Before I fall too fast: "Rae, there's something that you should know…" Raven looked up from her book to see the green changeling. His emerald eyes were shining with embarrassment. Oh, Azarath, please don't let it be what I think it is.
Raven put her book beside her, "what is it, Beast Boy?" her voice in that perfect monotone that gave nothing away.
Beast Boy rubbed the back of his head, "alright, so here's the thing. I've kinda, really, sorta, might…you know, like you. And I know you probably don't like me back, but I just had to tell you." he closed his eyes tightly, "I'm ready for the pain." nothing happened. Odd.
Kiss me quick: He opened his eyes to see her staring at him. Just staring. No anger in her eyes no hatred. Did this mean she liked him back? There was only one way to find out, "Rae?" no answer. He was gonna do it. The time was now, but he was scared, what if she zapped him with her dark energy? Was the pain worth it? Damn right it was.
He knelt next to her on the couch, don't hurt me. Beast Boy cupped her cheek in his palm, pulling her head forward. Her purple eyes glistening with uncertainty, what if this was wrong? There were no sure things in life especially when it came to Beast Boy. Violet irises met apple ones for a brief second before they closed. He brushed his lips lightly over hers.
But make it last: Beast Boy had dreamt of kissing the purpled haired Goth for so long. He thought he was still dreaming until she began kissing him back.
Raven had never been in such an intimate embrace with anyone before. It was pleasant, nothing like she expected. She felt Beast Boy's tongue slip into her mouth and everything she had felt before seemed far away. All of her emotions felt heightened, more alive. Becoming bold, Raven let her own tongue do a spicy dance with his. He set a pace and Raven met it every step of the way. Beast Boy pushed her against the couch and sat next to her.
So I can see how badly this will hurt me: Without her permission she felt her energy flow out of her body. Dark magic encased the coffee table across from them. It hovered in air before crashing against the wall opposite of them.
Without warning, Raven pulled back from Beast Boy pushing him off the couch, "No! we can not do this."
The green hero rose off the floor, "Rae, what is it? What's wrong?"
The empath turned her eyes away, "Nothing, Beast Boy. I just…it's not safe with me. And you know that. This," she waved her hand between her and him, "can't happen."
When you say good-bye: BB nodded his head, "wow, you are completely right. What the hell was I thinking? Forgive me for telling you how I feel. Forgive me for seeing that we would be good together and that if we like each other enough danger isn't going to stop us from being together. I forgot you were single minded that way." he was angry. Angry at her for not letting them be together. Angry at himself to think that he ever had a chance to be with her. "Well, I'll see you around. Actually, I won't see you for a couple of weeks. I got a call from the Doom Patrol, they need help from an old friend. See ya, whenever."
Raven watched her jade crush walk away from her. She wasn't sure when she would see him again, but she didn't want this to be the last time, "Beast Boy,"
He faced her, "What, Rae?" he couldn't look into her amethyst eyes, he was too hurt and upset. Looking into her eyes would only make this day that much worse.
The psychic pushed herself up from her seat, "you don't understand, I like you too, but we wouldn't be good for one another."
Keep it sweet, Keep it slow, Let the future pass: Beast Boy finally looked up, he didn't say anything. Just walked toward her. Lifting both his hands he placed them on Raven's face. He contemplated kissing her again, but decided to let her make the decisions.
It felt as though hours had gone by when she finally looked away, "I'm sorry, Beast Boy, no."
His hands fell from her face, "I'm leaving around ten tonight. I'll be on the roof if you wanna talk." Without another word he walked to his room. Anger burning his face.
Raven felt his anger for her stubbornness, his pain for being rejected, his embarrassment for failing, his reluctance for leaving, his confusion for what she had said. Raven would have liked nothing more than to show her own emotions and cry, but that would result in the end of the tower. Instead she flew to her room to meditate.
BBxRAE BBxRAE BBxRAE
And don't let go: "BEAST BOY! NO!" Raven emerged from her trance with a jolt. What time was it? She looked to her clock. 9:55. Beast Boy was leaving in only minutes and she had to make it to him before he left. She had to tell him the truth. Phasing through her roof so she didn't have to face the other titans before being able to face him.
Within seconds, she was atop the roof looking at the green light of her life. He was looking over the ocean, getting ready to change into an animal. "Beast Boy, wait." he turned his head over his shoulder.
"Rae?" his voice was barely a whisper but it carried to her and flowed over her.
She moved closer to him, "you were right, BB, I just don't know how to handle this." she wished she could make the tone of her voice alter to match her emotions, but that would give her completely away. Make her weak and vulnerable.
BB turned to her, "are you ready to do this with me?"
She looked away, "I don't know." her voice never missed her normal pitch.
He nodded, "Alright, then, I'm leaving. Bye." he faced the other direction in attempt to leave.
Raven grabbed hold of his arm, "Don't. I don't know if I'll ever be ready for it. But I do want to try with you." she slid her fingers down his arm to his hand where she placed her own hand.
Beast Boy gripped her hand firmly, "that's all I'm asking for, Rae."
