Disclaimer: J.K. Rowlings has all copyrights and fame for Harry Potter and all related ideas. I will admit to borrowing her line "I never gave up on you" from HBP. What can I say it was perfect. I do not claim rights or genius related to the formentioned concepts, only to the ones that originated in my own head, the story/words surrounding the characters.
Author's Note: Yes, I was thrilled when Harry and Ginny got together in HBP but I'll admit that the romance wasn't really what I had in mind. But guess what? This story is…hmmm, maybe cause I wrote it. Please Review and tell me what you think. I'm still waiting for my Harry, my best friend, to hold me under the stars.
The Way it Should Be
Ginny lay in bed staring up at the ceiling, her eyes focusing on drifting shadows in the dark room. She could hear the shallow breathing of the other girls sleeping in their beds and the almost perfect silence created an ideal atmosphere for her thoughts to wander. A smile spread across Ginny's face as she lay wide awake on her bed. She had been smiling more lately than she had in a long time. It felt really good. She felt more like herself, more relaxed and carefree. Hermione and Ron had each caught Ginny walking around with a wide smile giggling to herself and had enquired about what was so funny. Ginny didn't have an answer except that she was happy. There wasn't really a reason for her to be so happy, she just felt happier. She had broken things off with Dean, maybe that was part of her new found happiness. She liked him well enough. It just seemed that he did so many annoying little things and treated her like she was made of glass. Ginny needed a guy who could trust her and let her work things out her own way but be there to help her if she needed it. And knowing Ginny, she probably would need it.
And then, she had noticed Harry looking at her more often. The few times she had caught his eye over the last few weeks she had noticed something in his eyes that she had never really seen before. Ginny found her thoughts turning to Harry as she looked up into the darkness, wishing she could see the stars shining over Hogwarts and feel Harry's arm around her as they lay snuggled together under the full moon.
Stop it Ginevra Molly Weasley! You can't think that way. You don't want to get hurt. Just forget about Harry Potter. You don't really think he sees you as more than a little sister do you? Come on Ginny don't even think about getting your hopes up just because you think you see something in his eyes.
Ginny shook her head slowly, the smile gradually disappearing off her face. She really didn't need to even think about guys right now, especially Harry. Ginny had been defining herself by relationships since third year when she started dating Michael Corner. She wanted to take some time to define herself without a boyfriend. She didn't know if it would take a few days, a week, a year, or longer but she knew that she was growing up and she wanted to change the way she had been focusing on relationships instead of concentrating on herself and those closest to her like Ron and her family, Hermione, and even Harry. After all, he was pretty much part of her family. Sure she liked having a boyfriend and she did sort of miss curling up in a cozy nook with Dean for some quality time, which basically translated into hiding from Ron and snogging. But Ginny decided she wanted more from a relationship than physical perks and a distraction from her true feelings for Harry. So it was pretty easy for her to break up with Dean and she didn't really miss his constant attention.
She knew that without a boyfriend she wouldn't be able to hide from her love for Harry or lie to herself about being over him. But she thought that she could deal with it now that she was at least being honest with herself about him. And maybe someday, if she couldn't be with Harry, she would find a man who she could feel the same way about, but until then she was through wasting her time on annoying boys.
Still wide awake Ginny got up quietly, grabbed a pillow, and pulling her blanket around her shoulders, snuck past the beds of her snoozing classmates, down the stairs, and into the Gryffindor common room.
"It's a beautiful night," Ginny whispered to herself, "and I'm not going to miss it."
She walked silently over to the portrait of the fat lady hanging over the entrance.
"Vermillion," Ginny said under her breath as she gently tapped the fat lady with her wand to awaken her.
"Wh..wha, huh?" groaned the fat lady as she blinked the sleep from her eyes and peered grumpily at the redheaded girl standing there in her pajamas and blanket cape.
"What's going on? Do you know what time it is? You aren't supposed to be out at this time of night." The fat lady yawned and started to shut her eyes again.
