Thanks so much to my beta FairyTaleHearts! She makes this amazing. I listened to Criminal by Unions while I wrote this, and finished with Surrender by Natalie Taylor if you like to listen to music while you read! Drop a line and let me know what you think, it makes it worth writing these things.


Criminal


Felicity couldn't say her life was going according to plan. Her once obvious future now gone, blown to smithereens in under twenty-four hours.

Everything she'd worked for, the people she'd trusted, all of it was gone. The exact moment the trajectory of her future shifted happened in a most unexpected way. The sudden veering of direction dislodging years of carefully laid plans, backfiring in her face like the joke was on her the whole time.

As badly as Felicity wanted to blame someone, she knew the fault was of her own. There wasn't anyone on this green earth who'd put her in her current predicament. The resulting isolation left an aching sting that wallowed deep in her bones.

The bed she was sleeping in had been in the making for years.

Felicity was now, and always had been, nothing more than a criminal, a runaway, and a thief.

In seventh grade Felicity had been asked the standard question all kids were asked.

What do you want to be when you grow up?

Even in the inexperience of her youth she knew.

Computers called to her, they comforted her in the quiet two-bedroom apartment she shared with her ever absent mother and long forgotten father. In the dark of her room, lulled by the soft glow of a luminescent screen, Felicity had learned a new dialect of code like it was a secret language.

For hours Felicity lost herself in the tangled weaves of wires and gears, learning the power of hidden doors and secret locks. As she grew, cracking codes in her quiet domaine, she learned how doors and walls were never quite so locked, nor uncrackable, their contents unfolding scandalous secrets for her eyes only.

The tunnels and avenues wound on endlessly. The obsession one Felicity fell into with delighted vigor, pealing the layers away meticulously and learning a self-inflated knowledge rimmed with the touch of possibility.

So when the juvenile question of future career opportunity was brought up, Felicity already knew.

Her mother always said she was too smart for her own good and Felicity was not impressed by the standard options, knowing what she wanted wasn't a normal desire and already one far beyond her years.

She would never be a police officer, not a fireman, future politician or doctor. She would protect and serve in her own way. From behind her keyboard. Unbidden by the constraint of red tape government agents windingly navigated through.

Felicity would help the little guy by taking down the big guy in a way others couldn't. She would save all the chumps being crushed by a system that protected the powerful and enslaved the poor. The bullies her mother was forced to answer to, the ones too big to fail, too rich to fall.

She didn't know at the time how all the pieces came together, but she knew her calling was to something bigger than herself. Bigger than the complex processing systems and endless code she could build and write in her sleep.

That drive fueled her through adolescence, pushing her to seek like-minded individuals with similar views and specialized talents. Relentless hours went into grooming and preparing them for a mission, one that once started could never be stopped.

The very act of cracking open pandoras box.

There was no going back.

They say hindsight is twenty-twenty, and while years in front of a computer screen required Felicity to wear glasses, she was sickened to have missed the error of her ways.

The one equation she hadn't anticipated was the equation of her line in ruins. Like Icarus, flying too close to the sun. Felicity had crashed mightily, seared by that sun.

Once an impenetrable empire she'd built from nothing, painstakingly crafted and created over long years, was now a cruel and twisted version of her childhood dreams. The slates of grey shaking the foundation of her black and white views of the world.

She was surprised it had taken her all of twenty-six years to discover her hubris, the cracks splintering like breaking glass.

"Can I get you anything else, Sweetie?" The soft twang pulled Felicity from her self-loathing.

With a smile that felt too fake Felicity shook her head, wringing locked fingers around her porcelain coffee mug.

The waitress smiled politely, the blatant pity in her gaze burning a line of resent through Felicity. She was better than this, better at hiding her emotions from her face, and the realization of her raw transparency made her itch to leave, to keep going, away from here, far away. To run.

"Just let me know if you need anything hun," the woman placated, gesturing to the half filled coffee pot in her hand.

Felicity could only nod with a tight smile, her eyes skittering to the bright widow as the waitress vanished from her peripheral.

This was definitely not how Felicity had imagined her life going.

Blue eyes slid to the bag sitting in the booth beside her. The bag that was her solitary companion on her now aimless journey, her only real lifeline to the world, every secret she'd uncovered, every truth she concealed, everything she'd known and had from before Helix—.

Felicity jerked away from the thought, the familiar lick of panic edging into the limbs of her body, a tingling sensation starting in her fingertips warningly.

Now was not the time to have a panic attack.

The very last thing she needed was to attract any type of attention.

A flickering from a fuzzy TV nestled in the corner of the small diner caught her eye, freezing the blood in her veins. A charming smile caged by a rugged scruff and icy blue eyes evoking a visceral reaction, her throat closing with the sudden onslaught of emotions rushing through her body.

A paralyzing shame had her slinking away from the memories, one hand grabbing the bag at her side and the other digging hastily for the change in her pocket. The desire to hide, to run—as if these people knew her—winning over her downtrodden desire to stay and wallow in the images like a voyeur desperate for glimpses of a better life.

