Can't sleep. He can't sleep. No matter how hard he tries. He knows he's tired, yet sleep won't come to him.
Voldemort turns in the bed for the umpteenth time this night and groans quietly as he checks the time again, 5:30.. he may as well give up hope to get any rest tonight as well. He turns again and looks at Quirrell, sleeping peacefully next to him. Voldemort can't help but feel a slight hint of jealousy inside of him, but he dismisses that right away. He's just glad Quirrell isn't going through the same thing he is. At least Quirrell is the one who has a job and actually need his rest. It doesn't really matter if Voldemort can't sleep, it's not as important. He just stays inside the house all day anyway. The worst thing is that even every type sleep potion Voldemort has been making, and even tinkering with himself, doesn't work. He looks over to the nightstand, where an empty bottle is lying on the side, even his usual OCD-like tendencies with having everything neat and in order aren't as strong as before. He's just so exhausted.
Voldemort waits for Quirrell's alarm to go off at 6:30 and watches as his lover wakes up slowly and groggily and sits up in the bed, rubbing the sleep from his eyes.
"Hey you. Good morning." Voldemort says, trying to mask the exhaustion in his voice.
Quirrell looks over to Voldemort and stops rubbing his eyes. "Oh. Voldy, I was hoping you'd manage to get some sleep finally," he says and places a hand on Voldemort's shoulder, "did you get any rest?"
Voldemort closes his eyes and shakes his head, shrugging. "I don't know why, but even that extra strong sleep potion I cooked up yesterday had no effect." he says.
Quirrell can see how desperately tired Voldemort is and a frown appears on his face for a little bit. "We really need to get to the bottom of this. This isn't good for you, you need your rest!" he says and grabs Voldemort's hand with his own, squeezing it gently.
Sitting up himself, Voldemort squeezes Quirrell's hand back and sighs. "Oh it doesn't matter, really. Not like I have anything I need to be well rested for, anyway.." he says with another sigh. "I mean, you're the one who has a job and all that!"
"That doesn't matter. You still need rest, your brain needs rest, or it'll stop functioning properly." Quirrell says and hesitates for a short while and pulls his hand back, "I- I know that from personal experience.."
At that, Voldemort looks at Quirrell, who is now staring into his palms. Can he be talking about his time in Azkaban? He must be, Quirrell only ever gets like this when thinking about Azkaban. Understandably so, it's a horrible place. "I'm sorry." Voldemort says quietly and moves closer to Quirrell and gently grabs his hands, "I didn't mean to cause you to think about.. that place, again. It wasn't intentional, I know. But that doesn't matter."
Quirrell gives Voldemort a hug and smiles when Voldemort returns the hug. "No it's okay, Voldy. You are the only good thing I can connect with Azkaban. That day when you came for me. When you came home.."
Voldemort blinks to try and remove the tears that are building up in his eyes, and tightens the hug. After everything he's put Quirrell through, he's always amazed that Quirrell actually loves him. "Dude. Why'd you have to say something sappy like that..!" he says with a lump in his throat. "I had to come home. I love you."
"I love you too, sweetie. Now! We need to figure something out to help you sleep. I have an idea. Go take a shower and freshen up while I get stuff ready." Quirrell says with a smile. As Voldemort seems to be about to protest, he adds: "Nope. I don't care. I'm taking the day off from work. This is more important. Now go."
Admitting defeat, Voldemort can only get up and get in the shower. He takes a long, relaxing, warm shower; letting the water pound on his head and his neck. Sighing with relief, Voldemort enjoys the water running over his naked body and the fact that it's making him feel more relaxed. But he doesn't want to spend too long in the shower and decides to get out, before drying himself instantly with a quick spell. He puts on a simple t-shirt and jeans. Not the ones he has been wearing for the past few days, Quirrell brought him clean ones while Voldemort was in the shower. His favourite too t-shirt too. With a slight smile, he puts on the fresh clothes and looks in the bathroom mirror. The circles around his eyes are much more prominent than they usually are. "Tch. I guess Quirrell's right about me needing rest."
As Voldemort walks down the stairs, he can hear Quirrell running around, bottles clinking and the rustle of paper bags. "What are you up to?" Voldemort asks as he walks into the kitchen, leaning against the door frame.
Quirrell looked up from making sandwiches and at Voldemort, grinning. "It's a surprise!" he says and goes back to making sandwiches.
Voldemort only smiles a tired smile and watches as Quirrell makes food. Usually Voldemort is the one who handles all the food making in the house, but lately he's been too tired to do much of anything, so Quirrell has had to step in. That only serves to make Voldemort feel even worse about not being able to sleep.
"There! That's the last one." Quirrell says with a triumphant grin, as he packs the last of the food and grabs the bags. "Go put on a sweater or something, the weather is supposed to be good today but not until a bit later in the day."
Voldemort's eyes widen and he doesn't really know what to say. "I- wha-.. Are we going somewhere? Am I going somewhere?" he asks with a surprised look on his face. He isn't used to leaving the house at all so this seems all very sudden to him.
