The boys, Zack and Cody, had just left for school, which left Carey at home alone. Time to get out the vodka, she thought to herself. She stepped over to the pantry and reached way in the back of it for her hidden stash. It had now become a nasty habit that she was sure her boys did not notice. She uncapped the bottle and took a large swig.

It all started when Moseby had a serious talk with her about her boys' behavior problems. He had told her that if she failed to control them better, they would all be kicked out of the hotel. She tried explaining to her two 12-year-olds the seriousness of what was said to her, but it seemed that their attention was held elsewhere. Needless to say, they got into more trouble for putting a bag of frogs into the kitchen, on a very important night when the hotel inspector was supposed to arrive. Moseby was furious. She was furious. She begged him to allow her to stay. She would fix it. She would. She grounded them. This lasted, oh I dunno, a day and a half until they snuck out only to get into trouble again. This time they broke the television set in the lobby, when they were playing football.

It wasn't one of those old T.V's either. It was an expensive flat screen high definition T.V. She did not have enough money to pay for it in full. Or at all, really. Again, she begged Moseby to let her stay. She didn't have anywhere else to go! How could he kick out a single mother with twins? She played with his emotions successfully, however, she wasn't going to be able to do this forever. She convinced him to let her stay, but she had to pay for the television through her paycheck. It would be at least 5 months for her to finish paying it off. She didn't know if she could do it. Apart from that, her boys also had a habit of ordering room service, even though she constantly told them they were not allowed. They really needed to start listening better.

She had always heard about how drinking was supposed to make you feel better. It was supposed to make you feel relaxed, take away all the stress and anger. She decided to give it a try. One night while her boys were at a friends house, she stalked off to the bar. She only intended on having one, maybe two. The more she drank, the better she felt. It was such a good feeling that she couldn't stop. She stayed there until she was the last person in the building and got kicked out because they were closing. She was wasted.

Upon stumbling inside her suite at 3 in the morning, she was shocked to find her twins on the couch staring at her. "Mom, where have you been?" she heard her youngest ask of her softly. She pointed an accusing finger at them. "What are YOU two doing out of bed? Get in bed! Now!" she yelled at them both. They remained on the couch staring at her. She stumbled over to them, nearly falling on top of them. She was sick of their defiant attitude. "Are you ok, Mom?" Zack parroted his brother's tone. She grabbed him by the arm, pulling him up. "Why don't you ever listen to me!" She screamed at him, shaking him. Zack's eyes grew wide as his mother continued to shake him. "Mom, what's going—" SLAP! She had just slapped her son in the face. She let go of his arm and dropped him onto the couch. His eyes formed instant tears as he furiously rubbed his cheek where it was slapped. He remained still and silent, watching his mom with fear now in his eyes. Cody did the same. She raised her hand at her youngest, yelling, "GET! GET IN BED NOW!" Zack got up quickly, with Cody following close behind. When they were in their rooms, she unfolded the couch bed and collapsed onto it in despair.

What had she done? She just did something that she swore she would never ever do to her kids. She hit her oldest. She would never forget the look he gave her after he fell back onto the couch. After all, he hadn't done anything to deserve being smacked. He just wanted to know if she was ok, and she awarded him with a slap across the face. She cried into her pillow until she fell fast asleep.

The next morning she awoke with a hang over. She slowly got up and made her way to the kitchen. Man, did she have a bad headache. She got out 3 bowls and began pouring cereal into each one. She placed each bowl at the table. "Boys!" she called, trying to sound cheerful, which was hard to do considering how bad she felt. Two 12 year olds hesitantly opened their bedroom door and made their way over to her. They remained silent and stared at the floor as they sat down. Carey was instantly reminded of last night when she saw Zack's face. It seemed there was a permanent red spot on his cheek where she had slapped him. She didn't know that she slapped him so hard. There was also a scratch that stretched from the side of his nose almost to his ear. It must have been made by her fingernails. She walked over to him, and lifted her hand up to his cheek. He instantly jerked away, and his eyes watered up as he looked up at his mom. Carey let her hand fall down in the realization that her son was afraid of her. She really screwed up big time. "Baby I am so sorry." She said to her oldest quietly. She pulled up a chair, sitting on it, and wrapped her arms around him, pulling him in for a hug. Although he didn't resist he didn't exactly jump into her arms either. He simply let her do whatever she wanted to him. Zack remained silent as his mom kept repeating that she was sorry to him. She turned his head so she could get a good look at his cheek. When she ran her hand across it he flinched from the touch. "Are you ok honey?" she asked her non-responsive son. Finally he mumbled yes quietly and that was the last thing he said to her at breakfast. Cody on the other hand didn't say anything at all all morning except when the twins walked out the door and they both told their mom they loved her after her telling them that she loved them, eyeing Zack especially, when she said this.

This happened about a month ago. Here she was, still drinking. She was progressing down a steep hill of alcoholism, some place that she desperately needed to get off of. Not only was her performance in work dropping significantly, but also her normal loving mother attitude was almost completely gone. Sure she had her moments where she was still loving, and caring. But now more often than not, she seemed to be a heartless child abuser who didn't care about hurting her kids.

She continued to think about all of this and more as she collapsed onto the couch in a drunken haze and gulped down her fifth bottle of corona beer. It wasn't even the afternoon yet, and she had hours before her sons returned home.