But tonight I could fall too soon under this beautiful moonlight: "Sit with me?" he hooked his thumb in the direction of the tower's edge.
She nodded slowly, still unsure. He sat and pulled her down with him. Their feet danced in the night air as she watched the moon reflect off the ocean like life reflected off of Beast Boy's eyes whenever she saw him. "Beast Boy, I'm not going to lie. This is weird."
Her green hero just snickered, "I know what you mean, Rae."
The two heroes had talked for hours, until his Goth raven fell asleep in his lap. They sat on the roof until the sun washed over them.
But you're so hypnotizing, You've got me laughing while I sing, You've got me smiling in my sleep: While Raven slept she dreamt of mesmerizing emerald eyes that belonged to a boy who always made her laugh. She dreamt of a life she never thought possible for her. She dreamt of love and affection. Things she wasn't entirely sure she could ever feel.
A hand fell upon her shoulder, "Rae, Raven. Wake up. It's about 6 o'clock. We've been out here all night. And you need to get some actual sleep. Rae, wake up." she felt the corners of her lips twitch upwards. "Rae, I know you're awake."
Raven groaned, but lifted her head anyway. "Mmm, alright, I'm up. I am so tired." she stood from her spot on the roof and stretched.
Beast Boy chuckled, "me, too, Rae, me too. Come let's get to sleep. Oh, and I've decided I'm not going to leave anymore. I think there are more important things here." he clambered to his feet.
She rubbed the back of her neck, "Beast Boy, sleep with me tonight?" her voice had trailed off bit by bit with sleep.
The green boy's eyes doubled in size, "really? Are you sure, Raven?" he calmed himself down slightly, not wanting to sound over zealous.
She nodded her head, "yeah I think so."
"Alright, then, Rae. Come on." he grabbed her hand again started for the stairs.
They were back in the tower, wandering the halls, hand in hand, "where do you want to go, Rae?"
Raven hadn't thought of this, she didn't want to go into her room. It was too personal and she wasn't ready to reveal her whole being to him in such a way. "Let's go to your room?"
Beast Boy grinned, "I was hoping you would say that." he led her to his domain. In the middle of the room was a massive bed.
"Uh… why is it so big?"
His cheeks grew warm with embarrassment, "well, sometimes I change into bigger animals before I sleep."
"Oh, nice." Raven smiled.
Beast Boy got into the bed and Raven followed. He decided to sleep in his human form. She cuddled in close. Her back against his front. They slept well into the afternoon. Only woken by the titans pounding on the door looking for them.
BBxRAE BBxRAE BBxRAE
And I can see this unraveling: Raven woke up lazily. She stretched her arms out and hit Beast Boy in his head, causing an 'oof' sound to radiate from him. She shot up quickly, forgetting where she was and what had happened last night. Beside her a small kitten appeared. It cuddled up against her thigh. Raven petted the top of his head, "So, cute, Beast Boy." She smiled sweetly. Raven had noticed her voice had taken on a more emotional tone. It no longer had the monotone pitch. At least not completely. She wondered why this was. Could it be Beast Boy? Could it be the way he made her feel? This was too new for her.
You're love is where I'm falling, But please don't catch me: How could this have happened? She never thought it would be possible for her to…love…someone. Wait, she didn't even know if that's what was happening here. And if it was, did she want it to stop? Did she want to go back to her days of monotone, black and white colors and empty bliss? Maybe she could have new days filled with laughter, smiles and colors. She wanted to believe it was possible. She needed to believe it.
Beast Boy transformed back to his usual green self, "Afternoon, Rae. How'd you sleep?" he nuzzled her neck.
Raven smiled at him, "I slept well. And you?"
"Nothing short of awesome, of course. I had the most amazing girl by my side."
See this heart, won't settle down: If it were possible, Raven's grin grew larger. She got the weird sensation she usually got when she was about to unleash her energy on something. Except this time, she hadn't wanted to release it. The bed, her and Beast Boy included, levitated in the air. "Rae, what's going on?" Beast Boy gripped to the edge of his sleeping quarters with everything he had.
NO! This wasn't supposed to happen. She had thought her emotions were in check, but being with him only made it worse, "Beast Boy, I'm sorry. I don't know why I can't be with you and have my powers in check. I just don't know." Raven floated to the ground, leaving Beast Boy and the bed in the air. "I'm so sorry." she whispered the apology, hoping he heard.
Like a child running scared from a clown: "Ahhhhh!" Raven let the yell form in her throat and be released into the afternoon sky. Why did this have to happen? Why couldn't she just be normal? Damn her father to the fiery pits of hell!
The over whelming feelings scared her almost as much as her father had. Almost as much as she scared herself. She didn't want to be without Beast Boy, but if it came down to her sanity and being with him. Her decision wasn't going to matter.
I'm terrified of what you do: Could she seriously rest her whole life, the way her life used to be, the way her life is now, the way her life would be, in the palms of a green changeling? Would it be worth the pain she would feel? Raven would like to think so, but she wasn't sure. Not sure at all.
