"You know what I don't get, Shizu-chan?"
I stopped slurping my milk that ensue the cookies in my mouth.
I swallowed, "This should be interesting. What's bothering you?"
"Well, this is just a query, but…" he trailed off, "…what happens to socks in the dryer?"
"…What?"
He looked at me emphatically, "You heard what I said, protozoan!"
I shrugged, "Izaya, I think you just screwed up my equilibrium."
"Ugh!" he groaned, "what…happens…to socks…in the DRYER…?"
"…What…?" I seriously didn't get it, but when I ran my fingers through my blonde hair, it's like a light bulb finally went off in my head, "Oh, you mean when people say that they can't find the other sock in a pair when they do the laundry?"
"YES, that's exactly what I'm getting at, "he looked annoyed and erratic, "Now, do you know what happens to them?"
I shook my head, "Can't say that I do. It happens to me a lot, but I normally find them behind and around the dryer. I hate making two trips since it seems to encumber me…or maybe I'm just lazy…? Anyway, I think that sometimes the socks fall where they drop, and we just miss one somehow."
His eyes widened in admiration. It's very rare to see him do this with me.
"Oh, thanks, Shizu-chan!" He went on to encompass my waist with his arms in a hug and skipped off to where I'm guessing was the laundry room. I shook my head in disbelief, "I swear…"
About an hour and a half later, Izaya pokes my cheek, emancipating me from my slumber. I lazily roll one eye to look at him.
"Ugh…what? You hungry?"
He negates with his head and leans closer to my face. Seriously, he's starting to scare me at this point…
"Um, Shizu-chan?"
"Yes?"
"…Why isn't 'pants' a singular word?"
I groan. Here goes another episode…
I slide off the couch and say testily, "What kind of question is that?"
"…A wardrobe question."
"…God…fine." I sigh, "I really don't know why 'pants' isn't a singular word. I'm gonna be honest, I've thought about this a couple of times. I'm guessing it's because pants have two…'pant holes'-"
"You mean pants legs?"
"Yeah, that…but all in all, that's my…"I hesitated, not believing what I was about to say next, "…that is my…educated guess…to your question. Does that help?"
He nodded his head excitedly and gazed at me like I was part of the "elite few".
"Yup-yup~!" he giggled, "Thanks, Shizu-chan!"
He gives me another hug and skips off. This time, he goes to his room.
"Sheesh…"
ANOTHER hour passed, and I was typing up the finishing touches on my research paper, something that Izaya said he was almost finished with a week after it was assigned. My fingers didn't slow by a second until HE showed up. I didn't even give him a second glance when I resumed my fast pace.
"Uh, Shizu-chan?"
"Don't you do it."
"Why can't money grow on trees?"
I throw my arms in frustration and look at him straight into his eyes.
"BECAUSE THEY CAN'T, IZAYA! They just can't!" I pause, then look at the raven-haired boy in front of me that I was resisting the temptation to strangle. A thought comes to mind…
"Or hey, you know what? They actually CAN. Yeah, it's just that the government does not want us citizens to know about the 'amazing' advancements they've made on trees! They've kept this in secret so long! Money has already been growing on trees for the past six years and a half! SIX YEARS AND A HALF." I reiterate.
"It started out with a penny. Then, a rare element that they found, which they call the 'this-will-make-money-grow-on-trees' element, 216th on the Periodic Table, makes it possible for all that green stuff to grow on trees…and I'm NOT talking about leaves! Then, dimes and nickels, even SILVER DOLLARS could be planted in the ground, and in two to four months, a full grown 'Money Tree' will be in its place. The results were completely accurate, HOWEVER, the government has enjoined everyone involved in this secret project to never tell a soul about the new find. But…just how did I find out about it, I-za-ya?"
He gulped, "Uh…Wikipedia?"
I put my finger in the air and wound it in a circle.
"DING-DING-DING-DING! Gee, look who's finally catching on! Yes, Wikipedia, so whenever you have one of those-oh, I don't know-'BRAIN-RATTLING' questions, go…contact…THEM."
We looked at each other in total silence. I'm panting like crazy, and Izaya's staring at me with wide, red eyes. Then, his face breaks out in a goofy grin, and he hugs once more.
"Oh, thanks, Shizu-chan!"
And with that, he skipped off into his living room to play on his laptop. I think of all that energy I just wasted and all the things that I just ran off the top of my head. I pound my head onto my own keyboard, making the letter "j" repeat itself over and over again. I lift my head up when Izaya suddenly calls me.
"Shizu-chan! Shizu-chan! You were right! IT IS REAL!"
At this point, I might just pass my research paper...
HA! This has got to be one of my favorite Vocab Assignments! My teacher thought it was...weird...STILL LOVE YA, TEACH!
