A.N Here it is...

Team: Tutshill Tornadoes

Position: Chaser 3

Writing about: A settlement/colonisation (Jamestown)

Title: New America

Words: 2,477 (Using doc manager before adding A.N)

Prompts used: 5. "If You Want to be Happy" by Jimmy Soul, 10. "Someday" by Nickleback, 12. A Lament by Oscar Wilde

(Prompts explained below)

For those of you innocent people who stumble upon this one-shot and are unaware of my speaking of Quidditch, teams and nonsense, it is alright! This is for a sort of contest on a forum and nothing that you aren't allowed to read, so enjoy!

Disclaimer: Characters and all other recognizable written words such as 'wand' belong to J.K Rowling.

The name is Charles Cameron Clarke. Don't laugh. My mother thinks she has such a funny sense of humour.

Now, I'm being shipped off to the new America with a team to protect Muggles from Magical Creatures.

Jamestown, here I come.

"Charles Clarke." my boss called.

My mother gave me that lovely name. She thinks she has such a funny sense of humour. In fact, my middle name starts with a 'C'! It's Cameron.

"Yes?" I asked, pretending to work by shuffling paper.

Mondays are always a bore; nothing exciting ever happens concerning my job. I work in the Muggle branch. However, I get the much less exciting bit of the job, so much unlike my co-workers.

Working through muggle profiles who are related to muggle-borns, married, etc. I'm in the muggle Liaison office of my department. My co-workers get to perform obliviations and actually get out there. I'm stuck in a ruddy office all day sorting through paperwork.

"I have a job for you." my boss continued, coming to stand in front of my desk.

She slammed some paperwork down on it.

"What might that be?" I frowned.

I was curious. My boss rarely ever came to me with a job directly. Sure, she would speak to me about certain things, such as if I had cleaned a toilet.

I mean it! Some git cursed a toilet to spit out gunk and toilet paper, constantly! I was stuck with that bloody toilet for a week. I think the smell is still on me and it haunts me to this day.

I cursed Travers for going on holiday. Him and his bloody poetry along with his bloody jolly smile that is on his face all the bloody, bloody time! Making me bloody smell like a bloody rubbish bin in a bloody mud pool. Causing me to bloody substitute for his bloody position.

I swear that's why I don't have a girlfriend. Probably planned the whole thing, the git.

"As I said, I have a job for you." my boss told me, annoyed. "I'm sending you off to help the American ministry."

My boss is called Fiona Maxwell. She has piercing grey eyes and dark black hair always up in a-what was it? A Pony-bum? A Nun? Something like that.

Fiona Maxwell is the most terrifying person on this planet.

And she just has to be my boss.

Joy.

"What?" I asked. "You're shipping me off to America?"

Then I leant forwards, squinting my eyes at her suspiciously.

"Did Travers set you to this?" I asked.

"No." Fiona said, glaring. "This job is important! The Magical Creatures Department has requested some assistance from two workers in the Muggle Department."

"Why have they requested me?" I questioned. "Am I really the best of this lot? Can't say I'm surprised."

"I wouldn't place myself that high on the scale if I were you." Fiona sniffed. "They just need someone who knows loads about muggles. No matter how much of a thick-headed git they are; like you."

"Well, that is loads better than you calling me a stuck-up prat, isn't it?" I said positively.

"Read through the papers." Fiona dismissed, turning on her heel and back to her office. "You're leaving Friday."

Oh, how we flirt.

I searched the papers and found that many of my questions were being answered. For example, how I would be fed. Was it some nice warm and utterly delicious chicken? Or was it some juicy fruit? These things are quite important, I find.

There was only one question to be answered.

Who was the fellow co-worker coming with me?

"Don't you think it's lovely?"

I glared up at Travers. We were currently in a clearing of a forest, as far as I could tell anyway.

"Yes, just brilliant." I grumbled. "Now, would you get off?"

We had, unfortunately, travelled by Port Key. Travers landed upon me, sitting on my stomach. Of course, Travers had ruined my day already. He spilled tea on me this morning, then insisted he clean it. Travers, being the thick-headed dolt he is, used the wrong spell. He set my robes on fire.

Fire! I do not see how you could mess up Scourgify with Incendio!

"Oh, sorry." Travers, the git, apologized. "I'm quite excited!"

"For what?" I asked, annoyed. "All we're doing is meeting with a few ministry workers and helping to establish the muggle colonists because of the extraordinary amount of magical creatures."

"Yes, yes." Travers said, rolling his eyes. "However, few wizards get such an experience to come here into the wilderness! Especially in Jamestown."

"That's because the wizards who don't, actually have enough sense!" I argued. "I miss my warm bathes already."

"Just think, Mr. Clarke!" Travers continued. "We'll be the first to watch this muggle colonization!"

"Hello, over there!" a voice called. "Are you from the muggle branch?"

The two of us turned towards it, staring at the speaker.

The speaker had greying red hair with sparkling blue eyes. He was slightly hunched over, his face and hands wrinkled with age. He had rectangular shaped glasses perched on his nose.