Raven composed her face into her unfeeling mask and phased through the roof and into the tower. She had to make it to her room, before anyone found her. Before they interrogated her about what was going on between her and BB. She wouldn't have known how to answer them. She had to get to her room. To meditate, to think.
My stomach screams just when I look at you: As she walked by the kitchen she heard that familiar voice. The one that turned her whole world upside down. "Have you guys seen Raven?" She curved her head and saw his green body. He was talking to the others. Was he trying to find her?
She ducked her body behind the wall and peeked her head out. Sure enough, there he was asking the titans if they had seen her. They all shook their heads no, until Cyborg saw her. He looked at her questioning ready to state what he was seeing, but Raven swung her head rapidly, signaling him to shut up. He understood.
Run far away, So I can breathe: Raven ran down the halls and into her room. He can't find me, I won't let him, she repeated the thought over and over. Hoping it would stick, it didn't. The turmoil inside her was getting worse. It was all his fault. He made her this way, didn't he?
Even though you're far from suffocating me: She sat in her meditating area, crossed her legs and chanted. No, he didn't do anything to her. No a thing. He made her feel alive. Made her feel something a side from the dulling abyss. He wasn't suffocating her, in fact he was giving her life. Giving her air.
I can't set my hopes to high: Think nothing of it! The voice in her head yelled with passion. It was true she couldn't let herself get too excited about anything. Nothing goes the way she planned it to be. Beast Boy was the proof of that. She hadn't planned on lo…liking him so much. And yet here she was, uncertain if what she was feeling was real or if she was dreaming. Dammit all to hell. If she let herself get too close to Beast Boy to like him too much, it wouldn't last long. Nothing in her life ever did.
Cuz every hello ends with a good-bye: No one in her life ever lasted long. He would leave her like everyone else had in her life. The titans were the closest thing she had to a family and had settled with them for the most continued time, but how long would that last? She could not and would not put her life on the line on the off chance that Beast Boy, Garfield, might be different. Could she? Would she?
BANG! BANG!
So now you see, Why I'm scared: A knock sounded at the door. She jumped from her vicinity and tip toed to the door. Looking through the peep hole she saw the green boy in question. BANG! BANG! "Go away, Beast Boy! Leave me alone!" She didn't want to answer the door, she didn't have to. BANG! BANG! "Please, go away, Beast Boy." But then again she might not have a choice. BANG! BANG! "I don't want to open the door." Nope, she most definitely didn't have a choice. BANG! BANG! "Alright, fine, I'm opening the door."
She did as she said she would, he stood before worried and yet angry at the same time. "Whatever this is about you need to tell me. I don't care if it's about you not wanting to be with me. I just need to know, so I'm not chasing a dream here, Rae." Beast Boy came in her room with a goal in mind. Get to the bottom of the situation. He did not plan on Raven falling to her knees crying. He did not plan on watching her entire room be destroyed with every tear that fell from her lavender eyes.
"Rae! Rae! Rae, stop. Calm down." nothing he said stopped the tears. He fell beside her encasing her body in his arms, "Rachel. Rae. Raven. Please stop crying. Hold me back. We'll get through this. Come on," he spoke each word with earnest. He spoke them slowly, trying to get through to her.
I can't open up my heart without a care: Gradually, her body stopped shaking, her energy came back into her, her tears ceased flowing. Raven looked up at Beast Boy. "why do you do this to me? Why do you make me lose all control? Don't you get it! If we were to be together I'd destroy you. I'd destroy without realizing it. For no reason, other than the fact you may have looked at me wrong. I. Am. Dangerous. Beast Boy. You're better off just leaving." she snarled the words through her teeth.
BB looked down at her, "You know what, Rae? I've got something to say to you. One: I'm real sick of you telling me no. Two: I'm not sorry for making you feel. I'm not sorry for liking you. I'm not sorry for making you lose control. I'm not sorry for any of it. But what I am sorry for is that I didn't do it sooner. Rae, why don't YOU get it? Why don't you understand, I'm not leaving. Danger's my middle name, baby. So bring all the danger you got."
But here I go, It's what I feel: Raven felt her face relax, he was serious about this. Was it possible? A huge weight seemed to have lifted from her shoulders. The weight of uncertainty. Was all she needed was a response from him like this one? All she needed to know if she could freely lov…like him was to know if she could trust him. "If there was a time to be serious it's right now, Beast Boy. Are you serious about this?"
He only gave her a one word answer, "yes."
And for the first time in my life I know it's real: Raven's heart soared, that one little word broke her through her fear, her insecurities and went right to her soul. She buried her head into his shoulder. She felt the weight of his head laying atop her own. "Thank you Beast Boy."
He brushed his head against her hair, "Any time, Rae."
And if this is love, Please don't break me: "Garfield?" she tried out the foreign word.
He laughed softly, his name sounded funny on her tongue, "Yeah?"
Her voice was quiet, "If this is what's really going to happen, please don't let me fall."
Beast Boy had never heard her voice so warmhearted, she was really starting to change and fast, "I wouldn't dream of it, Raven. I don't want to hurt you."
I'm giving up, So just catch me: She smiled to herself, "I love you."
Triumph over powered his expression, "I love you, too."