Hello,
I'm posting a first chapter of a new story. Obviously, the original story is not mine, I'm just playing with the characters and possible courses of action. It takes place in November 2011 so around six months after they first met. It didn't follow the canon too much. There are a few differences in that world. It starts in the middle of the action. We can see them trying to define what their relationship really is and if it's satisfying for them. I had fun writing it and hopefully you're going to enjoy it. Anastasia has a bit different background and a few minor changes. This story won't be too long, so I won't leave you hanging for long time. It'll be rather slow, but it's on purpose.

Anyway, have a nice time reading and, as always, all the feedback totally appreciated.

Cheers
~M

Chapter 1

APOV

I've spent the last few months in the maze. I've recently graduated from University and moved to Seattle. I started working as an interpreter in French and I felt lucky that I found the job I've always wanted. The beginning wasn't so simple. I lived with my best friend Kate, and our friendship had its ups and downs. I felt odd in my own company and I felt like somebody was watching me. But the weirdest of all was my relationship with Christian Grey that has been my biggest secret from everyone. I tried adjusting to my friends lives. I've tried to keep in touch with my sister, but I felt like I was failing everyone around me. I didn't have a land to stand on. I was lost and I felt like I was on my own. It was hard, but I couldn't neglect the last friends I had left. I felt guilty and weak and only few people could remind me about the beauty of simple things in life. Kate was one of those people.

"You know you should socialise a bit more?" Kate was nagging me for a hundredth time this month. Truth be told, I didn't have much time for socialising. My schedule was almost always full. I looked at Kate and I saw she was worried about me. I didn't want her to worry there was no reason to. I could do that for her today. I had some time and we could use some time as just roomies.

"It's just not my style, Katie. You know I don't like pubs or bars." I felt like I hurt her a bit. She also should've known better than to constantly ask me to go out with them. Clubbing wasn't my thing. I always felt endangered when I was in crowded spaces. Besides, he didn't approve it.

"You don't have to drink any alcohol."

"I'm not going to. I'm your driver, remember?" I waved with my keys and she quickly palmed herself.

"Congratulations. I love how much you tend to forget about things." I jeered at her. There was no way I was going to miss the opportunity to spend time with her, but I wished she wanted to spend some time my way. My introversion was boring for the majority of people and I was really trying to fit in, to some extent at least… However, it might've been a paranoia, but I had a feeling that I was being watched.

"Come on, let's have some fun together. José and Claire are coming, and Ethan will be there as well/". I smiled at the thought of Ethan. It was rare that he was staying in the city. He's worked as a psychologist for almost two years now and I knew it was very important for him. His parents hoped he would take over the family business, but it turned out that Kate was more willing to do that, therefore she graduated journalism. "I even asked Alex if she could come." I heard Kate add quickly. My eyes shot to hers. I haven't seen her for more than a month and I felt extremely guilty about that.

"I'll do my best, okay?" She noticed I gave in and stopped annoying me for about half an hour.

I liked my friends, but I felt like I didn't totally belong with them. They were so positive, full of joy and energy and I couldn't find the reason why I couldn't get on with them for the longer period of time. I worked hard over shyness and it's safe to say that I've overcome it to a great extent. I'm a strong person and I'm competent in my job and I know what I'm doing. I was telling this to myself for years and I knew that I wasn't that frightened student who was sent last-minute to do an interview with one of the richest people in the States. I would deal with that better now. I knew it. He taught me a lot of things.

I quickly changed into comfortable hoody and jeans and remembered to brush my hair into a ponytail.

"I'll be ready in five!" I glanced at my watch. There was no fucking way she'd be able to get herself ready in such a short notice.

The pub was near our apartment. It was only a thirty-minute ride, so I knew that driving at night wouldn't be much of a problem. The pub was relatively quiet because it was around seven. It was too early for most of the people. It was going to get louder in an hour or so.

"Can't believe you made it today. Great to see you" I gave him a short hug and exchanged a few kind words.

"Same here, look after Kate, she's in the mood today." I gave him meaningful look. He knew his sister very well and he was well aware that there were moments when she only wanted to get drunk.

I was joking that because I wasn't drinking I was making sure they had anything to drink. I was collecting their orders because I knew I would be able to help them and that I wouldn't have to listen to their drunken chat. Alex was also there but I wasn't talking much to her. I knew she didn't blame me for not calling, her life was always busy. It was just… it felt wrong of me that I hid things from her. She was my family and she had right to know what was going on in my life.

"I'm glad Kate called me. She finally gave me an excuse to leave my apartment." She referred to her job. She was an IT specialist and she was working from home from time to time.

"Yeah, me too. Look, I'm sorry I didn't call you, I was just busy with stuff…" I felt horrible while lying to her. I knew I had no other choice.

