Forsaken
There is a girl sitting in a room. It is one of those clinical little holes in the wall found in
low slung, one story administrative office complexes occupied by down at the heels, threadbare social service agencies. The walls are a flat institutional cream, decorated with happy little children's drawings dominated by a splashy poster with broadly smiling adults and children. It states grandly "Foster Families Make Good Citizens". The girl would spit at the poster, but she wouldn't waste the saliva.
She's really quite pretty. Tall for her age which is about twelve. She has red hair, lots of it, she has it piled and pinned atop her head with a long braid hanging off to the left. She's managed to get her ears pierced and wears small green stud earrings. She has cadged makeup off the staff and looks eerily precocious with her eye-lined cat's blue eyes, deep red lips, and lavender eye shadow. Her good looks are spoiled somewhat by a sullen introspective glare not improved by the fact that she's been waiting in this boring hellhole for almost half and hour.
The door opens and in steps a pleasant faced middle aged man in a Fair Isle sweater with wavy brown hair, and mild, kind brown eyes. "Hullo Jessie," he says tentatively.
Her expression has changed, her eyes look pleading, her cheeks colour, her lips part. "Uh, Hi....Dad," she says with even greater tentativeness.
Look. Mom, I mean Joy, couldn't come, she's looking after your sis...um, Cassie. And she didn't, I mean couldn't, bring herself to see you," he sadly notes.
Did you tell her I still wanna be a pokémon nurse, no matter what?"
Look, how could I talk about that with her after all the stuff that's happened?"
She looks quickly at the floor, "I suppose you couldn't," she murmurs contritely.
You know Jessica we still...like you, but you've hurt us a lot. I know you've been kicked around a lot in the foster care system, but I really thought we could make it work. You're smart, and you've got spirit, but you misuse those gifts, and we just can't take your lying, screaming its, lashing out, and stealing anymore. We've got a daughter of our own, and after what you did to her...well that's it, we can't handle you any more. I'm sorry. I'm really, really so sorry."
She looks at him briefly, then looks at the wall, Did you get, I mean did you give Cass the get-well-card I made?"
Yes, and she sort of liked it at first, then she Threw it away. She won't even speak your name anymore," he observes, "You know, they be took out the stitches today. There'll be a scar, but it could be worse I suppose. That's what Joy and I worry about," he pauses, "Worse things..."
I really didn't mean it!" she cries her voice breaking, "I won't ever do anything like it again! I promise!"
You're a violent, angry girl Jess. I don't think you can keep such a promise, even though you mean to do so."
"You don't care about me! Nobody ever has!" she insists.
"Not true Jessie. I only wish I could have been there to protect you from all those foster fathers who hurt you until you lost all control of that temper of yours, but that's not how it was."
"Oh Dad...Mr. Yamato, couldn't you take me back? Yours was the best home I've ever been in! I need you!" she's pleading, begging.
No, I'm sorry. Joy and I are decided, besides Cassie would make your life hell just to provoke another outburst. Why did you two have to fight over that boy anyway?"
She goes silent and turns to the wall. "Don't I have a right to know why you attacked my daughter so viciously?"
No answer. "This is exactly why we can't keep you on Jessica."
He stands up, runs his fingers exasperatedly through his hair and says, "I came here because I really wanted to say goodbye, and to wish you luck. I'm sorry, I really am. I wanted so much to get you to womanhood, because Joy and I were sure when we first laid eyes on you that you were going to be something special. Sadly, you've proven especially damaged and damaging. I hope things turn around for you some day, I wish we could have helped you more. Take care."
With that he turns away from the stone faced girl, opens the door and leaves, closing it with a soft but terrifyingly final click. Something clicks in Jessie's head too. She closes her eyes, takes a deep breath, and waits for the social worker to return.
She sheds no tears until she has laid her head on the pillow to go to sleep.