Holy Jeebus, my first SG-1 fic! This has been in the works for as long as my muse has had the idea in its twisted little mind, and its probably been about a year. I don't write fanfics often, only when the fancy strikes me, but here you got one gen-yoo-ine song fic, written by yours truly, who does not do chapter fics anymore. One shots are my favorites, and I wish I had more time and inspiration to write them. But enough of this babbling! Onto the story.. XD
Disclaimer thingy they want me to have: I don't own SG-1, I'm not sure who does, but I certainly don't own it. The song is sung by, and probably written by, Mariah Carey, called "I've Been Thinking About You." I think. I don't own it!
Sam sat at her desk, pondering over some new artifacts brought back by an SG team. She had gotten to them before Daniel had, knowing she wouldn't have gotten them to her lab for a few weeks if he had them first. She wasn't particularly interested in them, but knew she needed something to do to keep her occupied until her next scheduled off-world mission. She sighed and went back to her magnifying lens, looking over the alien technology with at least some interest this time. She was startled by a knock on the open lab door.
"Carter," said a stern voice.
She looked up from her work. "Yes sir?" she answered, still somewhat startled as she saw Colonel O'Neill in her doorway. She stood up straight to look at him.
"Its five o'clock, Carter."
She looked at the clock in her lab. "I guess it is, sir." She went back to her work to see if he'd continue with a point to this stopping by.
"Carter, when was the last time you actually ate something? And I don't mean some power bar Daniel dropped off or a cup of coffee you've been sipping over the last half hour." He still stood there in the doorway.
"Sir, I really don't think-" she began as she stood up from her work again.
"Carter, when?"
"About seven thirty this morning, sir." She gave in.
"Get away from your lab and come eat some dinner, Carter."
"But sir.."
"Thinking takes a lot of work, Carter. Come and eat something so you don't suddenly collapse from hunger. We can't have you malnourished so soon before a mission."
She was still reluctant to go. "I'm so glad you're that worried about my well being.." she said, somewhat exasperated, somewhat sarcastic. "I'm still going to stay here, Colonel."
"Carter.. come on. Just come down with me to have a tiny little meal. So you don't die." He put on a pathetic face to get her to leave.
She smiled and closed her eyes. "No, sir. I really need to finish most of this research and document my findings.. Soon I'll be able to send them along to Daniel, who will be extremely glad to have them before the next mission."
"D'oh." He exited and headed towards Daniel's office. She watched him head down the hall and she saw that he apparently persuaded Daniel to go eat with him. He lead Daniel back down the hall, then looked into her door. She shook her head and went back to her work; for a few seconds, anyway, until they headed down the hall towards the mess.
She sighed as she saw them walk out of sight and was kind of sad that she didn't go with them. She just couldn't leave, couldn't let her feelings get the best of her. She'd been working with him for seven years. Seven long, rewarding years. It was only natural to feel close to him. But there was something that told her that it wasn't just the family type close that she had been telling herself (and the press). Over the last seven years, her heart had grown fond and fluttery over one Colonel Jack O'Neill.
We've known each other
For a long, long time
But I never really noticed
All the magic in your eyes
I've been around you
A thousand times before
And you've always been a friend to me
But now I'm wanting more
Damn, that woman was stubborn. One lousy meal in the mess. That's all he asked for- and he even made it seem like it was because she needed to eat something before she died. What could he say? "Carter, come eat with me so we can have a long and interesting conversation, because I want to know what's going on in your life that has nothing to do with the Stargate or anything even close to resembling one." Not only would that be frank, but it would be weird. And not very 'Jack-esque,' either. He had an image to maintain.
So he ate with Daniel, pretending to listen to what he had to say about old rocks. To him, all he heard was "Blah blah blah off world blah blah research blah blah blah translate blah blah.." He spent his meal remembering days past.
He thought of his first few days as commanding officer of SG-1. He thought of rescuing Daniel, saving Teal'c from his post aiding the false gods, of Carter's infamous feminist speech, to which he told her he just had a problem with scientists, her reaction being a challenge to an arm wrestle.
He thought of the three months he spent in hope someone would rescue him from the simple life away from earth. For a hundred days he grew close to Laira, but knew that he could never love her, that she could never substitute for all he left behind, his team, his friends. And when he learned Carter spent every waking hour and many hours she should have been sleeping working to get him back.. That sent his heart floating with joy, even though he never showed it.
Then the thoughts of being a Za'tarc came back. His absolute confusion at how he was considered one, how he didn't realize what he was holding back. He was so good at lying, especially to himself. He had simply pushed it to the back of his brain, and was surprised when Carter brought it up. Of course, he hadn't said more than needed to that evil bitch, Freya.. Anise.. Freya.. whichever. Who knows what she would have done, considering her little display before he decided to undergo the experimental cure. It might have saved Carter, he told himself. Then she had the courage and stupidity for a single second to even consider.. all he knew was that he was relieved, confused, and thankful afterward.