"Er-yes?" Travers said, responding to the man's question.

"Well, good day. Good day to you both!" The man said in a jovial manner, shaking our hands. "My name is Professor Frank MacDonald."

Not another Travers.

"Pleasure." I told him, frowning. "My name is Charles Clarke."

"Ah," he smiled. "Then you must be Wesley Travers."

"Right you are, sir!" Travers said, grinning.

"Now, your job is to help our team with the muggles." MacDonald's face turned serious as he explained. "I'm afraid the majority of us lack muggle knowledge. This will be quite suspicious to them and potentially lead to a burning at the stake."

"Alright." Travers nodded, resolutely. "I'll help you every step of the way!"

What a...dog! A little, loyal dog, awaiting orders.

"Good man!" MacDonald grinned once again.

He thumped Travers' back.

"Now, my team, you two and I will be staying in the Jamestown settlement." MacDonald continued. "We must keep all suspicions low. My team and I are here to protect the colonising muggles and keep the magical creatures under security."

"Ma-professor?" I began, grabbing his attention.

"Yes?" he asked.

"What if the settlement does find out? There will most definitely be too many to obliviate."

"Yes," MacDonald agreed. "That is why we need extreme caution."

Dear Mum,

Could you send me some cooking? I do not find the food here as edible as back home. You see, they serve food such as wild berries that could be poison and rabbits. Rabbits! There is not a chicken in sight! Not an egg to be eaten or some nice ham off a pig! I would rather eat the fish that come in.

Honestly, they should provide better service.

I've been sleeping well, or rather, when Travers isn't sleeping. His snoring is as loud as an ironbelly's! As well, we're one room apart! I can't cast a silencio spell on him as I'm sure I would be sleeping when he wakes up.

I know you're going to ask about my work.

All I'm doing really is helping the others with their knowledge of muggles. Lucky dad was a muggle-born, huh?

I'll update you as soon as you send me food.

Your son,

Charles

It has been a week. A blasted week.

I've got bitten by bugs day and night! I do need to find the spell for fending off the bloody things.

Today, the Creature department wishes for me to come with them on an investigation while Travers holds down the fort. Ha! Best of luck to the poor sods who have to speak to him!

I'm currently sitting in the muggle inn's bar. They've started up some song about marrying an ugly girl. Don't know what they're on about. Muggle's sure are strange.

I left back to my room to grab some things for the small trip.

"How the hell did we wind up like this? Why weren't we able, to see the signs that we missed. And try turn the tables-"

That's Travers singing in the shower by the way. His voice is horrible if you can't tell. I'm glad I'll be gone for the rest of the day.

We've been travelling for ages. How long does it take to get up a bloody mountain?

Oh right, three hours.

"Can we stop?" I groaned, taking one more step before falling down.

"Ah, no worries, Clarke!" MacDonald's voice sounded, much like a trumpet. "We have arrived."

I looked up and saw a dark cave. It was the largest bloody cave I've ever seen! It's big enough to hold a hundred hippogriphs, maybe! I wonder what they were looking for.

"So," I started nervously. "What is it the lot of you need to find?"

"There are villagers that speak of this mountain as a 'fire breather'." second in command Emma Bridgewater said, mysteriously. "They say that anyone who goes, never returns."

I stared at her with wide-eyes.

Emma Bridgewater was almost like Fiona Maxwell. Only thing is, she actually seeked me out, finding enjoyment from scaring me out of my wits. Plus, she had hazel eyes and blonde hair instead of Fiona's grey eyes and black hair.

"Don't scare the poor lad." MacDonald said. "We're only looking for a dragon."

"A dragon?" I squeaked.

In a very non-manly way, embarrassingly enough.

"Yea, you'll only get a few scorch marks probably." Emma shrugged, smirking. "Now, come on!"

She headed towards the cave, with her team walking behind, laughing. Mental, they are! Who's happy about walking towards their potential death? They clearly are, it seems.

"Come on mummy's boy! We have work to do!" Emma yelled.

I glared at her, before standing up and jogging over.

They all entered the cave and I watched them go in.

Ok, I can simply walk behind them and be the first to get out if I hear or see anything dangerous. Good plan.

When I walked into the darkness, I could see the lit up wands from the others. I cast a quick 'lumos'. Emma waved her wand hand, indicating to follow her. We did.

The darkness is very, scary. I don't know what's out there. Even though the team said a dragon, you can't be too sure, can you? I felt like something was watching me. The hairs on the back of my neck stood up.

Then I was prodded by something in the back.

I leapt forwards, a yelp escaping my lips. I turned around and saw a grinning Emma. How did she get behind me?

The team all glanced back, shushing me.

"Wait." MacDonald commanded.

We all stopped, watching him.

"You all hear that?" He asked.

It was then I became aware of the fact that there were sounds like thunder rolling in the distance, nearby. I saw Emma out of the corner of my eye, smile happily.

She's mental.

We walked awhile more until MacDonald halted us again.