Felicity knew she didn't have that right anymore.

"That's that Queen boy isn't it?" A man at the counter asked, the scruff of his voice traveling the small distance in the diner. The waitress from before cocked her hip along the counter, turning towards the television with her arms crossed.

"Sure is. I'll tell you, I sure don't envy him right now." The waitress commented lightly, the images and sound bites flashing on the screen one Felicity recognized from a past appearance. She could recognize him with her eyes closed. Commonly saw him behind her closed lids in the small parts of her deepest dreams.

The man scoffed, looking away from the TV and down to the empty cup in his hands, "Even if the boy is innocent it's hard to believe he's not guilty of something. The upper elite always have dirty hands." The lack of empathy stung Felicity, made her want to scream and demand an apology. He didn't know these people, didn't know that man, what right did he have to condemn him without knowing the full truth?!

The apology would never be demanded though, her lips pursed, the reason he was being crucified in the media an act of her own hand.

"Being rich doesn't make you guilty." The waitress commented where Felicity couldn't.

"It doesn't help his case any. You can't seriously believe those people are moral citizens. They can buy their way out of anything." The stranger countered, his tone one of obvious exasperation.

Felicity could feel her temper tightening further. She had about all she could subject herself from, and with a steady step she slid from the booth, throwing bills on the table before making her way to the entrance. Her ears were still ringing with the continued exchange happening, glueing her eyes to the floor as she walked past them, head held low.

"They sure can hun, but a small part of me is still rooting for the kid." It was a shocking display of empathy for Felicity. Most people would never think past the thirty second sound bites they saw in magazines and on TV, but she was happy someone had.

Oliver Queen was a good man, and he hadn't deserved what she had put him through.

Felicity could hear the scoffing following her out of the diner, the nip in the air helping clear her clouded head.

"Yeah we'll see."

With her back turned she didn't see the granulated photo of her face pop onto the screen, a trailing red banner rushing information by rapidly. The small, "huh, she looks familiar," trailing off behind the closed door.

Felicity chose to walk over catching a cab, the steady foot fall and distant city noise quieting her crowded thoughts. She allowed herself to think about a new plan, what she had to do, where she had to go, but even still her plans would lull, her mind diverting, driving her back to Starling City.

Back to Oliver Queen.

She wasn't supposed to meet Oliver. That was never part of the plan. Even from the beginning he was an unexpected presence, his role changing the whole dynamic of her master plan.

And it was her plan, which made it all the worse. Felicity had lied to Oliver from the beginning, she had planned to use him, to steal from his company, and to sink the unsinkable elite of Starling City, one rich prick at a time.

But Oliver wasn't what Felicity thought he was.

And Felicity was never who Oliver thought she was.

Everything about Felicity was fake, from the name she gave him to the web of deceit she attempted to pull over his eyes.

Felicity knew Oliver Queen, and Oliver Queen knew Megan Kuttler, the one from the IT department.

Initially Felicity had tried to brush the encounter off, committing herself to keeping the man at arm's length, never straying from the mission.

Her thoughts would traitorously wander though, drifting back to the shockingly soft smile, the subtle shifts of his mighty body, the way his eyes burned like a physical touch that was unexplainable.

The subsequent instances she had with him were intense. The fervent pull Oliver had over her body was unexpected, and Felicity didn't know how to process the waring emotions in her soul. The guilt that followed hot on her heels with every exchange and long look had brought her so close, on so many occasions, to blurting the one truth out.

Her name was Felicity Megan Smoak, child genius, criminal mastermind. The infamous hacker Overwatch. Creator of Helix.

She was on a job, no one knew her face, and scant few would ever suspect a woman. She was easily overlooked and used the persona to slip into many beneficial situations.

Felicity was tasked with planting a bug that would show Helix every nook and cranny of Queen Consolidated's mainframe to use however they saw fit. Whatever that might look like to further the cause.

Things changed though when Oliver came into the picture, busting through every wall and facade Felicity had ever erected around her heart and made her question the very foundation of her life. All without ever even knowing what havoc he wreaked.

The predicament was only heightened when Cooper came calling for the information she'd collected on Queen Consolidated. Felicity hadn't been ready though, and had foolishly hesitated, unsure what she was doing but stalling for more time. At her persistence Cooper impatiently conceded, though as days turned to weeks he became increasingly suspicious of her involvement with Oliver. He'd demanded she send over whatever info she'd collected already and Felicity dragged her feet, working desperately for a plan to sabotage the mission.

However, Cooper had sensed the change in Felicity, and his responding change in tactics bad been so swift it made her question his loyalty from the beginning. The new threat was very real, the power of Helix binding her hands and tipping the control from her fingers.

The threat of doxing her on every platform connected to the internet. A threat that put new dangers on the forefront from angry enemies and government agencies alike.

It put her back against a bomb and a shaky finger on the trigger.

