Title: Goodbye
Rating: Pg-13-NC-17
Genre: Romance/Tragedy
Chara(s): OC x Miyavi one sided,Aoi x Shiro,Miyavi x Kai,
Summary:
"Sayonara, Aishiteru!"
Warning:
meantions of Yaoi, Cutting, blood, language o.o;;
Disclaimer:
I don't own Miyavi or the Gazette..if i did do you think i would be writing fanfics about them?!?! oh and credit goes to Trust Company- The War is Over for the lyrics n.n
[Chapter 1: Slipping Away]
The hours devour me
My life's wasted waiting here for you
There's nothing left of me
Lost in a void I don't see
There's nothing left to believe
The end is now
I surrender
The darkness crept around as a small figure sat huddled in between the marble bathtub and the porcelain toilet which was stained in a shimmering crimson liquid. Silent sobs echoed throughout the tiled room as the figure sat with their arms wrapped tightly around their legs which were pulled up to their chest. A small plop was heard as a crimson droplet fell to the floor adding to the already formed crimson puddle pooled out on the tiled white floor. Blue eyes blood shot from crying for the past forgotten hours looked up from the figure's arm. The figure cocked their head to the side listening trying to figure out how long they had been sitting in this small bathroom attached to the dimly lit apartment that the person lived in. Memories flashed through the small frail forms mind as a shutter could be felt down the shadowed body's spine.
[Memory]
He walked with grace down the cement pathway they called a sidewalk, his hair swayed back and forth at his every step at which flowed with such elegance and grace, no wonder they used to call him MIYABI, meaning Elegance, but she didn't seem very elegant walking behind him slowly, her black hood pulled up over her head that was attached to the black sweat jacket that was zipped up around her already skinny form. He turned smiling at her as he reached out taking her hand for a split second, and for that split second she felt safe and warm and even...dare she say it... loved... but that all ended when HE strode up, he being Uke Yutaka, the drummer of the GazettE. Such beauty he held, far more than she would ever have, she just let out a small sigh as she stuffed her hands in her pockets, when had she become so.. so... weak... and pathetic... since when had she fallen madly in love with this beauty of a man who called himself MIYAVI...
The war is over
The rain is falling
And all that's left has blown away
Your eyes are haunted
By what you wanted
I surrender (I surrender)
The war is over
The door to the apartment slowly slid open as a man about a little past 6 foot stepped inside, he had knocked several times before deciding that either she wasn't going to open up the door or she wasn't there. "Ano...Latanya-chan?" he questioned in his silky voice that most women had fallen in love with, only because he was famous of course. He sighed some when he didn't receive an answer, he flicked on a light, the apartment looked normal all except a lit cigarette sitting on the ashtray on the coffee table in front of the small couch positioned against the wall. Since when did she smoke, were the thoughts running through the raven haired soloist's mind before something caught his attention, a small light flickered on and off in the petite bathroom that was built into the small apartment that she lived in. He set his bag down on the table before going to investigate.
[Latanya's POV]
I heard walking as I pressed myself back against the cold tiled wall behind me, crimson liquid seeped from the deep gash I had put in my wrist hoping to end all this pain, hoping to tell me if I was really awake in this reality of illusions. I had called him a few hours ago to say Good Bye, he asked me why and I didn't answer, stupid move on my part because he said he would be right over.
'Moshi Moshi?'
'Sayonara, Aishiteru'
'Nani? Latanya?!?! What are you talking about, Good Bye? Latanya!?!?'
beep beep beep
'Shit!'
I reached down and slowly lifted the cool wood handle that was attached to an already crimson stained blade that shone in the dim light, I brought it down to my arm once more and pressed down hard breaking the skin on contact and then slowly slid it across my arm. I enjoyed the feel...the thrill of it all...my heart pumped wildly in my chest as I sucked in a sharp breath as the door handle to the bathroom I was in jiggled a bit, he was here already, I knew he didn't live that far away, but did he really care.
The anger I keep for you
The bitter lessons I will keep for me
There's nothing I can do
To save you from your own hell
There's nothing left for you
The end is now
I surrender
I quickly discarded the knife in its hiding place before I quickly pulled down my shirt and pulled down the black sleeve to my shirt hiding the already dried up blood on my arm. I glanced up as the door finally opened to reveal that raven haired soloist I had fallen in love with, he just stared at me in shock, but it wasn't really ME he was looking at he was looking at the blood on the floor and the toilet seat as well as the dried blood on the tub edge, I scoffed some to myself as I started to push myself up off the floor but to my dismay I received THAT look, the look that told me I was in major trouble.