Then there was the time loop he was stuck in for over God knows how long. Enough said.. He smiled.
Daniel had seen that smile before and knew that Jack wasn't listening. Oh well, nothing new.
I must have been so blind
I never realized
You're the one that's right for me
All the while I couldn't see
And now I feel so strange
I'll never be the same
Going 'round and 'round in circles
And I don't know what to do
'Cause baby
Sam finally decided to put the things away. She had gotten all she would from them, considering Daniel hadn't gotten the chance to translate the markings. By now, she had started to get hungry. There was a slight edge to the hunger; she almost never got really hungry anymore. It was just a slight pang now that told her to eat something of some substance. She thought of wandering down to the mess, but didn't want to risk running into Colonel O'Neill. So instead of heading down to the mess, she went to steal something from Daniel's office. She turned around to head back to her lab when oops- she met two familiar faces in the hall.
"Carter, shame. Sneaking food from your coworkers?" Jack said with a hint of playful accusation.
She held the donut she had acquired behind her back. "Of course not, sir. Just.. checking for new information.." she quickly lied.
"Sure.. Turn around, Carter." He motioned with his finger to turn. She complied, moving her hands as she went so as to not let them see the donut. "Carter, your hands." She reluctantly held out her right hand, which had nothing, then her left, which had transferred the donut to the right behind her back. "Both, Carter." She held out both of her hands, which cradled the donut.
"For you, sir?" she offered. She tried to lock eyes with him, but he wouldn't cooperate.
He sighed. "Take the donut and go back to your lab, Carter."
"Thank you, sir," she said as she turned to head back to the dark room that was her laboratory. Her pounding heart slowed as she walked back down the corridor. Thoughts centered on him, she had to keep control. It was so unlike her to feel like this.. What had sparked this change? Why was she so confused? Why wasn't Jack just her CO anymore?
I've been thinking about you
In the most peculiar way
I've been thinking about you
It's unbelievable to me
But suddenly I think
I'm falling in love with you
He watched her walk back down the hallway. Except only he knew that he was actually watching her long legs and cute butt, nice waistline and trim arms. Dammit. After seven years, he'd done that a lot. What he said about caring about her more than he should- this was true. It had been since the first year they had met. Well, that's not quite true. He was still in denial he could ever care for anyone ever again. So, it was more like the second year he was working with her that he started to feel an attachment that he wasn't supposed to. But how could he not? She made it so damn hard not to.
Shall he list the ways? She's gorgeous. She's unbelievably intelligent. She can see through people with the greatest of ease. She cares about so much, and does everything she can to help one of those things which she cares about. Including him. She's sensitive. She always wants to help. And she hates it when she lets people down. She understands the Simpsons. She understands.
And therefore, she was perfect.
Well, she had her flaws, but those flaws only made him like her more. Like how she had learned to disobey orders. That made him proud. Damn proud.
But that was beside the point. What the hell was he going to do about it?
He tried to figure it out, but came up with nothing. All of these... questions seemed to pop up randomly that particular week.. okay, just that day. But he was so confused. He knew it was wrong, he knew it wasn't ethical, but it was just the way he felt, dammit. He knew he wasn't allowed to feel this way but was there anything in his heart that could tell him otherwise. The way he felt was just the way he felt, regardless. Rules couldn't stop that, but they could stop him from doing anything about it.
And he just couldn't figure out what to do.
There's no explaining how I feel inside
I'm going through a transformation
That's so hard for me to hide
I had a revelation that
Finally opened up my eyes
The one I spent a lifetime searching for
Was right here all the time
Sam made it back to her lab and turned on the light for her microscope, but was extremely distracted. When she was just a cadet at the AFA she would have been overwhelmed to see such technology as this, but that was a good while ago, and now she had other things on the mind. Things with a dry, witty sense of humor and piercing chocolate eyes. She shook her head in an attempt to block out the thoughts. 'Its not right!' she thought. 'I shouldn't feel like this!'
It would have made sense that because she was such a stickler for the rules that her brain wouldn't let her think anything like that for someone she worked with, let alone her commanding officer. But it didn't matter what her brain knew, it mattered what her heart thought. And she hated that she let her emotions get the best of her when her job called for her to make reliable, smart, and logical decisions that emotions played no part in. However, this was not the case.
Another knock on the door. Her heart pounded and she looked up, but it was Teal'c. She sighed with slight relief and invited him in.
"Anything you need?" she asked him.
"Indeed, MajorCarter. I was sent to ask you a question by DanielJackson."
"Does he want to know when he's going to get the artifacts?" she asked dryly.
"Indeed he does."
She reached over the table and grabbed three small things off of a random pile of papers and handed them to Teal'c. "Give him my wishes of luck in the translation," she said and smiled softly as she went back to her microscope. Ah, the wonders of scientific microscopes. Teal'c bowed as he left and stepped out the door and walked down the hall. She heard another knock at the door. She didn't look up from her work.
