Ok, I'm a REALLY bad author. I mean I keep getting writers block! Oh my goodness! Its been like what? A month or two since I've actually posted!? Jeez, I need to get back to writing this is depressing. Anyway, This story is a two shot and I just needed to get it out of my head so I could go back to writing on my other stories. Press the pretty green… WTF! ITS NOT GREEN ANYMORE! EVIL WEBSITE CHANGED IT! *grumbles* Anyway, I don't own SO if I did princess Akiko would not be Massahiro's love interest and…well you'll see
Massahiro POV
I stretched my arms above my head, sighing in satisfaction as my joints popped into place.
"Are you done yet Masahiro-dono?" I flinched at the lack of insult attached to the name. My eyes found the white mononoke that was waiting impatiently for me perched on a table nearby. Mokun's tail flicked anxiously as his red eyes gazed steadily at me.
"Yes, I just finished." I confirmed, rising from the cushion, "We can go home now." I hardly recognized the formal voice I spoke to him in as I walked down the dorms were empty as we made our way out. The sun had long since disappeared from the sky. My eyes wandered down to the creature beside me, he no longer rode on my shoulder as he once had. I sighed silently, my eyes finding the sky but not focusing on it. It had been 3 years since Gurren had lost his memories of my. It was something I never got used to. Even with him beside me now I felt alone. I never regretted the decision to call him back, but the feeling of loss was still rooted deep within me.
"Welcome back Masahiro." I started as the feminine came from beside me.
"Oh! Hello Kouchin." I gave her a timid smile as I regained my composure.
"My my, it isn't often that I get to sneak up on the great Abe no Masahiro." She laughed lightly. I gave her a mock glare.
"Masahiro!" Akiko called from the doorway, "You're home! Your mother has prepared dinner for us!"
"Coming!" I called back to her, rushing ahead. It made me feel a pang of now familiar pain when I realized the mononoke wasn't coming with me.
Akiko gave me a knowing smile as she led me inside. "It must be difficult for you Massahiro, I'm sorry."
"Don't worry Akiko, I'm alright." I gave her the most reassuring smile I could muster and she seemed appeased. I gave a silent sigh of relief and fixed my expression. It had become a talent of mine to hide my emotions in the last 3 years. It was my responsibility as an onmyouji to put others before my own needs after all.
Gurren POV
I gave a mental sigh of relief as we entered the Abe compound. I was now free of my duties. It wasn't that I hated the boy, he simply unnerved me. I leapt onto the high wall that surrounded the residence and watched the inner workings. My mind wandered as I closed my eyes. For three years I had been watching the boy as he went about his days. He was a decent enough Onmyouji from what I could tell, but nothing spectacular. Definitely not enough to have every shikigami that Seime controlled to be so dedicated to him. As if to prove my point I heard Masahiro preparing to leave for his nightly rounds. When the boy slept, I had no idea. As was also the ritual, Tai'in and Rikugo appeared beside him. He gave them a nod of greeting before beginning to walk into the night. I even sensed the ever angry Seiryu following him in the rooftops.
I gave an annoyed huff before settling my head on my paws. Another thing I didn't understand, Ko said that it was Seime's orders that I take on this form but it didn't make any sense, and I couldn't remember the order ever being given. But the most annoying of all my troubles was the boy himself. I had no memory of the teenager that was Seime's grandson, but yet not only did he know my name that only Seime called me, he had this look in his eyes. It wasn't the normal fear that I usually beheld, it was a trust, but clouded by an unexplainable sadness. I could never understand the boy. He was so young but aged in ways that were unexplainable. Of course that is not what infuriated me about him, what was the worst was my response to it! The undeniable urge to protect him if even the slightest amount of danger crossed his way, and the pain I felt every time I saw that look cross his face.
"What right does he have to have that look anyway? He's just a kid, he hasn't seen the struggles of life yet." I mused out loud. I had been completely absorbed in my thoughts that I did not notice Ko had come to sit beside me until she laughed.
"You would be surprised what that child has lived through. The decisions he has had to make and the consequences of said decisions are greater than what many men have made." Her voice turned dark as she seemed to get lost in thought.
"What are you talking about Ko?" I rolled my eyes at the absurdity of the comment.