Felicity franticly tried to weigh her options, pushing Oliver away while planning her escape and still maintaining his innocence. Helix would not let this transgression pass. Felicity would know, because she never would either. Helix had been a ruthless force behind her, and with Coopers coup d'etat, she could only imagine what new horrors the organization was involved with.

A frantic plan was hatched, Felicity settling on fixing the biggest mistake she'd made first. She set to patching the network, working tirelessly on writing and re-writing codes and formulas, planting new information where the seedy secrets were nestled now. Unexplained holes were plugged and hard information was removed, encrypted and tucked away to analyze another day.

It was by God's saving grace alone that she had the plug installed the day Cooper called her bluff, exposing her like he'd threatened after an explosive conversation.

And with the whole world to see, her entire life was rightly turned upside down.

Felicity had packed her bags the second her name popped on the internet, knowing the local media would pluck it up like wild fire the second they connected the dots between her and Oliver.

She fled in a cowardice moment, not strong enough to see the betrayal on Oliver's face as she hightailed it out of his life forever.

The media had flocked to him, hounding him on his involvement with the infamous 'Overwatch' and Helix creator. Other government officials also took an interest in him, as Felicity knew they would, and subsequently subpoenaed any information in regards to her. They wanted answers, why was Overwatch working for Queen Consolidated? How did she go undetected for almost eight months? Why was Helix interested in QC? What exchanges happened—everything. And they took everything they could, combing with the finest comb for any decimal out of place.

With the CIA's mum assessment the public demands turned loud, furious questions hurled about from anything to charity, robbery, scares and even assassinations, the conspiracy theories racing online in droves. Angry accusations were hurled at the company, and a drop in Queen Consolidates' stock scared holders.

It was a grim time, but the silver lining was soon it would go away.

While the CIA still had their nose in QC Felicity knew it wouldn't last long, there was nothing to be found.

She'd made sure of that.

The spotlight on Oliver had cast a shadowed veil for her quick escape, and in the chaos of press and public fury Felicity was able to slip away undetected. Only one misstep away from capture, she evaded detection skillfully, unplugging strategically and taking the first chance and whatever road she could out of Starling.

In trying to protect Oliver she had still left a black mark on his reputation, the suspicion of deceit now fresh on the public's mind.

It burned worse knowing it would be a hot topic in his recently announced campaign for Mayor.

He could probably kiss those votes goodbye.

Any chance of redemption for Felicity was gone, and she knew this all while writing the plug for QC. She would happily sacrifice any semblance of happiness with Oliver to save him from her seedy life in the darkness.

It was a bitter pill to swallow, but one that brought her a small comfort.

Felicity had found activity in Queen Consolidated though, and she imagined the info was such that even Oliver wasn't privy to the contents.

Most of the nefarious workings had been done under his father, Robert Queen, before his untimely death in a boating accident. But the accident might not have been too accidental, and the digital print of Moira Queen was rimmed suspiciously deep along continued leaks and patterns that didn't fit at first glance.

Felicity had pulled all that info into a small drive she carried around with her now, tucked close to her body at all times. She had hurt Oliver in unimaginable ways, and leaving this information with him would only crush him further. She refused to allow him the burden of her mistakes.

He would continue to believe in his company, and Felicity would protect his secret by whatever means necessary.

She was smart enough to know that Oliver would probably never know what she had done for him.

Because of him.

If she had done her job properly he, nor anyone, would ever know, and Felicity would willingly carry the betrayal like a martyr to the grave. Continuing on in the only way she knew, hopeful for the day Oliver would have happiness with someone again.

Even if that happiness wasn't with her.

With her mind spiraling down darker paths Felicity was happy to see the familiar break in the tree line.

The dingy hotel unfolding around the corner was a less than reputable establishment, the paint faded from years of sun bleach and weather abuse, doors stained with discolored patches. Far from a night at the Hilton but it served it's purpose. As depressing as the space was, it was also discrete.

Her room was nothing spectacular, not much of a surprise, but it was all Felicity had for now. With four walls, a small bathroom, bed, and ample enough wifi, it was a temporary rest stop in her escape.

She'd already stayed too long, knew as much, and was still too close to the outskirts of Starling to feel comfortable.

The pay by the hour hotel had enough internet to navigate her next route carefully, staying off the grid however she needed to, carefully avoiding cyber detection.

Felicity knew she should have traveled further when she'd first set out, but she hadn't found the strength to distance herself so quickly.

She recognized now she'd already long overstayed, and wouldn't make that mistake again.

With a quick dash Felicity was across the bed, throwing over the sheets haphazardly in a quick make-up. She was getting on her knees to doublecheck beneath the bed when a light knocking sounded on her door.

Felicity froze, holding her breath and staring over the bed with wide eyes at the door, her only barrier from the unknown. With ice in her veins she willed whoever was on the other side to go away, thinking for the briefest moment she might have heard something in her paranoia.

It had only been a small sound.

The knock sounded again, the noise a soft tap, but the rapping a loud beacon.

The hotel had no windows to escape from, and it sounded like whoever was on the other side wasn't going to leave.

With no other escape there was only a head on approach to be had.

