This is WAY too short, but when I read it through it seemed to just fit, as short as it is. Yeah.. Two paragraphs, and I'm skanking this as an update!

They don't know me like they think they do. Nobody does. All they see is the façade I've put in place. I've spent years building these walls around me, they act as a safety net, protecting me from the pain life seems intent on serving me. But it can't hurt me if it doesn't know me, right? That was the theory, when I realised that the world was no longer a nice place, and that life wasn't a gift. I don't value life, and I don't find it sacred. How could I, somebody who has to take it away, someone who blatantly throws the gift back in Gods face? I used to dream of making something of myself, I would not be another statistic in the Army, I'd be different, I would make a difference. My enthusiasm and dedication to my work paid off, but it wasn't the pay off I had been waiting for, working for. It wasn't what I had expected and I felt betrayed.

I want to go back to a time when I was just one among many. Now I stand out, alone, with the power to save and take life through the strength of a single bullet. It isn't what I thought it would be, it lied, but still my loyalty to my country will not waver. I'm cursed. Stuck in this world, this place I no longer want to be a part of. But its all I have, so how can I just turn away and leave? Its simple - I can't. I'm trapped. Ruled by this lifestyle that I know I'll never leave. For the hatred of my sins, my blasphemous ability to kill and hurt others is all that's real about me, it's the only true thing I know about myself. For the walls built around me are strong, and not only do they protect me from this world, they protect me from myself.

Review please :D