Valentine's Day Chocolate II – Bantha Meat Flavoured ! – Non Slash –
Author: sakurafromjapan
Rating: PG 14 or R for the mention of Bantha's pee . . .
Pairing: Anakin (20) / Obi-Wan (36)
Disclaimer: SW is George Lucas's creation. This fic is mine but I have no intention of making money writing this.
Timeline: Post AotC
Genre: Humour
Words: 5395
Prequel: To this fic is "Valentine's Day Chocolate I – From Anakin With Love".
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"It's for you."
"What is it ?" Obi-Wan looked up from the poetry book he was reading.
"A Valentine's Day chocolate."
Obi-Wan stared down at the chocolate that was neatly placed in the centre of an opened gift box which was small but colourful and beautiful.
"I made it just for you." Anakin's voice was already getting whiny and nasal.
Obi-Wan sighed. Last time Anakin made one for him ( when Anakin was still his sweet little 12 year old Ani ), it tasted like rotten Bantha meat. How a chocolate could taste like Bantha meat . . . was still a mystery, though.
"It took me the whole day to make this." Now he was pouting with his lower lip slightly out – completed with furrowed eyebrows which made him all the more cute(?) - well, "in a way".
"What's in it ?"
"Why do you care ?"
"I'm just . . . curious."
"Um . . . cocoa, Corellian sugar, blue milk, puréed Bantha meat . . . "
"Bantha meat !"
I knew it !
"Yes, we put some puréed fresh Bantha meat in Valentine's Day chocolate on Tatooine. It's an old tradition."
". . . . . ."
"You're not going to eat this chocolate, then, huh ?" Anakin huffed, already on the verge of tears, "There is 'love' in this chocolate, Master."
"Did you give one to . . . um," Obi-Wan swallowed. "Padme ? . . . like you did several years ago ?"
"No."
"Why ?" said Obi-wan, alarmed.
"She said she's on a diet so . . . she politely, but firmly refused to accept it." Anakin shrugged his shoulders as if to say that this is no big deal although – clearly, his eyes said the opposite.
Obi-Wan sighed and looked up. Then he saw this sad-looking Anakin whose feelings were about to be hurt by his own Master. The boy always used the sad puppy dog eye look to get his way – and it always worked.
"I . . . " He hesitated for a few seconds but gave in - as usual, ". . . shall eat this, then."
Anakin perked up, delighted that the chocolate has been finally accepted. "I . . . I'll go get your favourite chocolate liquor, then ! Just . . . wait right here, Master. I'll be right back !"
Anakin dashed into the kitchen and dashed back into the living room with a bottle of very expensive chocolate liquor Obi-Wan had received from one of the Alderaanian Senators. It was 290 years old and still almost full to the brim.
Obi-Wan winced.
"Here, Master." Anakin held out a small glass and the bottle, smiling all the while.
Obi-Wan took both and poured himself a glass of chocolate liquor in silence, drank it, took the Bantha flavoured chocolate, popped it into his mouth and chewed it for a little while, trying not to vomit.
When he finally couldn't stand the taste anymore, he snatched the bottle out of Anakin's hand and poured himself another drink, and washed it all down with three gulps of liquor.
"Did you like it, Master ?"
"Yes . . . it was . . . very . . . good." – was all he managed to say - for the moment.
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Few hours later, Obi-Wan was lying on his bed, suffering from mild stomach ache. All the while, Anakin, perched on the edge of the bed, was holding one of Obi-Wan's hands in his both hands. Occasionally, he patted Obi-Wan gently on the back of his hand like a mother trying to comfort her child.
Dr Toynber was summoned immediately.
Dr Toynber, a member of a reptilian species with no eyelids, asked several questions without blinking. He finally asked this:
"What have you eaten and/or drunk in the past few hours, may I ask ?"
Obi-Wan opened his mouth but before he could say anything, Anakin answered the question, "Chocolate liquor and a piece of chocolate, Master Toynber."
"Now . . . which one of them caused the stomach ache, I wonder ?" Dr Toynber said, slowly rubbing his chin back and forth, both confused and bemused.
Anakin and Obi-Wan said in chorus:
"Liquor."
"Chocolate."
Silence.
Anakin slowly turned and looked at his Master with shock and disbelief both clearly shown in his eyes, "What . . . did you . . . just say ?"
"Er . . . I said . . . 'liquor', Anakin," Obi-Wan muttered under his breath, and then looked up. "Of course, it was 'liquor' that did it . . ." he laughed weakly for emphasis.
Dr Toynber stood up and was getting ready to leave. Putting his robe back on, he said, "Well, then. Take these blue pills. 3 pills, twice a day – for three days. You'll feel better soon, then, Master Kenobi." Dr turned to Anakin and said, "Take good care of your Master, Anakin"
"I WILL, Master Toynber !" Anakin said, maybe a little too eagerly.
Obi-Wan winced.