Slowly Felicity raised from the floor, tiptoeing cautiously to the peep hole.

She leaned forward, surprisingly steadier than she felt, while bracing the tips of her fingers against the door and squinting through the small hole. She couldn't see anyone on the other side and held her breath a moment longer, the pounding of her heart loud in her ears.

The silhouette of an arm reached out, rapping on the door again with the same light staccato, the vibrations running through her fingertips igniting a cold fear along her spine.

She didn't know what prompted her to do so, but her hand reached out, one grasping the door handle, the other pulling the short chain from the door slowly. With veins pumping in trepidation Felicity released the lock, holding the chain carefully so it wouldn't clatter against the frame.

The person on the other end must have been listening for the lock though, for the second the dead bolt clicked in its release She knew she no longer had the upper hand. The knob suddenly turned beneath her fingers, her whole body being shoved back and away, the door slamming closed as quickly as it had opened.

The breath knocked from her body as she was pinned suddenly to the wall behind her, a towering figure looming before her.

The daunting hulk of man was unidentifiable for but a second, the natural scent of him coupled with the sloping lines of muscles one she had become painfully familiar with; ones she never though she would lay eyes on again except through the lens and barriers of technology.

His sudden appearance brought forth all the conflicting emotions. Foreboding and longing joy rushed to the forefront, clogging her minds ability to calm her racing heart, a tight ball settling in her stomach.

It was a joy she didn't deserve to feel and suddenly the reality brought a crushing anxiety down on her shoulders.

"Oliver." She whispered into the still air, the name choking off silently.

His eyes burned her, the raw emotion and heated anger as clear as the clandestine blue.

The muscles in his body were tense, the set of his mouth a hard line. His rugged brow was furrowed, eyes tracing slowly along her shocked face, jaw clenched in tight fury.

The struggling play of emotions gave his uncertainty away, but Felicity didn't know what that would look like for her.

Was he here to have her arrested? To demand answers? Silence the problem for ruining him?

She would deserve it all.

No, Oliver would never hurt her. Felicity knew that. That still didn't explain why he was here though.

And here Oliver definitely was.

Her chest was only a heavy inhale away from touching his, her neck cranked to stare up into the angry blues baring down on her. Strong arms barred her escape, his massive limbs only a twitch away from hers. So painfully close, but ever careful not to touch.

The tension in the air was thick, and there was more than an ocean between them.

"Did you think you could just run away like that?" He demanded, his voice low and controlled.

Felicity swallowed softly. He was here for answers then. She'd planned what to say in the scenario of some distant future where he'd pry her for information. But it was always years from now, months even, not a week, a week of raw emotions and regretful memories.

Most of all though, Felicity was tired of lying.

She didn't want to lie to him anymore.

"How did you find me?" She asked softy, grateful her voice hadn't failed her.

"Diggle."

The one worded answer was oddly enough, and more than she expected in the first place. Felicity had suspected there was more to Diggle than what met the eye. The man loomed in the shadows as Oliver Queen 'personal security', but she knew better than that. Felicity had never been blind to the side looks and synchronicity that only came along working with someone. Not for them.

What right did she have to feel suspicious of Oliver though, she was the one who betrayed him.

His secrets could never compare to that.

Felicity didn't know what to say, there was so much, and nothing left. She had been stripped bare, every secret exposed for all the world to see. She had tried to clean up what Helix had leaked, but it was one thing to scrub a closed server and another to scrub the entire internet.

Oliver's eyes grew angrier at her silence, her reservation stinging.

"Do you have nothing to say?" He demanded, continuing before she could answer, the emotions building in his voice, "You think you can just come into my life and leave it like you did? And for what? What do you have to show for it?"

Every question was like a dagger straight to her heart.

"Was it just a sick joke? Trying to work your way up whatever ladder you're climbing?" He pushed away from her angrily, looking around the pitiful room with a sneer. The sudden distance made Felicity's head spin, his outburst paralyzing her legs.

Oliver standing here before her, speaking with such a harsh tone, was somehow more painful than ever imagining a life without him.

"It doesn't look like you've accomplished whatever game you had set out."

"It wasn't like that!" Felicity yelled, unable to contain her silence, the desperation for the truth rushing to the forefront. He could think poorly about her all he wanted, but it was never a game to her. Oliver was never a game.

"What was it like then?!" He demanded, rearing back into her orbit.

Felicity looked away, unable to see the harsh anger directed at her.

"It wasn't supposed to happen like that." She muttered, shame making her unable to lift her eyes to his.

"What wasn't supposed to happen? You stealing from my company? Lying to me? Deceiving me?"

The knot in her throat was almost too tight to breath around.

"Or making me feel something for you?" A hot flush of shame rushed through her body, "You were just using my emotions to get whatever you wanted out of me? Made me feel things to make a fool out of me?"

It was too much.

"No!" the yell tore from her throat before she could stop it, the rush of words tumbling from her lips. "That wasn't supposed to happen! I was only supposed to infiltrate Queen Consolidated, I wasn't supposed to even meet you!" She recalled the day he almost caught her breaching their system, the coincidental encounter changing the course of everything she'd set out to do.