The war is over
The rain is falling
And all that's left has blown away
Your eyes are haunted
By what you wanted
I surrender (I surrender)
The war is over (It's over now)
[Miyavi's POV]
I sighed some obviously disgusted at the blood that was pooled on her tiled bathroom floor, why had she done this again, was this to get back at me for what happened with Kai when he showed up when it was supposed to be just US that afternoon? I took in a small breath of air and stalked over to her form as I shot her already moving form a look, if she wasn't already half dead by now I wouldn't be surprised if I didn't kill her by nights end, I screamed in my head as I quickly helped her to stand, I chose my words carefully before finally opening my lips to speak, "Why?" I asked as I looked over her already pale form, she wore a long sleeved shirt that was obviously two sizes too big for her and slightly faded and ripped jeans, she looked pathetic to say the least.
She didn't answer me back but just looked to the ground as I felt her arm tear from my grip and I watched her head for the door, she was staggering somewhat, obviously she had been sitting there longer than I thought. "Latanya Serendipity Bluesummers...march your ass back here now!" I said but it had come out not the way I had wanted when I saw her cringe, poor thing, I thought but pushed that thought aside as I went after her retreating form.
I can see it; I can see what you've become
I can feel it, as everything goes numb
I just want to help her, but she probably didn't want it, even though she was going to get it anyway. I reached out grabbing her arm roughly and pulled her back into myself holding her there, "Latanya please... tell me why?" I begged though I didn't understand why I was begging in the first place, hell I wasn't the one who slit my wrists to get back at her best friend if that was the case. I held her tight as she struggled to get away, the blood on her arm was slimy and disgustingly wet underneath my grip as she tried to pull away once more but I held her tighter, she eventually stopped, going quiet before I could pick out painful and silent sobs and mumbles of I'm sorry in between those sobs. I sighed some as I pulled her back against me more, I knew what she wanted, I couldn't love her, not like she wanted me to, and because of that I knew she was dying on the inside. I've hated myself time and time again for causing her so much pain and sorrow.
The raven-haired woman in the soloists arms just sobbed until her heart just couldn't take it anymore, why, why was she so weak! were the thoughts running through her mind, this war that plagued her, this emotional war that left her with nothing except to surrender into its will and then slowly let it eat her from the inside out destroying everything she had worked for in life to achieve within the years she had been. He couldn't love her, she refused to love him anymore than just a friend but it was evident in her haunting Ice Blue eyes what she desired, his love, his heart, and hell she desired HIM in general… but he belonged to that man by the name of Uke Yutaka, she couldn't ever compete with the drummer from the GazettE.
The war is over
The rain is falling
And all that's left has blown away
Your eyes are haunted
By what you wanted
I surrender (I surrender)
The war is over
Miyavi sighed as he slowly brought the distraught girl to the couch and sat her down, he had to do something about those wounds or else she would surely die, and he couldn't have that, he would NOT lose his best friend because of some stupid and petty emotional breakdown.
"Latanya... Snap out of it... can you hear me?" he questioned as he looked up at her tear stained face, her cheeks were raw, a light red indicating she had stopped crying for now, but tear trails were still evident on her cheeks as an occasional sniffle could be heard as they now sat in silence with the raven haired soloist cleaning and wrapping the two connecting deep wounds in the distraught girl's arm that sat in front of him on the couch silently.
It's over now
I can see it, I can see what you've become
I can feel it, as everything goes numb
He felt so numb right now, he knew he could fix all this with Three Simple Words, but he knew they would be a lie and she would know on the spot if he lied. He looked up at her and slowly reached up running a hand across her raw and reddened cheek, her eyes were puffy and swollen from so much crying, he hated seeing her like this, it tore at his heart.
She watched his eyes before some more tears freely spilled down her cheeks, "I'm sorry... I'm so sorry..." she mumbled as she dropped her head. The soloist shook his head causing his raven locks that were placed up in a ponytail to shake some with his head movements, "Please don't apologize... I just want a promise, a simple promise that you won't EVER do this again..." he said running two fingers over the bandages that were wrapped around her wrist where the deep wounds were.
The war is over
The rain is falling
And all that's left has blown away
Your eyes are haunted
By what you wanted
I surrender (I surrender)
The war is over
A small smile formed on her lips as she smiled down at him some now, "...I...I swear I won't EVER...EVER do it again.." she choked out between silent sobs now, her voice cracked from so much crying as her throat was sore. The soloist smiled and slowly stood up, "Come on, let's get you to bed." he said as he helped her stand, she leaned against him, It was over now, this whole night of Hell was over, she wasn't gone and he was glad for that, the wounds weren't deep enough to kill her and he knew from right then and there she had hesitated, if she had truly wanted to disappear as she had told him, she wouldn't have hesitated.
The raven-haired soloist helped the girl into the bed slowly leaning down and moving some thin hair that was sticking to her forehead away and kissed her forehead lovingly and kindly, "Latanya... I may not be able to love you back... but I will always be there for you.." he said as he slowly left her side letting the girl fall finally into a peaceful sleep with a smile on her face.