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After Dr Toynber was gone, Anakin who had walked him to the front door, quietly slipped into his Master's bedroom and made an announcement, "Master, I'm going to discard all the rest of the chocolate liquor, all right ?"
"No !" Obi-Wan said aloud, horrified.
"Master," Anakin giggled, "Don't be such a baby. That Alderaanian chocolate liquor 'is' what caused all this trouble, remember ?"
"No . . . you don't understand, Anakin . . ."
Anakin blinked, stared at him for a few seconds and gave him a gentle smile, "I'll be right back."
"No ! Anakin, wait . . . !"
Obi-Wan tried to go after him but his weak body due to the stomach ache was not cooperating very well. Then it was . . . too late. Just like that. Even his Force seemed to be somewhere - on leave.
A few minutes later, Obi-Wan was still in bed, not being able to do anything about all this. Then he heard his precious chocolate liquor being poured down the drain; Glug ! Glug ! Glug ! Glug ! Glug ! Glug ! . . . . . .
Anakin returned and perched himself on the edge of the bed again, but noticed that Obi-Wan was weeping silently, he held his Master in his arms and gave him a squeeze, feeling more like a mother than a Jedi.
Rocking him gently in his arms, Anakin said, "Don't cry, Master. I'll give you some white chocolate liquor instead, then."
Obi-Wan stopped crying and looked up.
"White chocolate liquor ? I've never heard of such a thing."
"Funny you don't know it . . . " Anakin giggled, "It's famous . . ."
"Alderaanian ?"
"No. Made in Tatooine."
Obi-Wan frowned, "What the Force . . . "
"It's a new, popular stuff in Tatooine, Master." Anakin tried to explain well to get him interested, "I mean . . . everybody out there has now discovered that it's really healthy to drink this organic Corellian white brandy mixed with Bantha's urine . . ."
"Bantha's urine !" Obi-Wan screamed, horrified.
"It's only a few drops of the urine that's mixed with the brandy, Master." Anakin countered with more details.
Obi-Wan scrubbed a hand across his bearded face and sighed, his shoulders slumped. He was extremely tired. All he wanted was a goodnight's sleep.
Pinching the bridge of his nose, Obi-Wan said, "Can I have something hot to drink or eat, Anakin ?"
Anakin perked up at the mention of food, obviously remembering something important that might cheer him up. "Hey, I made some soup while you were asleep, Master," he said, looking extremely jubilant. "You wanna try it right now ? In your bed ?"
"Yes, please."
Anakin jumped from the bed. Then he stopped at the door, turned around, and raised his index finger, "One moment."
Anakin stormed out of the room.
Obi-Wan sighed.
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"Here, Master."
"What's in it ?" Obi-Wan asked.
Anakin laughed. "You're getting paranoid !"
Obi-Wan looked at him suspiciously and sniffed at the soup. Then he sighed and timidly took a spoonful - a few noodles, a couple of floating carrots and peas, and some unidentified meat parts and rich-looking brown soup. He stared hard at the ingredients and sighed and decided to give it a try for Anakin's sake.
Anakin watched his Master's eyebrows shoot up in delight and smiled.
It tasted pretty good.
"I think I like it." Obi-Wan said and to prove it, he ate and drank the soup up to the last drop.
Obi-Wan's first bowl of soup was almost gone, so Anakin asked him if he wanted more. And . . . to his surprise, his Master said Yes.
Just as Anakin was about to leave with a now-empty bowl, Obi-Wan stopped him. "Anakin. Just a moment."
Anakin stopped – as if he suddenly got frozen and turned into a solid clump of ice on Hoth. "Yes, Master ?" He said, his back still facing his Master.
"Look at me, Anakin." He sighed.
Anakin did so.
"What's in it ?" His cultured accent was clipped than ever.
"Why do you care ?" Anakin asked, slightly alarmed.
"I just want to make sure there is nothing peculiar put in the soup."
"Um . . . " Anakin frowned, trying hard to remember what exactly it was he put in the soup. ". . . carrots . . . tomatoes . . . peas . . . onions . . . Corellian sugar . . . brown sauce . . . green salt and pepper . . . and . . ." Then Anakin smiled sheepishly and added. ". . . Bantha meat."
"Bantha meat !"
I should have known !
"But I cut it into bite-size pieces !" Anakin said indignantly.
"That's not the point, Anakin ! I HATE Bantha meat or . . . anything to do with this bloody creature !"
"But you've already tried it and . . ." Anakin added, perplexed. "well, you loved it."
Why me ? Don't bad things happen only to bad ones ? Am I that bad ?
"Anakin . . . what have I done to deserve this . . . "
". . . this special treatment ?" Anakin finished the sentence for him, "Because . . . ," he poked the tip of his Master's well-shaped nose and pressed it lightly, "You are my Master." He said and smiled – as if that explains everything.
Now, Obi-Wan looked back at him with tears in his eyes, almost ready to cry – for himself and for the Alderaanian chocolate liquor he would never get to taste again.
Ever.
End
