OH my Orli, I can't believe how lucky you guys are. I'm submitting to the obvious wishes of the public and giving the people what they want ... more stories about me!

So like I was clicking through my e-mail and there were all these messages from random people saying how strongly they felt about "Passionate Adventures." I was so stunned. But then one day Mr. Henderson jerked my hair really hard and messed it up, and I remembered that I'd written a fanfiction thingy. I'd forgotten all about it, so you can imagine how surprised and flattered I was to hear that legions of people the world over worshipped me. I mean there are actually complete strangers who think I am a hackneyed abomination! ME! And I never took a writing class in my life!

Anyhow. Here's another fabulous addition to the "You!/CannonCharacter" genre of fanfiction. Another adventure of me! Crossover with Pirates of the Caribbean!

Harry Potter and the Majestic Princess Muggle-born Wandless Magic Using Animagus Princess Granddaughter of Merlin and Ravenclaw Princess ME!

By ME

PLOP! Severe Snape fell down three flights of stairs in front of the whole school.

"WEASELS!" he screamed greasily, pointing his wand at the two red headed twins who were making out in a corner.

"What?" said Fred, looking around in a daze.

"Six million points from Griffendore!" Snape screamed, then continued on his way to the basement.

The Weasley twins started to look around, wondering what had happened. Oliver Wood came over and smacked their heads saying thanks for ruining their house's chance at the cup. Harry Potter ran in the front door out of nowhere with his scar bleeding and announced that Volemart was coming to kill them all and Dumbledoor was dead!!!!!

Hermione ran over and tried to kiss him, saying it was now or never, but he backhanded her and threw her to the ground. "I don't want to kiss you!" He screamed. "I'm saving myself for my true love!"

"Who is your true love?" Asked Cho hopefully, licking her lips and looking evil. Ginny Weasel patted her hair.

"I don't know," he began, "I've never...." But he trailed off because I chose that moment to come forward. "Hi," I said meekly, but everyone got really quiet at the sound of my musical hummingbird voice. It was so beautiful that Percy got a tear in his eye and for a minute no one noticed how stunning the rest of me was. I had these super long legs and really big boobs and violet eyes that turn silver at night and alabaster skin and perfect lips and hair that was silver with pink strands that curled in waves like the ocean and fell all the way to my feet.

"I'm sorry." I whispered, looking down through my long curly eyelashes. "It's all my fault!"

"No it's not!" Shouted Harry, walking over and taking my hands gently. "Don't be so hard on yourself. You're not to blame."

"Yes I am!" I wept into his shoulder. Oliver Harry Ron Draco Sirius the twins and Johnny Depp all started to tear up in sympathy. "I made Snape fall down the stairs!"

"WHAT?!" Asked everyone, all confused because I didn't have a wand. "How could that be?"

I explained that I didn't get a wand yet cause I was Muggle born and my family wouldn't let me come to hogwarts cause I was a princess and they needed me to rule Bolivia. I ran away from home because I'm spirited and independent, but I didn't have any wizard money to buy books and supplies. Harry dried my tears and told me he'd give me all his money.

The Weasels asked me to marry them because they'd never made Snape fall down a whole flight of stairs in front of everyone. Everyone started to laugh and Harry put an arm around me, so we went for breakfast. But Draco stopped us and pushed Harry back.

"Dumbledoor is dead!" He shouted, arrogantly with a smirk. "So there isn't a sorting hat. I think she should be Slytherin, since she was sneaky enough to get Snape, even!"

Harry pushed Draco back. She's a Griffendoor! He screamed, getting out his wand. Jack Sparrow, who was the Hufflepuff head boy and quidditch CAPTAIN (LOLOLOL) and Seeker announced that I was a Hufflepuff and he'd prove it, then he grabbed me roughly and started kissing me and running his hands through my hair and down my back and then he picked me up and started to carry me upstairs like in Gone With the Wind, but all of a sudden there was a flash of light and a beautiful smart wise ghost was standing in the way.

"STOP!" yelled the ghost of Rowena Ravenclaw.

"Bitch." I muttered, but no one heard.

She told everyone to stop fighting because I was a Ravenclaw anyway. I was her great grandchild from her daughter with Merlin and that's why I had special powers like animagus and wandless magic and eternal youth and beauty.

She also said that Harry was Griffendoor's heir and we were destined to get married. All the boys were really mad except Harry, and Jack clutched me ever tighter. I didn't know what to do! I loved Jack, but Harry and I were meant to be, and Wood was really cute too! I wished life was simple and I could just be a princess again.

I knew my duty was to the wizarding world, though, and if Harry broke his heart over me he'd never be able to fight Voldemort. So I selflessly put my own feelings aside and kissed Jack one more time with only a little tongue and then told him to put me down. I walked over to Harry and told him I'd marry him, and then all the girls and guys started to cry because they wanted to marry us. Harry floated in the air and said he felt stronger than ever so he ran out the front door to confront Voldemort.

"About time, Potty!" Yelled Voldemort, cause he was Peeves the whole time!!!!

Harry wasted no time and pulled out his wand. It didn't work against Voldemort, though, so he walked over and punched him and they started fighting and fighting and then finally they rolled over a cliff onto some really sharp rocks and both died.

"Nooooooo! Harry!" I screamed, falling to my knees, inconsolable. "I'm a widow now," I whispered.

"Not for long, darling," said Jack in my ear. "We've got a second chance and I'm not going to lose you again!"

"Oh Jack," I cried and we started making out.

And then we were crowned king and queen of Bolivia and the wizard world because Jack was the heir to Hufflepuff and the Slytherin and Gryffindoor heirs were dead now.

THE END!