my new caretakers. I was about to use my key to get inside when I heard them talk.

"Are you sure it was a good idea?" he was asking.
"We'll see... we can't choose which kid we get anyway, so let's give this one a chance, he will get used to us, give him time."
"Let's hope so... he's not exactly what I had imagined, that's all."
"I know, I thought we'd be in charge of a younger kid, and not... with this past, but now it's done so we'll make do."
"At least drive him to the mall and get him some decent clothes and shoes, he looks like a beaten stray cat."
"That's what I had planned," she laughed.

They were now silent so I deemed it safe to enter.
"Ah, Mihael, right on time, let's go, we need to fill those drawers of yours with something else than rags!"
I swallowed hard, but I followed her to her car.

It was so clean inside that car, and the same scent than those little bags in my drawer filled the space. She put the music on, and sang along.
"Sing with me Mihael!" she said joyfully, and I caved in. Playing nice, too nice, it became obvious. Subtlety wasn't apparently their thing but at least it meant they weren't going straight for it, they tried to fool me into trusting them first.

The mall. The nightmare began.
"Don't you want a bit of color?" she asked, handing me a red tee shirt.
I looked briefly at her and shook my head.
"Black it is then," she sighed, and pushed me to the changing room. My eyes went wide.
"I don't need to try them on."
She looked at me, surprised, probably gauging my expression, that was certainly a little wild at that moment, but she retaliated and headed for the cashier.

The drive back was silent. Now, things were a bit more normal, at least my kind of normal: I had scared her and I knew how to deal with that. I didn't deal with nice very well.
She parked in front of the house, asking me to take the bags off the trunk, and as I was doing so, I heard a guitar. I looked in the direction of the sound, it seemed to come from the house on the other side of the street.

"Mihael, come inside," she said, and I could hear in her tone that fear was gone and her enthusiasm back. Fuck.
I complied, and went upstairs to put everything away, changing into new clothes as she requested, then coming back in the living room where she was sitting with her husband.
"You really need to eat more to fill those new clothes," he laughed, and I scowled at him. He didn't take me seriously though, and resumed reading whatever he was reading before his wife and I arrived back here.
She patted the couch right next to her, but I sat in an armchair, further.
She ticked but soon she was concentrated on her TV show.

I felt really out of place in this family. I didn't even know how my 'case' had made it to such a fancy neighbourhood, such a normal family. The people that usually volunteered to host kids like me were doing it for money, which told a lot about their ways of dealing with said kids once we were placed there: they took the money, and left us barely fed or cared for. Good families were for good kids, so either they weren't as clean as they seemed to be, or they had been lied to about me. But I doubted the second option very much because of what I had heard earlier.

"It seems the Allens got a kid after all."
"Huh?" my dad stood up, probably to look by the window with my mum.
"They volunteered to be a host family, remember? There's a kid with Mrs Allen, they just got out of the car," my mum explained.
"Ah, yes... but maybe it's just family, stop spying like this," he laughed, and her own laughter replied to his.
"What is he like?" I couldn't help but ask.
"I didn't really see, only his back, a teenager I think, long blond hair... I'm not even sure if it was a girl or a boy. But so skinny!"

I wondered briefly about this new kid, how old he or she was, and if we'd be going to the same school, but I eventually resumed playing on my guitar, knowing that my dad had probably sat at the kitchen table again, to listen, because he liked it when I played and for once he wasn't working.

I woke up early the next day. Despite the fact that it was Sunday, I could never sleep really late. I was so engrossed in learning guitar and getting better at it that my mum had threatened to lock up the instrument from 8pm to 8am so I would at least not play at hours when the neighbours could complain.
My parents had gotten me this guitar for my fifteenth birthday in February, and I had barely been able to keep my hands off of it since. I had finally found something that got me excited, and that I could do on my own.
I sat on my bed, already impatient to play, and practiced for a moment.

