Monday was when the nightmares started. Steven normally didn't have nightmares. He had pretty great dreams sometimes, or just really long bouts of nothingness. But never nightmares. Or, never nightmares like this.
It had been two weeks since Pearl regenerated and for some reason Steven couldn't stop replaying her death in his mind. It happened right in front of him, with no warning. She was there one second, lecturing him with a smile on her face, and then…
Steven woke with a yell, panting and sweating with his arm outstretched. He clenched his fist a few times. He was reaching for something, he was reaching for her. He sighed and rubbed his eyes. It was a dream. It was just a dream.
"Steven!"
Like clockwork, she was there. Tall and graceful in her new form, spear out, a look of worry on her face.
Pearl was in one piece.
She fell into a fighting stance. "Are you alright? Did you see something?"
That was quick, even for Pearl. He raised an eyebrow at her. "Pearl, how did you get here so fast?"
The question seemed to knock her off guard. He watched her drop her stance and look awkwardly to the side. "Well, um. Garnet…told me that you uh…were in trouble. So I came straight here to see if there was a…monster."
He wasn't buying it, but he'd humor her. "Diiiiiid Garnet tell you that there was no monster?"
She looked at him blankly and deactivated her spear. "No. No she did not."
He chuckled. Pearl was always quick to jump to conclusions and quick to react. She was probably lying about Garnet, but she'd tell him when she was ready, and he'd wait for her, just like he waited for her to regenerate.
"It's okay Pearl, it was just a bad dream." He reassured her, rubbing his eyes again and yawning "I'm fine, really."
"Well, okay. If you say so. But if you need anything, I won't be far."
"I know."
He watched her walk down the stairs before yelling back to her.
"Pearl?!"
Not even a millisecond had passed before he saw the top of her head again. "Yes? What is it?"
"I just…wanted to say thanks. For being here."
She smiled at him. "I'll always be here for you Steven."
He tried to burn her smile into his eyelids when he closed them.
It was Thursday and he didn't sleep last night. Every time he closed his eyes Pearl's 'death' kept replaying itself over and over again. And the waiting got worse. He always felt like he was waiting, but for nothing. Pearl was there, she was whole again, he'd seen her every day for the past four days and he knew she was there. A part of him still felt like he was really waiting for her to come back.
It was when Garnet took him aside that he realized it was becoming a problem.
"You haven't been sleeping." She had mentioned offhandedly during lunch. She didn't eat, but Steven did, and he wanted to eat with her. He stared down at the grilled cheese sandwich on his plate and picked a slice up, taking a bite.
"How could you tell?"
"You have bags under your eyes."
He sighed, swallowing. "It's…complicated. It's kind of hard."
"You've been having nightmares too."
"Mhhhhnnnnnn." He whined and took another bite. Garnet continued.
"Steven, if you're having trouble with something, talk to us. We can help you."
"I wanna talk to you about it. I wanna talk to you and Amethyst and Pearl about it but…but it's just…." He put the sandwich down and put his head in his arms, leaning on the countertop.
"You're still troubled by what happened two weeks ago."
He nodded "I keep seeing her…whenever I close my eyes I can her the poof all over again. I've never seen that happen to any of you before. I was scared."
"There's no need to be afraid, Steven." She reassured him, putting a hand on his shoulder. "Gem regeneration is a normal thing. Amethyst has regenerated one hundred and seventy five times already. It's nothing to be afraid of."
"I know, but…"
"Have you tried talking about it with Pearl?"
"No. I don't want her to worry about me." He picked up the half-eaten slice and put the rest in his mouth, swallowing it. "She worries about me a lot already. I don't wanna make her worry more."
"Steven, we all worry about you. We worry about you because we love you, and we want to help you." She stood up. "You should talk to Pearl about this. She'd want to know."
"Yeah….yeah you're right. Why are you so good at being right all the time?"
"It's a gift." She started towards the warp pad. "She'll be out of her room in eleven minutes. Good luck."
"Where are you going?"
"I have something I need to find and break."
He nodded and took a bite of his second slice. "Bring me back something!"
And with a warp and a nod, she was gone.
He waited right outside her door for her, legs crossed pretzel style in front of the warp pad. She jumped when she saw him.
"Oh, Steven. Is something the matter?"
He stood up, donning his Serious Steven face. "Pearl, we need to have a talk. Preferably in the living room surrounded by couch cushions."
"O…kay." She raised an eyebrow at him and followed him the seven feet to the couch, sitting down next to him. "Steven, what's this about."
He hugged her.
He hugged her tightly as she sat awkwardly holding her hands out, before bringing them around him in worry. "Steven, is everything alright?"
"Promise me you won't leave me."
She blinked. "Pardon?"
"Promise me you won't go anywhere and leave me alone again." He looked up at her, eyes pooling with tears. "When you went into your gem, I didn't know what to do. I was so afraid you were going to leave me alone. And I keep having nightmares of you dying and they won't stop."
She pet his back as he cried into her shirt. "I had no idea you were still so upset over my regeneration. Steven, of course I'm not going to leave you. I'll always be here for you, as long as you need me."
He sniffled and let go of her. "Well, I need you forever. I need all of you forever. Promise me you won't go away again."
"Well, technically, if something were to happen to me in the future that warranted another gem regeneration, at that point there'd probably be-" She stopped when she saw his face go from sadness to fear. "…I promise I won't let it happen again."
He smiled and hugger her tighter. It was exactly what he needed to hear.
"Good."