"Did I forget one, Teal'c?" she asked.
"Unless I shaved my head and ever switched sides from the bad guys, I'm not exactly Teal'c," came a familiar voice. She snapped up and turned around.
"Sorry, Sir!" she said, flustered.
"Not a problem, Carter." He came into the lab.
"Was there anything you needed or wanted, Sir?" she asked, going back to her work, which was completely voluntary and not assigned.
"Not really.." he said, picking up random things. She heard him shuffling and smiled.
"Are you currently holding a little brown cube with red writing on it and a half sphere on one side?" she asked.
He raised an eyebrow. "How'd you know?"
"You have a knack for picking up the most dangerous and the strangest looking artifacts," she said simply.
"..Oh." Carter was very astute in her observations about people. He opened his mouth to ask something but closed it when he realized it was quite a stupid question. Then he put the object down. Apparently, there was a large chance it was dangerous.
"Are you bored, Sir?" she asked, turning around to face him. She turned off the light for the microscope.
"No.." he lied. She sent over the glare. "Bored as hell, Carter," he admitted.
"Did you come here first or did Daniel kick you out?" she asked, walking over his way.
"Here, of course. I just couldn't wait to see what my favorite 2IC had in store for me."
"Don't you have paperwork, Sir?"
"I always have paperwork, Carter. And if you know anything about me, I avoid it for as long as possible."
She smiled. "Of course. Was there anything you wanted to accomplish by seeing me first before you headed off to bother Daniel after finding no solace from your boredom?"
I was oblivious
So very out of touch
All the while I couldn't see
You're the one that's right for me
And now my world has changed
I'll never be the same
Going 'round and 'round in circles
And it's all because of you
Sweet baby
He turned around in a chair, swirling and stopping abruptly. "Not so much, no."
"Did you have anything you wanted to speak to me about?"
"Nope."
"Then, with all due respect, why are you here?""Because I'm bored!" he told her.
"I know that.. here." She tossed him a yo-yo. "You left this in here."
"That's where I left it!" he said, catching the toy. He immediately started playing with it, trying to do tricks, but failing miserably. She chuckled at his failure.
"It isn't that hard, Sir."
"Oh yeah?"
She took the yo-yo from him and did the knot around her finger and threw it down, sleeping it just so. She did a few tricks with it, rolled it back up and gave it to him. "See? Not so hard."
He looked at her in disbelief. "How'd you do that?" he asked.
"My brother was a yo-yo fanatic at one point in his life.. I learned." She shrugged.
"Teach me," he said.
Don't you know
That you're blowing my mind
What you do to me
I can't describe
Baby I can't hold back anymore
I just can't conceal it
You're the one I really adore
"Are you really that bored?" she asked.
"If the only other option is paperwork, you betcha."
She sighed and sat next to him. "In order to be able to get the trick done, you have to make sure you sleep it well enough. Otherwise it will quit in the middle of the trick."
He threw down the yo-yo just so, and it slept for about ten seconds. "Incredible. Now, show me how to do that one trick."
"The cradle?"
"That one."
"It's simple really, but it has to be coordinated just right. You saw me do it, right?" He nodded. "Just try what you saw me do, and I'll help you from there."
He tried, and got farther than he had before but failed to get the yo-yo back into his hand. He looked at her, confused.
"You did well, Sir, but you didn't sleep it quite hard enough. Try it again." He did.
And he succeeded! He was so giddy. Well, as giddy as Jack could get. He looked at her with that great sparkle in his eye, smiling about as big as Sam had ever seen him smile. And she couldn't help smile back. It was just something about him.. he had a way of infecting others with his emotions. If he was in a sarcastic angsty mood, it just sort of made her a bit irritated with her surroundings, and wherever he was happy, and decided to share it, there wasn't a snowball's chance in hell that she would be anything but happy.
"Seems like you're far more suited to use this than me, so do something else and keep me entertained.." he said, handing it back to her, brushing fingers, causing shivers to run up and down both their spines in that good, tingly way. His hand decided to move very slowly on its own, something his mind was telling him not to do. Yeah, his hands had other plans.. He shook his head at the thought and released his hand quickly, a small look of disbelief on his face. Sam's had brought her hand quickly up to her chest to meet the other hand in an almost praying position, head down, cheeks tinted.
"Sir?" she asked softly after a minute or so of nervous, awkward silence.
"Yeah, Carter?" he said, trying to get that professional air to come back.
"I'm kind of hungry.."
"The mess?"
"The mess," she replied affirmatively, setting down the yo-yo, knees softly shaking as she stood up from her chair and turned off the light on her microscope. He waited for her to get in his vicinity before getting up himself, a soft expression on his face. They walked down to the mess together, just being near each other without the interruption of words, hands brushing slightly every so often, small smiles not even attempted to be suppressed.
I've been thinking about you
In the most peculiar way