Ko flinched and avoided my gaze, "It isn't important I suppose."
I growled in frustration as my curiosity was suppressed by her whims. "Why am I still here anyway? It's been years since I've returned to the spirit world and I'm exhausted from constantly watching over some kid, even if he is Seime's heir."
Kouchin bit her lip as she seemed to ponder something, suddenly her eyes cleared and she turned to me. She opened her mouth as if to speak but was cut off by the light voice of Seime, "Then why don't you return? Tai'in, Suzaku, or even Seriyu would be happy to take over as his guardian during the day I'm sure." The old man mused.
I felt a pang of… something as he bluntly stated my replacability. "Well, maybe I will," I said in defiance of whatever emotion had been called up, another infuriating thing about the boy, he always triggered unexplainable emotions in me.
"If you don't mind Seime, I will retake my place as his guardian. I do know him best considering I was his protector." Something rang wrong in her words, as if it was only a half truth and I turned to glare questioningly at her.
"Thank you, Ko, but I will leave the decision up to Masahiro when he returns, for now Gurren, you are free from you duties to return to the spirit world." I blinked in shock as I was so easily dismissed. It had only been my musings after all; I hadn't planned on actually leaving.
"You're leaving?" a soft voice came from just inside the garden. I turned to gaze at Masahiro as he reentered the residence in his Onmyouji clothing.
"Yes Masahiro," Seime answered for me, "Gurren is a spirit and it has been some time since he has returned to his realm. It is difficult for spirits of any kind to remain in this world for extended times. I have temporarily released him from the duty of being your guardian for him to return there for a time."
"I understand." The answer was plain and clearly stated but it stung as the finality of it rang in Masahiro's voice. The boy turned from his grandfather to gaze at me and on his face was a smile so sad it did not belong in this world. It seemed to release all the pain that had been hidden in his eyes over the past three years and let it appear on his face. "Thank you Touda." He bowed to me. I nodded in return, steadying my swirling head. I began to let myself go into the pull that would transport me home. Before the light could take me a whisper met my ears, "Goodbye Mokkun."
MPOV
The small mononoke disappeared from his spot on the wall in a glitter of light and I let my shoulders slump in defeat. My eyes closed as I reorganized my emotions. A hand was abruptly lain on my shoulder. I turned my watery gaze to the raven haired Shikigami that stared down at me in concern. Her look was almost motherly as she wrapped me in her arms.
"There there." She smoothed my hair as sobs began to course through me, "You did well Masahiro." For the first time in three years I let suppressed tears fall.
I don't remember ever returning to bed, but the next thing I was aware of was sunlight filtering in through the window.
GPOV
"Touda, it has been some time since you have been here." Tenku greeted as I appeared in the bright light of the spirit world in my humanoid form, "Why have you returned, are you not in charge of young Masahiro?"
"I have been relieved of those duties for the time being." I answered as I sat comfortably on a cushion near him.
"You wished to be relieved of those duties?" he asked, his grey eyebrow raising.
"Wow, something I never thought I'd hear Touda say, he's sick of Masahiro." Genbu laughed loudly, sounding like the child he appeared to be.
"What do you mean by that Genbu? He's just some kid, why wouldn't I get tired of watching him." I asked in a bitter tone.
"How can you say that?! You have no right to talk about him! You have no idea what he's been through!" Genbu's eyes narrowed dangerously as he glared at me.
"What are you talking about?" I shouted. The boy started in surprise before his expression turned reluctant.
"Touda, let me tell you a story about young Masahiro hmm?" the white haired man gave a forgiving nod to Genbu who now wore an expression of regret. "Some time ago the person he trusted the most was possessed by a demon and betrayed him, more specifically, he inflicted injuries that, had Ten'itsu not taken them upon herself, would have killed the boy. He was given a decision to make at that point in time. He could either kill his best friend to save the world or let his friend's soul be absorbed into darkness and the world would follow. The boy made the decision to kill his friend to save his soul, but instead of simply leaving it at that, he traded his own life for the person he cared most for. He called them back from the grave. However, in the afterlife Wakana sent him back, but in return, the memories of the one who had spent so much time with him would be erased."
