Second Thoughts?

It seems that the spontaneous jump in the Jacket development has sparked a raging fire within me and what better way to ignite it by writing some good old Jate, since we seem to be going through a bit of a dry spell at the moment, but I say that if things are as spontaneous as what happened in the end of the sixth episode, then I wonder if a Jate reconciliation is arriving a lot sooner than expected. Hang in there guys cause of what I've seen of this episode we still stand more of a chance to come out of this victorious. Anyhoo in the meantime I hope you guys will like this little thingie I wrote in a fit of extreme rage at the time, but now realisation has hit and it all makes jaterrific sense to me. I hope it does for you guys as well ;)

Summary : Set a few weeks after Jack and Juliet's second kiss. They still haven't heard from the freighter, but life continues to go on for one Miss Austen who's feeling more alone than ever.

Enjoy

In all her months she spent on this island she had never felt such a sense of unease being here. For once she was longing for rescue to come because after having been told something that shattered her heart to smithereens, she felt that she had no reason to be here. Nothing to look forward to anymore other than the reality of her life, a life behind bars which oddly seemed like the best solution in her mind at the moment. A freeing one if that made a lick of sense to any normal person.

"Kate?" she heard an unknown voice call out in the form of a plea from behind her, and she literally used all the will in her body to regard the voice with a response, cause to be honest she wasn't in an all helping mood at the moment.

"Hey, um……"

"It's Dan." the tall, sturdy man chipped in with the hint of a smile gracing his features, but it soon faded to only be replaced by an expression of complete discomfort, which lead the brunette across from him to go into alert mode.

"Is everything okay?" she asked anyway while already allowing her hands to reach out for his weakening form. The reason for this change becoming clear to her when she placed her hand over the surface of his slightly dampened forehead. The expanse so hot that it almost forced her to flinch in return, but in the end she resorted to acting on her instinct, and that was acquiring the nearest form of help, but was she ready to face him again and not envision that scene playing in her head again. The constant reminder being made known to her over the past few weeks when she constantly witnessed them cuddling, kissing and basically acting like two love sick teenagers.

The way he had so tenderly kissed her, embraced her and constantly assured her that he would protect her no matter what, and what stunned her to say the least was that he barely knew this woman, but still he seemed to be going forward with this relationship and moving on from what she was convinced he wanted with her instead.

It was one of the reasons she came back.

"Kate I ….." she was reminded yet again, and then snapped out of her reverie as a result. The one place where all her dreams and fantasies became a reality, preferably in the form of a gorgeous brown eyed Doctor. Speaking of the Doctor, where was he? And why was she suddenly the second "Doctor" in command when he was supposedly unavailable. Although those plaguing thoughts would have to be pushed to the side for the moment cause they were more important things to deal with. Starting with the withering person next to her. His survival depending on her basic learning to cure such an illness.

"Sorry, here let's get you back to my tent." she instructed before she even took the time to think of what she had just suggested. She was no Doctor and certainly not one who could compare to the one she was desperately infatuated with. Never the less her legs seemed to continue on with the thankfully short journey to her shelter. Her breath being let out in relief when she spotted the small section in the corner of her tent where she stashed the basic things like pills, bandages and all.

Her lie down and drink some of this." she quickly gestured for him to lie on the previously cluttered make shift bed and when he followed through with her instruction, she then retrieved the half empty bottle of water she had been carrying in her pack and gently positioned it at it's designated area.

"That's it, good, good." she coaxed and let out a brief smile at the many times she had heard him say it to his patients and even her for that matter. Those were the good times, she reminded herself. A time she wished she could have gone back to, to perhaps change things, but who was she really kidding.

"I…..uh… ahhhh." she heard the figure below her mumble along with a string of words that made no apparent sense to her but she estimated that it was probably due to the strong fever he had developed as a result of staying in the scorching heat of the sun for too long. Plus the fact that their stock of food on the beach had become somewhat of a scarcity could also be another plausible reason for this man's illness, but she was considerably relieved that whatever she had given him along with the water had managed to calm him and his condition into a peaceful slumber. The sight reminding her of yet another memory.

(Flashback 3 and a half months ago)

"Where are you going?" she asked while going on the alert to try and get him back to the one place she was convinced would benefit him in the long run, his earlier collapse at the funeral almost forcing her heart to stop.

"I'm going to find Locke……" he tried arguing, but it seemed relentless to weaken the brunette's determination to get him to do the one thing he hadn't done in a while.

"You need to lie down."

"No I don't…."

"I strongly advise it." she issued with a firm sense of determination in her voice, but the smile present on her features was enough to make him dismiss the possibility that it rooted from anger. Anger for not having taken care of himself.

"Advise it?" he repeated in a sarcastic manner but his failing strength made it hard for him to keep up the tempo.

"Advice." he tried one last time before his growing exhaustion as a result of the transfusion he had performed earlier got the better of him, but he had the slightest inclination that it was perhaps something more.

"Okay…..what's going on now?" he managed to ask as his body seemed to shut itself off at an almost rapid pace. The cause clearly that of some medication of some kind. He could decipher at least that much before he was forced to act on it's effects.

"Lie down, okay. I crushed up some sleeping pills -- put them in your juice." she confessed with a visible trace of guilt for having to resort to this method, but to a certain extent she was only doing it because she cared so damn much for him.

