Darkness. That all I see. I'm falling. Just falling.
Where im falling to im not sure i wanna know. i think i'm falling down, but i may b falling up or sideways. I'm not sure which way is where anymore. I'm only sure of darkness. I'm afraid of opening my eyes. I know ill see the faces again. The faces of those ive lost. Suddenly i hit the ground hard. Its strange but familiar. I slowly get up and look around to see stars. Endless stars. My favorite thing in the world, or the universe I guess. Then the scenes start to replay. When I met him, when we played and laughed, when he held me and i held him, when we fought and cried together, when he left me.. without a goodbye.. without a trace..
All of a sudden he is in front of me and i fall to my knees crying.
" How could you, you bastard! You left me! i needed you! i loved you! goddamnit! you never even said goodbye! you just left me like we didn't mean a thing! Did we? Huh? obviously not if you could just up and leave me like that and not even tell me! And as suddenly as he came he just disappeared. Then, as if that wasn't enough, another man appears. The man i loved that used me. I simply stare and try to breathe for im at a loss of words. My chest feels like it may explode. I gave him my everything.. my first kiss, my first relationship, my first love, all my trust.. He stomped on it and threw it back at me and left for my "best friend" another person i cared about and trusted. He walks up to me and repeats the last words he said to me: " Your just a useless bitch who never should have been born." and I cry silently. He slaps me hard but I know the only paini feel is in my heart. Then he walks up to my ex friend and they disappear together yet again.
The final person is one I do not know but at the same time I do. He has followed me and watching me. I could sense it.
"who the hell are you and what the fuck do you want with me!?"
"Annabelle,, dear annabelle.. Youll know everything soon. Itll all become obvious to your stupid mind." Then he slaps me so hard i hit the ground. But this pain is different.. It isnt emotional its physical and that just makes me more scared of him. My lip begins to bleed. He grabs my hair and pulls me toward him.
: I will have exactly what i want you little bitch. Ill get it one way or the other. Ill kill everyone you love to get it if i have to. Prepare for misery and hell."
And i wake up. There are tears streaming down my face as usual. But this time I notice blood as well. I feel my lip and it stings and i feel slightly fearful. I get up and splash my face with water and get into a shower. Its the one place i feel peaceful and relaxed. I sometimes wish i had someone to hold me and say its ok after these dreams but then i remember that that would only make it worse. You cant rust anyone it only brings more pain and i dont need that right now. I let the cool water wash away the blood and sweat and tears from my dream.
"Time to smile annabelle" I say quietly to myself as i do every morning.
I walk out of the bathroom after getting dressed and see my dad asleep in his workplace again. I kiss his head and get my things to go back to demicamp. All of a sudden I get a chill.. Like something bad would happen.. I get them a lot but that doesn't mean they dont scare me every time.
