WTH
Everyone has those moments; those moments when you let go and think to yourself, 'What the heck, I'll just go with this'. These are Kensi's life-changing, 'WTH' moments. CaKe one-shot. Not part of SWBI.
The first time Kensi decides to just go with it, she finds herself kissing her boss. Callen, not Hetty.
This was a bad idea, Kensi chides herself, forcing her eyes to focus on her paperwork and not stray towards her blue-eyed companion who is currently preoccupied by his own paperwork.
No kidding, Sherlock. Kensi tries to conceal a frown. She knows that staying back is probably one of the worst things she could be doing right now, seeing as how things between her and Callen have just gotten progressively worse. But Hetty wants her paperwork turned in by the next morning, and what Hetty wants Hetty gets. Even if it means having to bear through the awkward silence between the two of them.
Kensi sneaks a glance at her watch, trying to be subtle. She decides it's an acceptably late hour, and after all, this won't be the first time she takes home her paperwork to do in front of the TV. She gathers her things, stacks the forms in a neat pile and gets up, stretching her sore limbs.
"Well, that's it," She says brightly, pasting on a fake grin. Callen probably sees right through it, but it's the thought that counts, right? "I'm outta here! See you tomorrow!"
"Yeah," He says gruffly, sparing her a short glance. "Good night, Kenz."
She nods and picks up her bag and the forms, stuffing them into a folder. Picking out her car keys from all the other keys, she keeps her head held high and walks past her boss, still unsure of what exactly is going on between them. Whatever it is, it has Callen keeping her from going undercover on romantic assignments and getting jealous whenever she shows up after a date.
And Kensi isn't blind; she knows that Callen's jealousy isn't entirely unreasonable. But what they're feeling for each other? It has to go. And though it might really hurt them to ignore their feelings, that's exactly what Kensi plans to do.
Up until the moment Callen reaches out for her, his hand on her arm, pulling her back. "Kenz, this isn't working." He says tiredly. And she's tired too, truth be told, because damn it, fighting this is harder than she thought it would be.
"I know," She sighs. But this is the only way. Our hands are tied, she feels like saying. Except she won't, because that's just how it is, and this is such an obvious fact she doesn't need to state it.
"Kenz," He calls to her, standing up, pulling her in. "Stop thinking." He smirks, his bright eyes lighting up. As he moves in to close the distance between them, her thoughts are all over the place, ranging from God, he looks good to Shit, Hetty might still be here.
But then he repeats his words and her mind clears of its own accord. Because for the first time, Kensi Blye has decided to let go of everything, thinking to herself, What the heck, I owe this to us.
And that is how she finds herself kissing her boss.
Callen, not Hetty.
The second time Kensi decides to just go with it, she finds herself on a date. A second date.
"By the end of tonight, when you're all irritated with me, just remember that I told you so." Kensi mutters, her smile in place. In truth, she's all happy and warm and gooey inside, because somehow Callen has a way of making her feel like a giant, fresh donut with jam inside, but still, it's a second date. With Callen. And she can't afford to screw this up, because she really likes him. Okay, more than likes him, but let's not go into that right now.
"And by the end of tonight, when we somehow end up on your couch making out like a couple of horny teens, just remember that I told you so." Callen retorts, leading her towards an empty table. He pulls out the seat for her and she smiles, because it's just so amusing to see Callen away from work.
"Someone's a little too confident. What if I get a horrible headache and have to go home?" She challenges, scanning through the menu.
"Then we'll just replace the making out part with Aspirin and a movie." He shrugs, picking up his menu.
"You know we might get called in any moment." Kensi teases, throwing him another challenge. It's nothing out of the ordinary; their banter is one of the few things they've never needed to control. But the intimate setting and their current situation makes for an entirely different mood.
"Are you trying to jinx this date?" Callen smirks, though he quickly replaces it with a polite smile when the waitress comes to take their order. A few moments after she's left, Kensi speaks up.
"I don't know. Think I could get away with it?" Callen sees right through her. He gently reaches for one of her hands, giving her a soft squeeze.
"Kenz," He makes eye contact with her, dropping his tone to a whisper. "We're having fun, right? There's nothing to worry about. It's me." Kensi nods, slightly comforted.
