New Perspectives

Part 1/2

Disclaimer: Jane Rizzoli and Maura Isles do not belong to me. No infringement intended and no profit will be made from their use.

One evening after yet another family dinner at Maura's house, Angela asked Jane to come over to the guest house to help her with something. Jane dutifully followed her mother, but once there, Angela said, "Jane I just wanted to ask you something in private. Do you like Maura?"

"Of course I like Maura, she's my best friend. What kind of question is that?"

"I mean do you like, like her?" Angela clarified.

"Oh my god, is this middle school or something? What the hell, Ma? Why does everyone keep thinking that Maura and I are a couple or that I like her like that. I'm not a lesbian. Maura's not a lesbian."

"Okay, calm down, Janie. I'm not trying to accuse you of anything. It's just since I've been living here I've seen you and Maura together a lot. I've seen how you are when you're around her. You're happy."

Jane shrugged her shoulders. "Well, yeah, I'm happy because I enjoy spending time with her. That's why we're friends. Why does it have to be anything more than that?"

"Okay, I just want you to know I wouldn't have a problem with it. You could do a lot worse than Maura, you know? And I don't think she would be opposed to the idea," Angela added.

"What does that mean?" Jane asked.

"Maura is very open-minded about sex and sexuality. She's had many different sexual experiences."

"I do not want to know how you know that," Jane said shaking her head.

"And it wouldn't hurt you to be more like her in that way," Angela concluded.

"Ma!"

"I just want you to be happy."

"I know, Ma. I know."

A few days later Maura was at Jane's apartment. Jane was sitting at her kitchen counter, watching Maura take out dishes and serve food from the take-out boxes she had brought to Jane's.

Maura put a plate of food in front of Jane and then sat down on the opposite side of the counter with her own food. "Jane, you're doing it again," she said.

"What?" Jane asked.

"Staring at me."

"No I'm not," Jane protested.

"Yes you are. You've been doing it all week. Would you care to tell me why?"

No, Jane did not care to tell Maura why. She had no intention of telling Maura that ever since her mother had brought up the idea of the two of them being in a relationship, Jane couldn't stop thinking it. The thing is, Jane had really never thought about Maura in a romantic or sexual way until Angela brought it up. And then it was all she could think about. She couldn't stop thinking about it, no matter how hard she tried not to think about it.

Jane was noticing things she never noticed before. Obviously she had always known Maura was a beautiful woman, but now she was noticing things like how Maura's eyes sparkled when she was excited about something. And she was noticing Maura's dimples when she smiled and thinking things like how adorable those dimples were. Maura caught Jane staring at her when Jane was deep in thought about how it would feel to run her fingers through Maura's perfect, shiny, bouncy, perfect hair.

But when Maura caught her Jane denied, denied, denied. What could she say? Yes I was staring at you because recently I've been thinking about taking you into my bedroom and going to town on you. What do you think about that? No, that was definitely not happening, so Jane just had to keep her mouth shut and figure out how to stop thinking things like that. It was going to fade eventually, right?

But Jane did have some questions. She was a detective after all, and she couldn't just let some things go by. "Have you been talking with Ma about sex related stuff?"

"Sure, we've had a few conversations. Why?"

"She just mentioned something about it. It just seems kinda weird."

Maura smiled. "Many adults are perfectly comfortable talking about sex. She obviously can't talk about it with you. You act like little kid worried about cooties when the topic of sex comes up," Maura teased.

"What? No I don't!"

"Yes you do. And your mother is surprisingly open-minded for a woman of her age and strict Italian Catholic upbringing. You know, we should really try to find her a male companion. It would be good for her."

Jane dropped her head into her hands. "Oh god. I can't think about that."

"See, cooties."

"You're talking about my mother."

Maura tilted her head in thought. "I suppose I can see how that could be weird to think about. So you see, it's a good thing she has me to talk to."

Jane couldn't stop herself. "She said you've had many different sexual experiences."

"Is that why you've been staring at me like that? Does it make you uncomfortable?"

"No, that's not... I have not been staring at you! It's not that I'm uncomfortable exactly, but you know, I'm your best friend. Maybe it's just weird that my mother knows this stuff about you that I don't."

"I'm not trying to hide anything from you. We never talk about past sexual experiences. I didn't think it was something you wanted to talk about."

"I don't exactly..." Jane trailed off.

"But now you're curious because you're a detective and this is what you do," Maura finished for her.

"Exactly."

"Starting when I was in college and throughout most of my twenties, I had a lot of sexual experiences. It was a way I could connect with people and you know that isn't exactly a strength of mine. Sex is something I was-I am-very good at, and it was a way to interact with other people where I wasn't the awkward one, or the only awkward one depending on the situation."

Jane shrugged. "So you had sex with a lot of people?"

"Well, yes, but it was more than that. There are all kinds of kinks and communities built around them, if you know where to look. If you've heard of it, I probably tried it."

