If you need to know anything about Grif, his entire personality boils down to two things: he won't do anything actually productive, but will do anything if it's a bet. It didn't help that most bets ended with pain or vomiting or both. But Grif was as steel-willed and stupid as people could get, especially if it meant an extra 50 bucks.

Which was how he ended up faking a marriage with Simmons for three and half weeks in the middle of wedding season. It was the beginning of June when a friend of his proposed (pun intended) the idea. Grif said he would never get married, but every season he would joke around the thought with his sister. Until one season, when yet another friend pulled Kai and Grif to the side to announce her engagement.

"Well, I guess that means that I am officially the only single person out of everyone I know." Kai snarked as she took a sip of her beer.

Grif furrowed his brow. "Wait, what about me?"

"What about you? You've got Simmons, don't you?"

Grif snorted in disbelief, but failed to look chill when he hesitated to reply. "You know I can't stand Simmons."

"Then why do you two go to every wedding together?"

Grif sipped the last of his beer, and walked to the fridge to look for more. "It's a routine we have. I pretend to bring him back a second plate of food, and then eat it along the way. You can't imagine how many cubes of ham and cheese I can scarf in 30 seconds."

"Yeah, I know. It's somehow disgusting and kind of admirable." She finished off her own beer, and stared at it for a second. As if she saw something devious on the front label, she grinned darkly. "Say, are you gonna go to that wedding with him, then."

"You know it. Gotta get my processed food fix." He found another beer in the back of the fridge and popped it's top.

"How about a bet?" Grif stopped the bottle and inch from his mouth.

"I'm game." He smirked. "What are we talking?"

Kai paused, and held up a hand. "Two seconds." She shouted into another room. "Simmons! Get in here!"

Simmons entered the kitchen, and Kai's grin got wider. "I have a bet for the both of you." Simmons sighed, but didn't leave. "100 dollars each."

Both of their ears perked. That was larger than any bet Grif had ever taken. Grif set down his beer. "Now I'm really game."

Kai held up four fingers. "There are four weddings going on in the next couple of months. And since you two are so good at cheating people out of horderves, I want you to make it a little more realistic." She paused for dramatic effect. "All you have to do is pretend you're married, or engaged, or banging. Whatever. In a relationship. For this wedding season." She crossed her arms smugly.

It still hadn't hit Simmons fully by the time that Grif said yes, but when it did, it hit hard. "Wait, what does that mean? Like, act like a couple? Tricking people for extra food is one thing, but isn't this a little too far?"

Kai pulled out two twenty dollar bills. "I'll give this to you if you start tomorrow."

Simmons had his bags packed three hours later, and was wheeling them into Grif's apartment not thirty minutes after that.