Dreaming

"We've got no place to go, caught up in a rodeo. Oh no, please, god, tell me we're dreaming."

Hiruzen loved his job. He loved being able to help people, and lend others his strength. He loved the way the kids would look at him when he walked by, and the trust that his village put in him. From the day he had been born, all he had wanted was to be able to treat the world as his family, and, truly, he seemed to have gotten his wish.

Of course, it wasn't all that simple. The title of Hokage came with a lot of responsibility, but he thought he handled it well most of the time. The villagers seemed to think so too whenever he had the chance to talk to them. But occasionally, there were these days where the world would decide to test him. Then he would think about his old teacher Tobirama, and wonder if the old man had made the right decision so many years ago when he had chosen Hiruzen over Danzo. Times like these would make his heart ache for someone else to take up the hat and rid him of the ugly parts of the shinobi world. But of course, that was selfish. His time wasn't up quite yet. He could only do his best.

Today was one of those days.

"Slow down, and take a breath," he told the young man standing in front of him. He had never seen the Gisao Shiranui so worked up, but he supposed that the man had never lost anyone in the field before either.

"I-I'm sorry Hokage-sama," the Chunin closed his eyes.

"It's okay to grieve when you lose someone," Hiruzen said quietly. "Are you okay to continue?"

"Yes, I think so."

"Good, then tell me what happened."

"We were escorting the caravan towards Amegakure, just like the mission instructed," he began. "When we were ambushed overnight. At first we thought that it was just bandits- that's the only threat that our client had warned us about. A-and they were dressed like bandits too. Kojirama-senpai wasn't concerned, and had us split up under the order to protect the caravan. It was supposed to be simple."

Gisao stopped to close his eyes for a moment, and Hiruzen's hokage hat felt even heavier on his head. He knew where this was going. There was a reason Kojirama wasn't the one briefing him, even though he had been the appointed leader for the mission.

"Go on," he prompted.

"They were ninja, disguised as local bandits. They outnumbered us two to one- we never even really stood a chance," Gisao said quietly. "Kojirama-senpai took on half of them at once, while Ryou, Satori, and I fought off three others. The last one sacked the caravan, but I don't think he actually stole anything. They seemed to be under orders to destroy and execute. I didn't see exactly what happened, but there was a lot of fire- and the merchants were trapped inside. I wanted to try and help them, but then Ryou took a kunai to the gut, and Satori got caught in a genjutsu and started screaming. One of the enemy nin was about to get me too, but then Kojirama dropped out of nowhere. He told me that he had the situation handled, and that it was of utmost importance that I make it back here to tell you what had happened. He said that was an order. S-so I started to run."

"Hm, and you think that there's no chance that there were any survivors?" Hiruzen contemplated.

"I was about a quarter mile away when there was an explosion," Gisao shook his head. "I couldn't keep going after that, so I turned around, but when I got back, the entire clearing was barren. T-there were bodies too. B-but I-I couldn't tell who was who. They were all so charred." He reached into his pocketwith a shaky hand and pulled out a body scroll, laying it before Hiruzen. Gently, the Hokage unrolled it and counted the seals.

"Sixteen," he said aloud.

"Yeah," Gisao muttered, his eyes falling to the floor.

"You did well," Hiruzen nodded, rolling the scroll back up. "We might be able to identify the enemy nin with this as well, and find out which village is behind the attack. Your team won't have died in vain."

Gisao nodded absently, and Hiruzen knew that for the moment the man was lost to the world. He needed some time.

"I'm upgrading this to an A-rank mission, and giving you a while off," Hiruzen continued. "Go back to your wife and son. I'm sure they'll be happy to have you around for a little bit."

Gisao nodded before making a slow exit. It would be a while before the young man would be able to recover from that sort of mission, and he most certainly would never forget it. Hiruzen looked down at his desk and the files on top.

Unfortunately, he'd probably be able to say the same about himself. He knew all of the men on Gisao's team who had died in combat, but Kojirama specifically wasn't just anybody in the village. He was an elite jonin, head of the Senju clan, and the only living decedent of the second Hokage. People had looked up to him, and in many ways Hiruzen had felt personally responsible for his well being. It was only right that he try and look after the family his old sensei had left behind. Tobirama had sacrificed everything that day for him.

There was also his own student to think about. Tsunade was going to take this hard. She didn't have many relatives left, and those she did have seemed to be dropping like flies in recent years. He would have to go find her, and Kojirama's wife. He wanted to tell them in person.