I suddenly started to feel a freezing wind coming from the open window. I stood up to close it.
It was cold outside even for December in California, way too cold to play in the basement. I usually hung out there not to annoy my parents too much, because my dad's office being right next door to my room, he wouldn't be able to work with the music.
Going downstairs, I asked my mum if it was okay to play in my room just today, I really wanted to finish learning this new song I was on.
"Actually, your dad thought about that, he has a little surprise for you, but you won't know until you finish your plate sweetheart!"
No need to say I swallowed my pancakes in less than five minutes, jumping on my feet as soon as I was done.
"Teeth," my dad said, and I knew better than to oppose, despite my impatience, so I complied and came back as fast as possible.

Holding my dad's arm, we crossed the backyard to the little barn at the end of it. The doors creaked open, and he pushed me inside.
I immediately noticed that the smell had changed. It used to smell of old wood, but now it smelled of varnish and brand new furniture. And it was warm inside. I didn't need more to know that he had completely revamped the barn.
"I thought you'd like this more than the basement," my dad had a smile in his voice.
I threw myself at him, encircling his waist and hugging him as strong as I could. He was the most awesome dad in the whole world.
He laughed loudly, ruffling my hair.

I explored every nook and cranny, slowly, feeling the soft fabric of the couch under my fingers, the smoothness of the wooden coffee table, the shelves... It was perfect.
"There's no electricity because the city planning doesn't allow it but I guess it's not a problem. But you do have heat, I isolated it and linked the hydrolic heating of the house to the floor."
"So the day I fell in the grass this fall because there were holes everywhere, it wasn't moles." I laughed, happy as a king.

My mum had me help her with various things before lunch, then after we ate, I could finally inaugurate my new lair, my guitar and a few books with me. It wasn't as warm as in the house, but it was still nice with my thick hoodie on, and to be honest, it was good to have a place that, even if still on my parents' property, was a bit isolated and allowed me to be unsupervised.

I practiced until my fingers started to hurt, and my mum, probably hearing that I had stopped playing, soon showed up with a hot drink and cookies. She was the best.
"So, I take it we won't be seeing you much from now on?" she teased me.
"That depends on how many times you bring me cookies." I teased her back, earning myself an indignant huff and a laughter.
"Okay, I have to think about dinner, I'll ring you when it's ready honey, but if you're cold, come back home immediately, I don't want you to catch a cold."
"Okaaay mum." I sighed. She couldn't help but treat me like a five year old.

I wasn't allowed to go back to the barn after dinner, my parents refused that I stayed there after dark, at least during winter. I went to my room, brooding a little, but I know they were right. So I simply went over a few lessons, after all I had a test on Monday.

Music woke me up. The same guitar I had heard yesterday when coming back from the mall, it seemed. I stayed under the covers, the bed way too comfortable to move, listening. I suddenly started, realising I was slowly drifting back to sleep. Too comfortable, that wasn't good. I stood up, stirring, and noticed that there was someone in the room parallel to mine, in the house on the other side of the street. The window was slightly open, and there was someone playing the guitar, sitting on the bed. He played pretty well.

I listened for a moment, opening my own window, but he stopped and came to close his just as I did. He didn't even spare me a look although it was impossible for him not to see me. I guess I would have to get used to get that treatment from people here, I really wasn't from the same world. Jerk.

I showered, got dressed, joined the Allens for breakfast, already hating the routine after two days.
I was supposed to start school the next day, and I was pissed.
At least, in the center where I came from, we had lessons given at the center, we didn't have to attend a school, and before that, I had skipped school so much I can't recall doing a full year anywhere. I hated school: it was boring, and people sucked. And as my record stated, I had a problem with authority.

I heard the guitar for hours during the afternoon, and I hated that I liked it, knowing the guy playing was a moron.

Monday. School. Great.
My new caretaker drove me, and it was lucky because taking the bus, with all the other kids. Nope. I'd rather walk.
He tried to chat during the drive but he had at least understood by now that I wasn't a talker, so he gave up after a few minutes, and left me in front of the school while he went to the principal's office to take care of a few papers concerning me.

I wanted to be anywhere else than here, but I had promised myself that I would not fuck up, so I searched for my class, avoiding other people as much as I could, ignoring the weird looks they gave me and whispers in my back.
I seemed to have found the right way to go when something hit my leg.
I turned around, ready to spit venom, but I ended up face to face with the guy from the other side of the street, who was already apologizing for poking me with his... white cane?