Of Fairytales and Fables
By ElemenTalia
Beta'd by ElemenTalia and and nightslashcheetor
Disclaimer: I do not own Bleach in any way, nor do I own the Peanuts quote that is in there.
Summary: There's a rule of thumb: Frustrations and guilt can bring any man down, especially when one is both frustrated that he or she cannot confess, and guilty because he or she hurt their love. Ichigo is no exception to the rule. Perhaps an essay will fix the problem. Female Ichigo/Byakuya
Authors Note: I worked really hard at making Byakuya and Ichigo as realistic as possible, but I can't tell how I did. ^_^ Please enjoy
But when a young lady is to be a heroine, the perverseness of forty surrounding families cannot prevent her. Something must and will happen to throw a hero in her way.
Jane Austen, Northanger Abbey
English novelist (1775 - 1817)
Ichigo stretched slightly, silent as she gazed onto the notebook in her lap of lined paper, parts of which were written on. Lazily she tapped her pencil against her thigh. She closed her eyes peacefully, feeling her long orange hair tickling her skin. A smirk crossed her face as the breeze carried the voices of an angry Toushiro yelling at Matsumoto for getting too drunk. The smirk widened when the breeze carried the drunk woman's loud and obnoxious reply.
It was a beautiful night, dark and cool enough to bring a sense of peace, yet warm enough to be comfortable. In the sky, hundreds of stars twinkled brightly, all as bright as the hallowing moon. Yet, despite the beauty of the night, Ichigo couldn't help but allow her mind to wander into dark thoughts.
Recently they had just managed to defeat another group of Arrancars, and to celebrate, Ichigo, Chad, and Orihime came to Soul Society to celebrate. Now, Ichigo couldn't help but regret it, seeing as how she seemed to be the only sober one there. She winced, feeling guilty.
The battle had been a normal one, filled with blood, stab wounds, and overly obnoxious villains. Ichigo hadn't even had to resort to her Bankai, much less to her Vizard mask. Things had been going great, and Ichigo, bored out of her mind, had been about to finish off the Arrancar she was facing with a Getsuga Tensho, when things suddenly changed.
A Senkaimon had appeared, and Byakuya and Renji stepped out of it, literally in the path of Ichigo's attack. Unable to get out of the way because of how close the attack was, the two could do nothing but brace themselves. Renji, who was enough out of the way, merely gained a few new scratches, yet Byakuya, who took the brunt of it, could not use his arms for the pain, and was heavily injured in the chest. Renji, worried, quickly took him to Orihime who was hovering, nervously on the side, where she immediately began to heal him. An ten minutes after having received the injury, and Byakuya was just as healthy as before. Still. Things had changed.
After the first real injury of the battle, caused by their own side none the less, Ichigo, Chad, and the rest of the Shinigami, worried for the icy captain, finished their fights quickly. Ichigo snorted as her mind whimsically added how it was the exact opposite of a fairytale.
In a fairytale, the prince was supposed to come and rescue the princess, or, in the case of the stronger, more warrior-like women, the prince was supposed to stand loyally by her side, guarding her back, and protecting her from the things she could not fight. In a fairytale, the hero was supposed to rescue the heroine at the last, desperate moment.
In a fairytale, the heroine would need constant rescuing. In a fairytale, the prince would be the one doing the saving. In a fairytale, the two would share a romantic moment, before riding off into the sunset to enjoy their happily ever after.
But, Ichigo wasn't a princess. She wasn't even a warrior princess. Her life wasn't a fairytale. Instead, it was more like a tragedy. Instead of a romantic life filled with dragons, roses, love, and the eventual defeat of the villain, hers' was a story where the good guys don't always win, and the girl doesn't always get the guy.
Instead of sparkling dresses, and the injured prince being healed by the princess's kiss, her world was a world where one had more scars then clothing, and more death's then victories. Yes, Ichigo decided. Her story was a tragedy.
And the true tragedy remained. Like any good heroine, she was in love with a man who would never return her affections. She was in love with a man who would, even if confessed to, not even try.
Ichigo tilted her head back, and forced back the waiting tears. Forget a tragedy, her life was like a fable, where a nest was in love with a bird. And, just like the nest, no matter how much it was used, eventually, the bird left it behind to soar onto newer skies, and kinder climates.
