A/N: Yes I know. I need to stop posting new multichaps when I'm not finished with others yet. But the muse for this one was just too strong to ignore anymore. I didn't want to loose it. So this story came about because I have this theory/headcanon that Jake and Cassandra have been secretly dating all through season 2. So what you see here is basically my idea of how that could have gone down. Enjoy LITs, and enjoy the finale tonight!
Prologue: Peru
Cassandra
It all started with a kiss. It was just an innocent little kiss. Well maybe not innocent. I still don't know how it happened, or rather why it happened. No; I knew why: I'd been enamored with Jacob Stone since the second day I knew him. What I mean is, I don't know why it happened when it happened.
We were in Peru, and we'd been there for a few days, and we'd just gotten back to the hotel where we were staying. There'd been a big fallout that day and Ezekiel was all mad and not speaking to either of us. That was the beginning of the end of our little adventure as a team, but it marked the beginning of the beginning of something else entirely.
I couldn't sleep, thinking about everything. I don't know what brought me out to the hallway, but something did. I was in my pajamas and barefoot; I remember the floor was cold. More than anything, I remember the surprise of looking to my left and finding Jake sitting there, against the wall between our doorways.
"Hey" I said. He jerked his head up. "Sorry if I scared you."
"No not at all" he mumbled. "Hi"
"You couldn't sleep either?" I asked.
"Nope"
Then there was silence. I looked down at the floor. It really was a rough night. I had no idea what was happening, and that scared me. It shouldn't have. My whole life had been about not knowing what the future held, but the Library changed that. It erased it, or made me feel better about it. I didn't know which. What I did know was that loosing that comfort felt like some kind of emptiness.
"God Cassandra is this the end?" Jake finally sighed. "Is everything we all built together over?"
"I don't think so" I lied. It was more for me than him. I needed to believe that everything would be okay.
"But Jones seems real angry"
"I think he just needs some time. He's probably frustrated. It's hard to remember sometimes: he's just a kid"
"Well, thanks for having my back anyway."
"I'm always going to have your back Jacob"
I didn't know why I said it. It was the truth, but since when was I one to go blurting the truth all the time? I didn't really lie, sure, but I withheld things, especially when it came to Jake.
There was silence again. I couldn't tell what he was thinking. I worried how he perceived what I said. Once again I didn't know anything: a paralyzing feeling.
What I did know was that it was the middle of the night, and we were alone out here, and Jake looked tired, but he smelt like musty shower gel, and the smoke from the fires we'd encountered that day.
When his lips met mine, I was terrified, but I didn't pull back. Because God, I'd wanted this moment for six months. Maybe this exactly wasn't how I'd pictured it; I didn't really know how I'd pictured it. Whatever it was, it was happening now, and it was happening all so fast. My heart was pounding against my shirt, but dear lord I was kissing him back.
His lips tasted like beer. He must've been drinking. I couldn't blame him. I didn't have time to focus on that though because the smells of him, the smells of comfort and fear and hope and regret, were all around. Bright pinks and yellows filled my mind.
We pulled away. Both of us were breathing heavily. After only a moment's hesitation, somehow, we stood up and then we were kissing again. Jake led me towards his door and I didn't falter. He pushed it open with his back and then we were inside, still kissing, more heavily this time. My heart had never beaten this hard in my entire life.
Then my hands were in his hair, his soft, perfect hair, still wet from the shower I could sense he'd taken. His arms were around my waist, and then his hands were running up and down my back and it all felt so wrong but so right at the same time, and no I couldn't stop now.
It didn't go further than that: kissing, touching. Never the less, my life changed that night in a way I never could have expected
Jake
I felt alone that night until she was there. I was alone, and afraid, and I really thought that everything good I'd come into in the last six months was coming crashing down. Then she came outside, and she didn't run away; she stayed. If she was staying, maybe it meant that not everything good in my life was going away.
I could barely register anything she said, but I knew she'd asked me if I had trouble sleeping. I told her yes. Truth was, I hadn't tried to go to sleep. If I'd gone to sleep, I could've woken up to a different life. They could be gone, and I could be on my own.
We talked for a while. I didn't hesitate to voice my fears around her. She understood. I knew she understood. Still, through it all, I could barely hear anything she was saying. My mind was in a fog, a fog of worry and self-loathing. I couldn't help but feel that if we fell apart, it was my fault.
I knew I didn't deserve everything Cassandra did for me. In the hardest times, when I wasn't sure if I belonged in this world of ours, she made it all make sense. She balances out my mind, and I can't even tell her that I trust her. The words, the truths, were flying from my mouth without me realizing it. I wasn't even sure what I said when her next words rang out, the clearest things I'd heard all day.
"I'm always going to have your back Jacob"
I love that, the way she calls me Jacob. It feels so honest, so real, like she's addressing me for who I am, and not who I was. "Stone" sounds like the man who got into bar fights after working on his father's oil rig. "Jacob" sounds more like an artist, an intellectual. I'd never heard her call me that before that night.
All of a sudden I looked up at her, really looked at her. She was in her pajamas: loose sweat pants and a tank-top. She looked gorgeous. I'd been attracted to her for a long time of course, since we first met, but never like this. Sitting there she looked sexy, and I couldn't help but feel that that had more to it than what she was wearing.
I didn't know what came over me, but I leaned in, and the next thing I knew, we were kissing. I could barely register anything except the fact that our lips were meeting, and she tasted like everything I'd ever wanted. I was a little buzzed, sure, but this was more than that. This was months in the making.
I didn't even know what was happening until we were in my hotel room and she was close to me, closer than she'd ever been. I could feel her curls brushing against my skin. Her hands tickled my scalp as they ran through my hair, and my stomach lurched.
My hands found their way up and down her back, and before I knew it they were under her shirt. Her skin, the skin I'd dreamt about, was soft and warm. She was shaking, but then again I was shaking too. This had to be wrong, but if it was, why did my whole soul feel at peace?
She pushed me forward and soon we were on the bed. She was on top of me, and our bodies intertwined, My hands were still running across her back underneath her shirt, and then she was kissing my neck.
It took every ounce of strength I had, emotional strength, to push her off of me. This was not the time. Not yet. If I didn't stop it, I knew we'd both have regrets in the morning. Whatever we were going to be, I didn't want it to start with regrets.
"Cassie, Cassie, Cassie" I urged. She was fighting me, trying to continue the kissing. God I wished I'd had less of a conscience in that moment.
"Not yet" I explained.
We sat on the bed next to each other, and once we'd regained our composures, she smiled at me. I knew she was glad I'd stopped things when I did, and so was I.
"Goodnight" she finally said.
"Night" I replied, nodding my head towards her as she walked out the door.
That was the last time we were alone for three months. The next morning, before we really got anything done, Ezekiel ran off, and for some stupid reason, we figured the only thing to do was to do the same.
A/N: So that's that. I hoped you liked it! I have about 3 multichaps I'll be writing, so I'm going to try and go on some kind of schedule. As of right now, the plan is after today, this one will be updated either every Monday, or every Wednesday. I haven't figured it out yet. Once I do, the schedule will be posted on my Tumblr account, kingdomkeeperofthelibrary. Bye everyone, thanks for reading!
