AN: Wow, it's been a while since I've updated anything. Well, what can I
say? I was busy with stuff. Girl Scouts, school, RPG club, exchange
students..For anyone reading this who I email, I'll be getting to those
soon; I have 80 some to get through. -.-;; After reading shadow2k's
Sparkling Harmony, I just felt the need to start writing, and here it is, a
one shot Daisuke central Takari.
The HTML stuff ain't working. Sorry bout that.
Dedication: shadow2k and Yan Yan Aod. Congrats you two, I wish you the best of luck. *smiles*
And Sypherr too, you three were my inspiration for this. Daisuki, Syph!
~*~
Daisuke nodded dumbly, the news slowly reaching his brain. Takeru.Hikari.together.Somewhere it stopped, and he smiled, forlorn hope evident in his face.
"You're..you're joking, right?" he stepped back, still smiling. "It's April Fools Day early, right? Hehehehehe..you got me."
"Dai." Hikari shook her head, her crimson eyes downcast. "We're not joking. Takeru and I are going steady."
Her hand found Takeru's, slipping inside. He squeezed it comfortingly, his eyes giving her the courage to continue. She smiled up at her oldest friend, nodding slightly to show she understood.
Daisuke gulped, his hand reaching up to scratch the back of his head as he watched the fluff-full scene before him. "Oh.ehehehe.."
His mind raced for an excuse to leave, to find a way home and cry into his pillow. Hikari, the first girl he'd ever loved..loved someone else. He thought he was over her, thought his heart was purely for another. A tear threatened to spill from his eye as he forced himself to keep the smile up. He still loved her.
The smile slowly faded as Daisuke lowered his hand, slowly reaching under his wristband to trace the veins along the wrist, continuing to look at the couple in front of him. The fingers paused, tracing along a particularly large vein as the smile working its way onto his face again. The blood pumped slowly under his hand, bringing thoughts to his head that he had buried a year ago.
"I'm sorry, but I really got to get going," Daisuke said, falsely enthusiastic. His hand flew from his wrist as he waved, turning around to walk off. Glancing over his shoulder, the teenager smiled sadly. "Maybe I'll see you two later. Congrats, I guess." His eyes faced forward once again as he continued on his way home, his heart pounding within his chest.
~*~
The boy smiled sadly at the computer screen. Obsessed could not even begin to describe the way Daisuke felt about it. He'd been getting time more frequently, even met someone who had almost all the same interests as he did. They talked occasionally over EverQuest, but it was mainly on the message board that they had met. He was trying to connect with all the old friends he could, managing to get around to meeting up with Takeru and Hikari.
He paused, his hands poised above the keyboard. Hikari..even now, memories of the love he held for her plagued his mind. Even now, a hand slowly inched down to his wrist, running along the bump of a vein. Even now, the other hand slowly reached for a pair of scissors sitting in his drawer. He blinked at himself, his eyes widening. His hands raised themselves to his face, his eyes slowly tracing the palms of his hands.
"What is wrong with me?" he whispered, his eyes wide with fear. He stood, crossing his arms to hide the underarm from himself. He started pacing around, shaking from the shock. "Not again not again not again.." He cursed to himself, shaking harder. His mind and heart started racing as he made his way over to the computer. His fingers typed as best they could as he pulled himself out of the RP.
FiredIce: ((I'm scaring myself really bad guys...I'm gonna see if I can sleep it off...night....))