"I said vermillion now please let me out. And be quiet about it and don't wake anybody up or I will come back and turn your portrait black and white. It's a lovely night and I'm going to enjoy it."
Ginny held up her wand and pointed threateningly at the fat lady.
"Alright, alright calm down sweetie," grumbled the irate portrait. "But if you run into Filch or get into any mischief nobody can blame me."
"Yes fine," Ginny sighed. "Now please let me out."
With one last grumble the fat lady's portrait swung open and Ginny slipped noiselessly through the portrait hole.
Above in the boys' dormitory Harry rolled over in his bed. He slept fitfully almost waking as he tossed in his bed. A small almost inaudible sound escaped his lips.
"Ginny."
If only Ginny knew that Harry was dreaming of her as she moved softly away from Gryffindor tower and slid out the front doors of the castle and into the luscious green lawn. This knowledge might have brought the smile back to her freckled face and her eyes might have sparkled once again at the thought of Harry James Potter.
The moon was bright and full in the sky above Hogwarts and the stars twinkled playfully around it like dancers in some grand ballet. Soundlessly, Ginny moved over to the side lawn below Gryffindor tower and spread her blanket down on the perfect grass. She slipped her pillow under her head as she lay down, propping up her head to gaze skyward at the brilliant full moon and the dancing stars.
Ginny felt so alone and small under the vast expanse of stars and planets. She turned her head to look up at Gryffindor tower and up to her dormitory window. A salty tear of loneliness slid down her face and the stars blurred in her vision. Ginny had a lot of friends and she had become quite popular during her fifth year at Hogwarts. But friendship wasn't what Ginevra Weasley wanted anymore. She only wanted to be with one person. She wanted to spend every waking moment with one person. She wanted to fall asleep every night in his arms and wake up every morning to his touch. She wanted him to hold her tight and never let go. She wanted to be with the one person she could trust and love beyond human comprehension. Ginny knew she was ready to give all her kisses, all her heart, and all her soul to one person. The boy she had loved for six years. Harry Potter. Her love for him had grown every day since the moment she had seen him at platform 9 and 3/4. She willed herself to give up on Harry every day and tried to distract herself with other boys but not a day passed when Ginny didn't think about Harry and long to feel his touch. If Ginny was conscious she was thinking of Harry and at night she often dreamed of him. It was hard to keep hope alive after six years but Ginny couldn't get the "boy who lived" out of her head and heart no matter how hard she tried.
Ginny brushed the tears from her eyes. She wasn't going to cry over Harry tonight. She had cried too many silent tears on his behalf already. She was surprised that the world wasn't flooded because her heart certainly was. But tonight wasn't going to be ruined by what couldn't be. Ginny only wanted to see what possibilities the stars held.
Above Ginny's head, Harry had awaken from his restless sleep. He couldn't get the redheaded sister of his best friend out of his mind. Thoughts from his dream invaded his consciousness. He thought of Ginny lying in bed in the girls' dormitory and wondered if she could possibly be dreaming of him.
No, of course not. She gave up on me a long time ago. If only I had opened my eyes and my heart to what was right in front of me all these years we could have both gotten what we wanted. What we need.
"What I need is a good distraction," Harry thought to himself.
He slipped his wand out from under his pillow, drew back the curtains around his four-poster and looked over at Ron's bed. A wide grin spread across Harry's face when he saw that Ron had left his curtains open. Harry could see him sprawled out on the bed in a tangle of bedding, muttering under his breath.
"Wingardium Leviosa," Harry whispered pointing his wand at his quill. He guided it over towards Ron's bed until it hovered over his friend's unsuspecting face. With a flick of his wrist he turned his quill so that the eagle feather was right under Ron's nose.
