Disclaimer: I own absolutely Nothing.

A/N: This is actually the first story I ever wrote. It ended up on the waiting list because I got excited about my Heddara idea, but now I decided to split the story in two parts, and publish what I already have written. It's a very different style from "The Princess of Winter", with a lot of monologues and long dialogues.

Warning: The first 2/3 chapters have a slight, very slight, Kaylie Cruz and Marty Walsh bashing. It's not that I hate their characters or anything, but in this part of the story I will just be showing the flaws in their personalities more. For the Kaylie and Marty lovers, don't worry, bashing them will not be a recurring thing in the story.

So here is my Payson/Austin fic for Make it or Break it! I hope you enjoy it!


Chapter 1 (2 weeks AF [After the fall] – May 2010)

I

The birds where singing. She hadn't heard them singing in the mornings since she was 11. She had always had to wake up before the birds did. But now she was stuck in bed and could do nothing but hear their song.

After falling at nationals, she had stayed in the hospital in Hartford for a few days before coming back to Boulder. Her mother and the doctors had told her that she should try to come to terms with what happened, but it wasn't exactly easy. First, she was told she would never do gymnastics again, that her dreams were over. And then the girls she thought where her friends came in to her room dressed in national team tracksuits talking all about how they all made it! In a move that had surprised her, Lauren had actually shown some compassion, which she didn't think she was capable of, and had come in without the jacket and medals. Kaylie and Emily hadn't been that thoughtful.

After they had awkwardly left after she started crying, she hadn't heard from Kaylie again, though Lauren had apparently been calling her mom every other day for updates on her condition, and Emily had stopped by the other day with her mother. Now, two weeks after her fall all the girls would apparently be visiting her.

Her mom had told her yesterday that Lauren had called her to ask if it was ok that they visit. She had been told to try to be nice to the girls and to try to have a good time, like usual. The only problem was that there was nothing usual about her needing a walker to fucking walk!

Great, now she was cursing. She couldn't wait until her mother heard her.


"Pay, the girls are here!" her mom told her, as she knocks on the door, opening it to let Lauren and Kaylie come in.

"Hey guys, sit down. Where is Emily?"

Lauren rolled her eyes "She said she had work, even though two days ago she was totally free."

"Don't say it like that Lauren! She really needs that job!" Kaylie said looking affronted.

"Oh please! We all know what this is really about! She just wants to spend time with her boy toy." Lauren rolled her eyes again a made a disgusted face.

She had to give it to Lauren. Her fellow blonde had always been good at reading people. She had never liked Emily though. Payson was sure that it wasn't really because she was "trailer trash" like she had once called her. It was probably a mixture of Lauren's initial reaction to Emily's sudden appearance and Emily's annoyance with Lauren's flaunt of her wealth.

When the Rock girls first met Emily, Lauren had implemented a full "ice out" on Emily, because she feared that she might steal her spot in the top position. In the end after confirming her status in the Rock internal meet, she had calmed down and evolved into indifference where Emily was concerned.

That competition seemed like so long ago. At the time Emily had been new, but she had hoped they could get to know each other. Now it seemed like she would probably never really get that chance.

"Forget about Kmetko. Your mom told me that you start school in a few weeks. How are you feeling about that?" Lauren seemed genuinely interested and concerned. Payson had to admit that it was heartwarming to have a friend so interested in her recovery. No one else except her family had seem to care. Not even Marty.

Doing her best to get her thoughts away from her coach she focused back on the conversation.

"Yeah, school." Payson cringed, showing her discomfort. "I'm supposed to start going when I'm able to walk normally again. My parents are hoping I can make it before the end of the year. They say this way I can meet people and when I start the new year in September I won't be the new girl anymore" She grimaced. "I'm actually nervous about going to school with the back brace. I bet it will make me popular".

"If they give you trouble you tell me and I'll go kick their asses!" Payson tried to imagine a fight between Lauren and a high school cheerleader and concluded that her friend would definitely win. "And how are you Payson? What do the doctors say?"

"I'm okay, I guess. All the doctors say the same. The first, second and third opinion. I'm lucky it wasn't worse, but now I have to be careful. They all say that gymnastics are over for me." She tried to sound accepting, and by Kaylie's understanding face she was apparently quite successful, but Lauren didn't seem like she bought it.

"Do you want a reference for another doctor? I could ask my dad. Those doctors are definitely not doing all they can" Lauren asked in a rush.

"Lo, don't but in on Payson's business!" Kaylie seamed scandalized by Lauren's offer of help. Payson frowned at this reaction.

"I'm trying to help! Seriously Pay, if you don't like your doctor here in Boulder promise to give me a call."

"Lo!" Kaylie whispered. It seemed to Payson as if she almost didn't want her to get better.