"Look." he whispered, looking over the rock we were behind.

I looked. The sight before me caused my eyes to nearly pop out.

The creature was a deep blue colour, it's scales glittering prettily in the light. The spike along it's back seemed almost feathery as it quivered.

It was a dragon.

It was a dragon whose eyes just opened from slumber.

Bloody hell.

Dear Mum,

I nearly died today.

No, I am not dead. I NEARLY died.

Why?

Because of a (pardon my language) bloody dragon!

My team thought it would be utterly brilliant if we went out and looked for it. They were prepared for any dragon. Of course, they did not know about this new species.

I have burns all up my arm and some up my back. It happened because I pushed the second in command out of the dragon's fire-breathing path.

I think she likes me now.

Anyway, because it would be extremely suspicious to go back with burns all over my body, I have to stay in the forest for the night while the potions settle.

Who knows what is out there.

Wish me luck,

Charles

P.S Thank you for the pastries.

I reached over to Potato, my owl, groaning all the while. My whole body hurt. Potato made a small hoot, before leaving through the tent flap.

It's been three hours in this tent and nothing has happened. Honestly, I'm getting quite bored.

It's just reached the fifth hour.

My clock just reached the five.

I'm hearing rustling outside, I'm going to check it out.

I stepped out of the tent and looked around with a frown. There was no sign of anything moving at all.

I heard the rustle again.

"Hello?" I called out.

There was silence.

Then the rustling started again, only louder and closer. I reached for my pocket, slowly pulling out my wand. I pointed it at a pair trees that stood side by side, their brush hiding any view of what was behind it.

The branches began to move, the tree swaying.

"C-c-come out!" I commanded.

Admittedly, I am afraid.

Something white stepped out.

Now I'll pause here for suspense.

You ready?

It was a toilet.

Not just any toilet.

The toilet.

The one that haunts me to this day. The one that Travers left me to while he was off on holidays.

How the hell am I supposed to kill it?

The bloody thing is hopping towards me.

"Incendio!" I shouted.

Bright red flames enclosed it, but the bloody thing did not hesitate. I backed up, but fell over. It kept coming towards me...

"AGGHH!"

I sat up, eyes wide.

I blinked.

Where was the toilet?

I was in a completely different place.

A room.

My bedroom.

On my bed.

I just woke up.

It all clicked into my head.

"Charlie?" a voice asked.

I turned, staring at the blue eyes.

"Uh, yes, mum?"

She was at my door, her favourite book of poems, in hand("The complete works of Oscar Wildes, including The Lament, A Vision, A Fragrant, and more!").

Her light brown hair which matched my own, was tied up. She was wearing a robe and had a muggle in hand. Looking outside my window, I saw it was still night.

"Have a bad dream?"

"Yes," I nodded slowly.

"Alright, want some tea?" she asked. "It calms the nerves."

"Uh-" I paused. "Yes, I'd like that."

"You can tell me all about that 'bloody toilet' while we sit."

"H-how did you know about that?"

My mum winked and left the room.

It was weird how I had had a dream about Jamestown. After all, I was born there and hadn't been anywhere near it for ages.

I laid back, staring at the ceiling while pulling back my ruffled hair.

"It was all a dream." I muttered. "Merlin."

A.N Sooo, this was probably the most terrible fic you have ever read. Maybe.

It depends what you read.

The ending is up to you really. Is he magical or just a harry-potter book fan who had a crazy dream? You decide!

I don't know about you, but I really like this character. I personally think he's a complete and utter dweeb, but I love those people. They're fun to write.

So, promptsy-promptsy-prompts! Let me just first say it was really hard to fit it all in with the timeline. That is why I ended it as a dream. *gives a toothy grin with two thumbs up, probably looking creepy*

Prompts explained here!:

5."If You Want to be Happy" by Jimmy Soul: Right, I thought this was a great song for a bar, and so I put it there. I don't think Charlie would bother listening to muggles because he gets confused by them, even though he works in the muggle part of the ministry, he's Charlie. Insert shrug. A really odd character.

10. "Someday" by Nickleback: I honestly like the Nickleback songs. I don't know why people hate them. So, I did the first few lyrics as Travers singing them in the wash-room. Again, Charlie would blank it out because he wouldn't want to acknowledge it anymore. Also, again, complicated to put in.

12. A Lament by Oscar Wilde: I really didn't know how to go about this one the most. It just didn't fit. Originally, I was going to make Travers the one who spat out poems at random points. So, I settled on Charlie's mum being the one who presented the prompt instead.

I was going to make Charlie wake up in work and Fiona actually being his girlfriend. However, that obviously didn't happen.

He's also lived in Britain for awhile, just born in Jamestown (I picked Jamestown because it was the first huge settlement apparently. I'm alright with writing war, just not about such things as this)

Also, for the American Ministry, I believe the wizarding world found the continent first. They already established the american wizardry there and all of their buildings are covered with spells. They are just starting out, of course so they need a bit of help. Especially with keeping the muggles at bay.

Cheers!

Lupe