"Rictusempra"
Harry's quill began to tickle under Ron's nose. His friend snorted in his sleep and tried to brush the quill away. Harry tried to hold in his laughter as he used his wand to guide the feathered quill away from Ron's swatting hands and back to tickle his nose. The sleeping Ron steadily started swinging wilder at the quill. Harry burst out laughing as Ron swung his arm with such force that he threw himself out of bed and landed with a thud on the dormitory floor. Ron awoke on impact looking like he was being attacked by Aragog and his band of spiders.
"Bloody hell, Harry," Ron moaned when he realized what his friend had been up to.
"Sorry mate," Harry managed through his laughter. "I couldn't sleep."
"Well, will you please go not sleep somewhere else? Your keeper needs his rest. Big match with Ravenclaw in a few hours you know."
"Yeah Ron, sorry."
Groggily, Ron pulled himself back up into bed and this time remembered to pull his curtains tight around his four poster. Harry smiled at his sleepy friend and felt a bit envious at Ron's ability to sleep so soundly. It must be nice to have nothing more to worry about than Quiddich. Of course Harry cared about the upcoming match, he was captain after all. But he was more consumed with thoughts of the girl that stirred his heart.
Harry had never expected to think of Ginny as more than a little sister. He was practically a Weasley after all. Harry remembered the shy little girl who used to look at him so adoringly and blush whenever he came around. The girl who knocked things over in his presence and couldn't bring herself to say a word to him.
Yes, Harry had always known Ginny's heart. He had witnessed her growing up and growing into a brave, caring woman. He had come to enjoy the moments when he got to talk to Ginny and she was a true ally when he was facing the evils of Lord Voldemort. He loved the fact that she had become more confident around him and over the last few years he had felt that she had become more of a friend then a little girl with a crush.
Harry slowly found himself feeling a little more than friendship towards Ginny. He didn't realize it at first but he saw such a difference in Ginny as she grew older and he really liked the woman that she was becoming. She was the kind of girl that he needed. He could see the degree of concern for him in her eyes and he knew that she would be there for him if he needed it. And she wasn't afraid to talk to him anymore, which was good because she often made good points and helped Harry see things more clearly. She knew the invasive presence of Lord Voldemort more than anyone else at Hogwart's, besides Harry. Harry knew that her own experiences made her more understanding of why Harry had to dedicate his life to saving the Wizarding World from the Dark Lord and his followers. He knew that Ginny would always understand his reasons and support him in what he felt he had to do.
Knowing sleep was a lost cause, Harry decided to go down to the common room so that he wouldn't be tempted to disturb any more of his roommates. He slid out of his bed and shivered slightly as his bare feet hit the cold floor. Harry pulled his dressing robe off the hook beside his bed and swung it around his shoulders. On his way towards the door he passed the bed of the once again sleeping Ron and chuckled to himself at his little nocturnal joke. As Harry passed Ron's bed a shiny wrapper caught his eye. Harry grinned.
Just what I need, a little midnight snack, Harry thought to himself as he scooped up a handful of chocolate frogs that had been residing on the top of Ron's trunk.
He's got gobs, he won't miss a few.
After his frog-napping detour Harry finally crept out of the dormitory and down the stairs into the common room. Harry glanced around the room lovingly before sinking down in his favorite armchair. The Gryffindor common room was one of Harry's favorite spots in the world. It was like an overgrown living room and Harry loved the family atmosphere that engulfed the place each day. There was almost always a friendly face to greet you once you maneuvered your way past the Fat Lady. The realities of the outside world seemed to melt away inside the walls of Gryffindor tower.
Harry treasured the social atmosphere of the common room and the company of his friends at Hogwarts but he also prized the solitary moments, like this night, that he found in the common room. He had enjoyed some private conversations with Ron and Hermione late at night inside these walls. But most of all, Harry Potter was grateful for a place to come sink in to a comfortable chair, and think. He had come here late at night many times since his first year. Harry found it a great escape when he couldn't sleep, usually because of the heavy burden of fighting Lord Voldemort or contemplating his fate and innate desire to save his magical world from evil.
