"Guys, guys!" Panting like the fat-ass he still was, Cartman raced up to the bus stop, one hand stretched out for the other guys. If they hadn't witnessed it themselves on several past occasions, none of them would have believed that he could have gotten any fatter than his eight-year old counterpart. "You will never guess what I just saw! Come on you guys, guess!" There was silence, and Kyle simply rolled his eyes. "I said guess, God-dammit!"
Looking between each other, it was Stan who replied. Honestly, after everything that the town had been through, what was the point of getting excited about anything? "What?"
"There's a new family in town!"
Again, what was the point of caring? "So what dude?"
"Yeah, we've had people move in and out of town before, so who cares?" Kyle wasn't quite as pessimistic as Stan, but seriously, what was the big deal?
Only somewhat abashed by the lack of interest in this news, Cartman pressed on. "Because there's a girl with them, and I saw her changing in front of her window!" He went on, trying to sound all important, "The window across from my room!"
Well that certainly got their attention. Kenny pounced right to the most important question: "Did you see her tits?!"
"Did I see her tits?" Eric burst into a wide grin, eager to share the details. "Of course I saw her tits! They were magical, all glistening in the light; it was like Jesus, Jesus being born from God's vagina."
"God didn't give birth to Jesus, dumb-ass. Mary did." It wasn't any of the other three that had corrected him, but a forth (or seventh, if you counted Cartman and his asses) guy. "What are you talking about?"
Having missed the first half of the conversation, the new boy had only just joined them at the bus stop, one hand in his pocket as he put away his earbuds. They were no stranger to the cold, so it wasn't anything out of the ordinary, seeing his puffed-out army coat or the black hoodie scrunched underneath it. His over-sized beanie covered his entire head, so it was impossible to tell what color hair he had. He didn't look completely lame, and there was an obvious air of no shit-giving about him, so they figured they wouldn't shun him on the spot. Maybe by the time the bus got there, but not just yet.
"Fat-ass over here got new neighbors, and he said that he saw one of them naked." Kyle pointed over at Eric, who took as much offense as usual to the crack about his weight.
"Hey! I'm not fat, I'm just big-boned!" Becuase they never heard that one before.
The boy in the army coat looked slightly alarmed at that claim, "What?"
Looking again at the direction the boy had come from, Stan figured that he must be Cartman's new neighbor, or one of them. "Dude, he must have seen your sister."
The boy shook his head, "I don't have a sister."
They rounded in on Cartman, given his history of not telling the truth, "You liar!"
"Hey, I'm not lying!" He pointed at the boy, "I saw your sister's tits!"
The boys fell silent, waiting to see how the new kid would react, and he didn't disappoint, whatever his name was. Taking advantage of Cartman's general fatness and lack of expecting retaliation, the new kid decked Cartman straight in the face, slugging him right in the nose. There was a crack and some whimpering, but Eric remained in place, large tears welling up in the corner of his piggy little eyes. His nose was bleeding pretty bad. The new guy was a little worse for wear, his hand shaking and knuckles cracking sickly.
At that moment, the bus pulled up.
"Wow, dude, that was so cool!" Pleased to see anyone stand up to Cartman, the other guys all led the new kid to the back of the bus where they sat, leaving Eric to follow behind them, darkly muttering a promise of revenge. They probably should have warned the new guy to take his incessant rambling seriously, but they were too caught up in the moment...
[South Park]
Standing in the doorway as he walked in to class late (held up by having to turn his paperwork in to the office and have a private word with the principal, only to be forced to see the nurse for his hand), the new kid cringed back as all eyes fell on him. Even the teacher was staring from his place at the blackboard. Cartman, sitting at the back of the class with Stan, Kyle and Kenny (all of whom had introduced themselves back on the bus), glared at him. The other three boys showed varying levels of interest.
"Oh, so you must be the new kid, Hunter Bloodworth. Ok, well Mr. Hunter, you best sit down. As you can see, the school board are a bunch of stingy bastards, so there isn't enough seating now that you're here." Mr. Garrison (whom had become the boy's homeroom teacher last month after yet another break down with the sixth graders) pointed at the desk Kenny was sitting at. "Kenny, let Mr. Hunter take your seat."