"So the boy who you say has not lived through anything, now lives knowing that the one he trusted and cared for most lives still, but will never remember him." Genbu concluded for Tenku. I blinked, stunned at the pair before me. Genbu seemed to be looking at some distant memory while Tenku kept an impassive mask on.
"Enough worrisome talk," Tenku suddenly broke the silence, "Touda, you came here to rest, why don't you do so."
I nodded, leaving the room with thoughts swirling through my head.
"Call my name Masahiro!"
"Gurren!" the voice called through the darkness as I struggled. I felt a smile pull at my lips as I transformed. The demon's body that was trying to swallow me was immediately engulfed in flames. I shot out of the body to catch the falling figure dressed in red. I set the small boy down on the ground. The child shook his head to regain coherency before his eyes widened and he bolted toward the recovering demon.
"I have to save Mokkun!" he yelled. The demon roared at him as I chuckled in amusement, catching him once again.
"Hey, Seime's grandson, is that the best you can do?" I teased gently.
"It can't be, Mokkun?" his wide eyes grew wider in wonder as he stared at my transformed self.
My amusement continued to grow, "My name is Gurren; did you hit your head and forget me already?"
"Mokkun, it is you! I'm so glad you're alive." He kept his full trusting eyes on me as I began to destroy the demon. They were the eyes I would never forget, and I would happily spend eternity making sure that I never betrayed the trust he had in me as I had to Seime.
My eyes flashed open as the dream ended. My head throbbed painfully as the images faded into nothing. "What…was that?" A picture formed in my mind of what appeared to be Masahiro but much younger, his eyes weren't filled with hidden pain, but instead with a baffling degree of trust and complete honesty. It was an expression I had never seen on the boy, but in the bottom of my heart, I felt the draw to see it in reality.
It was 2 month's after I had entered the spirit world that I felt Seime's call to me. I flickered into existence in the human world to find him sitting at a table preparing to do the soul projection spell.
"A mass number of demons have appeared due to an open portal," Seime informed me, "They are reeking havoc on the city. Masahiro and the others are already in battle, but they need help." He waved his hand for me to leave ahead of him and I did so with a bow.
I would never admit it but I almost felt anxious to see the boy again. He had been in my dreams many times since I entered the spirit world but the dreams themselves I could never recall. It didn't take much to find him, Rikugo, Tai'in and Kouchin fighting a group of demons. The Shikigami formed a protective ring around him while he performed mass spells. However, it seemed that as quickly as Masahiro decimated the demons more would appear. I leapt down and unleashed a wall of hellfire on the group.
"Come on Seime's grandson," I chided, "you should be able to do better than this!"
"DON'T CALL ME GRAN…" his voice faded off and I turned to gaze at him with an amused smirk that faded as I caught his expression. The look on his face was indescribable; he seemed to be attempting to figure out if something had actually been real. The sudden roar of a flaming demon that launched itself at him had him out of whatever he had been thinking about and back into battle.
It took nearly an hour to rid the city of the mass demons and reclose the portal. In that time I had to admit my opinion on the boy wavered. He went from being the barely competent trainee he was at the dorms to a full-fledged onmyouji with experience and skill. He seemed completely at ease with the sudden proximity of danger. It impressed me, but after my initial arrival he had refused to look at me or acknowledge me in any way. After the battle was done, instead of returning home he simply waved off the other Shikigami and began walking out of town. I transformed into my Mononoke form before darting to perch on Kouchin's shoulder as she followed the boy.
"Ko, where's he going?" I asked as I wrapped my tail around the back of her neck for balance.
"To visit Takao would be my guess. She favors him after he freed her from the demons a few years ago, he visits her rather often." She gave a simple shrug. "Touda… why did you call Masahiro that?" she asked after a few moments
"Call him what?" I tipped my head to look quizzically at her.
She held my gaze for a moment before shaking her head, "Never mind." Her attention suddenly swayed as Masahiro was tackled to the ground by a mound of minor demons. I nearly jumped from my spot on Ko's shoulder to rush to protect him but Ko held me there.
"Would you stop doing that!" Massahiro called in indignation.
"Thank you Seime's grandson, thank you for getting rid of all those frightening demons!" they cheered from their place on top of him, ignoring his protests.