More recently he had come here to think of something much more pleasant, if equally formidable, Ginny Weasley. Ginny seemed to occupy increasingly greater portions of Harry's waking thoughts and he usually came down to the common room to think after awakening from a dream in which, more likely than not, Ginny played a significant role. After many sleep deprived nights Harry thought that he had finally sorted out his feelings for the fiery redheaded girl. He couldn't say exactly when his view of her had changed. He only knew it had happened gradually the more time he spent around her.
It kind of snuck up on me. Before I knew what was happening little thoughts of Gin kept stealing into my head. I hardly realized I was over Cho before Ginny started inching her way into my heart. Its like I was asleep in my own world and when I finally woke up there was Ginny like she always is, only this time I opened my eyes. But I've had to hide my new awakened state because she was with Dean but now that they are broken up…well…oh, I'm probably crazy for even thinking this way. I should try and get her out of my head and my heart. But I just don't want to.
Amidst the dark and discouraging realities of the world, Harry needed to hold on to his fairy tale. He couldn't count how many times he stared at the chair opposite him and wished Ginny would stir in her bed upstairs and somehow feel compelled to come down to the common room, see him, and sit with him so that he could express his true feelings and search out hers.
The first thing Ginny saw when she stepped back through the portrait hole was a pair of bare feet sticking up over the back of an armchair across the room. Not in the mood to answer questions about her nocturnal wanderings she snuck soundlessly towards the stairs leading up to the girls' dormitory, hoping that the person belonging to those feet was asleep in the chair. She shot a quick glance in the direction of the occupied armchair and as she turned to look, her leg bumped into an end table sending a lamp crashing to the ground. Ginny let out a little yelp and looked across the room just in time to see a head pop up from its resting position in the armchair.
"Harry?" Ginny asked upon seeing the mess of black hair, lightening bolt scar, green eyes, and glasses appear in the same region the bare feet had been occupying.
"Gin? I should have known it was you causing such a disturbance," Harry replied chuckling.
Ginny blushed knowing Harry was referring to her habit of being extraordinarily clumsy whenever she was close to him.
"Harry James Potter, just what are you doing down here in the middle of the night?" Ginny asked defensively.
"Oh, a dream woke me up and I couldn't get back to sleep. Your brother isn't very good company when he is trying to sleep, he just can't seem to take a joke so late at night, so I came down here. I come and sit here at night sometimes when I need to think."
Harry got up from his chair and walked over to Ginny. He looked at her standing there in her pajamas with her blanket wrapped around her shoulders, holding her pillow tight against her chest. She was watching him cross the room with concern in her eyes.
"Was it another dream about Voldemort?" she asked.
"No," Harry said. "It was…well, it was a nice dream. I just couldn't sleep after it. Too many thoughts flying around in my head."
Harry looked down at his feet so he wouldn't have to look in her eyes and he saw the pieces of the shattered lamp scattered on the floor.
"Here, let me fix that. Reparo." Harry said pointing his wand at the pieces and he and Ginny watched as the lamp mended itself and once again sat solidly on the end table. Harry glanced back at Ginny and saw that she was still clutching the pillow tightly to her chest and staring at the lamp with a distant look in her eyes as if she were looking for something as far away as the stars.
"What were you doing up Gin?" Harry asked, his voice pulling her back from her dreamy state.
"I…I was…I couldn't sleep either. I was lying up in my bed and I just couldn't stop thinking about…a…about." Ginny blushed red. "About what a beautiful night it must be so I decided to go lay out on the lawn, under the stars."
"Sounds magical," Harry murmured, thinking about Ginny lying under the stars all curled up in her blanket or better yet all curled up against him.
Ginny was getting that dreamy look on her face again and Harry found himself wishing that it was thoughts of him that were putting it there. And Ginny was wondering what Harry would think if he knew that to her, thoughts of him were more magical than all the stars in the sky.
