"Jesus titfucking Christ!" Karkat yelled, slamming the door to his apartment behind him, stomping through the living room. He threw his leather satchel down on the couch and stormed into the kitchen where Gamzee was on his phone, propped up against the oven, waiting for his 'miraculous pies' to finish baking. He looked up from the screen and at his boyfriend who was busy grabbing a bag of marshmallows out of a cupboard to anger-binge.

Karkat hastily stuffed three marshmallows into his mouth and slouched against the counter, crossing his arms. Gamzee smiled at him and walked over.

"Heyyy Karbro," he said, parading towards Karkat, "How'd ya day go?"

"How woo ooh ffuhheen fink," the shorter of the two tried to say, rolling his eyes as Gamzee placed his hands on his shoulders and leaned down to plant a kiss on his forehead.

"What?"

Karkat swallowed the last of the chewed-up marshmallows.

"How do you fucking think?"

Gamzee chuckled. "Judgin' by the motherfuckin' charismatic entrance ya made, not so miraculous."

"That word is making it fucking worse, you bumbling idiot."

"Aww, I'm just tryin'a make ya feel a bit better," Gamzee whined, pouting and picking Karkat up to place him on the counter. He wrapped his arms around the other and nuzzled his nose into the crook of Karkat's neck. He kissed his light skin gently and rubbed his back slightly.

"Can ya tell me what's got ya up an' troubled?" he asked.

Karkat sighed.

"Stupid fucking elite goddamn arts university and its stupid exams. I am a theatre major, not an engineering geek. I don't see why we have to have so many puerile tests. Who needs to take a quiz about how to fake your fucking emotions?!" he ranted, huffing and slouching into Gamzee's shoulder.

Gamzee smiled knowingly. Exams were ridiculous, even for him. Visual and musical arts students still had to take idiotically difficult and lengthy tests.

"Ahh. Too much crammin' 'n not enough time?" he asked, leaning back and looking down at Karkat who had popped another marshmallow in his mouth. The clown brought his hand up and brushed away a few stray clusters of hair from Karkat's face. Karkat nodded and finished his marshmallow.

Gamzee leaned down and kissed Karkat's cheek, the Cancer rolling his eyes so intensely he thought they would sprain.

"Fucking touchy-feely-ass juggalo. I'm going to go lay down," he grumbled, twisting his bag of white puffy deliciousness shut and jumping off of the counter. Gamzee stepped aside as he did so. Oh boy, was Karkat in for a surprise.

Karkat walked into the hallway, passed the bathroom, and put a hand on the doorknob to his bedroom. He leaned back and yelled.

"Gamzee! Don't leave the oven on after you take out your weed pies this time!" He turned the knob and opened the door, still shouting. "I don't want another nearly burnt down hou- WHAT THE FUCK?!"

Gamzee smirked.

Karkat's jaw dropped at the sight in front of him. There on his bed, on the dark blue comforter, were fifteen. Fucking. Kittens.

"Wheh- whaadda… Whh… Why in the… How…" Karkat stuttered, pointing to the clowder of fluffballs on his bed. One ginger kitty jumped of the bed and pranced towards him, mewling and rubbing himself up against his ankles.

"Aww, looks like the little motherfucker likes ya," Gamzee said suddenly, making Karkat nearly jump out of his skin as he leaned casually in the doorway.

Karkat turned around and held his hands out in front of him. He couldn't tell if he was elated or irritated.

"Gam, what… what in the fuck is this?"

"Uhh, well they ain't related so to speak, so this ain't a litter. I think it's called a kindle-"

"No, you aborted Macklemore motherfucker, I mean what is this?! Why are there a shit-ton of kittens on our bed?!" He walked into the room, surveying the feline-filled area. He loved cats but he didn't know what to make of this.

"Well you've been- Oh! Woah there lil' guy, watch out!" he said calmly, scooting the ginger cat away from the open door with his foot closed said door behind him quietly and walked over to the bed, flopping down on it and continuing what he started to say.

"Ya've been rantin' about how motherfuckin' stressful school is, so I thought doin' somethin' like this would help to calm ya down. 'Cause I know ya like cats. I do too, so-"

"How did you get so many of them?!" Karkat interrupted, swiveling around with a gray tabby in his arms. He sat down on the bed and scratched its cheeks, chuckling softly as he heard it begin to purr. Gamzee smiled and sat up, his legs crossed.

"That don't need to be known by anyone else than I, Karbro."

"I didn't know you had a 'guy' for goddamned kittens too," Karkat joked, letting the small cat escape and jump off the bed. He stared at the wall in front of him as he realized something.

He was surrounded by cats.

Gamzee got fifteen kittens somehow.

Just to cheer him up.

Karkat laughed, his head hanging down. Gamzee raised an eyebrow.

"Gamzee, you are a fucking imbecile, and I hope you realize that," Karkat said, turning around and running his hand through Gamzee's hair. He leaned forward and kissed him on the lips. Gamzee grinned.

"I knew this'd work!" he said happily, throwing his fists into the air. Karkat sighed.

"Of fucking course you did."

He scratched the ginger kitten's belly as it jumped up beside him and laid on its back. He smiled gently.

"...You realize that we can't keep them, right, Gam?" he inquired suspiciously, one eyebrow arching.

Gamzee's eyes widened.

"Uhh… I didn't think of that part."

"Of fucking course you didn't."