Author's Note: Disclaimer I own none of the AF, Black Butler (or Kuroshitsuji), or LOTR characters and worlds that appear in this fanfic. They belong to their authors, respectively, Eoin Colfer, Yana Toboso, and J.R.R. Tolkien.
Please note that this story will be confusing, mind-blowing, and incredibly crazy (all due to a certain Shinigami, but let's not go there). If you feel uncomfortable with any of the references or characters at any time, feel free to stop reading.
Well, welcome to the crazy mind of DragonNerdGirl. We advise that you strap yourselves in tightly, keep your hands and feet inside the car, and do not stand while reading. We also advise that if you need to take a break to understand what the heck you just read that you do so. Thank you and enjoy the ride!
Chapter One: A Black-Haired Boy and His Devoted Bodyguard
Artemis Fowl the Second stood up from his desk and walked over to the bookcase of his study. He fingered several large ones and then took out a thin hardback. His favorite book since he was little. He skimmed through its well-worn pages fondly, remembering when his father read to him from it. The youth wondered briefly if it would be a good time to start reading this story to his little brothers. He decided against it. Myles already knew about the fairies since his possession by the fairy warrior spirits, but this story might give him a desire to catch one. And Artemis did not want to deal with the LEP for any other reason than correspondence between Holly, Foaly, and himself.
He slowly replaced the book on the shelf and returned to his desk. He was just about to finish the new program he had been concentrating on for the past week, when the ring on his middle finger vibrated. It must be Holly.
Artemis twisted the ring so the ostentatious setting sat inside his hand, and held the device up to his ear.
"Holly, that you?"
He could almost hear the elf's eyes roll. "No, Artemis. This is the FBI. Of course, it's me. Who else would be calling you on your communicator?"
"All right, all right. I was merely asking. You never know if your communicator could be stolen," he retorted, smiling.
"You have that smug grin on, don't you, Mud Boy?" Holly grimaced. She knew he was joking with her. It had become something of a habit since his resurrection.
"Stop it, Holly. If you're going to keep bickering like that, just give me the communicator!" On the other end, Foaly held out a hand impatiently. Holly sighed.
"Fine, Foaly. You tell him," she replied, handing him the device. The centaur quickly took over.
"Artemis, have you heard of any massive tremors or bright lights in Ireland recently?" The centaur sounded as if he was all business.
The youth thought for a moment. "I think I remember hearing about something happening somewhere in Galway last night. Though the report wasn't very specific as to where exactly it happened or what happened. There were tremors felt a few weeks ago near Portumna. Why do you ask?"
"Because we've been detecting strange amounts of activity around the Dublin area. We've also been picking up some kind of energy. But some of this energy doesn't seem... well... natural." Foaly sounded rather in shock.
"What do you mean by not natural?" Artemis furrowed his brow in confusion. This didn't sound good.
"Honestly, we're not even sure it's energy. If it is, it's unlike anything we've ever seen. I remember reading of a strange energy that was produced by some sort of radiation. It cleared up after a few days and left no permanent effects, but this energy produces radiation. And it's constantly moving about in the same area every day. We sent a team in to check it out, but they never came back." The centaur paused. Artemis could guess what he wanted.
"So you would like Butler and me to check out this energy source?" he asked, knowing the answer.
Holly piped up. "You, Butler, and myself. I'm definitely not letting you get all the credit for finding this thing. Plus, Trouble wants me to find out what happened to the team we sent before."
Artemis smiled and nodded. "I guess I'll go tell Butler then. He'll be glad of something to do. The twins have been wearing him down lately. Father can't wrestle with them as much as he used to, so Butler's been playing with them."
"Good, it'll be nice to see the big man again. How are the twins anyway? It took quite a bit of convincing to keep the Council from mind-wiping them." Holly remembered the time she had met Myles. He had been very much like his older brother.
"As active as ever. Beckett is really something else. I have no idea how that boy can run around the manor for four hours straight and then go to football practice with energy to spare. Myles is a little more subtle, thank heavens. I'd hate to have to deal with an overly-active, child genius. Juliet keeps them out of trouble most of the time though," Artemis sighed ruefully. There were sometimes he wished he could run around the backyard with the twins and play with them like a big brother should. And then there were times he wished they would just calm down and act like he had at their age, albeit the criminal ventures.
Foaly cut in again. "All right, we'll send Holly up in about an hour to get you guys. Would you mind testing out some new equipment for me, Arty?"
The boy shook his head, rolling his eyes. "Of course, Foaly. If you stop calling me Arty. That name is reserved for only three people in this world, and you're not one of them."
"And who would those three be?" the centaur couldn't resist asking.
Artemis changed the subject. A little too quickly. "What do you want me to test out?"
"You'll see when Holly picks you and Butler up," Foaly replied, choosing to forego a comment about the quick subject change.
"Very well then. I'll get Butler. See you in an hour, Holly," Artemis replied, checking his wristwatch.
"See you, Artemis," Holly replied and severed the connection. The boy twisted the ring back to its regular position and picked up his leather jacket. It was mid-September, and the temperatures had been dropping curiously fast since last week. Artemis now wondered if it had anything to do with this mysterious energy.
He found Butler in the old barn that housed the plane that Artemis and Holly had flown with a little push from a troll during Opal's siege of Fowl Manor. Well, the remains of it. Artemis Senior had decided to recycle the old parts and try to build something new with it. The only problem was the parts were too badly damaged to use for anything so they sat gathering dust in the barn. Butler still used the place for a makeshift gym when he wanted to get away from the twins. Even the bodyguard needed some peace and quiet.
Artemis smiled as he approached the barn door, hearing a loud smack of a punching bag as it slammed against the one wall. Since he had come back from the dead, Artemis had decided that perhaps it was time he exercised more seriously. And take it seriously he had. Beckett didn't think much of it, but Myles was getting jealous of Artemis's new muscles.
Butler had just punched another bag across the barn when Artemis opened the door. The manservant looked up at his charge.
"Artemis, what is?"
"I just wanted to let you know that Holly will be picking us up in a little less than an hour. There's some sort of radiation-producing energy that we need to check out, which I very highly doubt is actually energy considering it's defying all laws of nature. Anyways, she'll be coming along to search for a missing LEP team that was sent to investigate it earlier," the boy replied.
"So will I be needed to scare whoever's making this weird energy?" Artemis grimaced. Butler was not in a good mood.
"If best comes to best, then yes, old friend. If worst comes to worst... well, I'd prefer not to think about that." The juvenile genius, as Artemis preferred to be called these days, turned his back on his bodyguard and exited the barn. He heard another punching bag slam against the wall. Perhaps he should leave Butler here. It was obvious the bodyguard was upset about something.
The boy shrugged and returned to his room. He could ask Butler later about what was bothering him. Meanwhile, there were plans to be made.
End Notes: So there you have it. Please review!