Disclaimer: I don't own Invader Zim. And I sure don't own the concept of karma.

Dibsthe1 is seated on a cushion on the floor, at a low Korean style table. Turns to face the reader.

To those who know anything at all about writing (Hi Maran Zelde!), at least one Invader Zim episode feels exactly like a Monday morning writers' warm up exercise. You know... a pad of paper goes around and around the table with everybody reading only the final previous line before adding the zaniest, most ill-fitting thing he or she can think of. When the IZ crew tried this once too often, the resulting mishmash somehow ended up in the hands of the Fuckelodeon butchers who insisted it be force-fed through the animation process to be excreted out the other end as "Taster of Pork."

A Long Tall Drink of Salt Water

Reeking worse than he had ever imagined anything could reek, Dib dragged himself home. Now that, cleaning out the pig toilet, THAT has been a truly horrific experience. The only thing Dib now wanted was to stand beneath a fully opened shower for an hour or two.

But as Dib neared his family's house, instead of walking more quickly, he walked more and more slowly; finally, with only a few hundred feet to go, he stopped. Suppose she was still angry with him? Certainly she had punished him horribly, but suppose she wasn't finished yet?

She had mercilessly beaten him up herself, she had enjoyed herself while he was being beaten up all over again by the pig guards, and finally, despite his pleas on her behalf, she had viciously knifed him in the back by calling down still more punishment on him. Just where did her thirst for revenge end? The more Dib saw of it, the less certain he was that it did have an end, a point where Gaz would finally say, "Okay, that's enough."

Dib did well to ask this. Gaz was in no way finished yet. Oh, no.

She was just getting warmed up.

Just as a fire that is hot enough will feed on itself, so now did Gaz's inexhaustible desire for vengeance begin to feed on itself. By this time, her revenge had become its own justification, its own reason for itself.

- - - - - - - -

Professor Membrane was driving home from work. He felt pretty good about the way everything had gone this week. It was late, so his kids would probably be asleep by the time he got home, but he would look in on them. One of these days he might actually see them awake.

- - - - - - - -

Dib stood hesitating, bathed only by the wan moonlight, reluctant to enter the house to get the shower he craved so much. He could just visualize it: the second he opened the door, Gaz could well be flying into him in a towering rage, as eager to punish him as if she hadn't even started.

Suddenly Dib noticed the headlights of a car slowing as it approached the house, and knew the car was being driven by his father. He whirled around around looking for something to hide behind; he didn't want to go back into the house just yet. Gaz could act as if she was half-civilized as long as their father was around, but the second his back was turned, as often as not she switched back into a raging berserker.

Dib quickly found a bush to hide behind, and found a gap in the leaves through which to peer. As soon as the front door opened, the first half second before Gaz realized who was actually at the door would be Dib's chance to find out how angry she still was.

Had Dib been able to see through the door, he would have seen Gaz fuming as she kept piling one layer of explosives onto another before finally attaching a wire to the doorknob. Yes indeed, she was still mad.

As the Professor approached the door, Dib crouched down to watch more intently than ever. Whatever Gaz did in the first split second after the door opened, before she realized who it really was, that would tell Dib a lot about the state of mind she was in.

Finally the Professor got close enough to the door to open it. He heard the click which Dib was too far away to hear. And a tremendous explosion shook the neighborhood. The house and both its inhabitants were gone.

As Dib stared in dismay at the tall column of billowing smoke, the clouds opened, and the rain began to fall, slowly at first and then more and more heavily, washing away all the filth and reek contaminating him.

Even without the house, Dib was getting his shower after all.

The End

Revenge has no more quenching effect on emotions than salt water has on thirst.

--

Dibsthe1 decides that the pork has been sufficiently cooked and uses chopsticks to place several pieces of roasted meat on a wild sesame leaf which in turn rests on a leaf of lettuce. Dibsthe1 spoons samjang sauce onto the pork and curls up the entire assemblage... and takes a bite.

Mmmm... mm! Closes eyes and makes the thumbs up sign.

(Speaking with mouth full) You know, the pork is the best part.

The Karma Circle is now closed. Thank you and good evening.