Hey there! So I started this story a few months ago, but it never turned out as good as I'd hoped. After reading The Indigo Spell I got so many ideas and rewrote the entire story.
This takes place directly after TIS and it is written from Zoe's POV.
Disclaimer: it all belongs to Richelle Mead.
Enjoy!
As the needle touched my skin I tried not to flinch.
Getting inked hurt a lot more than I would have thought, but I kept my mouth shut knowing that no matter how much I complained, I'd never get any sympathy here.
I couldn't help wondering what my sister, Sydney, would be doing now if she knew I was coming to Palm Springs. Probably find some way to keep me at home, I guess.
I had been angry with her for a long time. When she'd first stolen my assignment I'd been furious she'd made me look weak in my father's and the other alchemists' eyes.
Seeing her at Christmas had changed my feelings though, I was still mad at her, but also understood why she'd acted like she had.
Anyone knew getting all the credit for a successful assignment was what we all wanted, and so when she'd said she wanted all the glory, it shouldn't have surprised me that much. Sydney just never struck me as the selfish type.
My sister had called Stanton and told her she was in desperate need of another alchemist in Palm Springs. I didn't blame her, as excited I was about going on my very first assignment, I was not looking forward to being around them all the time.
Right now Sydney was oblivious to the fact that I was arriving just this afternoon. It was very untraditionally planned, because there was in fact no one who knew of my arrival, it had been Stanton's and my father's decision to send me there. I was still an alchemist in training, a junior, but Sydney was going to act as my mentor.
"There you go" the man who had inked me said, and I sat up, wincing a bit at my stinging cheek.
Holding up a heart-shaped compact mirror I saw the rather beautiful golden lily, promising a life full of making my father proud. I know my sister usually followed the rules this life brought upon us, the only exception being when she'd helped fugitive Rose Hathaway last year, and I hoped despite our recent disagreements we could still make this work between us.
I noticed how the girl in the mirror stared back with alien eyes. They looked wide and alert, and I realized just how much going to Palm Springs also seemed to frighten me. I put the mirror away and put on a brave face. I wasn't about to let anyone see me scared.
"Zoe" my father called, and I instantly turned to him, tilting my head to one side showing off the tattoo.
"Hmm" was my father's only comment and I hoped it meant he was happy I was finally part of the group.
My mother stood leaning against the door, her arms wrapped around herself. She looked so fragile like that like one touch could make her shatter into a million pieces.
It was hard enough to have one daughter gone, and only being able to talk to her few times a month, losing me now too…it had to be unbearable.
I walked to where she was standing and she cupped my face in her hands. She looked at the tattoo with so much disgust, I almost pulled away, but when her eyes met mine they filled with love and tears.
"Tell Sydney to take real good care of you" she whispered, her voice hoarse, like she was fighting back tears.
"I will," I promised, my mom nodded causing the tears in her eyes to spill over, but she didn't move to wipe them away.
"It's time to go now" my father said his voice indifferent from when he had spoken before, and I felt like yelling at him. How could he act so cold when my beloved mother was so obviously broken?
But of course I didn't. I acted like a good little alchemist; I kept my mouth shut and did as I was told.
I mostly adored my father; he was smart and very well respected amongst the alchemists. Being Jared Sage's daughter was certainly going to help me gain some respect amongst the other alchemists.
But even behind all that adoration was a feeling of neglect. He had always seen Sydney as his favorite daughter, but in the light of recent events, I had gotten her place.
Whenever it came to the way he treated my mom however, I hated him. He was cold and distant, it made my heart ache to see her like this and having him act so apathetic around her broke something inside of me.
"And tell Sydney that I miss her" my mother spoke slowly, as if every word hurt to say out loud.
"Okay" I said, and hugged her "It's all going to be okay" I whispered into her hair and took one last breath of the wonderful smell of being home and safe.
I had never met a vampire in my life. Of course I'd been lectured about them from my father. I already knew they were disgusting, blood-drinking creatures.
Sydney had seemed reluctant about me meeting Jill and the others here. I suppose she was trying to keep me safe for as long as possible. I had to act strong though, I was going to have to pretend to be in control and not show my weakness.