Jane could feel herself starting to blush. "Oh."

"It wasn't just having a lot of sex. I learned a lot about myself and what I like and what I'm looking for in another person. After a while, I realized I really wasn't emotionally engaging with anyone during these... activities. Many people do, but I wasn't. I decided I needed to try to learn how to engage with people on a more emotional level too in order to have the type of long-term relationship I want." Maura shrugged. "I guess I'm still working on that."

"You told Ma all of this?" Jane asked.

"More or less. I'm sorry if I crossed a boundary I shouldn't have."

"No, no, it's fine. You're right anyway. Ma deserves someone to talk to. It probably better for it to be someone other than me."

After a few minutes of eating silently, Maura said, "Is there something else you want to ask me?"

Jane cleared her throat and laughed lightly. "Um, maybe, but I'm not going to ask it."

"What? Why not?"

"Because it's, it's just, I'm just not gonna ask you."

A few days later, Angela was serving breakfast to Maura in the headquarters cafe. Finding Maura alone, Angela took the seat across from her and said, "Can I ask you something?"

"Of course."

"Are you interested in Jane?" Angela asked.

"I'm sorry," Maura answered. "I'm not very good with colloquialisms, so you should probably be more specific about what you are asking me."

"Are you romantically interested in Jane?" Angela clarified.

Maura blushed and she sputtered, "I, I..."

Angela took hold of Maura's hand and said, "Honey, it's okay if you are and I won't tell her. I know I shouldn't meddle but I see you two together all the time now. It just makes me wonder. And I can't help but think that you would make each other happy."

Maura had a realization and she asked, "Did you say something to Jane?"

"I asked her essentially the same question but she didn't really answer me," Angela answered as vaguely as possible. "Did she say something to you?"

"No, but she's been acting kind of strange the past few days. I keep catching her staring at me."

"Listen, you don't have to tell me anything. But let me just say, if you are interested, I think you have a chance."

"Do you really think so?"

Angela nodded. "I've seen the way Jane looks at you, and how she acts around you."

"But Jane doesn't date women."

"There's a first time for everything, right?"

Angela left and Maura just sat where she was, slightly in shock. Was it possible that Jane was actually romantically interested in her? Was that why Jane had been acting so weird recently?

Maura could easily see herself being with Jane when she thought about it. Jane was gorgeous and smart, and most importantly Maura had made an emotional connection with Jane in a way she never had with another person before. But Jane was straight. Maura had never allowed herself to think about Jane as anything other than a friend. Her best friend. But what if Angela was right?

A few days later Jane and Maura were sitting on Maura's couch watching the Bruins game. Jane was chancing occasional glances at Maura, who was being oddly quiet. Usually Maura put up with Jane's interest in watching televised sporting events on the unspoken condition that she was allowed to ramble on about whatever she wanted to without Jane complaining.

"What's going on with you tonight?" Jane finally asked.

Maura had been staring at the television without really watching. "What do you mean?" She said.

"You are being really, really quiet tonight and you seem a little distracted."

"I've dated women," Maura blurted out.

"O...kay," Jane said slowly.

Maura finally looked at Jane and said, "Isn't that what you wanted to ask me a few days ago?"

"Oh. Uh, maybe," Jane answered, blushing.

"Jane, I wasn't trying to hide it from you, it just never really came up before. I never had a reason to tell you."

"You know that doesn't bother me or anything, right?" Jane asked.

"Good. I mean, I didn't think it would, but it's good to know that it doesn't."

"You haven't dated any women since I've known you, as far as I know anyway, so was it like a phase?" Jane asked.

"A phase?"

"Like you tried it but it turns out it dating women isn't your thing?"

"No, it wasn't a phase," Maura replied.

"So...then what is it?"

"I think I'm probably equally attracted to men and women, but for whatever reason I've only dated men recently." Maura turned, crossing her legs in front of her, so she was completely facing Jane. Jane copied Maura's position so they were facing each other. "You know you can talk to me openly about anything or ask me anything. You never have to be embarrassed about anything with me," Maura said.

"Yeah, I know, but that doesn't prevent me from actually feeling embarrassed."

Maura thought hard about what she wanted to say next. She could feel that they were on the verge of something and she didn't want to mess it up. "Just tell me exactly what you're thinking right now."

"I think I want to kiss you," Jane blurted.

"Oh, that's...I didn't expect that," Maura said because it was true. She didn't expect Jane to be so direct.

"Uh, shit, I'm sorry, I'm so stupid. You don't think of me that way. That's totally fine."

Jane turned away but Maura grabbed her arm. "Jane, I didn't say I didn't want to kiss you too."

Jane looked back at Maura confused. "Oh. Wait, what?"

Maura grabbed the front of Jane's shirt and pulled her forward and then pressed her lips to Jane's.