"What? Oh yes," said Ginny trying to stay in reality. "Although sometimes the stars just seem so distant, so…unreachable."
Ginny looked at Harry and their eyes meet.
"Yes, I know what you mean," Harry replied.
They stood there for an instant in the thick silence each lost in thoughts about the other.
Ginny broke the silence first, "Well, I suppose we should both get to bed. We do have a big Quiddich match tomorrow, right Harry?"
"Oh, yeah. Ravenclaw," agreed Harry. "Don't stress Gin you will do great I am sure." Harry placed a reassuring arm around Ginny's shoulder.
"I know I will. Worry about yourself Potter," came Ginny's bold reply.
Harry chuckled at her confidence and flippancy, "I forgot it's Ron who always needs the pep talk, not you Weasley."
Ginny smiled up at Harry. He realized that his arm was still around her shoulders and he felt his heart beat faster as she gazed up at him. Then Harry did the thing that seemed most natural to him. He leaned down slightly until his scarred forehead touched Ginny's freckled one. They each looked into each others eyes, searching for what the other was thinking. Ginny was the first to break the spell. She pulled slightly away from Harry.
"So, bed?"
"Uh…wh..what?" Harry asked flustered. Then he realized this wasn't his dream and she meant separate beds. "Yeah, sure Gin."
They both stood there another moment looking at each other. Then Ginny slowly turned and started walking towards the girls' dormitory.
"Night Harry."
"Night Ginny."
Harry started to move away as well.
You're blowing it you fool.
Harry heard the voice inside his head. To him it sounded a bit like Sirius.
You saw the way she looked at you. Don't let her leave now. Talk to her. Ask her to stay. If you don't take this chance you might not get another one. She'll think you don't care and she'll find another guy.
"Ginny?" Harry asked turning around suddenly.
"Yes, Harry?"
"Are you that tired?"
"Not really, are you Harry?"
"No," Harry said moving towards the couch by the fire. "Would you like to sit up awhile with me?"
"Sure, I'd like that. I really don't think I'd be able to get back to sleep now." She walked over and sat close to him on the couch, putting aside her blanket and pillow.
"Incendio," Harry pointed his wand at the fireplace and watched as the fire crackled to life.
"Nice," said Ginny.
They both fixed their eyes on the flames and said nothing for several minutes.
"Harry?" Ginny asked breaking the silence. "What was your dream about, if it wasn't about Lord Voldemort?"
Harry hesitated, his eyes still watching the flickering flames.
"You don't have to tell me if you don't want to."
"No Gin, it's alright. I'll tell you. You've been a good friend to me all these years. You understand more than anyone here what I've been through with Voldemort and I know you understand why I have to fight him. I know I usually try to keep people from realizing how hard it is for me to deal with everything, but there is no one I would rather trust with my feelings than you Ginny. I know I can talk to you and you won't try to tell me what to do like Hermione or look for me to be the strong one like Ron. I know you'll just listen and offer me comfort. I know you'll understand and let me figure things out my own way. And when I do I know you'll be right there with me. That means a lot to me Gin, and I'll never forget it. I know I can tell you about my fears and secrets…" Harry trailed off.
"Oh Harry, I'm glad you feel like you can talk to me. Sometimes I feel like all my experiences with Tom Riddle were a blessing just so I would be able to be there for you when you were struggling with Voldemort. I'm so glad that you feel you can come to me."
Ginny slipped her hand inside Harry's.
"Sometimes I wish you would come to me more than you do Harry. I know you keep so much inside and it worries me that you won't be able to contain it all. We all need someone to share our burdens with and I…well, I just always hoped that I could be that person for you. You saved my life once Harry and I want to save yours everyday."
Thoughts raced through Harry's mind.
What is this? Is she saying what I think she's saying or is she just concerned? She's holding your hand idiot, do something. Tell her.