I took another round of shots for my friends and returned to our table. I knew that Kate and Ethan had no idea what was going on in my head. I quickly checked if there were no messages waiting for me from Mr. Grey. Luckily, none.

He was the reason I became quieter lately. I couldn't break the rules. I had to be more careful and vigilant in my everyday life. I let him know I was going out with my friends. It was my Friday evening off. That meant I was going to sleep at Grey's on Monday to make up for today. That was how we set it. I read the message. Have fun and be careful Ms. Steele.

It was nice of him. At first, I didn't think it could work between the two of us, but we've found our way, or I thought so. He was good to me and he really cared. We were trying things he and I enjoyed for the proper balance in our relationship. I was looking at José's fiancée and I couldn't stop smiling at their sight.

"Have you set the date?" I asked to start a conversation. I was expecting some excitement and optimism, but I was taken differently.

"We're not in a hurry. Time will tell." Claire huffed at me and I simply brushed it off. I had more important things on my mind than Claire's period and mood swings.

After each shot Kate was becoming more and more straightforward and open. She wanted to dance, and she suggested changing the place.

"Kate, you're barely in condition to walk. If you like you can stay here, but I think we should call it a night soon." She pouted, and I knew that an argument was about to arise.

"Don't you dare, Steele! It's too early to head home. Bring me another shot!" Claire and Ethan immediately agreed. Kate was going to regret that in the morning but that wasn't my position to parent her. She was an adult woman who could care of herself, as she was constantly trying to prove to everyone.

"Are you sure? I'll bring some water as well and you're going to drink that first." She agreed without complaints. It took me a few minutes because there were many people at that time and moving around wasn't the most comfortable thing to do. I was almost at the table when I lost my balance and the water spilled all over the man in front of me. What was odd, the bottle for the group was intact. I felt so ashamed and even more when I saw it was Grey. I didn't show I knew him, I knew he wouldn't be pleased with that, but I understood why he was there. He was keeping an eye on me and I wasn't sure if that was a good thing. I was with friends all the time, I didn't have a single shot. I was only a company to them. Responsible and calm as always. I knew he liked that about me, one lesson was enough for excessive drinking. I wasn't going to repeat that ever again. It was the first time he came to a pub after me. It felt nice in some way, but odd in another. He provoked that situation. I acted the best I could.

"I'm so sorry. I'll get this clean right now." I moved to a counter and asked for a cloth or something and another water. He led me out of their side and made me look at him. Then, he kissed me and let me go.

"Why are you here, Mr. Grey?" I knew he wouldn't lie to me. We both wanted to be told the truth and only the truth.

"I wanted to see you. I missed you, Anastasia." He placed another kiss on my lips. I looked around and we were from people. Nobody cared about us. We looked just like many other people casually talking to one another. The thing was that we weren't like others. There were days I was thinking if we were a couple at all. We had fun from time to time, but for the majority of our time together I was his submissive, not his girlfriend. I wasn't sure where I was standing. He agreed to give me 'more' and I saw that he was really trying, despite being his controlling self.

"I missed you too, but that was my day off as we set this month." I said quietly. He simply agreed.

"I thought I'd find you drunk after you spilled that water over me, but I didn't sense any alcohol on you."

"Maybe because I didn't drink any. I'm driving tonight. I know you're checking me, sir." He brushed my hair and I saw he was examining me. He didn't like the way I spoke to him, but I felt like he didn't trust me, but it passed before I held onto that.

"I was thinking. Would you come tonight to sleep with me after you take everybody home?" I nodded. I was going to see him at nine but coming earlier was a nice perspective.

"Sure, Sir, I'm really sorry about the shirt. Seriously, did you only come here because you missed me?"

"Yes, and I had some fun time with my brother who's right now talking to your BFF." He glanced over my shoulder and I turned to look at him. He didn't look like Christian at all and I could see he was having a good time talking with Kate. Knowing Kate, I'll have one passenger less on the way back.

"Cool. I should go back to my people. See you later, and sorry again." As I expected, nobody noticed I was gone for a few seconds and Kate was full of new energy. As fucking always. José has already left, and I wanted to head out as well.

"Alex, are you staying with us tonight?" I asked my sister when she came back from the restroom.

"I don't think so, Ana. I have a lot of work to do and I'm on my own. You can drop by someday you know. I've missed you." I knew she was genuinely worried. Whenever she was trying to reach me, I was brushing her off and when I should call her, I was pushing that aside on my priority list. She was very important to me, but it didn't feel right to bother her with my presence. I was always the worse sister. She was the one smart, with good grades and bright future ahead. I wasn't jealous, I was only lost. I didn't think I should be a part of her life.