"No, it's ok. I appreciate it. I have a doctor's appointment every two weeks for now. I'll see what he says. If I don't like him I'll talk to you about it." Payson smiled at Lauren. She really was a good friend. She felt bad for underestimating her in the past.

"It's not that I don't want you to get better, because I do." Kaylie said with an apologetic face "I just don't want you to be disappointed."

"It's fine, I get it." It seemed that her most used words in the last couple of weeks had been "fine" and "ok", accompanied by a false smile. "Let's talk about something else. How was the parade? I saw some of it on tv."

"It was great!" Kaylie said with a brilliant smile.

"It was super boring" Lauren said with a frown.

Payson laughed lightly at the different descriptions. "So… which one was it?"

"Kaylie may think it was fun, but that's only because she was the center of attention and she had eye candy beside her. I mean you just broke up with Carter and now you're running straight to Russo? He is a robot!"

"There is nothing between me and Nicky! And Carter and I split three weeks ago. He slept with some random girl at that keg party! Which you introduced him to!"

"Three weeks is such a long time…" Lauren rolled her eyes again. She seemed to be doing that a lot lately around Kaylie.

Payson tried not to flinch. Nicky and Kaylie? She thought that Nicky might like her, but apparently, she was wrong. He had approached her a week before nationals, after Marty got the gym therapist to give her a cortisone shot, and they had discussed their injuries and how they both wanted to finally beat their rivals, her Kelly Parker and him Austin Tucker. He even visited her a few days before and she was sure that he had almost kissed her! She had thought that they had gotten along well... Maybe Lauren was just seeing things. Or being her normal teasing/scheming self.

"Come on Kay, you were making out at that party with that guy, after you did that keg-stand thing! It's not like you're a saint!" Apparently, Kaylie and Lauren where now rehashing the whole Kayter breakup. Or was it Carlie?

"I was drunk! I don't even remember half of it! And you ended up having sex with that guy from the band that Emily likes!" Ok now Kaylie was obviously trying to change the subject.

"Oh, come on! Emily likes the Damon guy! Or Razor, depending on the day of the week! It was the drummer and let me tell you, drummers have great arms. And I was not that drunk. I remember everything and it was actually nice. I would totally try to get him to do the friends with benefits thing if he wasn't so annoying" Lauren made a disgusted face. "But anyway, you say you can't trust Carter, but your being stupid in my opinion."

When Kaylie started numbering all the different things that Carter had done to get her to lose her confidence in him, Payson decided that it was time to change the subject.

"Look, are you guys still mad at each other? What happened this time?" Payson was confused now. What the hell where these girls doing? Couldn't they slow down on the drama? They'd had this discussion a hundred times now.

"Lauren is being insensitive" Kaylie spit out with venom in her voice.

"No, you're the one who doesn't know how to deal with her responsibilities. You want the rewards but don't want the rest that comes with it." She rolled her eyes, again, but seemed actually mad at Kaylie. Payson was curious about what they were talking about. "But we are not here to talk about those things. Tell me Pay, are there any MacDreamy doctors at the hospital that you could introduce to me?" She winked at Payson, trying to change the subject.

"Stop being an idiot Lauren. You never help me with my problems!" Now Kaylie seemed like she was going to cry.

Payson sighed, she had her own big problems but Kaylie still came to her for help. Maybe if she focused on her issues for a while she would forget that currently she could only stay upright with the help of a metal contraption.

"Kaylie, what's wrong?" she asked.

"I don't know how you did it Pay. The pressure of being the best. Trying to stay on top. Dealing with the coaches. Marty wants me to upgrade my routines. And all the girls at the gym want advice… sometimes I wish I hadn't won… The only thing I like is the sponsorship deals and stuff like the parade." She sighed with a sad face, as if the whole world was against her.

Payson registered in the back of her mind the Lauren was sending Kaylie furious looks, but she didn't care. Right now, she was having a hard time keeping her mouth shut. She wanted to shout at Kaylie. To show her hurt and lash out. But she wouldn't. She was Payson Keeler and she was not going to react like a stupid teenager. She was the girl who decided at eight years old that she would be going to the 2012 and 2016 Olympic Games, and then proceeded to research all about it. She was a mature seventeen-year-old. An adult in mind if not in body.

But she wasn't perfect and couldn't help but let a comment slip.

"Well, we could trade. How about I give you the back brace and you give me the medal?" She asked with a strained smile.

Kaylie seemed dumbstruck for a moment.

"I didn't mean it like that Pay, honestly." She seemed apologetic now. Like she had now realized how self-centered she had been. Kaylie had always been like that. Lauren too, but she seemed to be slowly changing.

"I know. I get it. I'm sorry, I'm really tired. Do you guys mind if we talk another time?"