Oliver didn't say anything, his eyes giving nothing away.

"I couldn't," her voice faded out, eyes finding the floor, "I couldn't go through with it."

An incredulous scoff sounded. "The media circus and agents knocking my door down make me think otherwise." Oliver spat out, coiling his body into himself and glaring down at her.

Guilt choked Felicity, her chest tightening at the reminder of what she'd created. "It was the only way to repair what I'd done."

There was a new question in his rugged stance.

"Repair what? What was Helix after?"

It felt less like a question and more like an interrogation. She would subject herself to this interrogation though. It was the only one she would.

"What did you give them?" Oliver asked quietly, the insinuation bulking her back up.

"I didn't give them anything!" Felicity defended hotly, unable to let him think that little of her. Her burst of anger lifted her eyes to clash with his, shocked to see not a flicker of emotion pass over his face.

Oliver stared at her blankly, almost as if looking through her. Felicity knew better though, a turbulent sea was behind those eyes.

"Then why did you run away?"

The question felt ridiculous in light of everything else going on and Felicity couldn't contain the sarcastic scoff. "Everyone from here to Thailand has my entire life at their fingertips, how could I stay?!"

It was true too, the dox Helix threatened had been very real, and Felicity knew that very real consequences would follow her actions.

When you're a child your dreams don't factor in repercussions.

Felicity's penance would not go unpaid. She had cheated, robbed, and distributed far more than could be overlooked. There was nothing in her bleak future that was promising.

Her life continuing on in the blanket of lies she had sewn.

The following silence was cold, Felicity staring Oliver down. Oliver, staring Felicity down.

She knew she didn't have the right to be angry, but she was, she was angry.

"Why didn't you tell me?" It was an earnest question from Oliver, desperate for the real answer, underlined with guarded distrust.

Looking up at the man before her, she realized just how deeply she had damaged something special, and it ached to come face to face with the crumbled ruins. Fissures of regret ran along her nerves, unbidden tears springing to her eyes.

Felicity had asked that question to herself more times than she could count.

Why hadn't she told him?

"I couldn't." She muttered shamefully, blinking her tears away.

In hindsight Felicity realized she probably could have, but that time had come and gone.

"What did you take?" Oliver asked mutely, the fight leaving his body while his stance stood rigged and closed off.

The question had her clutching the bag closer to her chest.

There was no way Oliver could've known she took anything, he wasn't as logistically literate as she was and doubted he knew her digital finger print. Even if he did, Felicity had made sure not to leave any trace behind.

"I didn't—,"

"What did you take Megan?" Oliver demanded, uncoiling from his post and taking a step into her personal space, knowingly using the wrong name.

Felicity stared up wide eyed, her inner turmoil waging a hard war.

"Why are you still lying to me?" Oliver asked softly, the first vestibule of pain from her betrayal seeping into his voice.

It was another stab to Felicity, wondering how much more she could put him through.

Oliver had always been a complicated man, and Felicity had seen through the layers and walls he put between himself and the world. It had been so easy for her to see the real man beneath the mask, which made her betrayal burn all the worse.

"There's nothing good down that path, you'll always be left looking for new pieces, analyzing everything. It shatters something." She finally warned, giving into the selfish desires to defend her little honor, to show him all she had actually done. Oliver wanted the information anyways, and who was she to withhold it from him. He already didn't trust her.

"More than it already is? Surely you've seen the news. Do you not see the pieces I'm currently picking up?"

Oh, she'd seen them and more, and she suspected Oliver knew as much.

Felicity clutched the weighted strap to her body, her knuckles wringing white, her heart kicking into her throat. She wanted to give Oliver this info even less than Helix.

Felicity heavily swallowed.

Once she did that there'd really no longer be any reason to see Oliver again.

The wash of emotions clogged her throat.

Was that why she'd really held onto it?

"Felicity." Oliver pleaded, her name on his tongue breaking her thoughts. The caress of syllables falling from Oliver's lips had her pulse jumping, the last layer of her resolve crumbling to ash. It felt as though he was looking at her for the first time. No more masks, no more deception.

Oliver Queen was looking at her; Felicity Smoak.

To hear the plea she could no longer hold back.

Wordlessly Felicity reached into the bag, going for the pocket she kept the USB drive secured and gathered it tightly to her palm.

This might not be the easy choice to make, but it finally felt like the right choice in a long line of wrongs. This was the exact reason Helix had been unsuccessful in its mission. Felicity had been doomed from the start, when Oliver had walked into her life and ignited an unimaginable spark to life.

Oliver had long since compromised Felicity.

He made her want to be a better person.

Made her want a better life. A life she could never have.

With a heavy heart and twisting stomach Felicity reached out slowly, handing the usb over gently to the quiet man. Oliver took it silently, staring at the small device with a brooding look.

"What's on here?" He questioned after a long moment.

"Those are the files I uncovered." Felicity quickly replied.