Standing up, he laid his Hokage hat and cloak on his chair, venturing out into the world in his shinobi gear. Fifteen minutes later he was stepping into the Hospital, being greeted by a startled nurse sitting at the front desk.

"Hokage-sama!" she greeted him. "We weren't expecting you today."

"Hm, you wouldn't be. Where is Tsunade-hime? I need to speak with her," he said.

"I'll go get her for you," the nurse said quickly as she hopped to her feet and scuttled around the corner. Hiruzen waited patiently for her to return, glancing around the lobby. The hospital wasn't actually that busy today,thankfully. There seemed to be a few civilians in for different reasons, but looking at the log on the front desk, most of the shinobi currently present were just in for routine visits.

That made sense though. This had been a relatively calm year for Konoha, even with the brewing hints of hostility coming from the borders. Even ninja villages, occasionally, could appreciate brief moments of peace.

Then again, thinking of Kojirama, maybe the only reason that the hospital wasn't dealing with any trauma patients was because his shinobi weren't making it back from their missions at all. Hiruzen didn't like that reasoning half as much.

"This better be urgent," a familiar voice floated in from around the corner. "I'm busy with research today, and don't have time for personal calls."

"We all have busy schedules. Don't you have any respect for the Hokage?" Hiruzen raised an eyebrow with a smirk.

"I have plenty of respect for the Hokage, just none for my sensei," Tsunade shot back. That would've made him laugh, had he actually been stopping by just for a friendly visit. Tsunade seemed to be in a good mood today. She usually would be more aggressive otherwise.

"Hmph," he breathed. "Well at least you have some regard for my hat." Tsunade rolled her eyes at him, just as he took note that the nurse at the desk seemed to be smirking at their banter. "Come on, your research can wait a bit. Let's take a walk." The hospital room was too open for this sort of talk.

Tsunade was no fool though. The minute the sentence was out of his mouth, she knew something was wrong. Hiruzen always did like taking walks with his students, but usually he wouldn't seek them out explicitly to just chat. Hokage's just didn't have time for that sort of nonsense.

"Alright, I'm sure they'll find someone to take over for me for just a little bit," Tsunade nodded wearily. The pair exited the hospital lobby and started to meander out along the road, towards the outskirts of the village where they'd have a bit more privacy. Hiruzen made errant conversation about Tsunade's hospital work along the way, and she humored him, talking about the way Hashirama tree leaves seemed to react to certain veins of poison for just a bit.

When they crossed the bridge though, she cut straight to the point.

"Alright, I know you don't really care about my anti-venom treatments, as long as they work," she said, crossing her arms and giving him a bristly look. "What's this really about? Who died?"

Hiruzen frowned, knowing that she was mostly joking, but spitting out the elephant in the air anyways.

"Kojirama did," he said with a sigh. Tsunade's eyebrows went up in a brief moment of shock as she stopped walking.

"My cousin Kojirama?" she blinked. It was hitting her slowly, but she'd process it in a moment. Tsunade usually dealt with these things rather well. Lord knows Hiruzen had delivered this sort of news to her more than once before. There were only three Senju's left in the world now, and there was a reason for it.

"Hm, that's the one," Hiruzen nodded. "He was ambushed by enemy nin while on a body guard mission. He took out all eight of them, but didn't manage to get away himself."

"I guess that makes me clan head now," Tsunade mumbled, as her shoulders sagged a bit. "Nawaki is going to be devastated. So will Mura. She's pregnant you know, the baby is supposed to be coming any day."

"I know, she's been visiting Biwako frequently the last few weeks. She's always talking about how Asuma and her baby will be great friends. I want to tell her about this in person. Kojirama meant a lot to this village. His sacrifice saved Gisao Shirinai's life. His wife shouldn't hear about this from a messenger," Hiruzen said solemnly. Tsunade nodded, eyes distant and sad.

"I'll come with you," she said.

They turned and started heading towards the shinobi housing district. Kojirama's house was right next to Tsunade's, right in the heart of the city. The two houses were no grand clan complex, like what the Hyuga's and the Uchiha's had, but it was the only Senju quarters left in the village. Hiruzen was glad that Hashirama and Tobirama had never decided to build anything large or isolated like the other clans had. It would've made Tsunade and little Nawaki feel lonely.

When they arrived, Hiruzen took the lead and knocked gently on the door. A few seconds later, a short heavily pregnant woman with dark brown hair answered the door.

