These Five Things fics are kind of addicting, you know. This one is for my favorite couple ever, Izumi x Meroko. All of it takes place before the beginning of the manga, and there are spoilers for a couple of bonus chapters. (Translation: If you haven't read the tankobon, too bad for you.)


1.

When Izumi first meets Meroko, he stares at her as she greets him cheerfully. Even as she smiles, he can see the distant pain in her eyes.

It's a pain he understands very well—the kind that's often shown up in his own eyes.

A part of him—the six-year-old boy inside him that never quite died, but has become much quieter over time—wants to comfort her. But another part of him—the larger, hardened part that was born over years of being a Shinigami and collecting souls—shoves the little boy aside and gives Meroko a cold stare.

2.

The first time she tells him that she loves him, he turns her down flat. She looks heartbroken, but even as her soul is falling apart in her eyes, she tries to be strong. A smile comes to her face, and she laughs it off even as tears form in her eyes.

He looks at her impassively, wondering when she'll break.

For a moment, he wonders what would happen if he reached out and stopped her from breaking, but it doesn't take him long to push that thought from his mind.

Silly, he thinks, to want to make comfort her.

3.

On that rainy day, he notices that their roles have been reversed; usually he's the one turning away, but now he's standing still and she's running away, sobbing and screaming apologies that don't belong.

He tries to numb himself to the pain; he tries not to feel anything for her, for what he's just done. But somewhere deep down, his own heart is breaking over the pain he's caused her.

He has two choices: run after her and apologize and tell her what a fool he was, or stand in the rain and do nothing.

He makes the wrong choice.

4.

A couple days later, he's walking down the street and sees her sitting in the gutter, looking completely dejected—head bowed, shoulders slumped, arms wrapped around her legs. He knows perfectly well that her head is bowed because of him; that she wouldn't be sitting here by herself if it wasn't for him.

As he walks by, he catches an unwilling glimpse of her out of the corner of his eye. Tears are streaming steadily down her face.

She looks up at him under the rim of the hat he had bought for her.

He pretends not to see her.

5.

In the darkness of the alley, when he finally pulls his lips away from hers and releases her wrist, she has a stunned and horrified expression on her face. Tears are welling in her eyes.

In a way, he had meant that kiss to be a sign of how much he loved her, how sorry he was. But mostly it was just to satisfy himself.

Apparently Meroko catches on to this, because she runs away crying.

His hand lifts slightly, as though reaching for her. But in the end, he stays still.

Words were never his strong suit, after all.


Aw, Izumi-kun. Did you ever think of saying "I'm sorry" like a normal person? You know, I don't think he ever did…

RRE.