"What files?" Oliver snapped, impatience heating his tone.

"Files from QC's server," she replied ambiguously, not wanting to spill all the sordid details.

"But you didn't give it to them?" The tone was oddly accusatory, but Felicity didn't reply. Her deception was sitting as clear as day in his hand.

It was obvious by this point that she hadn't handed the files to Helix.

"What's on here?" Oliver asked again, the question less hostile than it had been a moment before, his voice holding a quiet reservation.

"Nothing good Oliver," Felicity sighed, steeling her back for the rush of information she was about to give him. "They're files detailing hedge funds and shell corporations Robert Queen created with Queen foundation funds. He'd set up Queen Consolidated to do his misgivings from the moment the first brick was laid. The list is long, but later he started working more under the books." Felicity told him clinically, watching the flash of emotion race across his face.

"What?" Oliver uttered in confusion, disbelief clouding his eyes.

"Robert Queen was funneling money into the criminal organization behind something call The Undertaking. Mr. Queen along with other Starling elites were involved in a rejuvenation initiative that…" Felicity trailed off, the truth of such a heinous plan still jarring to imagine. She didn't want to be the one to tell Oliver that.

Oliver turned away, rubbing a hand across his face and pacing forward a step, then two, his body a wide flank. Felicity had never seen someone master brooding so beautifully in her life, but the shift in demeanor had her nervous.

"Helix first uncovered The Undertaking three years ago." Felicity continued, seeing recognition light in Oliver's stance.

"Malcom Merlyn," he mumbled, recalling what'd happened to the man years prior.

No one knew where Malcom Merlyn was now, his disappearance a sudden one that was still unexplained, leaving behind a Fortune 500 company for his son Tommy to take control of.

"Helix used the info it had on Merlyn to get what they wanted. He fled town after realizing the full scope we had on him."

"They blackmailed him." Oliver realized.

"And extorted him." Felicity completed. "Helix runs under the delusion that they steal from the rich and give to the poor." Felicity knew first-hand how far that delusion ran, she had once drank the koolaid.

"My mother?" Oliver asked, and Felicity knew what the question was.

She couldn't bring herself to slander Moira Queen, but once Oliver read the disk, he'd know.

He shook his head, looking down at the innocuous device with a furrowed brow.

"They were blackmailing you?"

The question was unexpected and Felicity was surprised to feel so taken aback.

"…I created Helix, Oliver. I'm not a good person." She settled on, knowing that to be the final truth.

"I don't believe that." The retort was swift, and it brought Felicity a small comfort to know he didn't think she was the scum of earth like she currently felt.

"The federal agents would disagree with you." She bantered, aching at the familiar tone she could no longer take with him.

"You didn't give them this." Oliver told her, pulling Felicity from her quiet reserve and holding out the USB.

"I couldn't." Felicity confessed after a second.

Oliver curled his fingers around the drive. "Why?" He questioned, taking a step forward, creeping softly into her personal space.

"I was compromised." Felicity finally whispered, her voice hushed between the space.

"How?" Oliver probed, taking another step into her atmosphere, drawling her eyes up to his.

It was a loaded question, with such a simple answer, and the resulting rush of tears springing in her eyes had her swallowing thickly.

Felicity smiled a sad watery smile, her heart bared as raw as her soul.

"You."

Oliver's eyes slid from her eyes to the tear streaking along her face. Silently he leaned towards her slowly, pulling his free hand forward and ghosting his fingers along the slope of her dampened cheek.

His fingers scalded the skin it grazed. He was so close, the musk of his scent permeating Felicity's senses. Oliver created an uncanny euphoria in her world, making her dream new dreams. The near threats of Helix and other worldly dangers slipped away, the seductive sense of possibility like a drug to her deprived soul.

Felicity almost believed they could go back and explore what was blooming before them. Before it all shattered.

A car door slamming shut brought Felicity back to the preset with a sudden crash.

It didn't matter what was said now. There was a price on Felicity's head, and with Oliver kicking his campaign off to be Mayor there was no room in his life for reconciliation.

Felicity was a criminal.

Oliver Queen to be Mayor.

They could never be together.

She had ruined that for them.

Felicity reached up, taking Oliver's hand from her face and allowing herself a second to savor the heat from his body before dropping his hand and taking a step away.

"I'm so sorry, Oliver," she told him, seeing hollow dejection reflected back at her.

The air was suddenly suffocating and Felicity needed air. She needed space, a dark hole to lick her raw wounds in. She needed a clean break if she was to try and do anything with her future.

"Was any of it real?" Oliver asked, his face set, the lines firm.

Felicity couldn't prevent her hand from raising, allowing only her fingertips to graze the scruff stubble along Oliver's chin, her eyes following the trail of her fingers.

His hand came up, grasping her hands and pressing her fingers firmer into his cheek.

"Let me fix this." he pleaded, refusing to see what obstacles hindered them from ever being.

"You can't Oliver."

