Disclaimer: I do not own Fushigi Yuugi or the Mike Teavee song. If I did, I would be a sexy woman……don't ask….



My Fushigi Yuugi poem (parody of the "P.S. Regarding Mike Teavee song)

The most important thing I've learned

So far as FY is concerned

Is never never never let

Chiriko get upset

Or better still, don't even call

Tasuki to go to the mall

In almost every house we've been

I see him drinking the person's gin!

And Tasuki is absolutely drunk

I gotta get him off that alcoholic junk

Miaka lolls and slops and lounges about

And stares at Tamahome 'til her eyes pop out

(Last week at her house I saw

Her eyeballs rolling on the floor)

She sits and stares and stares and sits

Because she's hypnotized by "it" (Tamahome…lol)

Oh yes, Chichiri is my main thrill

Because he doesn't usually kill

He doesn't choke or kick or punch

And I bet that he can even cook lunch

He is never the weakest link

He's always cheerful and always thinks

My parents say "Fushigi Yuugi is not

What teenagers should be watching, 'dot'

IT ROTS THE SENSES IN THE HEAD

IT KILLS YOUR INTELLIGENCE DEAD

IT CLOGS AND CLUTTERS UP THE MIND

Hey, I didn't know Chichiri's eye was blind….

::ahem:: ANYWAY, YOU CANNOT UNDERSTAND

REAL LIFE AND NOT AN ANCIENT CHINESE LAND!

YOUR BRAIN IS BECOMING AS SOFT AS CHEESE

YOUR POWERS OF THINKING RUST AND FREEZE

AND YOU NOW ONLY SPEAK JAPANESE!!!"

"All right!" I cried "All right!" I say

"But if you take my FY away,

What shall I do to entertain

Myself and my friends, Please explain!"

I'll answer questions by asking you

"Why is Chichiri's hair blue?"

"How do they keep themselves contented

Before video games were invented?"

I'll say it very loud and slow:

THEY……USED TO ….WEED! They'd weed and weed (not the drug you freaks..)

To weed and weed and then proceed.

To weed some more, Great Scott! Good Ranting!!

One have their lives was weeding and sowing and planting!

They planted vegetables, and herbs, and fruit galore!

Food covered up their polished floor!

And in the bedroom, by the lamp

More harvesting went up the ramp

Such wonderous, fine, fantastic fruits!

Bananas, papayas, roasted hamsters, BOOTS!

And green cherries, and blood and gore

Tasuki even harvested wh*res (I better watch my mouth…..

Mitsukake harvested purple pants

Chiriko harvested elephants

Miaka harvested Yukitos, crouched 'round a pot

Stirring away at something hot!

(It smells so good, what can it be?

OH MY GOD! IT'S CHICHIRI!!!!!)

Nuriko harvests women's clothes

And bamboo ears with lilac toes

And Hotohori plants mirrors all over the place

Tamahome reaps money and tries to buy a new face (Take that, liz :- P)

Oh weeds, what weeds they use to know

Those Suzaku Seishi of long ago!

So please, oh please, I beg, I pray

PLEASE NEVER NEVER GO BACK TO THE WEEDING WAY!

P.S. Regarding Fushigi Yuugi

I simply have to wait and see

If I get get my insanity back

If I can't, then give me a car jack!