WHEN COWS EAT CRABB APPLES…

One day in Forks, Washington, Jacob decided to go for a stroll to visit his past-time love, Bella. She was being a little pissy that day, so she flicked him off. He took the hint. In a split second, Jacob was in full-out wolf mode and running at his top speed to get away from the ranting Bella. Edward jumped in between them to stop the forming ruckus. Bella immediately jumped onto Edward and they went to frolic in a field of wheat. Next thing Jacob knew he was on his way to visit some old friends, the Vulturi. They had a similar reaction as Bella, only they weren't being swung away by a handsome such as Edward. Or up for frolicking, to Jacob's dismay. They reacted with full outrage, leaving Jacob with no option to head home. He didn't have the best of days today. Later he continued on asking many of the Cullens and members of his wolf clan to play other miniscule games like hide and seek, attack the Vulturi, and tag with him, but they all refused. Jacob was left with no one but himself for the duration of the day. He spent it in the fetal position staring at one corner of his room for hours at a time, only spending rare minutes to consume donuts and urinate.

THE END