"I can. You can't slip in my life and leave it like this." Oliver was never the type of man who could be told he couldn't do something, and Felicity knew he'd come to realize their inevitable downfall in the future.

"I'm a criminal Oliver. What future could we possibly have? You're in the running to be Mayor. I'm in the running for an orange jumpsuit." She pleaded with him to understand, to not make this harder than it already was.

"I can fix this." He stubbornly persisted.

"You can't!" Felicity cried out, her emotions getting the best of her, the heat of his hands on her searing her.

"I have to try!" Oliver finally yelled, his grip on her hand crushing. "Why won't you let me try? Give me a chance, give us a chance Felicity."

"I'm so sorry Oliver," Felicity rushed, the tears she had been holding back finally spilling over. She couldn't stay in this spiral; it was breaking her heart into unrecognizable pieces.

"You have to destroy this," she pleaded, slipping her hand from his to grab the one clenching the drive. "Destroy it and make something great of your life. I patched QC, there's nothing on the servers that could incriminate you but this. You have to destroy it." She gasped out through tears, slipping past his form quickly. Felicity couldn't stay in this room any longer, she couldn't be this close to him right now, her will was crumbling, but there was nothing left for her to go back to. There was no escape from her punishment.

The tumultuous thoughts chased her to the door, the knob a lead weight under her hand.

Oliver didn't move from his position, staring blankly at the spot she'd just been, and Felicity couldn't bring herself to say goodbye, all words leaving her as she twisted the handle.

With a finality Felicity didn't feel she opened the door, pausing at the determined voice from behind her.

"Don't think this means I'm letting you go."

Felicity couldn't help but look back at the determined man. He was a sight to behold, and she would treasure this last moment just as tightly as she treasured the first.

"You have to." She whispered, turning with a casualty she didn't feel to run towards a future she didn't want.

His eyes burned into her turned back, the torrid mix of emotions ranging from anger to determination.

"I won't."

And Felicity could only wish he wouldn't.

Oliver pinched his nose, practicing the breathing techniques he'd learned years ago in a long forgotten place.

'Felicity.' He thought, his hand clenching at his side.

That woman had driven him insane from the first moment he'd laid eyes on her.

At first it was shock, Oliver hadn't realized the company had hired new employees in the tech department. He prided himself on knowing the inner workings of Queen Consolidated, it was how he'd carefully built his empire.

He and Diggle were in desperate need of tech support so Oliver had taken a chance on testing new potentials when suddenly she had been there.

Bright, happy and beautiful.

A ball of unattainable sunshine.

The sight of her had been a surprise, the sudden tilt of his axis had taken Oliver's breath away.

For a moment he'd seen happiness, happiness he hadn't seen in such a long time.

Oliver's mission was one he'd long since sworn his life to, the darkness caking his world an unimaginable concept to all but a few.

His father had shipped him off to boarding school at the rebellious age of fourteen.

Oliver wasn't there long though.

Meer months after his enrollment he was attacked along his path to the dorms by a group of masked men dressed like they were from some cheesy comic book. They plucked him from the only reality he'd ever known and dumped him in the slum of some mountains with people who were certifiably insane.

For five years Oliver was imprisoned, first by force, then with brainwashing. The League of Assassins they called themselves. Led by an iron fist and zero leniency, Oliver was beaten and berated into submission, their mission slowly unfolding before him. Over time they trained and perfect him for their tasks, grooming and readying him for wars to come.

The truth of Starling was uncovered methodically, the lewd and lascivious comings and goings a black mark on Oliver's view of his rose hued world.

The League had released Oliver back to his home finally, confident in their strong hold over him.

That had been their biggest mistake.

It had been jarring to return to the open arms of his mother and father. The kidnapping was never something talked about, the five-year gap glazed over in conversation as if it had never happened. Everyone walked around egg shells when he walked into a room. The incident kept under a tight hush, Moira long since paying the appropriate pockets to keep mouths closed and cameras off.

Life seemingly went on.

For Oliver it was different though. Always his senses were on heightened alert, ever waiting for orders from the League, ready for the next mission while pretending to be the whole boy his parents miraculously had back from madmen, and not the broken man he knew he was.

His nightmares kept him awake, his nerves ever on edge.

Oliver was a walking time bomb.

It wasn't until his mother hired a bodyguard, one John Diggle, when reality started to come back to Oliver. John was a steady hand and fresh perspective Oliver had long ago lost. He pushed him to question everything taught and ruthlessly ingrained in his mind from years of control under the League.

It was under this mentorship that Oliver learned what type of man he wanted to be.

He'd branched away swiftly at that point, creating his own space, a bunker, and learning his own ways in the dark of the night. He did this all while waking up to plaster a fake smile to his lips and buckle down to learn and explore the inner workings of Queen Consolidated.

It was a tumultuous time, but Oliver had learned to separate his lives flawlessly.

After his fathers death things changed.

A company suddenly without a head Oliver was thrust into the light like the sacrificial lamb. People rooted for his failure and it fueled his drive late into the evenings. The balance had to be re-established, but the new raise accompanying his elevated stature helped his nightly resources greatly.

