I'm not too fond of this story, because its transitions are too rough. Sadly inspired by a real item of clothing.
"No." My wife's cold tone was firm. She had stationed herself in front of Harry's room, refusing to let me go any further.
Jeez. I go out of my way to go into a baby store and get some clothes for the baby, and my wife doesn't approve of them. I lifted my purchase up to her face. "What's wrong with it?"
"It's camouflage."
"Boys love camouflage! It makes them feel tough."
"It has lace."
"I thought you liked lace!"
"Not with camouflage."
I led Lily to Harry's crib, and held it up against him. "See?" I cooed. "It's not so bad. It's cute!"
Lily just laughed at me, picked Harry and the mini army suit up, compared the backs of both of them, and replied, "Somehow, a frilly ass doesn't really suit him."
"HA!" I cried, triumphant.
"What?" Lily asked, confused by the sudden change of subject.
"You just swore in front of the baby!"
Her free hand flew to her mouth. "I did not!"
"You did, you did!" I exclaimed, dancing around the blue baby room.
Harry chose my victory moment to begin crying. "Now look what you've done!" She scolded, then turned to comfort the baby.
"Better than swearing." I whispered in her ear.
Lily glared at me. Once the baby calmed down, she said, "Well, we can give it to Petunia for Christmas, I guess. We still need a present for her."
So that's what we did, but a week later it was returned to up with a note scribbled by Lily's darling sister.
IT DOESN'T FIT
Oh well. It didn't look too bad on Harry.