From extreme complexities, extreme simplexities emerge- Theodore Roosevelt
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She was an enegma to him. He thought to himself as he watched her flit around her small kitchen every so often as she went about cooking their dinner.
At eight years old she was perhaps one of the most accomplished former Anbu/Hunter nin, medical jutsu users, and of course- his wife... Taken under duress mind you for the sole purpose of protecting her from outside forces who would give their right nut and then some just to get their hands on her, while giving her his last name in secret to give her more freedom than she would have been originally allowed because of her Jinchuuriki status within the village.
Plus it also gave him a little extra wiggle room to take her outside the village when he needed to go on a diplomatic mission or Kage meeting.
It also ensured that upon his death, she would be given every benefit as his wife and allowed to reside within a home of her choosing, given enough money to live on for the rest of her life whether she decided to work later on in life or not.
"What are we having for dinner tonight?" He finally asked as she turned to face him from behind the counter with a head of nice lettuce in one hand and the other with a purple onion, and one small radish, and what looked like a plastic bag of cherry tomato's in it.
"Stir fry chicken and rice, miso soup and a salad with-" She paused for effect because she knew he was probably going to cringe at what choice of dressing she had made. "Mustard dressing."
Yup, he just cringed. The sound of her amusement gave her intent regarding the mustard dressing away as she slowly shook her strawberry blond head and picked up the knife to begin cutting up the vegetables. She had just finished preparing the first salad when she finally asked, "When is Goddie coming back to the village?"
Goddie- of course was Uzu's cute nickname for his former student and one of the three legendary sanin, Jiraya. Whom just happened to be her godfather.
The same man that had urged him to take the girl as his wife when she was still an infant despite the fact that he held no romantic interest in her and viewed her more as a grandchild. The same man who had decked him on three separate occasions- and once having even sicced Tsunade herself on him, just because he had mistakenly hurt the girl's feelings.
"It will be a while yet. A few months I think..." He finally said after several moments of careful thought and calculation.
"And you did remember to leave a clone of yourself at the tower, right." It wasn't really a question. It was a carefully veiled reminder coupled with a threat to his person.
Knowing the drill the elder rolled his eyes at his wife before replying playfully, "Yes mother- Hey!" He shouted as she twisted the blade of the knife in her hand and then flung it at his head causing him to hit the deck automatically and reach up to flip the table just in case when he heard her growl at him without bothering to take her eyes off of her current task of grabbing another knife and finishing their salads.
"Don't even think about it dumbass."
Which was more than enough incentive, along with knowing her personality quirks and the pitfalls that often came with it- to keep his hands from flipping her table and using it as a shield from further flying projectiles she may deem fit to hurl at his head.
Besides, the table wasn't sturdy enough to withstand a chakra blast if she decided to hurl one of those terrible things at him so all in all using it to protect himself from bodily harm was rendered more or less, pointless.
Go figure.
Deciding to try and distract her with some simple conversation in the hopes that she wouldn't throw anything else at him, he peeked over the top of the table at her and said. "I'm thinking of taking some vacation time soon." She paused in mid motion, her little head tilting a tad. Just enough for him to see her angelic little face and the soft glint of her pale neon pink eyes underneath her long bangs.
"What kind of vacation?" She asked as scenario's from several of his previous ones all played through her mind in the span of a 0.2 seconds. She asked not only out of politeness but because she got the feeling that if he was planning on taking some time from the village again, she'd probably be skipping out on her current duties to stalk him and keep him safe.
Like the last time he took a vacation. And the time before that, and the time before that, and the time before that...
"I thought I'd go fishing-" He began to say when she narrowed her eyes at him slightly, a scowl marring her pretty little face as she pictured his version of fishing as opposed to the normal man's fishing.
His involved an whale sized shark with super big, sharp teeth, and a teeny tiny toothpick sized spear in which to catch and kill the blasted thing with.
Letting her breath out slowly, she stared at him and made a mental note to make his dinner a damned last meal as she finally finished putting her salad together and then said, "Dinner time, dead man." Causing the elder to pale considerably and gulp as she gave him a fanged little smile at the look of absolute terror on his face that had him almost crying.
Tonight is going to be another long night. Sarutobi thought to himself as he ate slowly while casting occasional glances in Uzu's direction from underneath his lashes before finally asking. "Do you plan to terrorize me for the rest of my days?"
Uzu didn't reply right away due to the bite of food in her mouth, but from the slightly subtle shift in her aura, Sarutobi could only surmise that her answer was, yes.
"That's elder abuse you know." He growled out at her as she finally finished chewing her food and swallowed.
"Yeah well, that's what terrorists do. They terrorize."