The Billionaire Bachelor title gave Oliver surprising leniency for his time management in the company as well, the stigma a perfect cover.

And for years that's how it went.

The streets were safer, criminals had real enemies, and finally the playing field was evened.

Then she had just been there.

And when she'd smiled at him Oliver thought of something else, something beautiful for the first time in years.

The memory was still one of his favorites, and regardless of what name she had used, Oliver knew.

He knew she felt it too.

Oliver couldn't help but feel compelled by her, seeking her out accidentally for one reason or another, just to talk to her, to graze his hand along the slope of her elbow or see the bright shine of her eyes from behind her glasses.

He was so blinded by her that he glossed over the things he saw. Never connecting the dots or reading the cues.

John always said his softest spot was for those closest to him.

He just hadn't realized how close she already was.

She'd been acting off the last time Oliver had seen her, and he'd walked away with a sinking feeling that couldn't be shaken. He'd known something was off.

Oliver had been wrong though. So, so wrong.

After the initial explosion of information was released and the rush of lawyers flocked to his aid, the reality of what had been going on right below his nose burned like hot acid in his gut.

He couldn't believe Megan would do that, but then he'd learned her name wasn't even Megan, it was Felicity!

Felicity

Oliver tipped his hat to that of the fool, allowing a woman to slip past his shields so easily and shake the very foundation only to disappear into thin air like she never existed.

But Felicity had another thing coming if she thought she could run away that easily.

The phone in his back pocket started chiming in perfect timing to his musings, the caller one Oliver was waiting for.

He pulled the device to his ear, waiting only long enough to hear the line connect.

"Did it work?"

There was a brief pause, a few clicks ticking in the background a half second longer until, "It works," called out, the voice of John Diggle, "Ms. Smoak's GPS is pinging and ready to follow."

Oliver hung up at the confirmation, pulling an app open on his phone and seeing a bright blue bubble connect before darting along the map, traveling a consistent path away from town.

"It's not that easy anymore Felicity," he told the traveling dot, "Now you can hear what I have to say about all of this." Oliver pulled the small drive to his eye line, flipping it slowly in his fingers.

He didn't know what was on this disk, and didn't know if he was ready to see what it was. There had been enough upset in his life this past week. He knew eventually it'd be watched, but the beating of his heart gave him pause. There was no rush to look at the information now, his company was safe. QC's equipment had been returned after nothing had been seemingly found.

There was nothing to be found either. Felicity had cleaned his company so thoroughly that it was eerie, not a decimal was out of place. No one could disprove it. QC lawyers celebrated, but Oliver had felt cheated.

Cheated of the chance to explore different avenues, formulate a more effective plan. The haunting question and hot fury swirled with betrayal, made him want to demand answers.

Oliver was a stubborn man as well, and so he sought out his answers.

He'd found his response.

The very fact that Felicity had given him this drive was enough. Her truth brought the rush of memories and stolen moments to the forefront of his mind, the feeling still thrumming through his veins. His heart still strummed with the same feeling. She was still the same woman, and what they had shared, for how little they had together, Oliver knew it had been real.

The reveal of Felicity's deception and subsequent disappearance became a festering need for answers, and Oliver didn't try to resist the pull of following the spark that set his world on fire.

Felicity thought she knew the truth, and here they had both only been giving out half-truths. Two sides of the same coin, they were.

All of Oliver's feeling of betrayal and anger had fled with the drive in his hand. The realization that Felicity had betrayed her people to save him. As much as she might not see it Oliver could, and he fostered hope that they could find a way out of this.

There was always something that could be done.

That was a truth Oliver had learned in the beginning.

He felt a small tinge of guilt, wondering if things would have gotten so out of hand had he also been more revealing of his own misdeeds.

Oliver had his own connections, both lower than the Glades to higher than DC. Regardless of what Felicity might think, the Oliver Queen she imagined was faultless, a victim of a scheme, but blinded by his arms length hold on her, trying to keep her from his darkness. Oliver knew he was not a good man. He was not the man she painted in the moon, and for once in his bleak life, the more nefarious acquaintances of night could have helped, could possibly still help.

But that could never happen if Felicity kept insisting on running from all her problems.

"We're going to have a talk about that another day," he told the blue dot, letting her get some distance for now. There were still things Oliver had to wrap up at Queen Consolidated, along with Verdant, before he could dedicate himself to finding Felicity.

'I'm not letting you go that easy Felicity,' Oliver thought, sliding a pair of black gloves from his back pocket and over his hands, striding to his discreetly parked Ducati.

'It's about time our two worlds collide.'

Oliver couldn't help the small smirk from lifting his lip. The petty part of him hoped she was mad when she found out what he'd hidden from her.

It would return the favor.

'Later,' Oliver told himself, cranking the engine to life and pulling onto to pavement to quickly speed along the road to Starling. 'I'll read the documents later. Today is forward though.'

And for once Oliver was diving forward, towards a new goal, not looking back at the shambles from his past.