"Besides, this isn't even our second date." Callen grins, earning him a puzzled look.
"First date was when we went to that bar. This is the third. Three guesses for our second date."
"Oh no," Kensi says after a moment's thought. "That so doesn't count. It was take-out, G! We do that all the time. I wasn't even thinking about that." Actually, she was thinking. Something along the lines of, Oh, what the heck, it's been a long day and I could use the company.
"Hmm," He hums in agreement. "But we don't usually do this." He leans over and presses his lips to hers.
And that is how she finds herself on a third date, having unknowingly gone through a second one, no doubt part of Callen's plan to make her comfortable.
That night, they did end up on the couch, and no, there wasn't any Aspirin involved.
The third time Kensi decides to just go with it, she finds herself in big trouble.
Kensi pulls away from her boyfriend of 4 months and also her superior, G Callen. "I think that was the doorbell." She murmurs alertly. "Did you order anything?"
"No." Callen says, confused. "Think it's Sam?"
Kensi's eyes grow wide at this possibility. They haven't shared their little secret with anyone from the team yet, not even Sam. Though they're pretty convinced Hetty knows; after all, she knows everything. "Oh shit," Kensi gets up, straightening out her clothes. "How do I look?" She asks, hoping for any answer other than the one she knows Callen is about to give her.
"Like you've just had the best sex ever." He grins.
"Oh great," She says sarcastically, rolling her eyes. "Thanks for that. Sam's probably going to figure that out immediately." Her phone lights up on the nightstand as a worried Sam calls. She quickly snatches it up.
"You, stay here and stay quiet." She orders, walking out of her bedroom as she picks up Sam's call. "Hey, Sam! Hold on, I was just picking up a few things, couldn't hear you."
She walks out and quickly throws her hair up in a loose bun, hoping to avoid a case of sex hair, pulling open her door. "Hey!" She greets brightly, moving aside to let him in. "Everything alright?"
She trails after Sam into the living room, quickly kicking a stray article of clothing under her couch. Sam must be quite preoccupied, since he – thankfully – misses her quick movement.
"Sam? What's wrong?" She asks after a moment's silence, prompting her friend to turn around and face her.
"Have you seen G? I tried to call him a couple times."
Oh, shit. Too late, Kensi recalls the insistent ringing of G's phone, consistently ignored by the busy couple.
"Callen? I think he said he was gonna drop by soon, pass me a couple of things." She lies nonchalantly, hoping to reassure Sam that his friend is very much alright and safe.
"Oh." Sam says, relieved. "I was just…you know." Kensi nods; it isn't unusual for them to keep tabs on each other at all times, especially after Dom. A small pang of guilt hits her; they have been neglecting their friend recently, thanks to their new relationship. It's a miracle Sam hasn't figured anything out yet.
"Why don't you sit down? I'll get us something to drink." She knows as she's saying this that it's a bad idea, but what the heck, Callen can wait in there for a while longer, and she really does feel guilty for how they've been treating Sam.
She pulls out a couple of beers from the fridge and makes her way back to the living room. Noting the small device in Sam's hand pressed against his ear, she stops in her tracks. "Sam, I don't think-" Her efforts are too late.
Behind a door, the muffled sound of Callen's phone rings out.
And that is how Callen ended up sheepishly walking out of her room, doing the walk of shame, while she kept tabs on Sam's reaction, the only thought in her mind somewhere along the lines of This is going to be interesting.
On the plus side, Callen ended up moving in with her after that debacle.
The fourth time Kensi decides to just go with it, she finds herself engaged. To marry.
It's been a year since that awkward night in the office, and tonight Callen is bringing her out…somewhere. Kensi doesn't really mind, so long as they don't end up stranded somewhere like the last time they'd planned a weekend getaway, but after a while she finds herself getting impatient.
"G, where are we going?" She asks, shooting him a look. "And if you say somewhere or it's a surprise, I will scream bloody murder." She threatens. Callen chuckles.
"I'd say, Patience, Kenz, but somehow I don't think you'd like that either."
"Damn right I wouldn't." She mutters. He moves one hand away from the steering wheel to grasp hers.
"We're almost there, Kenz." He says softly, smiling. "Just a few more minutes."