"Don't call me that!" he let them all topple to the ground as he stood up. He brushed the loose dirt from his clothes before turning back to them. "Keep your eyes open and let me know if anything else is going on alright?"
"Of course Seime's grandson!" was the simultaneous answer.
Masahiro turned, waving a hand in farewell with a final "Stop calling me grandson."
"He's friends with the minor demons?" I asked Ko in a low voice.
"You could say that." She answered in a chuckle, "He saved them from a foreign demon some time ago and since then they always come to him for help. It works out well for Masahiro because they alert him to danger in any part of the city." She finished. It seemed so strange that I had never known any of this. I spent almost every hour of his day with him and I had never seen this side.
"This is your first time traveling with him at night isn't it Touda?" Ko asked, her voice curious.
"Yes… He's much…different." I confirmed.
"Yes, he keeps his potential hidden during the day so that unneeded questions won't be asked. However at night he does not need to fear that and thus can be himself." She gave a knowing smile to the calm boy that walked the streets with some authority. He seemed much more the deserving person who received special treatment of the 12 sacred Shikigami. I found myself being drawn toward him. The story Tenku had told me seemed less impossible with this Masahiro.
"Ko… Toku told me a story about Masahiro and I was wondering… Is the friend that doesn't remember him still around?" Kouchin stopped walking at my question and her eyes widened visibly as she turned to look at me. I once again tilted my head in question as she seemed to search my gaze for something, something she apparently didn't find.
Her shoulders suddenly released their tension as she began walking again. "I guess you could say that they are still around, but in a way they are not. The person Masahiro learned to trust no longer exists because it was a trust that was built on the memories they shared together, memories the other no longer has. Also, Masahiro drastically changed the person's heart, without the memories of Masahiro, he is not the person he became because of Masahiro's influence." She seemed to be doing more thinking out loud than actually answering my question. Suddenly she leapt to perch high in the branches and I looked down to find we had arrived at the shrine of the dragon god without me having noticed.
Masahiro confidently stepped up to the shrine and bowed. A light burst from the stone structure and a woman appeared sitting on top of it. "Hello again little boy." She greeted with a smile.
"Goddess Takao." Masahiro bowed again before sitting on a stair. The position appeared practiced, as if he had sat just like that many times.
"It seems there is much on your mind tonight young one. You may speak freely." She prompted, but Masahiro simply shook his head.
"Kouchin, if you're going to be here you might as well join us." Masahiro said as he closed his eyes and relaxed further.
Ko sighed theatrically before dropping from the tree.
"Ah, I see Touda is with you today. It has been some time since I have had the pleasure of your company." I watched as Masahiro's eyes flicked open at her words and found me on my perch.
"Touda" he nodded his head in a greeting. Something about the way the name slipped out of his mouth seemed so wrong.
"Why is it you always come here?" Kouchin asked as she lounged against a tree, obviously this type of visit was something she too was accustomed to, "Its not like her company is very good." She glared pointedly at the goddess.
"My my, aren't we rude today." Takao laughed as she floated down to sit next to the still form of Masahiro. His eyes had once again drifted closed.
"I suppose it's because it helps me clear my head. I have a lot of memories here and now that I no longer fear this place it's very calming." Masahiro mused in a low voice. Ko moved me into her lap and began absentmindedly petting me.
"Hey! Don't treat me like a pet!" I protested, leaping from her lap.
"Still as loud as ever I see." Takao chided, she reached down a hand and began playing with Masahiro's long hair as the boy's breathing evened. "Really, this boy needs to learn how to rest himself." She removed her hand from his hair.
"I don't think he's slept a full nights sleep in weeks." Ko agreed with her for once.
"In other words, since the last time he visited me. It is the only reason you allow him up here. Even if I have to use magic to accomplish it. Now Touda, it really has been some time, and you still take on the form of a Mononoke I see." Takao turned her attention from the sleeping boy to me.
"Goddess Takao, I believe this is the first time we have met, so I don't know what you mean."I settled myself onto a grassy spot, wrapping my tail around myself.
"Hmmm…I see." She seemed disappointed somehow by my response, "Very well then, you should take this young Onmyouji home he deserves the rest."
"Touda, would you carry him; there are some things I must discuss with the goddess." Kouchin questioned. I nodded, transforming. Once done I lifted Masahiro into my arms, shocked at how familiar that action seemed.