In Character: I know it might happen, but I don't care! That's still no reason to even consider it an option.... *sighs* I'll see you tomorrow Hilo... *heads up to his room, his body trembling slightly*
He paused again before shutting down. He could always tell her.the girl he'd pledged his heart to, the one who'd confided in him so often. His now pasted on smile shook as he typed up a letter to her:
Fired Ice: Tarra, I'm scaring myself. Without realizing it, my fingers started tracing the veins on my wrist. I really wouldn't be so scared if the last time this happened I hadn't tried to commit suicide the next week...For the first time since....since, I can't remember, I'm afraid to die. I don't want to die anymore, I have a reason for me to live. I'm scared I'm gonna do something stupid...and I can't stop shaking. You're the only one I felt safe telling...I didn't want to tell you at first cause I figured I'd just add to your problems, and I really didn't want to do that. But I'm scared and confused and I'm having trouble thinking straight right now. I needed to tell someone...Right now I just wanna hide in my bed til I don't feel like this anymore...I, well, I'm sorry for sending this to you, but I needed to tell someone...
A small part of his desperation faded away, so small, he didn't notice it. The reply was swift.
Hilo: No, Daisuke, no!!!! Don't even think like that, my friend! I care about you too much to let you go that easily! *sighs* Don't you know that yet?
He smiled softly, for real this time, and typed up a response.
FiredIce: I know, you're the reason I don't want to die anymore. As long as I can make you smile.
Hilo: I won't ever smile again if you're not here. Daisuke, you're one of the few things keeping me sane.
FiredIce: I'm sorry Tarra.I didn't want to worry you.
Hilo: Don't you get it yet? I'll worry about you as much as you do me.
FiredIce: *hugs*.Thank you, Tarra-chan.I think I'll go to bed now. I'll see you in the morning.
Hilo: *hugs back* All right, Dai. Just remember that suicide is never the answer!
FiredIce: Thank you Tarra. Night.
Hilo: Night.
Daisuke smiled to himself for the first time since that afternoon, his feeling of depression no longer controlling his will. Something about that girl calmed him down, made him want to laugh and smile, only to see her do the same. Back to his usual goofy self...That was something he'd never give up.
And of course, the fact that they told each other everything.
Shutting down the computer, the smile remained on his face as he tried to picture what life would be like without Tarra. His mind's eye went a blood red, and he shook his head, pulling off his goggles. There'd be time for his imagination later, right now, he only wanted a peaceful sleep.
Caught in Tarra's words, he climbed into bed, his suicidal thoughts disappearing.
"Goodnight." he murmured, the chocolate brown eyes slowly falling shut into a peaceful slumber. And for once, he wasn't alone.
The HTML stuff ain't working. Sorry bout that.
Dedication: shadow2k and Yan Yan Aod. Congrats you two, I wish you the best of luck. *smiles*
And Sypherr too, you three were my inspiration for this. Daisuki, Syph!
~*~
Daisuke nodded dumbly, the news slowly reaching his brain. Takeru.Hikari.together.Somewhere it stopped, and he smiled, forlorn hope evident in his face.
"You're..you're joking, right?" he stepped back, still smiling. "It's April Fools Day early, right? Hehehehehe..you got me."
"Dai." Hikari shook her head, her crimson eyes downcast. "We're not joking. Takeru and I are going steady."
Her hand found Takeru's, slipping inside. He squeezed it comfortingly, his eyes giving her the courage to continue. She smiled up at her oldest friend, nodding slightly to show she understood.
Daisuke gulped, his hand reaching up to scratch the back of his head as he watched the fluff-full scene before him. "Oh.ehehehe.."
His mind raced for an excuse to leave, to find a way home and cry into his pillow. Hikari, the first girl he'd ever loved..loved someone else. He thought he was over her, thought his heart was purely for another. A tear threatened to spill from his eye as he forced himself to keep the smile up. He still loved her.
The smile slowly faded as Daisuke lowered his hand, slowly reaching under his wristband to trace the veins along the wrist, continuing to look at the couple in front of him. The fingers paused, tracing along a particularly large vein as the smile working its way onto his face again. The blood pumped slowly under his hand, bringing thoughts to his head that he had buried a year ago.
"I'm sorry, but I really got to get going," Daisuke said, falsely enthusiastic. His hand flew from his wrist as he waved, turning around to walk off. Glancing over his shoulder, the teenager smiled sadly. "Maybe I'll see you two later. Congrats, I guess." His eyes faced forward once again as he continued on his way home, his heart pounding within his chest.