Sydney and I got out of the car I had been giving at my arrival. Apparently Sydney's car had been damaged recently and we had to share mine, which meant Sydney had been given mine, since I didn't have a license yet. I looked at the apartment complex where Adrian Ivashkov lived. He was waiting inside along with the rest of our 'family'.
"Zoe" Sydney said before we walked inside. She'd stopped and so did I.
"Yes?" I asked looking back at the apartment and then at her face. She looked stressed but that was no wonder. We were about to walk inside a vampire's apartment. I couldn't ignore the fact that I was starting to feel queasy as well.
"These vampires…well they have been on their best behavior since we got here. I know you're scared and I know you probably hate them already…but try and be professional" she said. I hadn't expected her to say something like that, and her kind words took me by surprise. Had they been on their best behavior? What did that mean; they only killed one person a week?
"Of course I'll act professional. I am an alchemist" I said proudly and was surprised to here her melancholic voice respond.
"Yes you are."
"Look there's the mini Sage," a vampire with incredible green eyes and messy brown hair said, as Sydney and I walked inside Adrian Ivashkov's apartment. Sydney gave him a look, which clearly spoke back off. To my intense surprise the boy obeyed.
"I'm Adrian" he said, and gave me a smile. He reached out to shake my hand but my limps felt frozen. He looked at Sydney for just a second and then he gave me a polite nod, and took a few steps away.
"And that's Angeline, Eddie, Neil, and Jill" Sydney finished; they all smiled as she spoke their names. I made a mental note to write them down soon, so I wouldn't forget.
I made sure to stand close to Sydney. I couldn't help staring at these creatures in front of me. Some looked almost human like Eddie, Neil or Angeline, but then Jill and Adrian were more notably different.
As Sydney talked to the group, I tried to take in every motion she did, or word she said. In my eyes Sydney was the symbol of perfection, she knew how to dress and talk properly.
I knew that the key to becoming a great alchemist was doing everything the way she did it, without helping a fugitive escape prison obviously.
I made a promise to myself then that during my time in Palm Springs, when things got difficult, I would ask myself; what would Sydney do? Hopefully by doing so, I would soon be better at my job.
"How old are you?" I only picked up the question, because it was a new voice speaking.
"Zoe?" Sydney asked, and I realized the question had been pointed at me.
"Excuse me?" I asked, and Sydney smiled patiently.
"Jill was just asking how old you are," Sydney explained and my eyes found the girl.
She had light-brown curly hair, and jade colored eyes. She had a body like a super model, and was very tall. Something about her posture seemed at bit fragile though, and I noticed she couldn't be much older than I am.
"I'm fifteen" I spoke in a low voice, but only because I knew if I spoke any louder, my voice would give away just how frightened I really was.
"Me too" Jill said, smiling warmly at me "Are you excited about going to Amberwood?" I realized then, that the Moroi girl talking to me was really just trying to be friendly. But all I could think about was her being a vampire; I could just imagine how she would drink my blood in the middle of the night.
I felt dizzy just being in the same room as all these uhm, people. Since I had started training to become an alchemist, the most important rule had always been that vampires were unnatural, evil creatures who under all circumstances were not to be trusted.
Sydney placed a hand on my back, and I found myself holding my breath, and tried to relax a bit more.
I felt like the walls were closing in around me, and I grabbed hold of Sydney's hand to steady myself but it was too late. I felt my legs collapse under me, and watched the floor get closer and closer.
"Zoe?!" Someone shook my shoulder, and I blinked my eyes open, taking a few seconds to readjust to the light.
I was lying on the couch in Adrian's living room, but no one but Sydney was around.
"Zoe, are you all right?" Sydney's eyes were wide with panic and worry, and I instantly felt bad for scaring her like that.
"Yes, yeah I'm fine" I said sitting up; the room seemed to be spinning around, so I closed my eyes and inhaled slowly.
"You scared me" she breathed and looked more tired than ever before. Another wave of guilt passed through me.