"Why would you -- you drugged me?" he responded in a genuine state of shock while trying his level best to fight his drooping eyelids.

"Yeah" she shrugged and replied quite simply forcing Jack to let out the combination of a huff and a chuckle at the same time.

"Oh, okay." he responded in a dragged out manner due to the fact that his body finally gave into exhaustion. His eyes slowly closing and his mouth opening ever so slightly to elicit a light snoring. A heartbreakingly cute quality for the watchful brunette to absorb.

"Night." she whispered while a pleasant smile still adorned her calmed features.

(End of flashback)

She could still remember every detail of that day, along with the other memories they had so fortunately shared together. So where did it all go wrong? She asked herself and almost immediately she felt like kicking herself in the head for it, cause she was the reason this rift occured between them. She was the one who was clearly lying to herself at considering the possibility that Sawyer could be anything more to her than just a friend. She knew that now, but her confusion at the time forced her to become somewhat reckless with her actions and now she was living with the consequences. Now all she had to ask herself was……

Was she strong enough to withstand this?

Would she be able to live with them as just being friends, or would she try what she felt spark within her heart when she learned of Jack's newfound affections for Juliet. The spark to fight for what she believed was rightfully hers all along.

"Kate?" she heard a distinct voice from just outside her tent assumingly asking for some kind of help. A thing she still wasn't used to, but since Jack was away with God knows who she figured that she could hold down the fort in the meantime. So with that in mind she transformed herself into leader mode and took on the obstacles any leader would have to face with their people.

By the end of the day she was wiped out and barely able to stand on her own two feet, but still she found the time to devote herself to the one thing that seemed to make everything better , sinking. Almost like a drug but ten times more soothing, and more effective in helping ease some of those thoughts and doubts still running around in her head.

"So your still trying to sink your way off the island huh." she heard an all familiar voice joke behind her and she couldn't help but elicit a friendly chuckle, although a part of her saddened at the reminder that that's all they were now, friends.

"A girls' gotta try." she shot back with a raise of the eyebrow as he appeared alongside her, her heart racing as always when he came within viewing range of her.

"So where were you today Jack?" she found the audacity to ask him, her mind tired of playing any more games because it really got them nowhere in the long run.

"Decided to take a day off, clear my head." he replied while keeping his gaze firmly rooted to the ground. The awkwardness so apparent to her that it almost forced her to smile, but she reined herself in, in the end and decided to wait for him to elaborate on the sudden change in his ways. Was Juliet responsible for it? She thought with a bitter wave running through her heart at the very thought that this woman was already replacing her.

"So how was your day?" he asked instead, her hopes being shattered yet again and all she could do now was put on the semblance of a happy face while feeling nothing but pure anger roaring to rise to the surface.

"Busy." she replied shortly while then trying to avert her gaze from him as much as possible. The view of the calming horizon being her point of focus now.

"I know I heard, and I just wanted to thank you." he replied while showing a genuine sense of gratitude for helping him out in a time of extreme need. The verbal sentiment earning him an acknowledgement, and once they finally made eye contact it was all there. So much so that even a blind person would know it was present. The want, the lust all of it and the light of the nearby campfire's on the beach only forced it to become more noticeable in the dark of the night, but as expected both parties were once again wary of what this might bring. Jack more so than Kate now because over the past few weeks he had grown considerably close to Juliet. Them not having consummated their relationship of course, but a part of him felt that giving it a try wouldn't hurt anyone, especially if the brunette didn't seem to feel for him in the way he originally thought.

Although he was curious to find out why she did it? Why would she still help him out after hearing about what happened a few weeks ago?

"Your…..your welcome" she felt was all she could offer other than what her mind was quickly formulating at the moment, all of which belonged in a more private area and time, she thought ruefully as she washed those thoughts away knowing that it could never happen no matter how much she wanted it, but she couldn't seem to dismiss the possibility, especially as she watched his eyes roam hungrily over the expanse of her slender clothed body.

For the next few minutes they just stood there wordlessly staring at each other, each one's thoughts somehow matching with the others, and it was a shame that they possessed this mutual skill and didn't even know about it. All they could do was show it through their eyes, and Kate was literally begging for him to say something, but in the end he just shook his head briefly to shake away anything he might have become a victim to, and with that the woman across gave up as well. Her hopes being shattered for the third time tonight and she wasn't gonna wait around for a fourth.

"I think I'm gonna call it a night." she suggested while nervously inching her feet towards her destination. His reply coming in the form of an agreeing nod, and her expression managed to sink somewhat further when she registered the fact that he wasn't gonna stop her in any way. So all she was left to do now was slowly trudge her feet along the sandy expanse of what they had called home for the last four months, Jack being left alone to seriously think over his options.

Either he could go back to his tent and to the woman sleeping within it's confines, or he could go with his heart and talk to the woman he still felt more strongly for. The chances of it in fact being mutual looking extremely promising to him now, especially with the almost mirroring look she gave him a few minutes ago. The same one he had felt for her all along, but was afraid to unleash it fully because he knew that if he did then the concept of control wouldn't even figure.

So what would he do?

Oh yes what will he do, and in the next instalment we'll find out exactly what he'll do, and yes it's going to be a jangsty second chapter, but that's only if you guys want there to be a second chapter in the first place. So it's all up to you guys ;)