True to his word, a few minutes later they pull up to a road next to the nicest beach she's ever seen in L.A. Her breath catches in her throat for a moment, not just because this is really sweet and unexpected of Callen, but also because she knows that you don't drive your girlfriend to a secluded beach the day of your one-year anniversary. She contemplates briefly the option of speaking up, but decides to just let this play out, because every single time she's gone with the flow, nothing but good things have happened to her.
And so she lets him lead her to the beach, where she finds a small picnic, amongst other things. She lets him dominate the conversation, listening for clues. She lets him pull her up to dance along to the symphony of the waves, crashing and lapping against the shore. Eventually, she lets him set her down, lets him go down on one knee as her hands fly to her mouth in surprise, because even though this is what she's suspected, she hadn't even dared to believe herself, because hello, marriage and G Callen? Not a likely option.
And when he asks her to spend the rest of her live next to him, because that's exactly what he plans on doing, she allows all thoughts to leave her mind, except one: What the heck, I'm going with this.
And that is how Kensi finds herself engaged. To marry. G Callen.
And you can bet that this is going to be interesting.
The fifth time Kensi decides to just go with it, what she finds out changes her life…forever.
Five minutes.
Five minutes before she knows her future; their future. Because in all her panic, she'd forgotten that this involves not only her, but also her husband and their friends. Because it's a child they're talking about, not just a temp they can send back after a week, and also, it's a child someone could use against all of them, and weaknesses are not tolerated amongst the team. It's just the way things work.
But as she sits down for those five minutes, contemplating a child, the positive side starts to entice her. An image of a child – a girl, because…well, she's seeing a girl – with his eyes and her hair, tan and charming, yet a resilient little thing, because between the two of them, any child they have is guaranteed to be strong and tough and all the things a mother should wish for her child, things and traits that allow them to go through life unscathed.
As she stands in a corner, leaning against the cool tiles of their bathroom for five agonizing minutes, her mind shifts between images of a young girl alive and giggling and happy, and those of a small child, pale and terrified, a pawn against her parents. It's unsettling, and for a moment she almost wishes that she can will the results to be negative, if only to protect the little girl she's seeing.
A glance at her watch lets her know that her time is up; five minutes have gone by and it's now time to check her future. Undecided, Kensi Blye-Callen realizes for the very first time in her life that she really, truly has no idea of what she wants. It's not just another decision you make without thought every day; salad or soup, black or white, pregnant or not.
But it's also not a decision that requires endless thought; days and days of distraction, worries and endless what-ifs. Should she, or should she not be pregnant? Does she, or does she not want to be pregnant?
Seven minutes have passed, and that small, pen-like object remains on the counter, untouched by Kensi's worries, yet the answer to all of her questions. Frustrated, Kensi straightens up her back and crosses her arms. "Enough." She mutters out loud, having concluded that there is really only one way to solve this.
To just go through with it. To think what the heck and really mean it, really just throw everything out and go with the flow, go pick up that little stick and find out her future.
And so she does walk over and pick up the stick and find out her future. She strides to the counter, picks up the offensive object and forces open her (oddly) tightly-shut eyes.
And smiles.
Yes, the ending is somewhat open. I didn't want to break the pattern of my last sentences, but really, this is the only way I could end this fic. Pregnant or not pregnant, figure it out yourselves. But really, if it was me and I was torn between wanting a child and not wanting a child, I would just remain cool if the results turned out negative. I certainly wouldn't smile. But then again, that's just me.
Okay, so that was it, my last CaKe one-shot for the next couple of months.
Why? Because my new CaKe fic will be up soon! Yes, the 1st of May is upon us! This is so exciting! Alright folks, for more deets, head on over to my Twitter and website, both of which you can find on my profile, where I've already posted vital deets such as the TITLE and the SUMMARY! Yes, this is SO exciting! And the only question that remains is…
R U READY?
As always, feel free to review or PM me. I've already made a new friend, LostForeverInHisEyes, who wrote the best Callen/OC/Kensi fic I've ever read. Seriously. Check it out : Letting Go. GO! CHECK IT OUT! THAT'S AN ORDER!
Or not. It's up to you.
E Salvatore,
April 2011.