~*~
The boy smiled sadly at the computer screen. Obsessed could not even begin to describe the way Daisuke felt about it. He'd been getting time more frequently, even met someone who had almost all the same interests as he did. They talked occasionally over EverQuest, but it was mainly on the message board that they had met. He was trying to connect with all the old friends he could, managing to get around to meeting up with Takeru and Hikari.
He paused, his hands poised above the keyboard. Hikari..even now, memories of the love he held for her plagued his mind. Even now, a hand slowly inched down to his wrist, running along the bump of a vein. Even now, the other hand slowly reached for a pair of scissors sitting in his drawer. He blinked at himself, his eyes widening. His hands raised themselves to his face, his eyes slowly tracing the palms of his hands.
"What is wrong with me?" he whispered, his eyes wide with fear. He stood, crossing his arms to hide the underarm from himself. He started pacing around, shaking from the shock. "Not again not again not again.." He cursed to himself, shaking harder. His mind and heart started racing as he made his way over to the computer. His fingers typed as best they could as he pulled himself out of the RP.
FiredIce: ((I'm scaring myself really bad guys...I'm gonna see if I can sleep it off...night....))
In Character: I know it might happen, but I don't care! That's still no reason to even consider it an option.... *sighs* I'll see you tomorrow Hilo... *heads up to his room, his body trembling slightly*
He paused again before shutting down. He could always tell her.the girl he'd pledged his heart to, the one who'd confided in him so often. His now pasted on smile shook as he typed up a letter to her:
Fired Ice: Tarra, I'm scaring myself. Without realizing it, my fingers started tracing the veins on my wrist. I really wouldn't be so scared if the last time this happened I hadn't tried to commit suicide the next week...For the first time since....since, I can't remember, I'm afraid to die. I don't want to die anymore, I have a reason for me to live. I'm scared I'm gonna do something stupid...and I can't stop shaking. You're the only one I felt safe telling...I didn't want to tell you at first cause I figured I'd just add to your problems, and I really didn't want to do that. But I'm scared and confused and I'm having trouble thinking straight right now. I needed to tell someone...Right now I just wanna hide in my bed til I don't feel like this anymore...I, well, I'm sorry for sending this to you, but I needed to tell someone...
A small part of his desperation faded away, so small, he didn't notice it. The reply was swift.
Hilo: No, Daisuke, no!!!! Don't even think like that, my friend! I care about you too much to let you go that easily! *sighs* Don't you know that yet?
He smiled softly, for real this time, and typed up a response.
FiredIce: I know, you're the reason I don't want to die anymore. As long as I can make you smile.
Hilo: I won't ever smile again if you're not here. Daisuke, you're one of the few things keeping me sane.
FiredIce: I'm sorry Tarra.I didn't want to worry you.
Hilo: Don't you get it yet? I'll worry about you as much as you do me.
FiredIce: *hugs*.Thank you, Tarra-chan.I think I'll go to bed now. I'll see you in the morning.
Hilo: *hugs back* All right, Dai. Just remember that suicide is never the answer!
FiredIce: Thank you Tarra. Night.
Hilo: Night.
Daisuke smiled to himself for the first time since that afternoon, his feeling of depression no longer controlling his will. Something about that girl calmed him down, made him want to laugh and smile, only to see her do the same. Back to his usual goofy self...That was something he'd never give up.
And of course, the fact that they told each other everything.
Shutting down the computer, the smile remained on his face as he tried to picture what life would be like without Tarra. His mind's eye went a blood red, and he shook his head, pulling off his goggles. There'd be time for his imagination later, right now, he only wanted a peaceful sleep.
Caught in Tarra's words, he climbed into bed, his suicidal thoughts disappearing.
"Goodnight." he murmured, the chocolate brown eyes slowly falling shut into a peaceful slumber. And for once, he wasn't alone.