It didn't take long to get Masahiro back home and into his bed. The walk itself provided time for me to muse on why it had felt that this wasn't the first time I had done this. I sat leaned up against a wall, watching the boy sleep. Time seemed to fade until Ko placed a hand on my shoulder. I gave her a quick glance before turning back to my study of the boy.
"Ko, why do I only remember meeting him 3 years ago? He's sixteen, soon to be seventeen and yet I don't remember him at all."
Ko remained silent in answer before walking away, leaving my question without an answer. With a defeated sigh I transformed back to my Mononoke form and lay near the boy. I was startled nearly out of my fur as two arms snaked around me and drew me to his chest. I almost protested before seeing that the boy hadn't woken.
Unconsciously the boy snuggled his face into my fur, mumbling "Mokkun" in a low whisper. Why did that name seem so familiar? I didn't understand. I pulled myself from the boys grasp and padded out the door.
Rikugo sat outside acting as a guard it seemed.
"Rikugo, who is Mokkun?" I asked him.
He turned to stare at me for a moment before turning to look back toward the house I had just exited. "He is someone precious to Masahiro that he lost."
"Is it the person that no longer has any memories of him?" I pressed further.
"…Yes." With that he disappeared in a shimmering light. Partly satisfied I wandered back into the room. Once there I curled into a ball and fell asleep listening to his steady breathing.
Pain racked through my body as the demons tore into my flesh, but I paid it no mind as something more important was wrong. "Masahiro! Where are you?!" I screamed, frantically searching for the boy, only to find him about to be torn to pieces by Kyuuki. The exhausted boy raised his hands and began reciting a spell, "No Masahiro! You've got to stop using that spell!" I yelled. He had pushed past his limit some time ago and performing that spell could kill him. However he ignored my calls, falling unconscious as shook of the painful attack.
"Did you really think you could kill me with that? Pathetic!" his head descended, jaws wide toward Masahiro. Frantic I charged forward and placed myself between them. Teeth tore into my right shoulder as the large demon tore away my flesh. An image of an even smaller Masahiro appeared in my mind. The time I had first dedicated myself to protecting him and other images as well, of my time as the mononoke Mokkun, riding on his shoulder, and the time he had first called me Gurren. I felt a smile pull at my lips despite the pain. And then suddenly the dream was gone.
"Touda!" I opened my eyes to see large brown eyes gazing down at me. Masahiro had a hand gently placed on my shoulder and was shaking it. "Grandfather wants to see you." He said, rising to his feet. He didn't look back at me as he left the room, heading no doubt for the Onmyou dorms. I blinked after him as my head cleared of the fog of sleep. My dream, as always, left me with a throbbing headache. I rubbed my paw over my face before rising from the floor and moving toward Seime's room.
"Ah, Gurren there you are. Come in." I nodded as Seime greeted me.
"You wanted to see me Seime?"
"Yes, I had a question. The others have mentioned that you have been asking about the one who has forgotten Masahiro, May I ask why?" he said, placing his brush on the table and turning to gaze at me.
"I don't know. Tenku told me the story while I was in the spirit realm and it interested me." I shrugged.
"I see… Gurren I must ask you not to ever mention it to Masahiro. He already lives with the pain of it everyday, it would be too much to ask to reopen those wounds."
"Then…Seime, will you tell me more about it?" I prompted, jumping up to sit on his desk.
"What would you like to know?" he dipped his brush in ink and began to set to work again.
"How long ago did this happen?" I asked, excited to finally get some answers but surprised at how anxious I was to get said answers.
"Nearly four years ago now."
"Why wasn't I summoned at this time? I don't recall you being in such a danger as Tenku described."
"You weren't called because I trusted Masahiro to complete the task on his own."
"But the others were called weren't they?" I protested.
"They were already here. They had already decided for themselves to protect Masahiro."
"The why not me!" I shouted, finally losing my patience.
Seime stopped to look up at me once again, "That's a question I cannot answer Gurren."
I let out a frustrated growl as I stood and leapt from the room. With an indignant huff I settled down onto the roof of Masahiro's room. Why did it seem like everyone was hiding some big secret from me. I let my mind wander to all the people that I knew that this mysterious person could be but as the list grew none of them seemed to fit I sighed in frustration as the sounds of talking approached the house.