"I'll surely come. Thanks a lot for coming, sis." She hugged me goodbye and left leaving me with Ethan and Kate who wasn't paying much attention to either of us.

"I asked if she wanted to go home and she said she's staying with the guy she met. I'll order a cab when we'd be leaving. You're exhausted so just take the car and go home. Is that okay with you Ana?" I nodded. I left the pub and I quickly returned home. I quickly washed off my basic make-up and headed to Escala. I entered the foyer and found Mr. Grey waiting for me. I wasn't expecting him to wait at that time.

"How was your evening?"

"Tiring very much, and yours?" Christian faked a smile and joked.

"The best I had in years. Seriously, it was just like all the others with Elliot. Each time he tells me to get laid and each time he's too busy talking to some girl that talk to his brother." I felt a mocking tone in his voice. That was clear, he was close with him and he was important to him.

"I have the same thing with Kate. This time she even called my sister to come. That was very thoughtful of her."

"Yes, it was. You miss her. Now shower and bed. My bed this time, pet." I smiled and waited for him to follow me. As always, I wasn't in control of what was going on with my body. He was nice to me and I knew he felt relieved he could trust me about going to places like these. Thanks to that I was building up his trust in me and I was grateful he seemed to enjoy our arrangement. There were moments I had no doubt I was his sub, but there were also moments when I was speaking up, when we were arguing on petty things as cooking, so it seemed balanced to me. I felt safe when I was around Mr. Grey.

I took a quick shower and washed my hair, so it took longer than I expected. Mr. Grey was waiting for me and I knew it was late, so he just wanted to get some sleep. I texted Kate to remind her about being careful.

"That was a great day. Do you have anything planned for tomorrow?" I asked him casually. Whenever he was allowing me to sleep with him that meant just being us, a regular people who were friends and enjoyed spending time in one's company, or at least I thought so.

"You'll see little one. For now, just rest." I took his hand in mine and quickly drifted away.

As always, he woke up before me. I quickly took care of my morning routine and after fifteen minutes I realised I overslept. It was almost ten in the morning and I didn't wake up in time. I had to make breakfast for us and to check up on my friend. Based on her texts, Kate was fine and happy. I needed nothing else. I only hoped I wouldn't see fluffy pink pyjamas anytime soon.

I didn't find Christian in the kitchen. That meant he was either in his study, or he went running. It was the latter. After a few minutes I saw him entering home and I saw he had a good time in the morning.

"I'm sorry I didn't get up earlier. I didn't set the alarm, sir."

"Don't worry, I've just come home after the run. I woke up about an hour before you. Could you make me something to eat?" I quickly prepared a sub for him like he always liked and I knew he was satisfied by my doing. I ate on my own. He joined me when he finished and we were sitting in the kitchen together and we laughed like the good old friends.

Unfortunately, nothing can be too good. We noticed Taylor entering the room and announcing to us.

"Ms. Lincoln is on her way up." I wasn't happy to hear that. We were trying to make the weekends ours, or maybe rather Christian was trying to make them his. Not that I minded. There was something about that woman that made me feel uncomfortable, but I never said it out loud. She was a dominant as well and I felt it in her presence. I stood up to take our plates and put them in a sink. She was in her fifties, but she was taking good care of herself. She was wearing plain black suit and she had some rings on her fingers. I looked like a total opposite of her.

She came to greet us, and she quickly took a place where I was sat. I wanted to say something, but I didn't want to sound rude to her, or rather I didn't want to disappoint Christian. He wanted me to always be polite and I was trying to respect that wish.

"What a surprise, Elena. You didn't inform me you were going to come over." Christian said in a friendly tone although I could see he was irritated. He didn't like his plans disrupted whatever he had in mind. I was up to anything just to be around him.

"I think that the circumstances are too important to discuss it on the phone." I knew he was intrigued.

"Would you like anything to drink?" He looked at me and I knew I had to serve it.

"Black coffee, please." I hurried to make it and I was wondering what was so important that she came without an invitation. She must've known he was with someone at that time and she wouldn't be shocked in any way. She knew about Christian's lifestyle and she was his friend. She didn't mind me running around. It was okay for her and she was always reminding me that I was only a sub. Christian didn't answer to that but he was reassuring me that I was more than that to him. I knew he cared for me. I felt it. We've been together for over six months. Christian was thinking about extending our contract indefinitely. He asked me about it one day after a scene and I didn't give him a straight answer. I still had some time to give him an answer.

"Here you are, Mrs. Lincoln" and I stepped aside. I wanted to leave but I heard Christian's voice behind me.

"I don't recall giving you permission to leave, Ms. Steele." I quickly composed myself and stood behind Christian. He didn't give me any instruction, so I was just waiting.