"Ginny," Harry whispered. "My dream…it, it was about you. I've been having a lot of dreams about you."
Harry looked down at his bare feet.
"You have? Are they that bad that you can't sleep?" Ginny asked looking disappointed.
"No Gin, that's not it. I can't sleep because…well, because of the way I feel about you. I dream about you all the time and when I'm awake I can't stop thinking about you. Ginny I love you. I have for some time now. I just didn't know how to tell you and you were always with another guy. But I don't want to keep it a secret anymore. I hate having secrets from you."
Ginny looked at him not saying anything. Harry saw her silence as her trying to find something to say that wouldn't hurt his feelings.
"I know you've probably given up on my Ginny. I know I took too long to realize what a wonderful person I've had right here in front of me all these years. And I just thought that maybe since you and Dean…I'm sorry. I'll go upstairs now and I won't bother you with this again. I hope you still want to be my friend even after I've been so foolish."
Harry got up to leave but Ginny held on firmly to his hand. This time it was her mind that was racing.
Did he just say that he loves me? I can't believe this is happening. Maybe I fell asleep out under the stars and I'm going to wake up cold and alone in a few minutes. But no, Harry is real. I feel his warmth next to me. And his feelings are real. I know him too well to not believe what I see in his eyes.
"Harry," Ginny said softly pulling him back down on the sofa, never releasing his hand. "I never gave up on you."
"You…you didn't? You mean?" Harry looked at Ginny anxiously.
"I love you Harry James Potter. I've loved you since the moment I saw you and my love has only grown over the years. And I can promise you that I will always, always love you."
"Maybe I'm still dreaming," Harry mused.
"Who says dreams can't become reality?"
"Then this is the first time in a long while that I feel like I can face reality."
"We can face it together Harry."
"Together. I like the sound of that Gin."
Then, as he had done so often in his dreams, Harry bent down and kissed Ginny softly on the lips. His lips melted against hers and the two lovers came together in a kiss that had been years in the making.
When their kiss finally broke they both knew that this dreamland was very much their new reality. Ginny rested her head on Harry's chest as he stroked her hair and told her everything that had been going through his head the past few weeks. He shared his fears, his worries, his happiness, and his dreams with Ginny. They sat and talked for hours sorting through the past, rejoicing in the present, and even thinking into the future.
When it was obvious that neither of them could conceal their yawns Harry looked up at the clock above the mantle.
"My goodness Gin," Harry said. "Its almost four o'clock in the morning."
"Oh my, it is," replied Ginny.
Harry caught sight of Ginny's blanket and pillow piled beside her on the couch.
"I bet the stars are still up Gin. Why don't we go keep them company?"
Ginny smiled softly, "That sounds like a wonderful idea Harry." She gathered up her pillow and blanket.
"Do you need to run up and get yours?" she asked.
"Nah," Harry grinned. "I figured I'd just share yours. I wouldn't want to wake up that brother of yours again, You know how cranky he gets."
"Well, we wouldn't want that now would we?"
"Let's go," Harry said taking her hand.
They walked over to the portrait hole and Harry nudged the Fat Lady gently with his wand.
"Hmmm, y…yes?" The Fat Lady moaned.
"Vermillion," the two said in unison.
"Oh, for Merlin's sake. Why don't you children ever sleep?" The Fat Lady said grudgingly as the portrait hole swung open.
Ginny and Harry climbed through and walked outside to the lawn. Harry spread Ginny's blanket out under Gryffindor tower and Ginny lay snuggled in Harry's arms. They gazed up at the stars and whispered more words of love to each other as they began to drift off to sleep.
"I hope I dream of you," said Harry.
"And I hope I dream of you," added Ginny.
"We'll be together when we wake up."
"We'll be together forever."
Laying there in each others arms under the starry sky, in that state between consciousness and dreaming, Harry James Potter and Genevra Molly Weasley knew that this was the way it always should be.
