Disclaimer: I don't own Inuyasha, nor am I profiting from writing this.
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Postscript
By Starzki
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You son of a bitch.
You went and died on me. Yeah, I know I was mostly responsible for killing you, but I never thought it would actually happen.
Bastard.
I expected more from you. I wanted more from you. Oh, hell, I needed more from you.
What am I supposed to do now?
Who am I if I'm not your enemy? I'm a nuisance to villagers. Something barely respected, yet hated and feared.
Misunderstood. That was me. How pathetic. I was the one who never belonged because no one ever took the time to try to find a place for me.
I take that back. Everyone was fine when my place was impaled by an arrow, stuck to a fucking tree.
I was the hanyou who the priestess pitied and let follow at her heels. A lovesick puppy searching for anything or anyplace that didn't drive him away with hard feet and sharp words. The puppy who could nip back with a vengeance, but wasn't a real demon, a whole demon. More an annoyance than anything, really.
Pathetic.
Then you came along. Then you fought me. Then you defined me.
I noticed that people still knew me as the hanyou, but I was then known as the hanyou who fought Naraku. Your power was respected because of the violence you spread. Because I fought you, I was respected. I was your opposite, the positive to your negative. Your opponent.
When we fought, I always survived. I would always go back for more.
I thought there would always be more.
Bastard.
Yeah, I'll be known as the hanyou that defeated Naraku for a little while.
Great.
But people's memories fade. I know they'll forget me eventually because you're not around to constantly remind people of what a fucking bastard you are.
Or they might not forget you and the terror you caused, but they'll forget me. They'll forget that I was fierce, that I was strong, that this win was not inevitable, but a battle that was hard-won.
The others don't understand. Shippou's happy: we'll stop traveling so much. Miroku's happy: no more wind tunnel. Sango's happy: vengeance is sweet. Kagome is happy: she thinks she loves me and that I can settle down and be happy, too.
The others don't understand, but I think that maybe you do.
Or would if I hadn't killed you. It was never about this battle being over. It was about fighting the battle. Without it, we are nothing.
Once again, I belong nowhere. I am again displaced.
So fuck you for that. You weren't supposed to die. Not until I was done getting strong.
So why don't you tell me what the hell I'm supposed to do now. The others are already making plans.
Kagome will go back to her time. I will not go with. Demons don't belong there. I may seem stupid, but every trip to her time drives home the point that I'm all wrong there. She won't stay here either. She'll go back to her school and her life and her trips back here will become fewer. It's what happens.
The monk and the taijiya will go off together and have thousands of fat babies.
Shippou will bother me for a while before finding a place of his own where he'll be happier.
I have nothing else. Everything I was and everything I had was because of you. And now you're gone and you take all of what was important to me with you to the grave.
In destroying you, I destroyed myself.
I am a fighter and now have no one left to fight. No one who counts, anyway.
I hate you now that you're dead more than I ever hated you. I hate you even more now than I did when you were hurting and killing those I loved.
I'll never be stronger than I am right now because you failed to keep up with my pace. I bested you, but I'll be the one who ultimately will suffer for it.
You disgust me and there's really only one other thing I have to say to you before we torch your ugly carcass.
You fucking disappoint me.
END.
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Author's Note: This story was heavily inspired by A Perfect Circle's "Passive" from which I stole the last line.