"Why the fuck do I have to move?!" Came his scandalized cry.
Mr. Garrison frowned, "Because you're poor Kenny."
Cartman laughed, but he was pretty much the only one.
Hunter looked over at Kenny, feeling bad that his arrival was such an inconvenience for someone that had been here during the whole school year. "I don't mind sitting on the floor."
"Well that's mighty nice of you Hunter, but Kenny's poor, so he's less important." Mr. Garrison sounded as if this was his final answer.
Shrugging apologetically at Kenny, the boys swapped places, but not without Hunter getting the last word. "Whatever."
"Oh, great, another smart-ass teenager!" Mr. Garrison snapped as he continued on with the lesson (the blatant favoritism of actors that can't really act).
Huddling up in the corner furthest from the heater, Hunter looked down at Kenny, "Is he always that way?"
Muffled as ever, he answered Hunter's question. His reply made Hunter laugh, a sound which did not go unnoticed by Mr. Garrison. "Yes, Mr. Bloodworth? You seem to have an alternate opinion?"
He grinned over at Kenny, "Not at all, Mr. Garrison. Kenny here was just filling me in on all your marvelous opinions."
Trying to detect of this was true or not, Mr. Garrison figured that it would just save time to punish them both. After all, this lesson was already planned to take up an entire week, and that was only by abridging it. "Hunter, Kenny, I want you two to stay after school for detention!"
"Sweet, now I actually have plans. You're too kind sir." It was Kenny's turn to snigger at Hunter's joke.
Mr. Garrison wasn't finding this nearly as funny as they were. "For the rest of the week!" Oh, good lord, what had he done?! Stuck with those two little hooligans for an entire week!
The boys were saved further punishment by the sounds of class ending. Sweet.
"Dude, that was so cool how you stood up to Mr. Garrison like that!" Kyle whistled in appreciation as they filed out of the classroom.
Shrugging, Hunter just followed them without paying too much attention to where they were going. "What, don't tell me you guys actually take that guy seriously?"
"Mr. Garrison?" Stan could have snorted at the very idea. "Fuck dude, we've never taken that ass-crammer seriously!"
"Yeah," Kenny affirmed what they were saying.
Fuck, Hunter hadn't thought about that. He was too busy showing off for his new friends to bother thinking about what kind of a teacher Mr. Garrison was, or even what the consequences could be. He might have put on a face of uncaring distance, but really, he had to make an example for his little brother, and getting detention on his first day of school was not the way to do that...
"Man, I fucking hate gym class!" Cartman - ignoring Hunter - bitched as they entered the locker room.
Realizing where they were for the first time - a lot of the other guys already in the process of changing into their gym clothes - Hunter looked at them in panic. "I shoul-"
"Hey, new kid!" The coach came over to them at that moment, pointing a rather fat and dirty finger at the boy he was addressing, "Your uniform hasn't come in yet, so you have to sit this one out-"
"Lucky bastard!" Cartman muttered under his breath.
"-So I want you to just watch the other boys and how they play. I know your records say that you were pretty good at sports, so maybe you can give them pointers. Fatso here could use it."
Hunter tried to argue with the coach, but he silenced the boy by blowing on his silver whistle, causing a number of kids nearby to jump. Giving up on trying to talk to the coach, he just kind of fell back to the shadows as he put his stuff in his gym locker.
Taking the opportunity of his absence, Cartman whispered to the others as they all stripped down and changed, "So what do you think of that new kid?"
"I like him."
"Yeah, he's not bad."
"He's cool."
Not really hearing what they had said, Cartman went on as if they were on his side, "I know, he sucks ass. So what are he going to do about him?"
"We," Kyle pointed at the three of them, "Aren't doing shit. We actually like Hunter, fat-ass."
Shell-shocked by this, Cartman looked almost genuinely hurt to hear that. Almost. But they knew him better than that...
My first South Park fic. Hopefully you guys like it!
I do not own South Park, that's all on Matt and Trey, but I do own Hunter!
[Edit: 9/13/14 - Fixed a sentence and added a few words to complete a few more sentences. Yes, more is coming.]