"I think you're being too soft on her. You've had her for too long to have situations like these. Maybe you should remind her about her place." I hated when she was doing that. I felt like an intruder then, but I felt like I needed to be out of there.

"May I speak freely?" Grey nodded. "I thought it would be a private meeting and I didn't mean to interrupt it. If it was something you disapproved, sir, then I'm sorry for that." I waited for the answer, but nothing came. Christian didn't have any response and I knew it was because he was actually thinking about letting me stay. These moments were hard for us because that was when he was lost about who I was to him.

"It's okay Anastasia. You're right, I overreacted. I'll come to you when we're finished. I moved out of her sight and went upstairs. I wanted to go straight to my room, but something stopped me. I didn't mean to eavesdrop on them, it just happened.

"I don't like her." I heard Mrs. Lincoln's voice. Not that I was surprised. The feeling was very much mutual. She seemed like a predator for me and I wanted to hide somewhere whenever possible.

"You know you don't have to. Ms. Steele is one of my best choices, Elena. You could be nicer to her, you know."

"I don't think she's right for you… You need someone more compliant. I can see she's too straightforward I could say, or rather cheeky. I think I taught you better than that… For crying out loud, she's just a sub." I rolled my eyes, but I didn't like that Grey didn't have any answer to that. I knew that in her opinion I shouldn't be able to speak at all, and live only to serve, but I wasn't like that and Grey knew about it. I didn't hear his answer and I didn't want to risk coming closer.

"Why did you come here, Elena?"

"I came to you with the reports and some numbers don't add up." I moved away from them and left them on their own. It was their business not mine. I was thinking about what she said, and I felt like everything I believed in was a lie. I was thinking that Grey was also my friend. I thought he enjoyed spending time with me, and yet I was just a sub for him.

I went to my room and went through the books on the shelf. The majority of them were my favourites. He took them from his library to make me feel more comfortable whenever I wanted to read. I skimmed through the covers and found a small dark blue notebook. There was nothing written on it except for roman "I" on it written in navy ink. I haven't seen that before. It was small, so it was easy to miss. I opened it and understood it was a journal of sorts. It was dated back to 2009 and it was written in a neat delicate handwriting. I wasn't sure if I should read it. I knew it wasn't Grey's handwriting. It was written by a woman. Probably one of his subs. But why would he leave it in here? I put it back and lay on the bed waiting for him to come. I checked my texts and Kate confirmed she was safe and sound and the night was cool. I was wondering what I was going to do.

I heard a knock and jumped on the bed. He came in and sat beside me. I could see when he was asking me as a friend and when he was checking up on me as a Dom. He knew I didn't like her visits. I felt like she wanted to hurt me and on more than one occasion he confirmed that my feelings were correct.

"Is something bothering you Ms. Steele?"

"I'm still a bit tired about yesterday and I'm somewhat confused. I was sure you didn't want me there, sir."

"You were right. I was irritated that she came, and I made you feel uncomfortable. What I don't understand was why you didn't do as you were told?" I gulped. It was obvious he'd know.

"I don't know. It probably doesn't matter anyway." I was looking down the entire time and I was feeling worse with every second. I turned so he could see my back, but he didn't comment on my behaviour. I felt his hand on my back and I wasn't sure what he was going to do. I closed my eyes and focused on every breath. Even if he was going to punish me, I knew it wasn't going to be serious. I've handled worse. Like for example when I was walking home past midnight, on my own and didn't call anyone to take me home. That one was pretty bad one.

"Okay, we're leaving in ten minutes, so get dressed. We're going out" With that he was gone. I quickly put on my sweater and jeans. He didn't mention anything specific so I figured that would be fine. I found him waiting in the foyer and I knew he wasn't entirely pleased with me, but I wasn't going to mess up today. I wanted to be okay for him.

In the car, I was silent. I didn't know what to say exactly. I wanted to apologise for eavesdropping, but I knew that wouldn't do much. I wanted to know what was going on his head. We stopped roughly ten miles form the city. I liked that we escaped from all the buzz. I was waiting for whatever was going to come.

"Thank you for coming today earlier. Yet, if I'd known, I would've told you to come later." He turned to me and took the hair off my cheek. I wasn't looking at him. I was buried in my own thoughts.

"Am I enough for you, Mr. Grey?" I blurted out unable to stop myself. I felt his eyes on me and he took his time to speak.

"You're more than enough." He left the car and opened the door on my side. I joined him, and we went for a walk. We weren't in a hurry but there were moments when it was hard for me to keep up. We were walking for several miles. It was late when we were returning to Escala. I didn't understand that field trip. It was odd and I didn't know what to think about it. I was genuinely lost and there were moments when I totally couldn't read him.

Okay, let me know if you enjoyed it, and see you guys next time.
~M :)