A slight snarl crossed her lips, and she almost stabbed her notepad from agitation. Deep breaths. She told herself. Deep, calming, soothing breathes. She released a deep sigh. No matter how much of a fable her life was, she couldn't help but wonder how it was true.
She was a Substitute Shinigami, missing school to fight, and barely able to be with her family.
Rukia, her best friend, was almost put to death for something she didn't mean to do.
Her other best friend, Orihime, was kidnapped, and held captive in a land holding nothing but monster.
Her third friend, Chad, almost died, and was subsequently forced to fight in a war that he didn't cause.
Her sisters, Karin and Yuzu, were almost killed.
Byakuya was injured, and would have a permanent scar on his chest, to join the other scar's gained from various battles against hollows; scars caused by hollows. Not by comrades.
In fairytales and in fables, the heroine was always innocent. Ichigo was irrevocably stained with the blood of others, and destined to a life of guilt.
This was her lives story. It wasn't a romantic fairytale about a girl protecting the 'life' of spirits, and defeating the 'evil' hollows. It wasn't even a fable warning about how one should not bite more then one could chew.
She opened her eyes and curled her lips, lifting her head enough to glare at a quote on her page. No matter how much Ichigo wished it were true, Jane Austin was wrong. The heroine didn't always get the battle-scarred hero. Sometimes the hero never got over his scars, and sometimes the heroine never got over her fear.
Her life was a reality of hurting others, regardless of what she meant to do. Was this really all she did? Ichigo shook her head viciously. No. Stop thinking about it. Concentrate on other things. Concentrate. Concentrate. Think of something. Anything.
Her mind flashed through various options before settling on one. Homework! Had to finish her homework! Again she turned to the essay on her lap. The topic only made the guilt she felt worse for, blaring in bold, judging letters, were the words, Crushes: How the Feel, and How it Feels to Have One Returned.
Of course, seeing as how her love would never be returned, she wouldn't really know how it felt, something that was also her fault seeing as how she was too cowardly to confess…
She forced her mind to stick to the subject. School. School. The first half of the essay was written seeing as she knew, in depth, how crushes and love felt. Now she had to do something about how it felt to have your crush returned. She'd probably have to write something long, drawn out and stupid to be able to finish it. Thoughts drifted across her mind, quotes she could use, and phrases that could be interchanged.
She snorted as a Gaijin comic crossed her mind, one that went something along the lines of, "Nothing takes the taste out of peanut butter quite like unrequited love." Quickly, she decided on that as a strong opening sentence, and lowered her pencil to the paper.
"Kurosaki. What are you doing?"
She yelped, and almost threw her pencil and paper. No, wait. She did throw it. One of them at least. Ichigo scrambled for the pencil. Finally managing to keep a hold on it, and not fall off the roof, she lifted her head, meeting the eyes of a certain icy shinigami captain, who was, coincidentally, the root of her 'romantic' problem. She cursed her luck, fate, and Karma. Especially the Karma.
Ichigo cleared her throat with difficulty, and forced herself to return to her reclining position. "What did you do that for, Byakuya? You scared the living tar out of me."
A ghost of a smirk flickered across his face. "You are not a good shinigami if you could not sense me standing next to you for the past fifteen minutes. You're face is immensely interesting to watch."
She prayed her voice, and face, was steady, as she answered. "And what is so interesting about my face?"
The smirk returned, this time to stay. "You're face shows all of your emotions. You seem to have an inability to stay in one mood for any great time. None of the other Shinigami are so open."
A blush rose to her face, before she forcefully shoved it down. With the vanishing of her blush, her temper suddenly decided to fill the space. "Not my fault I was busy thinking. You should do it sometime you know."
The male beside her gave a slight, deep chuckle. Ichigo froze, another blush rising to her cheeks at the sound. Mentally she choked. That was… Hot.
Byakuya sat down next to her, reclining comfortably against the roof tiles. "I do think. Quite often. It comes along with being a Kuchiki and a Captain."
Sadness flashed through her eyes, before vanishing. That's right. He was a Kuchiki. Unlike Renji, or any of the other Shinigami, Kuchiki Byakuya, the head of the Kuchiki family, was untouchable. Silently, in the depths of her mind, she snorted. Renji wasn't the only dog snapping at the faraway stars. The only difference was, Renji had a chance with Rukia. Ichigo had no such chance with Rukia's brother.