Kaylie seamed apologetic as she said her goodbyes. Lauren actually reached out to hug her and whispered "Don't listen to her. She's being a pampered idiot." Not that Lauren had much room to talk about being pampered, but Payson appreciated the sentiment.

The girls left and Payson laid back on her bed and cried. She cried for the dreams that she lost and could never get back. And for the people that seemed to not care after all.


As soon as they were outside Lauren turned off her happy fluffy girl face and let her fury be seen.

"What the hell was that Kaylie!"

"What do you mean? I didn't want Payson to get upset. I just wanted advice about how to deal with all this stuff that is happening!" Kaylie seemed genuinely upset. But that was the problem with Kaylie. She always thought that she just needed to show that she was sorry and everything would be perfect again.

"Stuff that is happening? Do you realize how much "stuff" Payson has happening right now? Do you think she has time to deal with yours? We talked about this before Kay!" She was not going to let Kaylie brush this under the rug. "Way to go. Tell the girl that lost her dream that you wish you didn't have it. Better yet ask her how she felt with being number one, reminding her how far away from it she is now!"

Kaylie looked contrite, but there was still some stubbornness there.

"You know I didn't mean it like that Lo" Great, she was almost whining now.

"You might not have meant it, and said you're sorry, but just saying the word doesn't mean that the hurt you caused will just disappear. If you want things to go back, be prepared to grovel."

Kaylie gave a big sigh at her response, like putting in the work to show Payson she was sorry was going to be some huge thing.

Just what was going on with Kaylie? Didn't she realize what was happening around her? Had she always been this sheltered?


"Payson seemed a bit down at dinner. Did something happen this afternoon?"

Kim and Becca looked at each other from each corner of the sofa. Marc's question was simple enough, but the answer was anything but.

"I don't know honey. Kaylie and Lauren where here. When they left Kaylie seemed upset. I tried to ask Payson what happened but she just said that Kaylie was disappointed that she cut the meeting short when she got tired and wanted to rest." Kim kept her voice down. Payson was supposed to be sleeping but she didn't want to risk it.

"Uh... I kinda know what happened...?" Becca looked down like she had done something wrong.

"Have you been listening at the doors again Becca Keeler!" Kim sounded reproachful. And Becca knew that if her mom didn't want to know what she had heard she would be grounded.

"Sorry! I won't do it again, I swear! But it was for a good cause!" Becca was rushing now, she had to be quick before her dad caught up and grounded her himself. "I know from the Gym that Kaylie and Lauren have been fighting about Payson and didn't want them to make her upset"

"What do you mean? Did they say something?"

Becca quickly told her parents about the conversation that had happened that afternoon, skipping the Carlie details that she was definitely going to gossip about with her friends tomorrow.

"She was totally awesome when she asked them to leave her room. I would have definitely given her hell! Anyway, she cried a bit after that, and then went to sleep. I think that she is also sad that Marty hasn't come over to see her at all. I mean, he told me to wish her the best when she came back to Boulder, but is not really the same, is it? And he hasn't mentioned her at ell since then." She finally finished.

Marc and Kim looked at each other. This was serious.

"Well young lady, you are going to bed early for that stunt. No more TV today." When Becca opened her mouth to protest Kim decided on the winning strategy "Would you like me to call Katy's parents and tell them you won't be going for the sleepover tomorrow?"

As Becca quickly made her way to her room, Marc turned to Kim looking worried.

"I didn't realize that Marty had distanced himself that much. Do you think it is a problem?"

"Yes. You remember that he was the reason we moved here. We came because Payson trusted Marty and she believed that he could make her an Olympian. She saw him for hours every day. She almost idolized him. Him staying away is definitely not good" Kim sighed, she was heartbroken for her daughter, but there was nothing she could do except be there for her. "And this thing with Kaylie, I honestly thought that the girls would be supportive, specially Kaylie, but I guess I was wrong." She sighed again. Maybe she should speak with Kaylie's mom about her behavior.

"Do you think the responsibilities and expectations of her new status are getting to her?" Marcus was trying to make sense of this mess but Kim was getting frustrated.

"That's probably it, but there are a million people she could talk to about it without having to bother Payson. Her parents where both famous, they would know how to help her!" She took a deep breath to center herself. She shouldn't get too upset about something like this. "I'll try to talk to her mother tomorrow. And I will speak to Lauren about her coming over after Payson's physical therapy on Monday. At least she seems to be good for Payson, despite how unlikely it was at first"

"What should we do about Marty? Should we talk with him too?" Marc seemed reticent about it and Kim had to agree. Maybe Payson needed a clean break from Marty, if he was so unreliable to his injured athletes.

"I think I will speak with Payson about him. We will see. But for now, I won't speak to him about it."