Quirrell's grin widens. "Yep! We're going for a bit of a trip. You really need to leave the house more. Staying cooped up inside all the time doesn't do you any good. My sleeping got all kinds of messed up when I was in Azkaban, eventually I stopped being able to sleep much at all.. I think it has a lot to do with being locked up, having nothing to do."
Voldemort only blinks and stares at Quirrell, his mouth open like he's about to speak but no words find their way out past his lips.
"It's only a theory, but it's worth a try, no?" Quirrell asked. "Worst case, nothing changes. But we'll have a nice day out. I know a few places I think you'll enjoy."
Quirrell's enthusiasm is a bit contagious, Voldemort can't help but feel excited for today. His first time going out proper. He's also very excited to see what Quirrell has in store for the two of them. Voldemort puts on a simple zip-up hoodie before following Quirrell out the door.
Grabbing a few more supplies on the way out, Quirrell packs it all into the trunk of the car and gets in the driver's seat. Voldemort gets in the passenger seat and buckles the seat belt, just like Quirrell had taught him. He really doesn't like this mode of transportation, but he doesn't have many options right now. Quirrell smiles at Voldemort as he pulls out of the driveway, giggling a bit as Voldemort clutches at the seat belt when the car starts moving, getting a very annoyed look from Voldemort in return.
They drive on in comfortable silence for a while, Voldemort quickly forgetting about his death grip on the seat belt as he looks out the window at everything passing by them. All these houses, a person now and again. He's never really paid attention to how different the houses in the neighbourhood are. Some are small and cute, others are large and blocky, not so cute. The sky is clear and the sun is out, the weather is fantastic and Voldemort can't help but think about how cute Quirrell looks while driving, shooting him a smile when he looks over at Voldemort.
After about 45 minutes of driving, they've left the town and entered a more rural area. Green plains on both sides and a farm house here and there. Voldemort let his eyes wander a bit, spotting animals like sheep here and there, grazing. "Is it much further?" he asks with a yawn. "I'm sorry.."
Quirrell smiles and shakes his head. "It's alright. I know you're tired. We'll get there in a little bit. In fact, here's where we turn." he says as he slows down the car and makes a left turn and drives up a dirt road. "I used to visit a farm when I was younger, I had some relatives on my mother's side who would let me visit for a few days now and again. It's very pretty there and I think it'll make a nice place to eat an early lunch."
Voldemort perks up as he hears that, this is the first time Quirrell mentions these relatives. Whatever the reason for that, Voldemort is happy to get to share in something from Quirrell's past that is obviously very dear to him. As they get closer, Voldemort can see a farmhouse. He can see a brook close to it. And there are flowers, so many flowers, all around. No wonder Quirrell thinks this place is pretty.
They get out of the car after Quirrell finds a place to park, Quirrell then leads Voldemort to a clearing, next to the brook. Quirrell puts down a picnic blanket and starts taking out food and drinks from the bags they brought. Voldemort sits down next to Quirrell and gives him a kiss on the cheek.
"Thank you. This is amazing. I had no idea how fresh the air could be." he says as he accepts the sandwich Quirrell hands him.
Quirrell just smiles and grabs a sandwich of his own. They eat in silence and just listen to the birds chirping and insects buzzing. Voldemort looks over to the farmhouse and notices that it's all dark inside and some windows have been boarded up. He looks back over at Quirrell, but doesn't bring it up.
After eating their fill, Voldemort lays down and rests his head on Quirrell's lap. Quirrell starts telling Voldemort about his relatives, the time he spent here was good. There was always cake and other sweets freshly baked and he could run around and conjure up flowers as he is so fond of doing. Voldemort didn't dare interrupt Quirrell, so he just lies there and listens, holding hands with Quirrell. Feeling very relaxed, so much so that he can't help but close his eyes. "Hey Squirrell. Why- why does the house look abandoned?" he finally asks, a while after Quirrell stops talking. He can feel Quirrell fidget nervously.
"Short version: they died and had no one to take over the farm for them." he says matter of factly, after a short pause.
"I'm sorry to hear that.. it sounds like you cared about them. And they cared about you." Voldemort says, squeezing Quirrell's hand. Why can't he just shut up for once and not unintentionally hurt Quirrell..? Why can't he just be a good partner for once..?
"It's okay. It happened a long time ago. And besides, now I have you." Quirrell says and caresses Voldemort's face, running his fingers over Voldemort's jawline and cheek, before leaning over and giving him a long and deep kiss. "That's all that matters."
Voldemort savours the kiss and feels his whole body relax, all of his worries about being a bad partner momentarily fade away. They stay like this for a while, holding each other's hands and Quirrell gently caressing Voldemort's face. This, coupled with their serene surrounding, causes Voldemort to enter into a state of deep relaxation. Shortly after, he's fallen asleep and Quirrell smiles. This isn't going to fix everything, but it's certainly a start. "At least Voldy is getting some rest, finally." he says to himself and looks over at the farmhouse, "Thank you for everything."