Ichigo forced herself to return to the conversation. "That's true. I think being a Captain would be hard."
There was a silence, slightly uncomfortable, but Ichigo forced herself to ignore it in favor of her essay, which she attempted to return to. "What are you writing?"
She jumped slightly, but managed to keep a hold of her pencil. The jerk had caused her to draw a small line, and she quickly and efficiently erased it before continuing. "I'm writing an Essay for my class. If I don't turn it in on time, I'm going to get a bad grade. Then goat-face will kill me."
Byakuya ignored the last comment in favor of his curiosity. "You seem to be having problems with it. You have been working on it for the past hour and a half, and you have only finished a page. What is the topic?"
Ichigo rolled her eyes, embarrassment tightening her belly like a spring. "My class has to write an essay on what if feels like to have a crush, and what it feels like to have that crush returned."
As she gazed at him from the corner of her eye, she couldn't help but laugh at the veiled look of confusion that flitted across his face. "A crush is, by the way, a different way of saying you like a person romantically." She continued on, unaware of what she was saying as she tried to get him to respond so that she could hear his deep, silky voice. "I've finished the first part easily enough. I just am having trouble on writing about what it feels like to have a crush returned."
His eyes kept her captive, and her mind flashed back over cliche sayings that she had heard in the past. Yeah, she thought, dazed. His eyes are like black holes that just pull you into his heart. And what was that about eyes being the windows to your soul. Yeah. That too. His eyes flashed with a veiled emotion, before he softly spoke. "Who would you have loved, to be able to know the feeling of having a romantic feeling towards someone?"
She managed to tear her eyes to the side and blushed. "It's not that important." Please, she prayed, please end with that.
Her plea wasn't answered as he tilted her face back towards his, gazing at her intensely. "Kurosaki. Tell me."
Ichigo tilted her head forward, causing pieces of hair to fall in front of her face. She gazed at his chest, too much of a coward to look him in the eye.
He leaned forward and brushed pieces of her hair away from her face. Her breath caught, and she turned a bright crimson. His voice was silken as he whispered into her ear. "Tell me, Ichigo."
Suddenly, hearing the velvety whisper of her name, her control snapped, and she buried her face in his chest and mumbled her answer. "You. I like you."
With that simple answer, she pulled his head down into a burning kiss before, humiliated beyond belief, she attempted to flee. She barely had time to feel his arms grab hold of her waist, before she found herself, once again, face first into his chest. Ichigo squeezed her eyes shut as tears threatened to fall, and thrashed, trying with all her might to pull away, to escape, to get anywhere where he, and the reminder of her embarrassment existed.
He held her closer, refusing to release her as he lowered his face down to her ear. She tensed, expecting to hear a freezing remark. "Good."
She froze, unable to believe her ears. "What?"
She could feel his lips curl up into a smirk, as he pressed little kisses along the line of her cheekbone. "I said good, Ichigo. You are mine. If you had any romantic feelings toward anybody else, I would simply have to get rid of them before claiming you for myself."
She felt like she were drowning, and pulled her head back to get a good look at him, an action that caused her smaller body to mold itself firmly, and perfectly, against his. "What about Hisana, your last wife?"
Byakuya raised an eyebrow. "And what about her? I loved her, yes. However now she is dead, and I love you. Hisana knew that I loved her despite her inability to return my affections, and if her spirit remained, she would have encouraged our love." He leaned forward, pulling her slight body to his, before nipping, gently, at her ear. A shiver went through Ichigo's body, which only prompted him to hold her tighter.
"You are mine. I see no reason as to why you would have a problem understanding this. Accept it, and my affections."
A blush lit up her face as he pulled her in for a burning kiss, a kiss she eagerly returned. In the back of her mind, she couldn't help but throw out a fervent prayer. Thank you, Jane Austin. Thank you. And with that thought, the world vanished in the booming of fireworks. Literally.
Byakuya had to grab her and shunpo quickly to be able to escape the fireworks set off by the partygoers below without being injured. Again.
Ichigo snickered, comfortable in his arms. "Serves you right, taking advantage of me like that."
Byakuya sighed silently, before leaning down and kissing her again, their forms silhouetted by the silvery moon hanging far above their heads.