Hiruzen could see what Tsunade meant when she said that Mura was just about ready to pop. She was such a small woman to begin with that her stomach seemed to be nearly twice the size of the rest of her. When she saw the two ninja standing on her doorstep, she blinked.

"Oh, hi Tsunade, Hokage-sama," she said. "What can I do for you?"

"I was wondering if we could come in," Hiruzen asked gently.

"Of course," she nodded glancing over her shoulder. "You'll have to excuse the mess though. I'm not allowed to strain myself, doctors orders, so the clutter's just been gathering for a few days." She smiled at Hiruzen, as she led her two guests into the living room. "I'm sure you understand that though. If I remember right, Biwako's pregnancy went about as well as mine is."

"I don't think it was quite that bad. She had little Isamu waiting on her the entire time. You should've heard him complain," Hiruzen smiled. Mura smiled back as a hand went subconsciously to her belly.

"I hope maybe my baby will be as good as your son Hokage-sama. Asuma should be glad to have such a well-behaved older brother," she said. Tsunade cleared her throat then, and gave pointed Hiruzen a look.

"Mura-, do you want to sit down? I could get you a glass of water," she offered.

"Oh no Tsunade, I'm fine," Mura waved at her, though she did take a seat. "You can wait on me when I'm in your house, not here."

"Hm, I suppose it shouldn't wait any longer then," Hiruzen said. "Mura, I'm afraid I have some bad news."

"Oh. Is Kojirama going to be late getting back?" she blinked confused.

"Mura-nee," Tsunade said gently. Her expression was twisted with shared grief and pity. This part was worse for her than hearing the news herself. "Kojirama didn't make it back from his last mission."

"He died protecting his companions, taking out every single one of the enemy nin that were attacking them. It was an honorable death, even if it was terribly too soon" Hiruzen added, hoping that maybe that knowledge would bring her some comfort.

Mura stood up, abruptly, her hands still resting on her stomach. "I'm sorry," she said, her voice cracking. "I think that I should open the window. I-I think this pregnancy is starting to give me hallucinations. I thought- I-I just heard you say-"

"Mura-" Tsunade started. But the pregnant woman was beyond hearing. She was already half way across the room fumbling with the blinds. "I'm going to go get her that drink of water," Tsunade told Hiruzen. He nodded with a sigh. This could be going better.

"Be quick about it," he mumbled as she went. Mura was hurrying over to the third window now, still muttering about how hot it was in here.

"Mura, please," Hiruzen said.

"No, no no," Mura prattled. "I think maybe I'll go get a fan." She disappeared into the bedroom, just as Tsunade came back in with a cup of water.

"We need to get her sitting again," she mumbled.

"She just needs time," Hiruzen told her. "Everyone handles this different at first. And Kojirama was all she had left."

"And she's pregnant." Tsunade nodded wearily.

"The next few years will be hard for her now," Hiruzen agreed. "But this is our life. Kojirama knew the risks. The village will take care of her now though, and the baby. Don't worry, I'll make su-"

There was a suddenly a loud crash from the next room. It made Hiruzen's heart almost stop. Both of them leapt to their feet and were through the door in an instant. They found Mura Senju on the floor with tears streaming down her cheeks. One hand was on her stomach and the other was on her hip.

Judging from the scene, it looked like her foot had caught on her night stand, and then half way down to the ground her hip had smashed into the table's corner. There was no blood from what Hiruzen could tell, but something was still clearly wrong.

"Mura, Mura, what hurts?" Tsunade demanded. She was in full on medic mode, and her hands were already glowing green as she started her examination. In response, Mura let out another pained wail.

"My stomach! The baby," she cried out. The ground was wet, but not with blood. Oh no, Hiruzen thought to himself, feeling his stomach knot. He knew what it meant.

"Sensei, her water broke. The baby is coming now," Tsunade said urgently. "I think the fall also might have broken her hip too. I don't want to move her, not alone at least. I might need to deliver it here. I need you to get Biwako-san, and tell her exactly what happened. None of the other nurses will be as good as her. Tell her to bring everything we're going to need. Understand?"

Hiruzen looked desperately from Mura to Tsunade and back again. This wasn't in his comfort zone at all. With a quick grunt of agreement, he went straight for the window. And as he bolted over the roof tops towards his house, where his wife would be taking care of his two sons, he couldn't help but feel as if Tobirama's stone eyes were fixated on his back.

I hope I don't lose the rest of you today. He thought.