"I don't know what happened, one moment I was fine and the next-"
"It's okay Zoe, you don't have to apologize. I know it can be very overwhelming at the beginning, but I promise you it will get better. You'll get more used to it" she spoke softly and I realized her words sounded exactly like what my mother would have said and tears welled up in my eyes.
"I'm still sorry" I said, then added "I miss mom" Sydney then hugged me and put her hand on my hair and stroked it.
"Sydney, I'm sorry about today, I don't know what happened. One moment I was fine, but then Jill started talking to me, and she's one of them, and I just freaked out!"
We were back in our room at Amberwood. I was still apologizing about today, the more time went by the more embarrassed I felt. So much for not being scared.
"Zoe stop apologizing, it's fine. When I first got here I almost fainted too" I knew it was a lie. Sydney had always been strong and she was just trying to make me feel better. I didn't comment on it though.
"Thanks Sydney, I want to be strong like you-I really do. It's just so…weird to have to spend all my time with vampires" I said, and as she nodded.
I couldn't help watching how sad her eyes looked. Was something bothering her? Earlier I thought she'd been nervous about me meeting everyone but now I realized maybe it was something else. I was going to have to find out.
"About Jill…" she began, her voice a bit hesitant.
"Yes?" I asked, a bit nervous. What about her? Was she really going to feed off me? My worst nightmare had always been a vampire drinking my blood.
"She really is a good girl, a good person. She is very talkative, especially when she's nervous. Does that remind you of someone?" she asked and I blushed. That sounded just like me.
"But she is a very good friend, and she'll back you up anytime. Give her a chance" Sydney said, and I almost felt like she could have read my mind about the blood sucking. I also noticed this was the second time today Sydney had been trying to convince me how nice these creatures were.
"I hate that you know me so well" I said, and Sydney half-smiled.
"Yeah well, there have to be some upsides being the oldest one of us" she said and then gave me a quick hug.
"Breathe," she reminded me and I took a deep breath. I felt much better being in this room, with no vampires walking around. It was nice to be able to catch my breath. With every second I had spent in the company of the vampires tonight, every breath I'd taken had felt like a struggle.
We were both lying in our beds. The room was dark and the only noise I could hear was my sister's breathing.
"Sydney? Are you asleep?" I whispered into the room.
"What's wrong?" she asked "Can't you sleep?" concern already showed in her voice.
"No I just…I wanted to say I'm sorry" I whispered and waited for her response. It came instantly.
"About what?" she asked, I started twirling a piece of brown hair around my finger.
"About the way I acted last time we were together. I should've talked to you when you called mom and asked for me. I've been acting like a child," I whispered and now Sydney waited before answering. I had a feeling she was considering what to say.
"Zoe" something about the way she said my name let me know that I was forgiven.
"You're fifteen. No one is expecting you to know how to handle a highly stressful situation like that. The fact that you're apologizing now just shows me how much you've grown the last few months" she paused and I let the words sink in.
"Last Christmas when you and dad were there in St. Louis I couldn't help thinking how much you've grown. Last time I saw you, you were a child. Now, at fifteen, you're already showing how strong you are" I could tell without actually seeing her face that she was smiling.
"I fainted" I pointed out and could feel myself blush. Saying it out loud made it feel so much more real.
To my intense surprise Sydney laughed.
"Zoe! Honey that's okay, you're human and you're still in training. You're allowed to make mistakes, and you're going to make mistakes, lots of them. But so have I, even dad has made mistakes. It's part of growing up, it's what makes us human," she said and hearing her say that made me appreciate her even more. It's what makes us human.
I wanted nothing more than to stay human.
"Thank you Sydney" I whispered and wrapped my arms around myself.
It was all going to be okay, if Sydney said so, I had to believe her. I still felt guilty about how I'd accused her of stealing my assignment last time I saw her but talking to her now, she seemed more than willing to forgive me.
I listened to Sydney's breathing, and felt my body relax. It had been a very long, very stressful day. But I surprised myself by finding it successful.
Maybe tomorrow would be easier, maybe I would learn to see the vampires as -maybe not exactly friends- but I hoped I'd soon learn how to handle being around them, as my sister seemed to have and maybe –just maybe-I would actually going to like staying here.