"He called you grandson? But I thought that he hadn't called you that since before?" the voice I recognized as Akiko asked.
"He hasn't, that's why it surprised me so much." Masahiro sighed. I peeked over the edge of the roof to find them both seated on the step below me. Akiko was looking at him worriedly while Masahiro stared into the now dark sky.
"Do you think he's beginning to…"
"That's not possible." Masahiro cut her off in a defeated voice. "He doesn't remember me Akiko and he never will. It's the price I had to pay to come back."
Akiko gave him a sad smile but nodded. "I don't know how you do it."
"Its better than him being gone forever. Now atleast he is alive, that's what matters." He gave Akiko a final smile before pushing himself up, "now I have to go on my rounds for the night."
Akiko watched him leave until he disappeared into the night. "Princess Akiko, what is wrong?" the new voice I recognized as Seime's.
"Oh, Seime-sama. Its nothing, I just miss seeing them together. They used to be so inseparable." Seime nodded as he sat down
"I do too princess. But most of all I wish Masahiro didn't have to make that decision in the first place. He is so young to have lived through this." Seime sighed. "He would never admit he was struggling though. He strong and likes to do things on his own." A soft smile appeared on Seime's face before he stood again, "Goodnight princess." He said quietly before making his way to his rooms.
"It isn't polite to eavesdrop on people Touda." Seiryu suddenly appeared behind me.
"And what is it you're doing then?" I bit back.
"Seime knows that I'm following him. It is my duty since Rikugo is with the child." He answered with a glare.
"Seiryu, who is the person Masahiro sacrificed himself for?" I asked, hoping that thes man would answer me, even with his hate toward me.
He snorted darkly before bluntly stating, "You you worthless traitor." With that he once again disappeared.
I stared at the spot he had been standing long after he disappeared. Me?
It wasn't until several hours later that Masahiro returned to the residence. His eyes were drooped as he walked half dazed into his rooms. I sat on a table just inside his room as he came in. The boy yanked a ribbon from his hair as he collapsed onto his mat. He was instantly asleep without noticing my presence.
In my Mononoke form I leapt from my perch to examine the boy. Minor bruises and cuts were scattered along his arms and face. My protective flare roared to life as I felt the urge to burn whoever placed them there with my hell fire. I bit it down and examined the emotion. I was the one the boy had trusted most? I was the one that caused him almost constant pain. I am Mokkun? I am Mokkun… The phrase seemed so right as I let it roll around in my mind.
"Seiryu says that he told you." Ko leaned against the doorway watching us.
"I was the one?" I asked her. A sad look passed over her face as she nodded, "And the reason I wasn't called when everyone was in so much danger was because I was already there, and I was the one who betrayed him… I was the one who nearly killed him?" Ko once again nodded. "I'm…Mokkun?"
"Yes, you were Masahiro's guardian. You watched over him when he was a small child. You took on the form of a Mononoke and became his Shikigami. He gave you the name Mokkun, you are Mokkun." She fazed out of existence with a forlorn smmile.
A blinding pain burst through my head at the statement. Images flashed before my mind. Images of a small child that did the impossible, that smiled at me. The child who could no longer see me when his powers were sealed. Once again appearing before the 13 year old boy and him giving me a name. Fighting by the boys side as he became an onmyouji. Him calling my name for the first time. And finally, betraying him just as I had Seime.
MPOV
Some sound in my room awoke me soon after I fell asleep, I blinked, attempting to bring the world into focus. There sitting near me, staring at the empty doorway was Mo…no Touda.
"Touda? What is it?" I sat up, whipping the sleep from my eyes. It was rare for him to be in my room at night.
He visibly flinched before turning to gaze at me. A pain was layered in his eyes, one I had only seen once before. I had to bite down the instinct to pick him up like I had at that time to get him to tell me the truth. It wasn't the same as it was back then. "Is something wrong?" I pressed again.
"I… I remember." Was all he said.
"Touda? What do you mean, remember what?" my mind flickered to a single answer but I pushed it away, refusing to let myself even start to hope.
"Everything, I remember everything." He restated, "I remember you."
TBC