Hiruzen leaned against a pale hospital wall, a sick feeling resting in his stomach. It had taken Biwako and Tsunade four hours to move Mura to the hospital, and she hadn't been quiet about it in the slightest. Hiruzen had been there for the births of both of his children, but Biwako was really quite the soldier. She had screamed sure, but she stayed strong through all of it, more or less. This was so different.

Part of him thought that maybe his wife just had a high pain tolerance, but while he didn't doubt that was true, another part of him knew that something was going wrong in there. Tsunade was the best medic in the village, even though she was only 25, and Biwako had delivered half the clan babies in the village. Between the two of them it should have been fine.

But those four hours had been so long. Mura's hip was definitely broken, and on top of that, he'd overhear Biwako saying that the baby might have been breach.

That wasn't good. Maybe under better conditions it would have been more manageable, if Mura's hip had been fine, if she had been in the hospital already when this started, if Kojirama was here to hold her hand through this pain.

Hiruzen shook his head, and closed his eyes, pushing himself into a state of meditation. It would do nobody any good if he worried himself sick over this.

More time passed, and the clock on the wall made its rounds. Hiruzen let his focus drift elsewhere to other problems and other responsibilities. Finally, after what seemed like a second lifetime, the door opened in front of him, and Biwako steppes out.

She looked stern, with sweat on her brow, and blood on her white sleeves. Nothing about her expression was comforting.

After a beat of silence, she spoke. "We saved the baby," Biwako said solemnly. "It's a girl." And there it was- the cold hard truth of things. Tobirama's great grand-daughter hadn't been alive for even an hour, and she was already an orphan.

"Is Tsunade with the baby?" Hiruzen asked.

"No, one of the nurse's is caring for it right now. Tsunade hasn't left Mura just yet," Biwako shook her head. That was even worse. Tsunade never explained herself to anyone, but Hiruzen had watched her grow. She was a medic because she had lost so many people, and every face that she couldn't save never really left her.

"Hiruzen, Tsunade is next of kin," Biwako said softly. He knew she was having the exact same line of thought that he was. She had been there for his three kids whenever it was important. "It's different with Nawaki, but she's not ready to truly take care of that baby."

"I know," Hiruzen despaired quietly. "But I can't let Tobirama's heir move into an orphanage... maybe there's another family, one of the clans or..."

Biwako reached out and took his hand. "What if we took her?" she asked pointedly.

Hiruzen looked up at her with a jolt. "Biwako," his objected. "I'm the Hokage. What sort of precedent would I set if I started taking in orphans? What happens when some child asks me what made that baby more important than the rest of the orphaned kids in village?"

"Than you'll tell them that she was your family, that it was your duty as Hiruzen Sarutobi, and that it had nothing to do with your job. It's not really a lie. Tobirama was like a father to you," she argued.

"I'm barely around enough for Isamu and Asuma as it is," he started to object again.

"I'm already taking care of those two well enough, Saru. One more won't make any difference. Besides, Isamu is going to go to the Academy soon. It might be good for Asuma to have someone to truly grow up next to," she said, raising an eyebrow at him.

Of course, the moment she called him Saru, he had lost.

"Alright," Hiruzen sighed. His head told him that he was going to live to regret this decision, but all the same his heart grew lighter the moment that he resigned himself to it. Lacing his fingers through his wife's, he nodded towards the hospital room. "I suppose I should go meet my new foster daughter," he said gruffly.

Biwako nodded, and led him into the room and through a side door towards the part of the ward where the newborns were brought to be washed. They found Tsunade picking up the little girl. That was good, it meant that his star medic had left the dead mother to the other nurses.

"Hm, white hair," Hiruzen said aloud. "She looks just like a proper Senju."

Tsunade looked up at him. He hadn't seen her look so exhausted in years.

"Mura said she wanted to call her Natsuki," Tsunade said quietly.

"A good name. I think Asuma might have trouble pronouncing it though. He hasn't quite figured out his 'n's yet," Biwako said.

"He'll learn, I suppose they'll have to share a room," Hiruzen agreed thoughtfully. Tsunade's eyes snapped up to him and they shared a meaningful look. Relief washed through her instantly.

"Thank you sensei," she said quietly, hugging him tightly with her free arm.

"Of course," he mumbled, looking down at the newest addition to his family. "Of course."

Arc Title and Chapter Quote from song Dreaming by Smallpools

A/N And so it begins. I already have the next chapter or two written. Expect a once a week update until I run out. Then I'll be posting as often as I write things. So yeah, remember to leave a review :)